Promise Kept
by heartlandiansoisle
Summary: Ty visits Amy while she's in Europe and the trip ends up changing their lives. Spoilers up to 7x18, no warnings.
1. Chapter 1

_The helicopter's rotor kept making white twirls around Amy as she was about to step in the big black flying object. She set her last glance at Ty who was standing few feet away - just enough to be closer to Amy, but also enough to be safely away from the helicopter. The young woman smiled out of excitement. It felt strange to leave everything she knew behind and head to the unknown, but she was curious to know what was waiting for her there._

 _Ty tried to hold back the tears, but the air that was blown on to his face by the copter made him shed few of them - maybe not out of feeling this bittersweet emotion, but to keep his eyes moist enough to be able to catch in what he was about to witness: her lover's temporary departure. A strong feeling took over him and he started running towards Amy as she waved at everyone._

 _"Amy, wait!"_

 _"Ty, what are you doing?" Amy's smile dropped. "Don't hurt yourself."_

 _Amy knew they had to be careful around helicopters, but it seemed like Ty didn't really care about it now. When he reached Amy, Ty wrapped her into his arms and pressed her close to give her a proper send-off kiss. A kiss full of longing and passion. Amy soon picked up what he was doing and decided to move her arms from between them to behind his neck. They embraced each other while everyone waited. When their lips finally parted, Ty kept their foreheads together as Amy opened her eyes to look at his fiancé._

 _"I know we said four months would go by fast, and…" Ty started talking and then tilted his head back enough to see Amy's face, "this is your adventure. I want to support you, Amy."_

 _"You do", Amy nodded. "And I thank you for that."_

 _Ty blinked furiously while he was forming a sentence in his head._

 _"I wanna come with you", Ty spoke. Amy opened her mouth a little, not knowing what to say at first. It was not that she wouldn't want that - she would love that! - but there were few things they need to consider. It was romantic in theory, but they had to be realistic._

 _"But what about your school, your work?" Amy pointed out._

 _"I'll figure something out. I mean, I'll arrange things; I'll work extra shifts, I'll study on the road - anything", Ty planned and looked at Amy with determination._

 _"But…" Amy looked at the helicopter. Her bags were packed and they had a strict schedule. It didn't give enough time for Ty to prepare for the trip. And it was like Ty read her mind._

 _"I mean, I'm not coming with you now", Ty looked at the prince who was trying to wait patiently as they held each other, understanding that this was important for them, "but when I get things arranged here. I'll come to you to Europe - if you want me to."_

 _"Are you kidding me? I'd love that!" Amy laughed a little. There was no doubt in her mind. Ty smiled, relieved._

 _"Then I will make it happen", Ty promised. Amy grinned and shed a few tears out of happiness. Ty removed them gently with his thumb and admired her fiancée. She looked absolutely beautiful and it was going to be hard not to see that face every morning for the next few weeks. "I love you, Amy."_

 _"I love you too", she said again. Ty pressed kisses on her lips one more time, not knowing when he could do that again, so he had to take in as much as he could. "So much…" she whispered between them._

 _"Take care of yourself", Ty said to her when she gently took her by her shoulders, to let her go again. He knew she knew how to do that and he trusted her to be okay, but Ty still felt like saying it._

 _"I will", Amy nodded. Ty's hands fell down slowly and he took few steps back. He looked behind Amy and gave Ahmed a nod, letting him know things were okay and they could go now. The prince nodded back and smiled a little._

 _"Ready to go?" he asked from Amy with his thick accent._

 _"Yeah. Yeah, I am", Amy said. Ahmed helped her inside the helicopter as Ty returned to the others._

 _Everyone's eyes were on Ty as they wondered what had been said between the young couple, but he tried to hide from having any kind of eye contact. He was caught inside his head, while trying to hold himself together as he knew that part of his heart was about to travel across lands, across oceans._

 _Jack put his hand on Ty's shoulder to comfort him. Ty turned to watch as the helicopter slowly rose to the air and said his silent goodbyes again. He was going to hold onto that promise like he would hold onto the vision of her._

* * *

Amy stood at the airport and checked her cell phone again. Ty's flight should have been here by now - in fact she had checked it was on time. People were rushing in and walking out with their luggage. It felt like her heart had sunk lower and now made her stomach act all weird.

Two months had gone by fast, but at the same time it had felt like forever that she had gotten in to that helicopter, waved her goodbyes to her family and left Ty behind. Of course they had kept contact every day since then, mostly through texts, but Amy missed having Ty around. Sometimes she would turn to say something to him, but then she recalled that she was in fact in Europe and he was in Canada, kilometers away. Or at times she really wanted to call him, but she knew he was at the clinic and not able to pick up. So, text messages had become handy.

But now, Ty was coming here, and they'd spent the next two weeks together.

Amy had tried to make free time to spend with him, but being on a tight schedule on an Equestrian Tour, she just couldn't stop working for two weeks straight. So, she'd have some days where she would absolutely have to work, but Amy was hoping to bring Ty with her those days. It was a good thing he didn't mind horses, because otherwise he would get really bored. It was all about horses now.

Amy lowered her gaze to check her phone again, when she suddenly felt someone cover her eyes with their hands. At first she got startled by the surprise, but then she realized it couldn't be anyone else but Ty.

"I'm sorry, miss, I think I'm lost…" Ty's voice said. Amy's lips curled up. It was like music to her ears. "I was hoping you could help me."

Amy removed his hands and turned around, a wide grin painted on her face. The butterflies from her stomach flew free now. He was here!

"Well, I could certainly try…" Amy said and wrapped her arms immediately around him. Ty's face lit up when he saw her fiancée's face again. She looked absolutely beautiful.

"Oh, are you always this friendly here in Europe…?" he acted abashed.

"Yes", she just said and kissed him. Ty responded and pulled her closer. Amy felt complete again.

That night, they were staying at one of the hotels Amy had already become so familiar with. She knew some of the staff by their name, was greeted on her way in and out and knew her way around as she had taken lazy strolls after hard day's work almost every day for few hours.

Amy could no longer remember what it was like to have her things in one place for good, not taking them out of the bag and putting them back soon after. But everything still felt nice and fresh; she loved discovering places, meeting new people and working in different places. The horses were amazing, the job was nicely challenging and the benefits weren't bad either. And the hotel rooms weren't actually that bad, even though they hardly felt like home with all the fancy things and goodies Amy had never even knew about.

"Wow, I felt so filthy using that bathroom", Ty said when they were getting ready for bed. Amy was going through some schedules for tomorrow, but then put her iPad away on the night table, to listen to what Ty had to say. "Like, is my toothpaste worthy of their sinks."

Amy laughed.

"Well yeah, the place is not too shabby…" she admitted.

"I've never been to a place like this before. I've only stayed at motels. And look at you - looks like you've done a bit of a shopping", Ty noticed her new nightwear. It was silky, even had lace on it, so it was something he had not expected to see on Amy. "You fit right in."

"Is it weird…?" Amy felt self-conscious all of a sudden. Ty crawled in and shook his head.

"Not at all. Just… new", he said and admitted the spoon position with her. "That means I just have to get to know it better…" Ty fiddled the fabric and Amy smiled. She knew this tone of his voice.

"Of course", she giggled a little. Ty started kissing her neck.

"Hmm, that feels nice…" Amy closed her eyes and relaxed.

"I've been wanting to do this for a long time now…" Ty spoke and caressed her gently. "And now that I can, it just feels so much better than I remembered."

"Hmm…" Amy murmured lazily.

"You smell really nice too", he combed away her long blonde hair with his fingers and took in her scent. "New perfume?"

But there was no response. Just silence.

"Amy…?" Ty asked and leaned forward to see if she was still awake. But she wasn't. Her chest was heaving slowly and her eyes were closed. Amy had fallen asleep.

Ty sighed and rolled on his back. He checked the time. Well, he figured it was no wonder she was so tired, it was 11 pm already. Which meant it was still late afternoon in Alberta.

As Amy was driftin away, Ty did not feel sleepy at all…

"Ty…" Ty heard Amy whisper hours later as she caressed his cheek. He peeked through one eye and saw Amy all dressed up for work, standing next to the bed. A faint light was drawing her silhouette from behind inside the dim bedroom. Her hair was pulled back and she looked like a professional.

"Hmm, what time is it…?" Ty coughed a little to clear his throat.

"7 o'clock. I have a meeting, like I told you", Amy reminded him about a conversation they had had yesterday on dinner.

"Oh yeah yeah", Ty nodded. He felt exhausted and buried himself even deeper inside the warmth of the bed. Only his short brown hair peeked out under the white covers.

"Will you be okay?" Amy asked.

"Mh-yeah…"

"There's breakfast for you and you can use room service if you want something else. It's on Ahmed", Amy reminded. I'm not gonna feel bad about using his money, so maybe some fine Champagne for breakfast, Ty thought to himself but kept his mouth shut. "Will you be studying like you said?"

"Probably…" Ty said, but didn't even want to think about that right now. Sleep was all he wanted. He wasn't one to have a conversation with this early, so Amy decided to give up. But there was one more thing she needed.

"A kiss to-go?" Amy asked. Ty turned around, brought his face out of hiding and puckered his lips so they could exchange a peck. His eyes were still closed, but he was never too tired to have a kiss, that much she knew. Amy smiled and fixed Ty's covers to make sure he wouldn't get cold. It was drafty in these rooms for some reason.

Amy collected her jacket and phone. Ty could hear her close the door as she left, but from that point on, everything went black and he soon fell back asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

"I couldn't believe it was Zeus, it was like he wasn't even the same horse", Amy praised the stallion to Ahmed when they were having dinner one night.

Ty had now been staying over for almost a week and they had fallen into this broken routine, where Ty was still struggling with European time, trying to focus on his books and Amy was running off to work for few hours here and there. At first Ty had figured it was just stiffness after being apart for this long, but it seemed like the problems weren't going anywhere. He wasn't too happy to have another week of the same bleakness, especially when in his mind he had expected the trip to be a fun thing together and in reality it was slowly turning into anything but.

"I know. He really loves the competition. It's like he lives for it", Ahmed said enthusiastically, revealing his perfect set of teeth as he grinned out of excitement. Ty was poking his food, not too sure what he was even eating, and hardly listening. Sure, he liked horses and understood that the competition was going to be a topic of discussion, but seemed like it was everything anyone talked about. "What do you think, Ty?" Ahmed had set his eyes on him after noticing he wasn't present.

"What? I'm sorry?" Ty came back to Earth and looked around. Amy's smile died a little when she realized he must have been bored by now. "I wasn't really listening…" he confessed.

"That's okay", Ahmed nodded. "Is the food not to your liking?"

"It's fine, I just… I'm not really hungry", Ty said. The portions were half of what he was used to, so it wasn't like he was stuffed already. He had just lost his appetite.

"Is everything okay…?" Amy asked. Maybe something was up, something that had gone pass her. She had been busy, but had tried to make sure Ty had everything he needed and he was looked after.

"Yeah. I think I just need some air. This restaurant's really crowded", Ty gave her an excuse and looked around.

A pianist was entertaining a big group of people in a very intimate setting, surrounded by candle light and white flowers. It was an elegant place, another one of those places where Ty didn't feel comfortable in. People's chatting created this low soundtrack you could easily drown your own thoughts in.

"Do you mind if I come with you?" Amy asked.

"No, of course not. Do as you wish", Ty said and got up.

"Excuse us", Amy apologized to Ahmed and the prince hurried to help her with her chair. Ty felt bad about it - he should have been the one helping Amy with things, even though she was fully capable of getting up herself…

"It's alright. I'll be waiting for you here", Ahmed said and glanced at the couple. Amy smiled kindly and offered her hand to Ty. It was almost unbelievable how easily Amy had found her way in to this kind of setting, Ty thought. Her posture was different, she spoke differently and she expected different kind of treating. It was almost like a strange dream.

They walked outside, by the river that run through the city and admired the city lights as they reflected back from the water. Both were silent, but Amy felt like she was expected to say something.

"What's wrong?" she finally asked. Ty looked at her quickly and shrugged. They walked on, slowly.

"Nothing." He didn't want to worry her. They had both expected this for months and he didn't want to ruin it for them.

"I can see something's up. Don't lie to me, Ty", Amy stopped and pulled his arm so that he would turn in front of her. Her eyes were fixed on him, but seemed like Ty was avoiding any eye contact. "Talk to me."

"Is this what you want?" Ty asked then. Amy frowned.

"What do you mean…?"

"This kind of lifestyle. Is it your dream?" he needed to know. Amy thought about it and felt confused as to why Ty was even asking her the question. Of course she didn't expect to live like this forever. Had she somehow given him the impression that she did?

"No. Where is this coming from?"

"You just seem so comfortable with this kind of thing, it's almost like I don't know you", Ty explained. "The way you dress, the way you talk, the way you behave all in all."

"It's just how it is here", Amy tried to make him see.

"Here? In Europe? With Ahmed?" Ty wanted her to be a little more specific. Amy's brows jumped up.

"Are you jealous…?"

"No, I'm not jealous", Ty wanted to make it clear. "I trust you. I just…" he bit his lip, trying to make the words come out right, "how is it going to be like when you come back home. Are you just gonna go back to being you?"

"This is me!" Amy brought her hand to her chest in defense.

"No, it isn't. This is an act. The only thing I recognize about you now is the fact that you're still crazy about horses. But if I were to met you now…" his voice drifted off as he shook his head in disbelief.

"If you were to met me now, what?" Amy wanted him to finish his sentence as she glared at him. Ty didn't get what it was like; she couldn't just be like she used to, everyone would've just taken her as some little country cowgirl and no one would take her seriously.

"I don't know if I would even think about you after we'd meet", Ty finally confessed. He was tired and frustrated, not thinking what he was saying or how Amy would take them, but as soon as the words came out, he knew he was in for a backlash.

"So, you're saying you don't love me anymore? Is that it?" Amy spit the words out of her mouth.

"I do! Of course I love you", Ty insisted. "I just don't recognize you anymore."

"Well, this is who I am here. This is the professional me. Maybe you're not too familiar with it because we don't work together and all you see is the version that I'm outside work", Amy explained.

"No, Amy, you're always the same", Ty knew. "You don't act like you're somebody else, you're always just you. And that's what I love about you. You don't have to pretend to be something else, because being who you are makes you the best."

"I had to change, Ty. If I hadn't, the home sickness would have killed me. You have no idea what it's like to be away from your whole family, surrounded by strangers and different culture, have nowhere to go when you just need to curl up and cry because you feel out of place", Amy said furiously, tears forming in her eyes. "And I've noticed… this works. If I just keep it up, if I just focus on doing these things, then it's not so bad."

"But that's not how it's supposed to be, Amy. You're not supposed to act like you like it or that you fit in", Ty worried. "It should just come out, naturally."

Amy scoffed and walked pass Ty. She stood behind him now, eyes set on the river, as she needed some space and time to think. The slow pace of the water eased her mind.

Ty turned around and looked at her back. Even her silhouette looked strange. He was lucky he had covered the right girl's eyes at the airport week ago or things would have been awkward.

"I get that it's hard and that this has forced you to grow up really fast. It's not easy for anyone and I can't imagine how it's been like here", Ty spoke.

"Yeah, that's right. You have no idea", Amy said. It was one thing they agreed on.

"But I'm trying to understand. Maybe you don't understand either, but you have to. I'm worried about you, Amy", he told her. "And I'm worried about us."

"Why?" Amy crossed her hands across her chest. Ty walked over to her so he could see her face. It was weird having an argument with someone's back facing you. She still stared ahead, only seeing his figure from the corner of her eye.

"Because… when you come back… I don't have anything like this to offer to you", Ty voiced his fear. Amy looked at him, fire still burning behind her eyes.

"I don't expect you to", Amy shook her head. "I realize we don't have this and I never want to have this for us. I'm just making this so we can get the money and do whatever we want to." She sighed. This was so ungrateful of Ty, after everything she had done for them. "I've done everything to make sure you're good, that you got everything you need, and this is how you–"

"Amy, all I need is you!" Ty cut her mid-sentence.

"Well I'm here!" Amy shout back. They didn't realize just how loud they were being, until some passerby shot a judgmental look at them. Amy sighed and tried to fix up her act.

"Are you…?" Ty asked and it was almost like a whisper. "Because I'm not so sure anymore."

"You can find your back to the hotel, right?" was all Amy said. When Ty nodded, she turned around and went back toward the restaurant. Ty sighed.

Conversation was over, he figured.


	3. Chapter 3

Ty stared at the see-through curtains of the hotel room. He had no idea how long he had been in that position, but it felt like hours - yet there was no sunrise in the horizon. His shoulder was getting numb, so he gave the pillow few punches and adjusted it back under his head, not that it felt any better now.

The lights of the city were twinkling somewhere in the distance and he thought about the people out there, doing whatever they were doing. Laughing, crying, kissing, fighting. He felt like he needed some kind of outlet for his feelings until they'd overwhelm him and he'd become numb.

For two months he had had kilometers and kilometers between him and Amy, but during that time he had never felt this distant from her as he did now - and she was just one door away, in the bedroom, while he slept on the couch.

He could hear Amy tip-toeing to the bathroom. As he waited and listened, Ty saw lights getting switched on and heard running water. A flush of the toilet, lights switched back off and some shuffle of feet.

"Amy…" he stopped her just as she was about to get back into the bedroom. Amy froze and listened. Had Ty really said her name?

"Yeah…?" she tried.

"Can you come here?" Ty asked. "Please?"

"Ty, I'm really tired. I have a meeting tomorrow morning", Amy tried to excuse herself. She wasn't in the mood to drag this fight into the wee hours of the morning, giving her no time to rest.

"I know, but I can't sleep like this. Not when we are fighting."

"I didn't wanna fight", Amy replied, trying to put it all on him.

"You think I wanted either?" Ty was a little hurt, but then quickly calmed himself down. He didn't want to turn this into another argument. Sometimes they were so passionate about their own points of view that it easily lead into a heated conversation. Ty tried to avoid that now, because this hotel room was all he had. He couldn't just get inside of his truck and drive away like he usually did if things got too much. He had to deal with this, now. "I just– Come here, please."

He'd feel better if he'd have her near, since it was weird to talk to a voice that hovered somewhere in the darkness. At least the city behind the curtains shed some light around the couch.

Amy walked over to him, but didn't sit down. The way she was reserved and ready to bolt made Ty nervous, almost unwilling to talk. But he had to get this off his chest, so he sat up, at least being somewhat closer to her level.

"Answer to me honestly", Ty requested and looked at Amy. "Do you like it here? Do you like being on this tour?"

"Yes. I like it here", Amy said, establishing her opinion from earlier. The annoyance was already evident in her voice.

"What do you like about it?" Ty asked the questions, trying to remain calm, even though he had a sense Amy wasn't admitting things to herself and he on the other hand could see right through her.

"I love the job, I like the horses, the people here are great", Amy listed. Ty nodded. That sounded reasonable enough.

"Do you like being away from home?" Ty went on. He knew there was no place like home for Amy. She loved Heartland, more than anything, so hearing the answer to this was crucial.

"Of course not, but this is a tour", Amy reminded him, "it means it goes around the world. I have to be away from home."

"No, but listen, Amy, listen", Ty interrupted her. "You have a job, horses that need you and nice people at home, too. So, what is it about the tour that appeals to you more than home?"

"Are you trying to say that I should've just stayed home?" Amy cocked her eyebrow.

"No, I'm asking you a question. Forget what you think I'm asking, just answer to me without thinking what's behind the question: is there something here that you like better than being at home?" Ty repeated.

Amy thought about it for a while, because she couldn't just explain it as simply as Ty wanted to hear it. Some part of her brain was still trying to push through the idea that Ty had some kind of agenda here, making things harder. But she tried to do as he wished, explain it without thinking too much what Ty was suggesting.

"You wouldn't understand…" Amy eventually came to a conclusion.

"Well, I'm trying. That's why I wanted to talk", Ty responded. Amy looked at him, sighed, and tried.

"I just feel like this is where I'm supposed to be right now", she started.

"Why?" Ty wanted to know more about this need.

"Because… I made a promise. And everyone was so supportive of me. And the money– It's gonna be great, Ty. We can finally buy that ranch", Amy said, a hope in her voice. She tried to make Ty realize how much she wanted that for them. Maybe if some of that excitement would catch him too, he'd leave this interrogation be.

"So basically you're doing this for anyone but yourself?" Ty checked.

"I'm doing this for me too, of course", Amy explained.

"Sounded a lot like you'd do this for Ahmed, for your family and me. But you seem… well, actually you admitted, that you can be miserable here", Ty recalled.

"I can be miserable at home too. Miserable thinking that I could be on this tour instead of being there. Ty, you know I love it there, but this is where I'm supposed to be right now." For some reason Amy felt like protecting something within herself and siding against Ty. He wasn't sure why, because she had to know he was only doing this because he loved her. Ty wanted to think he almost knew what she wanted better than she knew herself. There were all these elements clouding her judgement.

"Amy… If you wanna come home, you can. No one would think less of you", Ty then said, assuming what she was really trying to avoid in the conversation. Amy looked back at him. He had hit a jackpot, but Amy was too proud to admit it. She was ready to make herself suffer to gain something that could offer them a lifetime of happiness. "I'm leaving in a week, sooner if needed, so I'm asking you to consider this… Come home with me."

"Ty, I can't. And I don't want to", Amy frowned. "I have responsibilities–"

"Forget responsibilities. That's an excuse people give when they don't have their priorities straight", Ty talked over her again.

"No, Ty. The job isn't my priority, we are. That's why I'm doing this, because of the money!" Amy repeated herself, wondering why it couldn't get through Ty's thick skull.

"I know, I get that, but forget about the money for one minute", Ty asked. "I know this pays well and it's amazing. I'd be lying if I'd say I wouldn't want that ranch myself, but the way things are going right now… I don't know who I'm going to end up buying the ranch with. Who are you gonna be if you keep living like this."

"So you think I should come home with you?" Amy scoffed.

"No. Not if you don't want to. But… if I'm gonna be here for another week, things have to change. You have to prove me that we are your priority. I can't have this for another week. I'd might as well be at home if you don't have time for me", Ty rolled his eyes.

"We were having dinner tonight, remember?"

"With Ahmed", he reminded. "Wouldn't exactly call that a date…"

"What do we need dates for?" Amy was confused.

"Amy…" Ty sighed. "That's not my point. You're right, we don't need dates. We are engaged, that's my point. It doesn't feel like it. It feels like we're living two separate lives. And I don't want that. I want a life with you."

"That's what I'm building here", Amy went back again. Ty sighed. Not this again.

"Okay, let's not… let's not go to that route again", he asked. "Just… think about it, okay? If you still want me for another week, I'll stay. But if it doesn't matter to you if I'm here or if I'm in Hudson, then… I'll leave."

"You can't do this to me, Ty. You know I'm busy. You knew it when you came here", Amy shook her head. He was in no position to give her some kind of ultimatums.

"Yeah, I knew it. But you also promised we'd do things together. And we've barely done that", Ty pointed out, and as soon as he saw Amy opening her mouth again, knowing what she'd say, he hurried to continue, "just us, I mean. Not me hanging around, watching you train those horses. That's not quality time. I'm just a backdrop."

Amy blinked her eyes, feeling her lids getting heavier, while her mind was full of words and about to explode soon. She was exhausted, in need of some sleep and time to think. Amy knew that if they'd go on, she'd get irritated about everything and this frustrating fight would never end.

"Okay… I'll think about it", Amy promised, but it was more like an escape plan than a promise. "Can I go to sleep now?"

"Yeah. Of course. I'm sorry I kept you up. Just had to say those things", Ty spoke.

He might have felt easier after vomiting so many feelings out, but meanwhile Amy was left dealing with all those things on her own.


	4. Chapter 4

Amy walked inside Ahmed's stables and looked around, still not believing how lucky she was to have come to know something like this as her office. It was a far cry from the Heartland barn with its spacious stalls, clean aisles and shiny horses. She didn't think Heartland was pathetic, just that it desperately needed some work and updating. But knowing Jack, nothing would ever change. Still, Amy was determined to change some things around there now, since she had more vision and experience to know what they'd need.

That was when she'd get back home. There was still weeks to go before that.

"Hey, Ares", Amy stepped toward a black gelding that was popping his head out of the stall to see if she had any treats. "No carrots today", she smiled, knowing what he preferred. Something about him reminded her of Spartan. Her little black Quarter horse was doing fine, according to Georgie, but based on the pictures she got almost daily from her niece, Spartan had gained some weight. "He can't wait to see you again", Georgie's messages read. "He's in serious need of exercise!"

Amy did miss the horse dearly, but she was here in Normandy now, fulfilling her dream. Or, whatever you called this.

It wasn't exactly what she had had in mind, but sometimes in life the best things happened unexpectedly. Amy had learned that it was why you should never really plan your whole life completely, because if you did, you could miss out great opportunities and end up being too hung up on something that you had planned when things had been different and you yourself had been a different. It was good to have long goal terms, but at the end of the day it was supposed to be all about living in the moment.

"Amy", Ahmed caught her with his horse. She looked at him, but soon brought her eyes back to Ares. She wasn't in the mood to talk right now and hoped that whatever Ahmed wanted, was going to be brief. "I have been looking for you. Is everything okay? You seemed a little absent at the meeting."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just didn't sleep well, that's all", she nodded, stroking the gelding's velvety muzzle. "I'm sorry."

"It is quite alright", Ahmed said, trying to figure out if there was something that could be done about it. "Is it the work? It is stressing you too much, yes?"

"No, no", Amy shook her head and smiled. "It's good. Everything's good in that department."

"But…?" Ahmed sensed there was something else. "Everything okay with Ty?" Maybe Ty had brought in trouble with him.

Amy wasn't sure what to say. She wanted to confine in someone, but at the same time didn't know if Ahmed wanted to hear too much about her personal life. She could have called Lou, but Amy knew her sister wasn't going to be objective about this. And Lou couldn't possibly imagine the kind of thing she had going on here, just like Ty.

"I am intruding", Ahmed figured the reason for Amy's long pause. "My apologizes. It is just hard to watch you so… sad."

"I'm not sad", Amy looked at him. Or was she? Could everyone tell better than she - even Ty? "Do I look sad…?"

"A little", Ahmed admitted. "So, tell me, what is it that I can do? A day off? Few days off? Just tell me and I will make it happen."

"Ahmed, we're in the middle of a tour, we need to practice. I'm your head trainer, I can't just take days off. I'm committed to this", Amy explained, hoping that Ahmed wouldn't think she was trying to slack off simply because she couldn't make difference between her personal and professional life.

"I know, Amy. But it is like you say, a horse has to want to perform or it will not work. So, you are in a way like a horse", Ahmed explained. Amy found it amusing and giggled. "Well, no, not a horse", he soon withdrew back his words, fearing that he had offended Amy. "But you do understand what I'm saying, yes?" Ahmed corrected, his heart pounding.

"Yeah, it's alright, Ahmed, I get it", she said softly. Ahmed smiled nervously. He was still trying to get a hang of this way of western communicating, but fortunately Amy didn't seem to mind if he made mistakes while trying to educate himself. "So… you think it would be possible to have a few days off then…?" Amy checked carefully. She didn't want to push it or demand that kind of treatment, but Ty's words still haunted her.

"Of course. I could make preparations, have you the best treatment, whatever you ask. It is not a problem", Ahmed repeated.

"I'll think about it. Is that okay?" Amy checked.

"Yes, yes. Of course", Ahmed said, nodding. Amy smiled. "See? Better. You are already smiling", he noted. Amy felt self-aware and blushed a little. "Amy, please, do not be afraid to ask me or talk to me about anything. I am here for you. Your wish is my command, as they say." He nodded nobly, respecting Amy that way.

"But Ahmed, I can't just… use you for everything. That's not how I work", Amy explained.

"Use me?" Ahmed echoed, not sure he was following.

"Well, all these amazing things, I don't want you to think I'm only here because of the money", Amy wanted to clear that out. Ahmed nodded stiffly. "You're my friend too, okay? I'm happy to be here." As she said the words, Amy could almost see Ty's face looking at her with that challenging expression. Prove it, it said. Prove that you are happy here.

"I am delighted to hear that", Ahmed felt at ease. "There was one thing I wanted to talk to you about", he then recalled.

"Oh? What is it?" Amy asked.

She noticed she didn't get so tense around him anymore, because they had an understanding now. It no longer worried her what Ahmed would say, because she had more authority and say in things when it came to their team. They were more equal than before and in that way they had found a mutual place to work things through together.

"I was hoping you could move in to the mansion", Ahmed suggested. "You can still live in the hotel if you want to, because I know how you like exploring the city, but some of the team members are staying in the mansion and I was thinking maybe it would be nicer for you as well, stay closer to your people."

"Oh. I'll… I'll have to think about that. Is that okay?" was the answer Amy could give to him right now.

"Yes, of course. I should get back to work anyway. Will you be alright?" Ahmed had to make sure first. Amy nodded.

"Yeah. Thank you, Ahmed. Thanks for looking after me."

"Of course. You do not have to worry about a thing", Ahmed assured and then left. Amy watched as the prince disappeared to the aisles of the big stable. Things were so easy with him. She would just voice something and it would get done. Whatever she needed, she got it.

So, why was it so hard with Ty? It wasn't like she was demanding impossible things from him. Just a little understanding and respect. Isn't that what everyone wanted? She wasn't being too selfish, was she?

Amy returned to the hotel few hours later and put down her keys and phone to the side table after taking off her green team coat. She had not woken Ty up when she left in the morning and this would be the first time they'd meet after the conversation they had had last night. Amy had not really come in to any conclusions, so she tensed up, knowing Ty would want answers.

The clock was ticking.


	5. Chapter 5

Ty sat on the sofa, his head buried in the book. Hearing steps, he looked up and saw Amy standing in the doorway. Neither of them said anything for a while, but their eyes were still fixed on each other.

"Let's get away. For few days. Just you and I", Amy finally opened her mouth. Ty had to put the book down because he was so surprised about what he was hearing. No explanations, no arguing, just answers.

Something must have gone through to Amy, because she was suggesting what Ty had hoped for them but what she had refused to realize earlier. Over time, Ty had realized they never really solved an argument from one sitting. A heated conversation would occur, things would be said and then they'd leave everything splattered around until one of them would cave in and they'd talked things through, rationally, like adults. Seems like it was the case this time too. As annoying as it was to go through over and over again, it was still better than forcing an agreement about something just because "they had to".

"And what about your job…? You think Ahmed would let you have few days off?" Ty asked. Amy knew already he would - Ahmed had been the one suggesting the days off in the first place, but on some level she wanted to appear better than she was to her fiance, because he had left her feeling so crappy about herself for not having time for him. So she decided to make Ty think that the thought had been all hers.

"Well, this is important to me, so… he just has to", Amy said, feeling wrong about telling little white lies, but it was for a good cause. She didn't want Ty to think that she had not actually come up with any conclusion on her own, because that would only make him win the argument and in her mind she had not done anything wrong. She just had to win this round, if only to have some dignity. Amy was proving Ty wrong - that was what this was about, nothing else. So since Ahmed had offered her few days off and it went well together with what Ty wished, she could kill two birds with one stone and just get this over with. Amy felt so stressed about everything already, that this argument just felt so unnecessary on top of it all. If she was able to make Ty happy with having few days off, then it was the right thing to do. Even if she wasn't telling him the whole truth.

"Okay", Ty said and even smiled a little. He got up and walked over to Amy, giving her a kiss and hoping it would be the transition to a much more relaxed environment. "Thank you. It means a lot to me."

He had his hands on Amy's arms, but she still felt stiff. Maybe she was still mad at him and it was stupid to him, but Amy just couldn't get herself in the mood where she'd be all lovey-dovey after all Ty had said. She needed some time.

So, Amy just nodded, letting Ty know that she had heard him, but decided not to follow his lead.

"I'll ask Ahmed what days I could take off. Maybe Wednesday and Thursday", she suggested, not putting much thought to it, if she was being completely honest.

"Okay, sounds good. And I'll leave on Saturday, remember?" Ty reminded.

"I remember", Amy nodded. Ty kissed her again, feeling that maybe by Saturday he would feel like not going back to Canada, just like he was supposed to feel after spending time with his future wife who was currently staying in France. Had Amy not come to him with a suggestion to make things better, he might have already booked tickets home and left by Wednesday.

So, Ty was glad that she had.

"I'm going to take a shower", Amy announced, gently removing herself from Ty's arms. She walked to the bedroom to get rid of most of her clothes and Ty followed.

"Do you need company…?" Ty's voice was hopeful. He really wanted - no, needed - to get back to that closeness that they usually shared, so he'd know they were okay again. Ty hated fighting, it was the last thing he ever wanted, but sometimes it was the necessary evil to solve things or make them a little bit better.

"I don't know. Do what you like", Amy sighed.

Her behavior didn't go unnoticed by Ty.

"Everything alright?" he checked. Maybe he had missed something. A cue of some sort.

"Yeah. I just didn't sleep well last night", was her excuse, again. It was true, but not the whole truth. "I just wanna relax now."

"Okay", Ty accepted her answer, knowing not to pester her too much. It was better to just keep a low profile when Amy was having "a mood". Eventually she'd come around when she wanted, on her own terms, and things would be back to normal.

Even if Ty couldn't understand how Amy had had trouble making time for them, since she had been so excited about him coming over, he wasn't blind to the situation. He knew Amy wasn't here to have fun and this was serious business. So, of course she was under a lot of pressure and in no way did Ty want to add to it. While it might have seem like he was being needy with his request to have more time with Amy, he wasn't doing it completely for selfish reasons: he wanted Amy to get some time off too. He wanted her to take care of herself. But Ty didn't want to force it to her - it was supposed to come from her too. There was no point having time together if it was just to please the other person. Now it seemed like Amy wanted it too, and even though she seemed annoyed about something right now, things were hopefully going to be different on their trip.

Amy's shoulder brushed Ty's arm when she walked pass him, heading to the bathroom. Ty was still contemplating whether to join her or not. He wanted to, but did Amy want it too? Her answer to him had seemed like she didn't care either way. Something about it made Ty feel awkward, so eventually he decided to sit this one out then. Returning back to the sofa, he pulled out his laptop. It was a good thing the hotel had great Wifi and he had been able to keep up with school work and everything else back home.

But now he was looking into something else.

"Places to visit + Normandy", he typed to the search engine and waited for the results with a smile on his face. Some kind of romantic get-away sounded good right now…

Meanwhile, Amy got into the shower closet and closed the glass door behind her. She made the usual adjustments with the temperature and pressure, and waited until the water started dripping on her skin. Stepping under the shower head, Amy let the water whip her skin as she closed her eyes and wiped away the make-up. She felt so numb inside and wasn't sure why. Everything was so overwhelming that she had expected to feel like she wasn't in control of it all, but instead she felt nothing. And she didn't care about control - or anything at all.

The scariest part was to admit that this dark feeling had started to build up ever since Ty had set his foot to the hotel room. At first it had been exciting, showing him around and telling him about everything and everyone, but slowly he had started to feel like a burden, something Amy had to assist every step of the way. He was like a big baby that needed her every second of the day and it was starting to annoy her. But at the same time Amy knew she was supposed to love him and yes, she did care about him still, but to imagine kissing him, doing things together as a couple and just talking about wedding… it was almost repulsive to her.

Suddenly she was swollen with the emotions, all at once. Then came the tears. Something about her had changed and she didn't like the person she was around Ty. That really started to feel alarming to her, especially since she was wearing his engagement ring and they were soon-to-be-married.

She was supposed to stop feeling this way. Or was she supposed to end the relationship?


	6. Chapter 6

A horn woke Amy from her daydream. They were driving with Ty, heading out from the city to a place Amy could no longer remember by the name. Ever since Monday, she had been distant and lost in thoughts while Ty had been planning this quick trip. She had agreed to everything, not even sure what it was that they were doing since most of his words went in from one ear and came out from the other. Her part had been making sure that Ahmed was okay with her having few days off.

Not only had Ahmed been okay with her having two days off, he had also been kind enough to lend them a car.

"What the–! What a moron! Did you see that?!" Ty scoffed and gestured toward the car that had wedged back to their lane just now. Amy didn't bat an eye at the situation, because she was so used to this kind of driving by now. You could tell that few fender-benders didn't slow the drivers down here, because the fancy cars were full of scratches and dents. The people were fearless and willing to take risks even when their lives were on the line. "The drivers here, unbelievably rude… Are they trying to get us killed, or what? Or do they have a death wish?" he muttered. "If I don't get this car back to Ahmed without a single scratch, he's going to have me killed."

"Right… 'Cause he has assassins for stuff like that", Amy rolled her eyes at how Ty always made Ahmed out to be the bad guy. He just had to mention the prince and twist it so that Ahmed was asking something unreasonable.

"He might have not said it, but it was implied when he handed me the keys", Ty said, not willing to push his luck.

His heart was racing as he was trying to keep the car on the road while making sure the other drivers weren't going to crash into them as they were speeding by.

Amy returned back to her own mind, thinking this through one more time: surely a week was not enough to make her resentment for Ty so big that she had to break this off, but what was she supposed to do when she no longer felt like being around him? She had expected this to be a bliss, but instead she felt like Ty was restraining her from doing things that she loved and felt so natural doing. Amy preferred the time alone over this.

Whenever she saw Ty, she thought about the wedding and felt her feet getting cold. She was not ready, she didn't want marriage right now. There was so much more for her out there, but Ty was insisting for them to settle down already. How could she settle down when she had one foot out of the door? Maybe this thing had been brooding for months and Amy had not realized it until she had to face Ty. Up until now, she had been able to avoid Ty and the wedding talk by saying she was busy and stressed, or simply by tossing the cell phone away.

"You okay?" Ty asked when Amy had hardly spoken a word since they left.

"Yeah", Amy said but then sighed, "or… I don't know. Can you pull over?"

"Sure. What is it? Are you feeling sick?"

"Something like that…" Amy mumbled. Ty tried to find the next resting place and steered the car to the side, checking if Amy was going to puke. Amy unbuckled her seat-belt and quickly got out of the car, like she couldn't breathe in there.

"Hang on", Ty spoke and stepped out from the car too. He was worried Amy was going to faint, she looked so pale. "Is it something you ate?"

Amy didn't answer, she just walked so far that she had to stop when a fence was preventing her from walking off from a little cliff. Ty soon caught up with her.

"Amy? Are you even listening?" he asked, starting to get irritated. Seemed like this wasn't just about nausea. Nothing had really changed since the fight, except now they were going away together. "Answer to me."

"Stop doing that!" Amy said and shook him off when he took her by the arm. Ty stepped back, stunned by her sudden reaction. "Don't touch me, don't speak to me and don't demand anything from me! It's starting to drive me insane!"

"What are you talking about…?" Ty didn't quite follow.

"I can't stand when you're being so… so clingy! Like, how about trying to do something for yourself once!" Amy shouted. Ty wasn't sure were all of this was coming from. He had hardly bugged Amy about anything. "I can't even think living with you if this is how it's going to be."

They had never really lived together, but this might have been as far as they had gone in that sense: both of them were completely independent from anyone. Amy's visits at the trailer had always been quick and Ty staying in the loft had hardly been about living together when Lou had been the one preparing dinners and Jack had kept other things going for them.

"What are you on about? What have I done?" Ty frowned.

"Amy, let's do this, Amy, let's do that, Amy, what's this, Amy, where are you going, Amy, when are you gonna come back, Amy, help me with this, Amy, help me with that! I can't believe you've been able live on your own for three years when you can't do anything alone!" Amy let it out.

"Are you kidding me? You think this is how it's going to be like when we're living together?" Ty was hurt. "I'm here and I don't know this place at all. It's all strange to me. There's nothing I know here, just you - but to be honest, I don't even know if I know you at all anymore. I don't know anyone here, so who else could I even rely on?!"

"You know Ahmed", Amy said. It wasn't her fault Ty couldn't mingle, but talking to Ahmed could have been a start - if he had only wanted it to be. Ahmed had a great team on board and Ty could have easily made friends if he had even tried. Heck, he could have even made connections! But, no!

Ty scoffed. "Oh yeah, 'cause we have so much in common…"

"That's always your problem, isn't it! You always think you're better than anyone else. You're never willing to think that even though people have money or they lead a different kind of life, there's actually a person who–"

"It's not my fault they look down at me!" Ty spit out.

"So what - you think you return the treatment? How mature. How about being a bigger person for once and kill them with kindness… That might get you some results", Amy shook her head, feeling out of breath from all the yelling.

Ty bit the side of his lip and looked Amy with welled up eyes. He knew he wasn't good, but he was trying to be better. He was already better than he had been before, but it was a slow process to unlearn all the things he had learned along the way whenever people had hurt him and proven his fears right. It was unfair of Amy to hit him with that. She knew how deeply it would hurt him.

There was so much going on in this argument, but the biggest thing that bothered Ty right now was not talked about. So, he had to ask.

"Do you even want to go to this trip…? Just tell me the truth."

Amy looked back at him, feeling like lying, but what was the use? It was not going to lead anything good. It was only going to make her feel even more trapped.

"No."

Ty laughed, but there was no warmth or cheer in his voice.

"You didn't think about telling me that before we left the hotel? Before we drove here in the middle of nowhere, so you could finally open your mouth about what's been bugging you so much?" Ty shook his head. This was just great. "Thanks, Amy…" he sneered and started walking back to the car.

Amy looked his back as it disappeared into the distance and tried to grasp how it made her feel. She felt relieved, she felt free after saying all those things and seeing Ty go away, but at the same time she knew this was far from over. There was so much crap she had to go through before she'd finally be where she wanted to be.


	7. Chapter 7

Ty sat in the car and stared ahead, letting his thoughts settle like a dust. He felt like putting the pedal down and driving away, as far as he could, speeding like those maniacs he had tried to dodge on the road, but he knew he couldn't leave Amy behind. No matter how angry he was at her, he still felt obligated to take care of her, and the blackness that had began to eat his heart was still avoiding the traces of Amy he had forever tattooed on there. His heart was never going to be clean of her and that was what kept him glued on this spot.

It took maybe fifteen minutes before Amy dared to walk back to the car. Her steps were unsure as she got closer, but Ty waiting in the car felt like an invitation to her. Surely he would have already drove off if he didn't want her there.

Opening the door, Ty avoided looking at her. He wasn't sure what would happen if he would. The bitterness was still aching in his chest like an exposed nerve.

"Are you going back…?" Amy asked.

"Yeah…"

His voice was distant, cold even, but that didn't stop Amy from getting in. She wasn't intimidated by him, because she knew that he would never hurt her, no matter how heated the verbal arguments got. Besides, she was covered underneath an invisible armor and there was no way in for Ty when she had made up her mind. Her opinion kept her safe.

"Just tell me this… why did you even want me here? If I'm such a pain to be around, why even bother inviting me here and acting like you care?" Ty's bitter words kept pouring out.

"I didn't know I was going to feel this way until… you got here. Even then, I wasn't sure…" Amy was being honest, feeling like there was nothing to lose anymore.

"But you are now…?"

What she was suggesting felt like a bucket of ice water down his skin, stinging like thousand razors at first, but then leaving him numb.

"I think so…"

"You think or you are?" Ty wanted a clear answer. "No more lies, no more sugar coating, just tell me how it is. I can take it."

Amy looked at him, while he was still looking at anything but her. She wasn't good with words, but Amy knew she had to do better this time. This wasn't the start of an end, that moment was long gone, but this was one of the key moments nonetheless. Something they'd both look back come whatever.

"I feel like it'd best for us… to go separate ways…" Amy said.

There it was. Ty had feared it, even psyched himself up for it, but nothing could have prepared him for this. It wasn't the first time they were down this road, but this time it felt more permanent than ever. Amy was out here, taking over the world and possibly not coming back if she played her cards right. Basically what she was saying was he would no longer be her ball in the chain back in Hudson. Amy wanted to be free from anyone holding her back.

"You don't love me enough to fight?" Ty swallowed dryly. He could tell they had taken different paths somewhere along the way, without knowing it at the time, but right now he had no idea how far she had already gone. Ty had been fooling himself by thinking they were still in love, no matter the distance.

"No. I love you, but that's exactly why I'm doing this", she admitted. The fact that she felt disgusted by his touch had not so much to do with him as it did with her not being honest with him. "I'm just not right for you, I can feel it now. We are so different, we are meant for different things–"

"Oh, so, you're the only one being the judge of that?" He finally looked at her, tears welling in his eyes as the rage began to burn somewhere behind the green shade of them. That amount of fury got Amy's glance locked and she felt imprisoned by his eyes.

"No, but what's the use", she breathed. "If even one of us is feeling like that, then isn't this doomed for good?"

"I thought we were going to fight if that ever happened! Together!"

"I'm done fighting, Ty. If this was meant to be, it wouldn't be this hard. How many times have we had this conversation already? When are we gonna wake up and admit what's staring us right in the eye? Fighting is just avoiding the inevitable, the thing we've tried to shield ourselves from as we've gone round in circles. If these problems were meant to be fixed, they would sort themselves out–"

"Well, hate to break this to you, but nothing just happens, Amy. Not for everyone. I've had to fight for everything I have today, to get where I am, and if I hadn't, I…" he almost lost his voice, trying to explain it to Amy, "I'd be in jail or in some ditch somewhere, dead."

"Wait a minute - you're implying everything has been handed to me on a silver platter?" Amy frowned. "Where have you been all these years if that's what you think?!"

"You're putting words in my mouth - again…"

"I've fought, Ty, I've fought to get here too, you know. But seems like I'm the only one knowing when to stop fighting. Sometimes it's just best to let it go", Amy spoke softer now as she had made up her mind.

"So that's it…?" he whispered. "This is the end for us?" Ty wanted to make it clear so he too would be on top of this just like Amy seemed to be. Amy looked at him and before she even opened her mouth, Ty knew what she was going to say.

"Yeah…" she said and then pulled her ring out. "This is it."

She handed the band back to Ty, to whom it belonged to. Ty stared at her open palm and blinked a tear from his eye.

If Amy had wished the proposal to be one to take her breath away, then them breaking up was doing that too - though not through amazement, but through a punch in the gut.


	8. Chapter 8

Ty waited for one of Ahmed's staff members to let him through the private gates that lead them to the prince's mansion. He felt like a skin filled with nothingness and didn't really register anything around him, except that there was a road, he was driving a car and he was supposed to drive that car to where Ahmed was staying. This was just something he had to get over with - drop Amy off, leave and book a ticket back to Canada. He did it all like a programmed machine, following some sort of survival instinct that had taken over.

They had decided with Amy that he would have the hotel room for himself, while Amy would stay over at Ahmed's, for the time being. She hadn't had the chance to tell him that she had actually been invited to stay over there till the end of the tour and was now thinking of accepting the offer. But in the recent light of events, it seemed insignificant - she was not obligated to him anymore in any way.

When the gates finally opened, they drove along the driveway that was surrounded by nature and wilderness, distracting Amy to think how lush it would all look in the summertime. If everything would go according to a plan, she was here to see it.

As soon as they arrived to the big location where the mansion stood, the building immediately demanded their attention. Amy would have hardly called the remarkable mansion a home and it once again made this all seem like a dream to her. Everything she had knew her life to be up until this point, seemed like a fading memory at the back of her mind. This was what it was all about now. This was her life.

Before Ty had even had a chance to really stop the car, a chauffeur hurried to meet them and helped Amy with the door. She thanked him with a faint smile on her lips, while Ty stepped out and looked around, frowning.

The size of this place was ridiculous to him. He couldn't understand how anyone could even call this a home - there was no heart or soul in this kind of living, it was too sterile to his taste. The tin can he called his household was nothing compared to the mansion with who knows how many bedrooms. Where as there was no privacy at his trailer, one could get lost in this kind of building. Ty found himself looking at Amy's reaction and saw how enchanted she was by all of this. Again, he realized just how comfortable Amy had become with this sort of lifestyle.

Maybe she was right - maybe they were meant for different things.

"Keys, sir", the chauffeur asked with a broken English and Ty handed them to him. "Thank you, sir."

He watched as the man drove away with the car Ahmed had lent them and then brought his glance back at Amy. He felt awkward now with nothing to do; it meant he would had to face her, and Ty wasn't sure what he was expected to say, all while a ring was burning a hole in his pocket.

"So… you think I can get a taxi around here?" Ty half-joked and caught Amy's attention. Her expression dropped from charmed to more apathetic one.

"Don't be ridiculous. This is located less than an hour's drive from downtown. Come inside, Ahmed will arrange someone to drive you back", Amy said and asked him to follow her with a shrug of a shoulder. Ty couldn't help but think how in tune with Ahmed's thoughts Amy seemed to be - like they were the real partners here.

" _Je te vois demain_ ", Ahmed sent off one of his staff members by the touch of his hand and then brought his dark eyes to the couple that had found their way inside the house. They stood in a big hall, in front of a grant staircase. "Amy. Ty. I did not expect you back so soon. Is something the matter? Is the car alright?"

Ty scoffed silently. Of course that's what you suspect first…

"Yes, the car's alright. We just… ended up not going to the vacation after all", Amy danced around their break-up and it immediately caught Ahmed's attention. Amy had always been one with an obvious face and no matter how hard she tried to hide it, the little things gave her away. Ahmed's glance went from Amy to Ty, since his sulking face was something to indicate, too.

"Really?" Ahmed asked, hoping to get more answers to feed his curiosity.

"Yes. Do you think it'd be okay for Ty to get someone to drive him back to the hotel?" Amy said and gestured toward the young man, giving Ahmed another clue: her ring finger no longer had anything shiny on it.

"Just Ty…?" Ahmed lead the conversation on.

"Yes… If it's okay, I'd like to stay here", Amy requested then.

"Of course", Ahmed didn't even have to read between the lines, because the situation began to unfold in front of him with every word left unsaid. "I will arrange the car for you, Ty. Just give me a minute."

Ty nodded stiffly and pursed his lips together, almost unable to keep himself from storming out. He had already witnessed how effortless everything was with Amy and Ahmed, time after time, but now it felt too painful to watch. He had officially lost Amy to this world and there was no coming back.

A little while later, Amy and Ahmed stood at the steps of the mansion, watching as Ty was about to get inside the car. He walked to the other side of the car, but stopped to look at Amy over the hood. She held her breath and stared him with a blank expression, feeling the nausea again. This time it was because she wasn't sure if she was ever going to see Ty again. When she'd return to Hudson, he could be long gone by then. Sure he had school and a job, but if the past was anything to go by, Ty didn't have hard time breaking the ties that bind and just start all over again.

Amy felt a sting of sadness in her chest, but she realized it wasn't really about this moment or him standing there, about to leave. It was more about the memories they had shared and the old self she was leaving behind as soon as Ty would close that door and drive away. But even if it made her a little bit sad, it also made her look toward the future. Some of the best memories could still be ahead.

Ty looked at Ahmed and Amy, but saw nothing but strangers not worthy of his time anymore. He got into the car and pulled the door behind him, giving the driver instructions where to go. As the car took off, Ty knew Amy expected him to look back, but he wasn't going to give her that pleasure. This was something he could never see forgiving and forgetting and not looking back was going to be his statement to Amy.

"You alright?" Ahmed worried when he could see Amy shaking next to him. Her eyes followed the car until it disappeared from the view. Amy's face was frozen and his cheeks looked swollen, like she was holding back a feeling.

"Y-yeah…" she then busied herself by adjusting her fringe behind her ear. "I'm fine."

She realized she had never felt so free, but also so alone.


	9. Chapter 9

A leather jacket, a belt, boots, a laptop and a carry-on. That was it, right?

Ty adjusted his belongings to the bin that carried them through the X-ray, making sure nothing was hanging loosely. He then handed his passport and plane ticket the to the TSA agent.

"Here you go."

Here he was, on his way back home on an early flight, when he could have been on a trip with Amy somewhere in Normandy. No matter how heavy his heart was, at least he felt much better about not being stuck in a situation where every affection Amy was showing him was part of her deceiving act.

"Are your pockets empty, sir?" the agent asked.

"Yea–" Ty was about to reply, until he tugged his hands in them to make sure he was telling the truth and felt the engagement ring on his right side pocket. "No wait. I have this here…" he took it out and looked at it for a second, clenching his jaw and holding back the sickness that grew bigger in his stomach. "I'll just put this in my carry-on, if that's alright?" he checked and the TSA agent nodded.

"About to propose a girl?" an older woman behind Ty asked, putting her belongings through right after him. Ty dropped the ring inside his wallet and glanced at the lady. He didn't have a heart to tell her the harsh reality the engagement ring carried with it or the strength to go through those feelings again in front of a person he didn't even know, so instead Ty just nodded, letting out a little white lie, thinking he'd never see this woman again anyway.

"Perfect timing, eh? With the Valentine's Day coming up and everything", the woman thought and Ty tried to busy himself with closing of his bag to avoid any more eye contact with this friendly traveler.

He had completely forgotten the whole thing; Valentine's Day was this Friday, which meant it was just two days away. He had hoped to spent it here with Amy, but instead he was going back to Canada to his own trailer, back to his loneliness, accompanied with an engagement ring, bitter memories and a rejection.

"Ye-ah…" Ty's voice cracked and he turned to walk through the metal detector. There was no beep and he was free to go gather his items. As he was waiting them to come through, the older lady walked beside him, after having a clear walk as well.

"Good luck. I hope she says yes", she smiled, the crinkles by her eyes getting deeper. Ty looked back and smiled genuinely, wanting to hug this stranger that had so much kindness for him without knowing anything about him, but held himself back.

He missed home, but he was also afraid to go back. Ty wasn't sure if Amy had already broke the news to everyone or if he was supposed to do that instead. His early return would definitely raise some questions and eventually The Bartlett-Flemings were going to hear what had happened, one way or another.

"Thank you… I wish you all the best as well", Ty said gently, putting on his boots and the belt, as the woman returned his smile once more. Then she was on her way with her carry-on and he was alone again.

It got Ty thinking. Some people he met only briefly, but they left some kind of mark on him without even knowing the affect. Eventually he'd forgot their face, but never how they made him feel. Others stayed longer and would never get out of his system either, no matter how much his mind would reject the thoughts of them and how many attempts he was having at moving on. The feelings would fade, but the faces always stayed to haunt him.

Amy had hurt him and he knew there was still so much to say to her, or about the situation altogether, but back there in the car, somewhere by the road, it had already felt like too much to take without the need to push in every thought and feeling he could think of. The break-up was not done and over in that moment. It was not done even now as he was carrying her ring inside his wallet. It was going to a process, a very painful one, and he was going to be haunted by Amy's choice for months, even years on. But he had agreed on those terms and conditions in that moment when he had watched Amy work with Spartan in that course he had built for her years ago. This was going to be the price of loving someone so deeply and purely without any fear of something like this happening.

Yes, he was angry at Amy. But he was also angry at himself for falling in love.

Later that day, Ty stepped out of the taxi in front of his trailer and paid the driver, thanking him before dragging his bag out. He looked around, feeling like everything had become somehow smaller.

The porch was covered in snow and the first thing he had to do was to shovel his way in. Ty knew he had no obligations for days, except for maybe reading but his mind was too distracted for that, so he felt the temptation to be buried under this coat of snow that still kept coming, locking everything else away.

After brewing himself a decent cup of coffee - which was something he had not had in France-, he sat down on his armchair and looked around. A dim light revealed the mess he had left behind and the modest surroundings he called home. Ty couldn't help but think Ahmed's mansion and how Amy was still most likely staying there, enjoying the luxuries and things only a prince could offer. It felt so ridiculous to think him standing next to that woman he had witnessed looking at him back at the mansion as he was getting inside the car. If anyone had seen him beside Amy back there, who could have ever thought of them as a couple? How could he had brought back that woman into this trailer and expect her to feel at home in here.

Few years ago, Caleb and Ashley had come across somewhat similar thing with their living conditions; nobody could have ever expected Ashley, a daughter of Val Stanton, to live in this tin can that was a far cry of her home at Briar Ridge. But compared to Ashley, Amy was in a whole new level. Had Ty not known any better, he could have sworn Amy was some kind of celebrity or a princess, way out of his league.

Had he kid himself by thinking they could've gone back to this after Amy would come back from Europe - or even back to the dream ranch he was still pining for? Had Amy actually done them a favor by not prolonging the inevitable, as she had called it.

How could the girl he had loved turn into a completely different person in the matter of months?

Before, Ty had been stubborn enough to believe people didn't change, but he had, so he could no longer believe they didn't. Especially after witnessing all of this with Amy. Maybe she had not realized how drastic the change was herself, but the person that Ty had let go last December was not the same one he had met in France few months later. So in a way, he had already unknowingly let Amy go for good back then and not yesterday.

Apparently people really did change. And not always for better.


	10. Chapter 10

"Morning, Ahmed. Morning, Lucas."

Dressed on her green team jacket, Amy walked down the aisle of the Ahmed's stable where the prince was giving feedback to her assistant, Lucas. Both men turned their heads, Lucas even looking a little surprised to see the horse trainer present.

"Morning, Amy", Ahmed greeted her with a smile.

"Amy. I thought you were supposed to have two days off?" Lucas looked perplexed, checking if he had misunderstood Ahmed about the situation. The other man didn't notice his concerned eyes.

"I was, but I'm now back at work", Amy shrugged.

"Amy, just because your trip with Ty did not happen, I did not expect you to come back to work right away. You should take those two days off, relax a little. You have earned it", Ahmed suggested.

"And do what? Go crazy in my room?" Amy hummed. "I need to do something."

"Well, alright then. How about we take a ride together? Talk about things. It might be good for the horses to have few days off as well, as you always remind me. Do you agree?" Ahmed seek Amy's approval. She was happy to hear how valued her opinions were.

"I do", Amy nodded. "A ride could be great about now."

"Good. Lucas", Ahmed turned to face the other man, "get Zeus and Ares ready for a ride. Thank you", the prince instructed. Amy was pleased to see how long way he had come - before, he had demanded things, but now he was more gentle with his staff.

"Right away, your highness. Good to see you, Amy", Lucas nodded. Amy smiled and saw the man off with her glance.

"I hope you slept well", Ahmed gestured them to go outside to wait for Lucas and the horses. Amy nodded a little, her styled ponytail swinging in the rhythm of her determined steps.

"Quite okay", Amy said without seeing any further reason to comment why. She had tossed and turned in her bed, thinking everything and still not believing she was now actually a single after so many years of being in a relationship. But this out-of-body-experience kind of feeling wasn't really a new thing to her; lately everything she had done felt out of this world. She wasn't sure if some part of her life was actually a dream - both her past and present felt surreal and she was trying to make sense of it all.

"I hope it was not the bed or the room", Ahmed worried.

"No, not at all. The room was great, thank you", Amy hurried to say. "I'm afraid it's just other things that kept me awake."

"Anything you want to talk about?" Ahmed asked carefully. Amy wasn't sure how much she wanted to confide. But then again, Ahmed was not only her boss but her friend as well.

"This is us being friends now, right?" Amy checked. She didn't want the business and pleasure getting too mixed, even though it was probably too late for that now. But Amy had had hard time getting close to anyone else on the tour - they treated her like she was above them and it created an awkward atmosphere to both parties. With Ahmed, they were more equal and he was willing to help and listen to her whenever she needed - just like a friend.

"Of course", Ahmed assured.

"It's Ty and I. We have… parted ways", Amy confessed. "Thought you should know. But I try not to let it affect my work", she wanted to add. Ahmed looked at her, getting confirmation to his assumptions. The missing ring, Ty sleeping elsewhere and Amy cancelling her plans, it all made sense.

"You are no longer engaged…?" Ahmed checked once more.

"No, I'm not. I broke it off yesterday. That's why I stayed here", Amy explained. "And I was hoping… maybe I could stay here for good now, until the tour ends. It's just closer to work and I suspect the work load will only get more intense within the next months."

"Of course. Whatever you need", Ahmed replied.

"Great. Thanks, Ahmed", Amy felt relieved for getting things sorted.

"Anytime, Amy."

Amy and Ahmed went for a ride on the prince's domain. The landscape was stunning and Amy felt like breathing better again. She had missed this - beautiful scenery, horses… She felt much more like herself on a horse than she did cooped up in her new room.

"The winters here as so much more mellow than in Canada", Amy commented when they rode side by side, the weather being just 9 degrees above zero. "No wonder you were in such a shock when you came to Heartland and we took that trail ride", she laughed at the memory where she had told Ahmed "to cowboy up".

"Do you miss it?" Ahmed asked, feeling happier here where he could actually feel his toes and fingers. He wasn't used to spending winters in such cold climates - even this was too cold for him.

"The weather or Canada?" Amy checked.

"Both", Ahmed looked at her.

"Weather… well, not right now. I do like winter, but it's so long and you kind of get bored with it after a while. And Canada… I don't know. Just feels like another world right now, you know?" Amy looked at Ahmed, giving Aries gentle cues when the horse was dragging his feet.

"I guess so. If you have never been anywhere else than Canada, it can be overwhelming", Ahmed thought. "Which brings me to another question. We have some time between shows here and there. I was thinking we could take side trips. Paris, Rome, maybe even London. What do you think?"

"Oh, actually, I have friends staying in London and Paris", Amy said, thinking how she had kept in contact with Soraya, but they hadn't had time to catch up lately. She wasn't even sure if her best friend knew she was on a tour, things had just gotten so busy with her.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I haven't seen them in a while."

The last she had seen of Mallory was when the girl had been inside an airport shuttle and they had been on top of a small hill, saying their goodbyes through signs that read "GOODBYE MALLORY".

All of a sudden, something Amy had relied on, came crumbling down. She had figured that a foreign surroundings, full of everything new and exciting, would take her mind off of Ty, but here she was, seeing him that leather jacket, holding one of the signs and smiling at her sympathetically after the shuttle had passed them by.

"Amy…?" Ahmed's voice brought her back and shook her from her memories. She turned her head to see if he had actually been talking or if she imagined him calling her name. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah. Yeah, sorry. I just…" she gave her head a shook, but never finished the sentence. "What is it?"

"I was just asking if you would like to go see your friends then?"

"Oh… Uhm. Sure, I mean, if that's okay?" Amy nodded.

"Of course. You are not a prisoner, Amy", Ahmed even tried to joke a little bit, making Amy smile. "I will see when we have time for the trips and let you know, so you can tell your friends."

"Thank you", Amy said.

They continued along the trail and Amy tried to shake the thought of Ty behind her.


	11. Chapter 11

Soft sounds of thumping woke Ty up from his slumber, but as he was too tired to open his eyes, he just pretended to fall right back to sleep by focusing on how much his body and mind really needed this oblivion from the reality, even if it wasn't actually that much of an escape as he wanted it to be. Still, Ty kept hoping that eventually he would be so drained that he'd slip right into something that would resemble a state of unconsciousness.

Caleb Odell opened the door, completely unaware that his best friend was actually back from his trip and hiding underneath every possible cover he had been able to find from this little trailer that Caleb had once called his home. The cowboy stumbled in, shaking snow off from his boots and pant legs, and walked right to the coffee maker in hopes to make himself a warm cup of java.

"Ah, yes please, come to daddy", he mumbled to himself, keeping Ty from his sleep.

Ty had loved it here, in silence and with no one to pester with constant questions, but he knew Caleb's arrival would lead something completely opposite, so he just remained still, pretending not to be there and hoping the other man would soon be on his way.

Since Caleb was his landlord - and a good friend - Ty was okay with him popping in whenever he wanted. Most of the time Caleb called before visiting, so he wouldn't "interrupt anything" - as he always felt inclined to mention -, but now, knowing Ty was supposed to be away, he had not bothered. Not that it would have mattered, since Ty's phone was shut off as he felt like not talking to anyone.

Singing some country song silently while preparing himself a cup of coffee, Caleb stopped mid-sentence all of a sudden. As his back was facing the guy, Ty wasn't sure what had caused his reaction, so he waited, his eyes open now. The silence felt dangerous with two people in the room. Had he turned around, Ty could have witnessed how Caleb took out his baseball bat and swung it gently on his shoulder, all prepared to use it if the intruder - that he thought Ty to be - would not play nice.

Caleb stretched the bat forward and poked the big pile of covers. Maybe it's just laundry, he thought. It wasn't uncommon for this place to be unorganized - it had always been that way and it had not changed even though the person living under the roof had.

"What are you doing…?" Ty finally asked when he felt something hard against his back. His voice startled Caleb.

"Holy shit, Borden! I thought you were some wayfarer who had found a place to crash", he let the bat fall and sighed out of a relief. "I could have smash your head or something - what the hell are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in France?" Caleb frowned.

"Not really…" Ty slowly crept out under the covers, peeling the layers off of him.

"Not really?" Caleb echoed. "But I thought you were going to go and see Amy. It was this week, right?"

"It was. And I was there already. But I came back", Ty shrugged and shed off few more blankets. Caleb stared at him, waiting for a longer reply. But when there wasn't one, he cocked his eyebrow.

"You okay, man? You look like hell."

"Not really…" Ty groaned and rubbed his face with two hands, adjusting himself into a sitting position. The chilly air quickly made him shiver and he wrapped his arms across his chest.

Ty had no idea how long he had been sleeping, but it had hardly felt like resting anyway. In fact, his brain had revisited every moment from his trip, finding alternative ways to handle every possible situation. The endless maybes had lead him nowhere, because there was no rewind button in real life and there was no knowing if any of those solutions had actually worked. But they kept replaying in his head on a constant loop, leaving no space for blankness. There was one thing he had notice though: his solution was part of his problem. The more he had tried to go to Amy, the more they had fallen apart. So, he had done everything and still lost her. But then again, anything else would have not felt right to him. It was like he was punished and mocked for loving Amy with his whole heart.

"What happened? Is Amy okay?" Caleb asked and put the baseball bat away. Nothing ever phased Ty as much as Amy. He looked like crap after every night shift or all-nighter, but this was more profound. And since he was back from France early, something must have happened with her, Caleb figured.

"I guess. Wouldn't know", Ty mumbled.

"You guess? You don't know?" Caled repeated. "That doesn't sound like you. When I last saw you, all you could talk about was her and seeing her again. Now it seems like you're not even interested–"

"The engagement's off, okay?"

He had been here before with Caleb: first in the loft about three years ago, now here, in this heartbreak hotel. While it had been a shock on both times, this time felt different. Ty felt ashamed to admit it and he would never say it to Caleb, but he had thought that while Amy was wearing his ring, it would have made her think twice before making any rash decisions.

But apparently not.

"You… split…up?" Caleb stared at his best friend, not believing what he was hearing. Ty nodded. "But I thought things were okay?"

"That makes two of us…" Ty got up and walked to get himself a cup. He didn't feel like going back to sleep anymore, not that he even could with Caleb here, so he might just as well try being awake.

"What happened?" Caleb wanted to know.

"One moment we were good, the next…" Ty shrugged.

"Surely something else went down, too. What about that prince guy…?" Caleb had already voiced his suspicions about Ahmed earlier, but Ty had refused to hear it. It would have been easy to blame the prince and boy, did he really want to, but Ty knew Amy to be a stubborn kind and if she didn't want to change, she choose not to. So, some of it had to origin from her, even if Ahmed had been the one providing her the playground.

"I don't know", Ty said. "Look, if it's okay, I don't really wanna talk about this."

"But what are you gonna do?" Caleb ignored his request. "You were supposed to get married. Maybe this is just temporary - you know, maybe Amy comes back and you'll be fine again."

"Is that what you kept telling yourself when you came back from Italy?" Ty asked. It shut Caleb up, but he tried to act like it didn't still hurt. Ty felt bad for saying about it and seeing the pain on his face, but the scenarios were so similar it almost scared him. "Look what happened to you and Ash."

"But you guys are different."

"How?" Everyone always told him that, but Ty failed to see it now.

"I don't know, you just are", was the best argument Caleb could come up with. "You and Amy fight, but you always get back together. It's like the reset–"

"I swear to god, if you say that thing about your reset button, I will punch you", Ty didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to keep any hope alive about this ending well, because it was only going to hurt more when it didn't. "There is one thing Amy said that might actually make some sense. And it's kind of what you said, too. We keep doing this again and again: we fight, we split up, we get back together. How do we expect the end to change when we keep making the same mistakes again."

"What mistakes?" Caleb asked.

"I don't know. I guess I just always felt like…" Ty took some time to think about it, "we said we'd change and for a while we acted like we did, but eventually we'd always steer ourselves back to where we were and pretended like it was somehow different. That it would not cause problems, because we had already been over that… And we got careful around it, but eventually it would come out…" Ty felt a burn in his heart and turned to face the coffee maker, so Caleb wouldn't see the tears welling in his eye. Damn it, he didn't want to cry!

"Okay, man", Caleb said, walked next to him and placed his hand on his opposite shoulder. "Listen. You might think you need that coffee, but forget about it", he switched the maker off. "You're gonna need something stronger than that. It's on me - since I can actually pay for real this time", he tried to crack a joke about their financial situation that had improved a lot since the Futurity Race. Before, Ty was always the one paying. "I don't wanna hear any arguments. When you're heartbroken just repeat this mantra: with booze you never loose. Trust me."


	12. Chapter 12

The nights at Heartland were usually quiet, so quiet you could probably hear a pin drop if you really paid attention. So when Lou's cellphone rang unexpectedly that night, she was quick to grab it into her hand and answer, because if she would just let it ring as she'd slowly wake up, Lou would not hear the end of it the following morning.

"Hello…? Amy…?" she assumed since the rest of her family was under the same roof and no one else besides family would call her at this hour. Lou rubbed her eyes, trying to locate her alarm clock to see what the time difference was between Alberta and France. Amy usually didn't call this late, but maybe it was an emergency.

"Hey, it's actually me, Caleb…" An unsure voice from the other end said.

"Caleb? What- why are you calling me in the middle of the night?" Lou sighed, letting out all the tension that she had been building up while waiting for "Amy" to tell her some bad news.

"I kinda have a favor to ask", he slurred at the other end.

"And this can't wait till tomorrow…? I was kind of in the middle of sleeping", Lou's voice became strained. She could tell Caleb had been drinking, so maybe this was his idea of a prank call. She seriously hoped he wasn't still carrying a torch for her after they had shared that one weird kiss a year ago.

"Well, not really… See, me and Ty need a ride", Caleb explained.

"Wait, Ty? How drunk are you?" Lou frowned. "Ty's in France."

"Not anymore…" Caleb let the cat out of the bag. Lou wasn't sure what Caleb was on about, but she was trying to focus one task at a time.

"Why don't you get a taxi?" she wasn't too happy to get dressed, drive all the way to wherever Caleb was and then make sure he would get home safely.

"I would, but I lost my wallet…"

Lou sighed and touched the bridge of her nose, trying not to snap at Caleb about how irresponsible he was and how she was not his designated driver.

"Okay, I'm coming. But this is the first and the last time you'll ever get to ask me this", Lou wanted to stress it. "And - you will owe me."

"Alright, alright. Just get us out of here- please", he added the last word quickly, trying to soften the deal by not forgetting his manners.

"Fine. Where are you?" Lou asked.

"Outside the bar, near Maggie's", Caleb gave her the instructions.

"Okay, I'll be there. Don't freeze to death", she couldn't help but worry even if she was mad at him. "Bye."

"What was that…?" Peter nuzzled closer and wrapped his arm around Lou. She looked over her shoulder, sighing. The temptation of the warm bed and her husband's embrace was difficult to resist, but she was a woman of her word and couldn't let Caleb down.

"It was Caleb. I need to pick him up. He's drunk", Lou carefully removed Peter's hand and stood up, thinking what the temperature outside was and how much many layers of clothes would she need. Peter rolled back on the bed, pulling the cover up.

"Can't he just take a taxi?" Peter wondered.

"That's what I said, but he's lost his wallet…" Lou got into her jeans and pulled a warm sweater over her night top. She couldn't stop thinking about Caleb mentioning Ty. He wasn't supposed to come back until weekend, so was Caleb just talking nonsense or had her future brother-in-law really returned to Hudson early?

As soon as she arrived to the bar, Lou witnessed Caleb holding Ty on his feet and wrapping his arm tighter around his neck in order to help his passed out friend into the car. Lou's jaw dropped as she couldn't believe what she was seeing. The cowboy opened the back door and Lou stretched back to talk to him.

"I didn't realize to take Katie's car seat away, so…"

"It's alright, I got it", Caleb assured and helped Ty with his seat belt, hoping it was enough to keep him in a sitting position. The street was dark and only the neon-lights shed some light inside the truck, but Lou could see it really was Ty.

"Is he even conscious? Should I worry…?" she asked, worrying already.

"He's breathing, so let's just get him back to the trailer. I'll take it from there", Caleb said and slammed the backdoor shut, then getting into the front seat. "Okay, let's go."

Lou checked Ty from the rear view mirror and then headed out from the town.

"What happened? Why is he here?" Lou whispered, even though Ty was probably pretty out of it.

"It has something to do with Amy. You got any idea what's going on?" Caleb asked. Lou was usually up to date about everything that involved Amy. The sisters were close and shared almost everything, so Caleb figured maybe Lou was better at telling him everything than Ty was.

"What? No. He didn't tell you?" Lou was almost shocked to discover things had gotten somehow so bad that Ty had had to come home and get himself drunk. It had been days since she had talked to Amy, but Lou had thought the silence had meant they were having such a good time with Ty and were too busy with each other to contact anyone. She had been waiting for Ty to come back, so she could ask him about the trip and how Amy was doing in Europe. But right now, he was in no condition to talk.

"Only that they broke up", Caleb shrugged.

"Br-broke up?" Lou echoed, trying not to drive off the road. "That's insane! That can't be true! Right…?"

"That's what I was thinking. But the longer I spent time with him in the bar and the more he ordered those shots, the clearer it became to me: they really have broke it off - for good. He has her ring and everything."

"But… what happened? This has got to be some kind of misunderstanding…" Lou shook her head. "They are happy. Or were. How can it change so fast?"

"Thought you and I should both know it can", Caleb commented.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lou felt her annoyance creeping back. Was Caleb really suggesting what she thought he was suggesting?

"Well, me and Ash, you and Peter. We've both seen how difficult marriage can be", Caleb thought. "Why not being engaged too." Lou felt vexed.

"Okay, Caleb, let's get something clear", she had her accusing finger up. "The things I once told you about me and Peter were told you confidentially in the moment of weakness and when I confided to you - which I shouldn't have done, I realize it now - I didn't think you were going to use them against me someday. Especially when I'm picking you up from a bar! So you could at least show some respect and not talk about me and Peter like that - or I will leave you on the side of this road!" Lou threatened.

"Relax, Lou. I wasn't implying anything, just saying that Ty and Amy did not have it easy either. The long distance, wedding plans and that snobby prince–"

"Hold on - what about the prince? Is this because of him?" Lou had to ask. "I knew it! I told Amy to be careful, I could see it in him. There was just something about the way he looked at her… I knew he would only cause problems–"

"Lou", Caleb tried to interfere. "I get where you're coming from, that's exactly what I thought too, but Ty said that it was… something else. Something about Amy. She was different."

"Different? Different how?"

"I don't know. Distant, I guess. Preoccupied with her work, or something."

"Well, as soon as he sobers up, I'm going to have a talk with him", Lou glanced at Ty using the mirror again. "And Amy will have to explain herself too. They can't just split up. Not now. Not after everything…"


	13. Chapter 13

"When you told me we were going to go see a Wild West show, I thought there would be cowboys and horses - not mouses", Ahmed said as he helped Amy to get seated in the VIP lounge. Amy looked the arena through the glass and giggled at Ahmed's comment. She took a seat, thanking him silently.

"Well, Mickey is part of the performance. It's Disneyland after all - Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show would be nothing without Mickey being there", Amy said and watched as the prince sat next to him. He looked confused.

"Mickey…?" Ahmed asked. "Is that the mouse?"

"Yeah. – Come on, you know Mickey, right?" Amy touched his arm gently, finding it amusing how stiff Ahmed looked in this environment. Everyone else in the crowd below were wearing mouse ears and impatiently waiting to see the characters. They all knew they were going to have a good time - but here was Ahmed, terrified about what was to come.

"I have never heard of him in my life. How are we supposed to see him all the way from here? I thought I got us the best seats possible, but if a mouse runs through the arena, there is no way we can see it without binoculars", Ahmed said and Amy had to check if he was being serious. Seemed like it. She wanted to laugh, but it would've probably be considered rude.

"You don't know who Mickey Mouse is…?" Amy asked. Ahmed shook his head a little. "Only the most famous mouse in the world!"

"Mouses are not my business", Ahmed said.

"It's mice", Amy had to correct him. Ahmed looked confused. "The plural of a mouse - it's mice."

Ahmed seemed even more anxious and uncomfortable. Amy was observing him, trying to figure out what was causing it. This was supposed to be fun, for both of them. Amy had never been to Disneyland, and she had never thought about going either, because the place was always too expensive for their holiday budgets or too far away, but with the prince's help, they were able to get the best kind of treatment one could imagine. So, their first time in Disneyland couldn't get any better than this.

Except, for Ahmed it probably could.

"Why are you so nervous? Just try to relax. If you're worried about your horses, they can wait - no, actually, they will wait. We have time to just enjoy ourselves for once", Amy said.

"I just…" Ahmed clenched his jaw, "I feel lost."

"Lost?"

"I do not know anything about this place. Why these people come here to see mous— mice", he corrected himself before Amy could. He was even insecure about the way he spoke.

"It's a cartoon character", Amy explained, since it seemed like Ahmed hadn't realized it yet. The expression on his face changed.

"Cartoon…? Animated?" Ahmed checked. Amy nodded. "Oh… I feel so stupid now. What must you think of me", he blushed out of embarrassment, trying to hide his face. Ahmed figured this needed explaining. "Where I grew up, we did not watch television, there was no time for that. We entertained ourselves with other things."

"Well, it's never too late to get to know this world", Amy spoke softly. "We might be adults, but adults can love the magical world of animation too, right?"

"I suppose so", Ahmed nodded stiffly.

"And what better way than this", Amy said. "You might think you've seen horses perform, but never like this, I'm sure."

And as soon as she had said it, the lights dimmed and the Wild West Show was about to begin.

"That was incredible!" Ahmed cheered as they left the lounge after the show. "I was truly entertained! The tricks, the horses, the people, even the mouse - astonishing!"

"See? I told you!" Amy couldn't help but smile at how happy Ahmed was about this. Something about the way he was just beginning to explore the world that Amy took for granted gave her immense amount of joy. Ahmed was acting like a little kid, learning something new every day - and in a way he was: he had been brought up in an environment where he had not been allowed to be a child. As soon as he could walk, they had considered him a small adult. People had expectations when it came to royalties and from the very young age, Ahmed had been taught to fulfill those expectations. Amy was happy to be there for him now, guiding him through all the things he could have had had he been "just a normal kid".

"Amy…" Ahmed stopped and gently turned her to face him. "I want to thank you. You have given me so many new experiences, things that are not in my… how do you say - comfort zone. I feel more liberated, like a completely different person."

Amy was flattered by his words and even blushed a little. Shifting the attention from her, she had something to say too.

"It's been good for me as well. Which is why I want to thank you too. I could have never had these experiences back home or even dreamt about doing all of this if it wasn't for you. I don't know how I could ever repay this", Amy said.

"You do not have to pay me. You already help me with my horses - and with my feelings too", Ahmed spoke. His face turned from delighted to much more serious one, but they were then interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Amy! I can't believe you really made it!"

Amy turned to look on her right, as Ahmed dropped his hands down from her arms, and noticed an old friend standing just few feet away.

"Mallory!" Amy rushed to hug her. They embraced each other and Ahmed was left waiting on the side. "It's so good to see you!"

"It's good to see you too… Wow, you look amazing!" the younger woman admired Amy from head to toe. "The clothes, your hair - what happened to you!" Mallory was stunned.

"Thanks, Mallory. You look great too", Amy complimented her. "I have to say, I wasn't aware you were in Disneyland. When you said you were part of a Wild West Show, I thought it was–"

"Different? Yeah, I know", Mallory completed her sentence, nodding knowingly. She had heard this before. "I didn't know it was going to be like this either, but it's not bad. Like I said, it's different."

"Good different, I hope…?" Amy was sensing something in Mallory's voice.

"Let's just put it like this: Disney movies have not been the same ever since I saw Mickey taking his head off to have a lunch", Mallory explained and made Amy laugh.

"But you're still with Jake, right?" Amy checked.

"Yeah, of course", Mallory smiled gently. "Things are good with him, so it's worth the Mickey traumas and all. Anyway - how you've been? What's new? Tell me everything!" she insisted.

"Well, like I told you in the text message earlier, I'm touring here in Europe", Amy said, trying to think what she could possibly tell to Mallory and what she would even find interesting. She couldn't remember what had already happened before Mallory and Jake had left to France last spring - the whole year had been such a rush.

"So you've really upped your game, huh", Mallory was amazed. "You traveling alone?"

"Not really. In fact", she turned to Ahmed, "Ahmed, why don't you come and introduce yourself." Amy ushered him with her hand. The prince walked closer, smiling nervously. He was fine with giving orders to his peers, but his people skills still needed some work.

"Wait a minute - don't I know you?" Mallory asked. "He looks familiar - why does he look familiar?" she talked to Amy almost like Ahmed wasn't in the room at all.

"This is Ahmed. Prince Ahmed Al Saeed", Amy corrected herself this time. Mallory's jaw dropped.

"Prince… The prince?" Mallory checked.

"Yes, the prince", Amy was hoping Mallory would know this wasn't the time to let anything indiscreet out of her mouth. She knew what Ahmed's reputation was - or had been - back when Mallory had still been around. But he had changed a lot since then and Amy was hoping to prove it. "He is my boss now."

"Please, Amy, there is much more to us than just the working relationship", Ahmed said and greeted Mallory with a handshake. He was however looking at Amy - just like Mallory was -, but while Ahmed looked more pleasant, Mallory looked almost horrified. The younger woman wasn't sure how to interpret his words, because to her it looked like she wasn't the only one dealing with a change: Amy could have been a princess as far as she was concerned. The way she dressed and carried herself wasn't like her at all. And what Ahmed had just said about them, made Mallory even more confused.

"You mean…?" Mallory didn't want to assume anything out loud until someone would say something further.

"We are friends as well", Ahmed said, not even realizing the weird tension that was hovering in the air. "It is strange for me - I have never befriend someone I work with."

"Yeah, that's right. We are friends", Amy nodded, feeling relieved as soon as the prince had established that. She wasn't blind, though - something about the way Mallory looked at her made her see how the suspicions were starting to grow in her little head. Mallory had always been somewhat invested in everyone's relationships, to say the least.

"And Ty…?" Mallory wanted to make sure she was getting this right.

"Uhm…" Amy could feel herself choking up. Being aware how much Mallory had always thought of her and Ty as the perfect couple, she felt terrible for being the one who would eventually have to break her the news. Not only was Ahmed listening to their personal conversation, but Mallory would surely make a scene as soon as she'd heard the engagement was off. "I'll tell you all about it later, if that's okay?"

"Sure…" Mallory nodded, but gave Ahmed a subtle stink eye. Something didn't sit right here.


	14. Chapter 14

"Amy, this is like the fifth message I've left you. Call me as soon as you get this", Lou spoke to the phone intensely and then ended the call. She was doing house chores, but couldn't stop thinking about Ty and Amy, which resulted to her calling Amy between washing dishes, folding laundry and vacuuming. So far, there had been no answer to any of her calls - or texts.

Jack entered the house, screen door slamming shut behind him, and removed his hat, then glancing at Lou who was putting the phone back to its holder. It was just another day at the ranch: chores to do, horses to take care of and people to miss. Georgie was in school when she wasn't busy with her hobbies, Lisa was in Florida doing business and Amy in France touring successfully. The ones left behind were him, Lou, Peter and Katie. Even with a toddler (and occasional teenager) in the house, it had never been this quiet.

"What was that about?" Jack asked, looking around in hopes of finding a prepared meal by now. He had been doing ranch work since the crack of dawn and around this time was when he usually craved for lunch.

"Nothing", Lou responded, trying to get back to paying bills. She sat on her laptop, but couldn't focus on the numbers and letters.

"No lunch?" Jack asked.

"There are left-overs in the fridge from last night", Lou commented absentmindedly. Jack could tell something was keeping her distracted - and he bet he knew what it was.

"Where did you go last night?" Jack asked and examined the insides of the fridge, glancing at Lou every now and then. He had appreciated Lou's efforts to be quiet while getting through the living room and kitchen all the way to her truck, but she had still underestimated his hearing: just because he didn't always reply to people, didn't mean he had a lousy hearing - he was just selective about what he wanted to hear and he had been very good at playing that card all these years. Sneaking in and out where one of the things he could hear loud and clear.

"Oh… that…" Lou didn't know what to say. She wanted to tell her grandfather about Ty and Amy, but she wasn't sure what there was to tell. Lou was not one to keep things inside - if she was, people could tell something was off immediately - but right now she had hard time knowing what exactly it was that she was keeping from everyone. Only one thing she knew for sure.

"Promise me you will take it easy", Lou had to soften things a bit.

"Depends why you're asking me that…" Jack's wrinkles grew deeper when he started to get more suspicious. He didn't like the sound of this: nothing good ever came out when someone told him to take it easy.

"Caleb called me last night. He wanted me to pick him up from a bar", Lou started telling the story of last night. Jack scoffed.

"Is this the part where I'm supposed to act all surprised?" Jack murmured and took out a bowl of lasagna.

"Well, no. But he wasn't alone. Ty was with him", Lou said, holding her breath a little while waiting for his reaction. Jack placed the food on the table and looked at Lou, wondering if his hearing might have been not so good after all.

"Ty…?" Jack repeated. Lou nodded carefully. "Now, why would Ty be here when he's supposed to be in France with Amy?

"Great question. That's exactly what I've been wondering myself. According to Caleb, Ty and Amy are having some difficulties. She even gave back the engagement ring. It sounds serious, Grandpa", Lou went on.

"Sure does…" Jack agreed.

"I was thinking of going back to his trailer and ask him what's going on, especially since I haven't been able to get through to Amy, maybe knock in some sense, reason with him", Lou already mapped out her plan. "But now, since you know too, I have even a better idea: why don't we go together? Have a little talk, find out what's going on?"

"Lou… Why would we interfere with anything that's going on with them", Jack was reluctant to go through with Lou's ideas. "Ty and Amy are both adults. I'm sure it'll work itself out. It's not like this is the first time they've had a disagreement."

"But what if it's not just about them?" Lou then said. "What if… there's something else?"

"Such as…?" Jack wasn't sure if he wanted to hear this, but seeing his granddaughter's distress made him ask anyway.

"What if it's the prince? I feel like he might be stealing Amy away from Ty. Maybe you didn't see it back here, but I did. And now, it all makes perfect sense to me - Ahmed has had time to cast a spell on her and Ty comes back with the ring…" she was shaking her head. It was obvious. "Amy would never give back the ring if there wasn't a good enough reason for that. I know my sister - I know how much she wanted Ty to propose her."

"You really think that's what's going on?" Jack frowned.

"Yeah, I do! Caleb said something about Amy being all different - well, of course she is if she's spending time with that jerk of a prince!" Lou was getting upset. "Ty needs to know that she's better off with him and not with Ahmed! You know Ty, Grandpa, he's so insecure about himself. What he needs is a little push forward and you know the way to do it. If we'd go together, I could vouch for Amy and you could talk to Ty. You guys have that bond."

"I suppose it wouldn't hurt to know if he's alright…" Jack wasn't sure about Lou's theory, but he was worried about Ty. The young man was like a son to him.

"Great!" Lou already felt like they were winning. "Let me get that lasagna for you", she jumped up from her chair and took the bowl out of his hands, all of a sudden full of energy.

"Peter?" Lou walked into the barn office. Her husband was working on his laptop, trying to take care of things while knowing he was supposed to be in Vancouver instead of Hudson. The barn office was the quietest place he could find from the ranch at this hour, and it said a lot, after he'd found horses were actually not that quiet as he had always thought them to be. There had been few times he had had a Skype call with an important client and one of the horses had sounded like he was auditioning for the next Canadian Idol.

Peter really loved being with his family, but what they didn't realize was that he couldn't deal with the constant interruptions because he wasn't some sort of freelancer - picking up work when he felt like it or had time for it - he had a schedule he had to follow along with the people in Vancouver.

"Yeah?" Peter lifted his eyes from the screen. "What is it?"

"Could you watch Katie for me? Grandpa and I have something we have to do", Lou leaned against the doorway. Peter checked the time and his calendar.

"Yeah, I guess I could", Peter shrugged. "I suppose I could have lunch too."

"Great. Thanks", Lou said and turned around, but before stepping any further, she turned right back. "It won't take long."

"Yeah, it's fine. I'm just about ready with this thing anyway, so…" Peter saved everything he had been working on, closed his laptop and then walked to the door.

"You know I love you, right?" Lou had to make sure. Peter frowned and laughed a little.

"Where is this coming from…?" Peter was surprised. Not that he had minded these random declarations, but these days they were so rare that it always made him feel like there was something going on to make Lou confess that.

"Just… felt like saying it", Lou shrugged. She almost wanted to kiss him, but it might have felt like too much.

"Well, I love you too, honey", Peter returned to her words. It made Lou smile.

"We'll be right back. Katie's already eaten. She's playing in her room. You two have fun", she walked out with him.

"Okay. Drive safely", Peter brushed Lou's back with his hand before she walked to the truck where Jack was already seated behind the wheel.

"We will. Bye."

Lou climbed inside, still lost in the moment.

"Grandpa, how often do you say you love her to Lisa?" Lou asked.

"Every day", Jack said, without any hesitation or shame whatsoever. "Ever since she taught me to text, it's the first and last thing I tell her every morning and every night."

"Huh…" Lou hummed. She had to admit they had been lacking in that department with Peter. Maybe it was something they needed to work on. It was that damn Caleb's fault for making her see her marriage through someone else's eyes…


	15. Chapter 15

"There's our kitchen, that's our bedroom. If you need a toilet, we also have one of those as well, and here's the living room", Mallory showed Amy around and did a little twirl in the middle of the room. "That's pretty much it", she ended the tour, putting her hands in her pockets. Amy's eyes traveled curiously around the room. There was a brief moment of silence when Mallory expected Amy to say something and Amy on the other hand was trying to find a way to express her thought.

"Wow… it's rather small…" Amy commented. In fact, she had never seen an apartment this small. The place was beautiful, in its own way, but Amy couldn't imagine herself living like this. She was so used to wide open spaces that this would merely feel like a place to store one's things.

"I guess French apartments are. And crazy expensive too", Mallory rolled her eyes. It was a good thing Jake made a decent paycheck or they wouldn't have even afforded to live like this. But the down side of that paycheck was that Jake was hardly ever around. Mallory mostly saw him at work, during nights and on his days off. The little cowboy was making other things too on the side of his Disney job, but they always tried to make sure they had time for each other as well - otherwise they would only be roommates and not a couple. This was their first apartment, and Mallory couldn't think a better person to share it with than Jake.

"Yeah, probably…"

"But you don't have that problem anymore, do you?" Mallory couldn't help but test Amy. She brought her eyes from the apartment to Mallory. "I mean, this tour gig must pay well; those clothes are designer, right?"

"It's not a gig, Mallory", Amy corrected, feeling offended. "It's a job, serious business. I'm not here to have fun, I've been working my butt off ever since I came here. It's not until now that I've had few days off."

"Do you like it?" Mallory quizzed. "The job, I mean."

"I love it", Amy assured, feeling challenged. It didn't scare her.

"And the prince? He's a good guy now?"

"He's never been a bad guy", Amy felt her annoyance taking over. "People just misunderstood him. Even I did."

"Okay", Mallory let it be - for now. "If you say so."

"I am", Amy stared her straight in the eye, not even blinking because she had to get her point across. No one had been very welcoming of Ahmed and Amy almost felt embarrassed about it for them. The way they acted around him was not a way to treat someone who had a different cultural background. Just because his ways were unfamiliar, didn't mean they were bad or a subject of a joke.

Mallory blinked, ending the eye contact, and moved closer to the kitchen.

"You want tea?" She figured it might help them to cool things off a little.

"Sure…" Amy tried to shake off the feeling that Mallory was accusing her about something. Maybe Mallory was jealous about the things she had; living in a place like this, it was no wonder.

The younger woman then disappeared into the kitchen and Amy decided to check her phone. Five new calls, three texts - all from Lou. Amy listened the voice mails through.

"Amy, call me, we need to talk!"

"Amy, why is Ty back at Hudson? Call me!"

"What's going on? Have you fallen off from the edge of the Earth? Get back to me as soon as possible."

"Come on, Amy! Stop ignoring me!"

"Amy, this is like the fifth message I've left you. Call me as soon as you get this."

Amy could tell Lou's curiosity and frustration were growing bigger with every message left. She sighed and skimmed through the texts. They were about the same thing, only on a written form. Amy knew this would happen, sooner or later, but she was not ready for it now.

One neurotic person at a time, Amy decided.

"Need any help in the kitchen?" Amy offered.

"No. No, it's fine", Mallory assured her. "So… about Ty. What was it that you wanted to tell me?" she used this opportunity to pry more about her favorite couple. "The last I heard, you two were thinking of buying that ranch."

Unnerving feeling settled in Amy.

"Yeah… That was a while ago…" she thought. The last thing she wanted to talk about right now was Ty, but of course she knew Mallory couldn't leave it be. She had always put her nose where it didn't belong.

"It hasn't even been a year. I wouldn't consider that a while", Mallory stated and came back with two mugs of tea. "So, did you get the place?"

Amy took the cup from Mallory's extended hand and inhaled, building up courage to tell her about the recent changes in her and Ty's relationship.

"No", she answered first, shaking her head. "We didn't get the place. Or more like… we haven't gotten it. Nor do we will." They had been talking about getting the ranch with Ty around the time of the Futurity Race, but had then decided they would wait until things got a bit clearer. That time had never come.

"What happened? Someone else got it before you guys?" Mallory gestured Amy to sit down. Amy took a seat, wondering how else could she really answer to her than using the kind of bluntness that Mallory often did.

"Me and Ty… are no longer together", Amy finally let out.

"Come again…?" Mallory tilted her head.

"We broke it off, well, I broke it off", Amy continued.

"But why? Things were going so well…" Mallory wrapped her hands around the mug, saddened by the news.

"What makes you say that?"

Amy didn't like the way Mallory suggested she had more insight about their relationship than her - especially since they had not been in contact with each other for months. So many things had happened since then, for example her accident. Amy bet Mallory had no idea about that either.

"You were engaged. Isn't that usually a good sign?" Mallory was confused.

"It's not so simple. Being engaged isn't some kind of remedy to everything, it's just this step forward, but other than that, things are the same. Couples can still have hard time even if they are engaged. It's just a ring around your finger after all, not a magical force-field." Amy took a sip from the mug.

"Just a ring around your finger…? Amy, are you hearing yourself?" Mallory couldn't believe this was the same Amy that had been so worried about her misplaced ring. There had to more to this than Amy let out.

"Okay, you know what", Amy put down her mug on the table. "I don't feel comfortable talking about this with you. Whatever happened with me and Ty is no one else's business. I don't have to explain myself to you - or anyone else."

"Maybe, but just hear me out: if this has anything to do with this… tour and the prince, I think you made a mistake. Yeah, I may not know the prince and I may not know how much this work requires from you, but we've known each other since I was just a baby. I know you, Amy, and this… whatever this is", she gestured Amy's clothes, "this isn't you."

"So what? Am I supposed to get your approval for things I choose to do?" Amy asked and stood up. "I'm not allowed to change or improve myself?"

"You are, but… this… this is a joke!" Mallory got up too. "You've never been about fashion, you could care less about styling your hair or this much make-up. Even the way you talk is weird. I'm standing here and wondering whatever happened to that Amy I used to call a friend."

"Well, she changed. She grew up. Maybe you should too", Amy shot back.

"Right now it seems she's acting like a brat", Mallory gave her honest opinion. "I used to look up to you, you were my role model. Amy, you don't have to change for anybody. You were good the way you were. You don't have to impress anyone, they don't call you Miracle Girl for nothing. If you're doing this for the prince, forget about him, forget about this job, it's not worth losing yourself", Mallory adviced. "I don't know what happened with Ty, but he loved you as you were. What could be more beautiful than that."

"You're right. You don't know what happened with Ty. And like I said, it's really none of your business", Amy said and took her handbag. Mallory shook her head. Even the handbag didn't fit with the image she had of Amy: back at the ranch, everything she could ever need always fit in her pocket - or alternatively in her saddlebag.

"Amy…" Mallory tried, sighing, but she was already out the door.


	16. Chapter 16

"Good morning", Caleb said when Ty finally got up from the bed, holding his head in pain. The cowboy was brewing coffee which made Ty grunt out of disgust: the smell was horrible and didn't help with his nausea. "Or should I say morning, since it seems you're not having a very good one."

"Why did I let you talk me into going to a bar…"

Ty let his brain settle for a second.

"It helped, didn't it?" Caleb grinned, feeling like he was some kind of Einstein with his solution for heartbreaks.

"No, Caleb. It didn't help at all. It only made things worse… Now I have this stupid headache to deal with on top of everything."

"You want some water? Painkillers?"

"Yes, please…" Ty sighed and wrapped his blanket tighter around his shoulders. "That was the last time I will do that for a girl. It's never led anywhere good. I gotta get a grip…" His mouth tasted like something he had once shoveled at Heartland.

"Relax, man. Just because you had one drunken night out doesn't mean it's the end of the world", Caleb said and brought him the glass of water and a pill to help him with his headache. "We've all done that for a girl sometime."

"No, but it shouldn't be like that. Every time I've had problems, not just relationship problems, I've felt like drinking. Maybe it's my genes or just my stupidity, but it stops now - no more alcohol. I need to focus on something productive. I should call Scott, tell him I can make a shift tomorrow", Ty kept going on, feeling frustrated with himself.

"What's the rush? Take a day off, study or whatever it is that you do with your spare time", Caleb worried. Ty swallowed down the pill and drank his water, then setting the glass on the side table, right next to the photo frame that had a picture of him and Amy at the loft. Ty turned it down, against the surface.

"I'll think about it. But it doesn't do any good for me to be cooped up in this trailer", he said and looked around with his bloodshot eyes. Everything about the place reminded him of Amy and it was exactly the opposite thing he wanted to be focusing on right now.

There was a knock. Caleb walked to the door and opened it, finding Lou and Jack standing at the porch. This wouldn't please Ty, he knew.

"Come on in", Caleb said anyway, stepping back inside the trailer. The people from Heartland walked in, looking around. Lou wrinkled her nose - the place smelled like a bar. Jack's eyes immediately fixed on Ty who was still sitting at the bed.

Ty sighed, closing his eyes when he saw the visitors. He had been trying to avoid Lou and Jack since coming back, but apparently it was some kind of law to have them come to him if he didn't go to them. The only thing missing now was Tim.

"So, it's true what they say: you are back home", Jack stated.

"Great. This is exactly what I need right now; a lecture", Ty uttered.

"We're not here to lecture you, we are here to help you", Lou corrected.

"How?" Ty was pessimistic about the way Jack and Lou could possible help him in this situation. He didn't need anyone's help. The only person who could help him now was he himself - and that was exactly what he was about to do.

"Is it true? You and Amy are no longer together?" was the first thing Lou wanted to know before going any further. She was trying to hold back her tongue, but she needed to know if Caleb had been telling her facts or lies.

"It's true", Ty confirmed, hoping that would be the end of it, but he should've known better by now; it was just exactly what Lou needed to fuel the fire.

"You okay?" Jack wanted to know. Ty sighed and shrugged. He didn't know what he was, other than sick of this already.

"Is it the prince? I bet it is. Ty, you gotta give yourself more valuation. You are Amy's soulmate, you guys are meant to be. Nothing that prince gives Amy can be better than what you two have together–"

"Would you just stop right there?" Ty asked politely, even though his voice was full of hidden aggression. "It's not the prince. It's Amy."

"What about Amy?" Lou asked. Ty didn't know how to exactly put it.

"She wants me as much as I want this headache", Ty scoffed, hinting he wasn't in the mood to argue over this.

"You want that headache?" Caleb frowned.

"No, idiot, I don't want this headache and she doesn't want me", Ty was getting frustrated. A low "oh" slipped through Caleb's lips.

"What makes you say that? The fact that she gave you back the ring?" Lou guessed. Ty assumed Amy had already been talking to Lou, since there was no other way Lou could have known all these details.

"That, and the fact that she said so."

"But, Ty, you know Amy. Her mood changes quickly. Maybe she didn't really mean it", Lou tried. Ty was shaking his head along her words.

"It wasn't just what she said, it was what she did."

"Maybe if you'd call her and talk about it again, things would be different, she would feel different now that she has had time to think about it. It can be overwhelming being back together after being apart for so long. Trust me, I know. Me and Peter have the same thing every time he goes to Vancouver and comes back", Lou explained. "It's just the pain of re-entry."

"No", Ty stood up, feeling lightheaded for a while. "I'm sick of this. Every time Amy does something, has "one of her moods", shuts me off, runs away, it's always my fault, it's always something I did. And it's always something I should fix. But not this time. I've done everything that's expected of me, everything to make sure she knows I love her and that I want her to be happy, yet she still gave me back that damn ring and wanted to end this. I'm not–" he couldn't stop the words, so they kept stumbling over one another, "I'm done with this! And you guys… you always take Amy's side on this, because she's family. Well have you ever considered maybe it's not just me who screws things up? Because there are two people in a relationship, you know. I know it's easy to place the blame on me, because I have the reputation. But I've come a long way since I came here, I've cleaned my act, I'm not the same punk anymore. I've always made sure Amy is taken care off, that she has whatever she wants. But it's never been enough, has it? I've never been enough. So, I'm not gonna go back to her, because this isn't my fault. I couldn't have been better for her without sacrificing myself even more. I deserve more, I deserve better. And Amy is not that, not for me. I'm not just some puppet she can use and abuse however she wants. I have more value and this relationship is taking that value away from me and it's very destructive. I need to snap out of it. If I'd go back to her, she'd think that it's okay to treat people this way, because I always come back to her. But not this time. Not this time."

"So… you're not gonna even try…?" Lou sounded upset.

"Didn't you just hear me - she doesn't want to be with me!" Ty laughed out of frustration. "There's no hidden agenda and even if there would be on her part, I'm done with these games. I want an honest and healthy relationship. Not this push and pull thing. She might have been right about one thing: all this getting back together and walking on eggshells was just avoiding the inevitable. I dare to be braver than that and move on", Ty explained one more time. "So, have I made myself clear enough? I'm done with Amy."

And before he could even finish his sentence, Lou burst into tears and left the trailer. Confused Jack didn't know where to look, but his instincts told him to follow his granddaughter - she needed him the most.

But there was one more thing he had to say before leaving.

"Ty… No matter what's happened with you and Amy, just know that you'll always be family to us."

"Thanks, Jack…" Ty said, even if he didn't know how he felt about that.

Jack shut the door behind him, and Caleb let out a whistle.

"That was one speech…" he commented.

"And I meant every word. Maybe Amy did me a favor after all…" Ty scoffed.


	17. Chapter 17

Lou sat in the truck, wiping her cheeks and letting out sobs. She wanted to leave, but at the same time she didn't want to go home. That would just mean she had to face this feeling over again, but even more intensely.

Jack rushed right after her and got inside, worried about Lou and her reaction. He was heartbroken to hear about the end of Ty and Amy's relationship too, but to Lou it seemed more personal. It had always been like that; she was almost some kind of spokesperson for them whenever they needed one.

Jack looked at the woman sat next to her.

"Lou, are you okay?"

"No… I'm not okay", Lou said through tears.

"What's wrong?" he asked, even though it might have been the obvious answer. Still, Jack had to ask.

"It's just… Ty and Amy…" Lou explained, feeling embarrassed about her way of reacting. She knew she shouldn't have been this upset.

"Yeah…?"

"I can't believe what Ty just said", she gestured toward the trailer, angry at him. "How could he just let all of that go so easily? Doesn't he love her?"

"Well, you heard him. It wasn't just his decision, it was Amy's too. And we have to respect that, no matter how disappointed we are for them", Jack adviced.

"Yeah, but… maybe they should just try harder, you know. He must know she loves him, so whatever difficulties they face - long distance, other people -, they can make it through if they just do it together", Lou was so passionate about her speech that it made Jack suspicious.

"Are we still talking about Ty and Amy here…?" he had to ask.

Lou looked at him, blushing when she realized she might have let something slip. She tried to regain composure.

"Lou…?" Jack asked gently. "What's really bothering you?"

Lou sighed.

"I guess the reason why I've been so invested in Ty and Amy's relationship is because… it's like a fairy tale, you know. He came into her life right after mom's death and helped her handle it. And Ty… he had these demons he was struggling with and she was there for him. No matter how hard it got for them, they were always there for each other and in love, and they always got back together", Lou spoke. "I guess I wanted it to be about the prince, so it would make things easier. That it wasn't really about them, but some external force that they just had to get rid of. And I really wanted to help them, because…" she looked down, her voice getting frail.

"Because…?" Jack encouraged her on.

"Because that's what I want for myself. That someone would just come and rescue me too, tell what I should do so I could make things right. But if they can't make it work, is there any hope for the rest of us?" she choked on her words and started crying again.

"Lou… what's going on with you and Peter?" Jack had to ask. Even though he didn't like to get in the middle of other people's relationships, he couldn't just turn a blind eye to this. Of course he had heard their fights and seen the strains in their relationship, but then they'd be fine again after a while.

"I don't know… I just feel like something's not there", Lou's breathing was getting heavier as she was trying to hold back the sobbing. "He says he loves me, but does he feel it too? Or is it just a habit?"

She had not expected to tell this to her own grandfather, but she didn't have anyone else she could tell this to. The only friend she really had was Marney, but Lou couldn't let her know that their perfect family image was slowly falling apart, not when they had had this competition about their marriages and kids as long as they had been married and had kids.

Of course there was Amy, but she was in Europe and unreachable - and apparently she too was dealing with relationship issues.

"Why don't you just ask him?" Jack figured talking was always the best option. Assuming just lead to misunderstandings and unnecessary drama. He had learned that lesson after Tim had played cupid with him and Lisa. They could have gotten here sooner and married sooner (not that anyone else knew about it yet, besides Tim) had they learned to talk and be straight with one another. It was never too late to start things over; you just had to break free from old habits.

"I've tried, but he keeps saying we're fine. But I don't feel fine", Lou confessed. "And it's not just me who sees it, it's other people too."

"Well, you shouldn't let other people tell you things about your relationship", Jack offered an advice. Lou watched him, confused.

"Then why did you come here if you didn't want to help Ty and Amy figure things out?"

"Because I wanted to make sure Ty was okay. And you too. Good thing I did", Jack thought. Had he not come with Lou, she could have gotten herself even more hurt if she had decided to drive away feeling like this, thoughts distracted from the road by her emotions. "But you gotta understand, what Ty and Amy are going through has nothing to do with you and Peter. You can't compare relationships, because they are not to be compared. Every one of them is different to the next. Ty and Amy's relationship might look like a fairy tale to you, but that's because you're not living it. We only see what we want to see. The reality is, no one's relationship is perfect, definitely not a fairy tale. But that doesn't mean the relationship wouldn't be worth having. And it might be hard to deal with that reality and the hardships you face, but in the end, it's all up to us. It's kind of like Ty said: he can't make it work for two of them, neither can you, or Peter. You all have to want to make it work. But just because it isn't working now, doesn't mean it could never work. You just have to start somewhere."

Lou nodded. She figured it made sense.

"Now, I don't know what's going on with Amy, but at least we know Ty is okay, we know he's alive and kicking. If he keeps that attitude, he'll be just fine, whether his future is with or without Amy. We don't know the ending yet, but that's not the point, is it? We just have to take one step at a time. – You said you haven't been able to reach Amy yet, right?" Jack checked.

"Yeah… That's right. She hasn't returned to any of my calls or texts. I guess she's avoiding me. Who could blame her…" Lou sniffled, feeling sorry for herself. "I'm such a train-wreck. The last thing she needs right now is me, her hysterical sister at the other end of the line, while she's going through the biggest change of her life."

"Don't you say that about my granddaughter", Jack brushed Lou's cheek. "You have a good heart, Lou. You may say you're upset about this situation because you and Peter are having some problems too, but I don't think that's the whole truth. I bet you're upset about Ty and Amy just as much, because you love them both and especially when they are together. This is not something we can fix for them, but we can be there for them. I suggest we call Amy when we get home, find out how she's doing. She might not need our advice, but I'm betting what she needs is an ear that listens. How does that sound?"

"Sounds good…" Lou nodded, watching Jack through welled up eyes. "Thanks, Grandpa", she crawled closer to hug him. Jack wrapped his arms around her, hoping it'd calm her down.


	18. Chapter 18

The driver helped Amy with the car door when she left Mallory's. She was pulling her coat on, tighter, but leaving it unbuttoned, knowing the car would be heated and therefore she didn't need another layer to keep her warm. Back home, it always took a while before Grandpa's truck would be warm enough to even sit in, let alone ready for driving. Here, everything was always waiting for her and taken care of. She was slowly getting used to it, which only meant going back home would be a shock.

"Thank you", she said to the driver and sat at the backseat.

"You're welcome, Miss Fleming."

"How was your friend? I did not expect you to return so soon", Ahmed asked, sitting on the other side of the backseat. Amy glanced at him, wondering what to tell about the awkward visit. Things with Mallory had not gone according to a plan - Amy had been hoping to reconnect with some people while she was in Europe, but this visit had not encouraged her too much about her plans to see Soraya in London. Maybe her best friend was a different thing, but it all felt like too overwhelming to her at this point. At the end of the day, her main focus should have been on the tour and not in her personal life.

"She was fine. Like she's always been", Amy simply said. It was the truth too; Mallory had never had a problem with telling her opinion - apparently she always knew everything better than anyone else.

"Glad to hear. Anywhere else you would like to stop by?" Ahmed asked. Amy shook her head and looked outside the window. "Good, because I have something planned for us. Since we are in Paris, we should drive around a little and see what the city has to offer. Do you agree?"

"Sure, why not", Amy nodded. She felt more content being with Ahmed anyway. He knew not to bother her with anything and always respected her wishes.

"I find Paris is at its best during night", Ahmed spoke as they drove on. Amy looked through the window, admiring the architecture and the city lights. But finding beautiful details from the buildings and listening to Ahmed's stories about the locations was just distraction from the burn in her heart.

Mallory thought this was all just some act, like she hadn't set her heart in this and it was all only for Ahmed - but the girl was wrong. This was her dream, an opportunity of a lifetime, something people were ready to kill for. So of course she wasn't going to let it slip by. The fact that she was doing it in designer clothes had nothing to do with it.

Later that night, Ahmed was walking Amy to her suite. They were both staying on the same floor at one of the best hotels in Paris. Walking down the halls reminded Amy about something.

"I've completely forgotten, but I still have my things at the hotel back in Normandy. I haven't had time to pick them up to the mansion", Amy said and Ahmed opened the room door for her, gently pushing it open.

"I will arrange someone to pick them up", Ahmed offered.

"No, actually if you don't mind, I would like to pick them up myself", she requested, not feeling too comfortable about someone else collecting her personal possession.

"Of course, as you wish."

"Okay. Thanks for this day, it was amazing", she smiled, feeling thankful for having a friend like Ahmed. This kind of lifestyle was one to breed jealousy in people you had thought to be your friends. But Ahmed knew this world, in fact he was the one generously offering a glimpse into it, so there wasn't going to a problem with him.

"No, thank you. I cannot remember the last time I have been this entertained", Ahmed smiled and handed Amy the key to her room. "I will be falling asleep with a smile on my face tonight and it is all because of you. Goodnight, Amy."

"Goodnight, Ahmed", she leaned in to give both of his cheeks kisses, just like the people in France did. It had been one thing she had been awkward about at first, not knowing which cheek to kiss first or how many kisses were appropriate anyway, but Amy had since then got a hang of it.

"See you tomorrow", Amy said.

"Sleep well", Ahmed added and then left to his door.

Tomorrow they were to travel back to Normandy and would get back to work a day after that. Amy was looking forward to reuniting with the horses, because they had made great strides with them, Zeus especially. The stallion had a fiery temper, but Amy had learned to use it for his advantage. Slowly but surely, Ahmed's horses were starting to feel like her own; she knew how they behaved, their strengths and weaknesses and could tell if they had a bad day just by looking at them.

Walking into her room, Amy heard a low buzzing sound coming from somewhere. It took her a while to realize it was coming from her handbag. She fished out the cellphone and looked at the caller ID. "Heartland", the text read. It was probably Lou again…

"Hello…?" Amy answered, thinking what she had told to herself back at Mallory's place: one neurotic person at a time. Mallory was now crossed off the list, so it was Lou's turn. Amy knew her sister well enough to know that if she wouldn't get an answer, she would keep trying as long as it would take for her to get one.

"Amy, thank god! Where have you been? Are you okay?" Lou sighed out of relief. Amy was hoping she wouldn't have to end this day with any more hassle.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just been busy, sorry. I've had my phone on mute the whole day - it's actually been my day off", she tried to chat something light, so Lou wouldn't get straight to the point. It felt better for Amy to think her sister cared about her beyond her relationship with Ty.

"What's going on with you? Why is Ty back?" Lou then asked, making Amy sigh. Apparently Lou was not going to beat around the bush.

"So you heard…" Amy commented, removing her shoes.

"News travel fast around here, so of course I heard. He tells me you guys broke up, that you even gave back the ring. What's happening here? This doesn't sound like you at all", Lou left out the part where Ty had been angry about the way Amy had changed and behaved around him. She wanted to hear Amy's take on this before taking any sides.

Knowing Lou and Ty had talked, Amy wasn't sure how to feel about it. She had realized that it was going to happen, sooner or later, but it still made her uneasy. Amy wondered if Ty had had anything nice to say about her at all. When he had left, Ty had seemed really bitter about the break-up which was understandable, of course.

"Well… I don't really know what to say", Amy shrugged and twisted her arm back to open the zipper on her dress. "I realized I had moved on from him without even realizing. He didn't seem that interesting to me anymore. I felt like there is more out there in the world than what I got from that relationship."

"What can be more important than a good relationship with someone you love?" Lou was baffled.

"Actually, I'm not sure about that - the love part, I mean. It was almost like… I looked at him and he was like someone from a dream. Someone I knew was supposed to be important to me, but… to whom I didn't feel any connection to anymore. It was like I woke up and I realized dreams are just dreams - not everything that happens in them is supposed to be like in real life. The reality was actually much more appealing", Amy spoke. "Maybe some relationships run their course, but you can't see it before you've taken some distance. And being here for two months has opened my eyes to what was and what should be."

"I still don't get it", Lou admitted. "You don't love Ty anymore?"

"I don't really know. It gets harder to definite what I feel the longer I think about it. I know I loved him, but… it's like my emotions have morphed into something else. What used to be love, is no longer - like it's lost its currency. He's had an important part in my life, but I feel like… things have changed."

"Or you have changed?"

"I guess you could say that. I'm more focused now, more driven, I'm not just settling for something. I've realized I can do things I never knew could be possible - or things I never even knew existed. Getting married and settling down just doesn't sound like something I'd want right now, and I know it's what Ty wants, so… it was a no-brainer, really. It would be wrong of me to keep him waiting for the day I might feel like that, because I can't be sure if I'm going to feel it again. Right now, everything is just wide open for me. I don't get my kicks from the things I used to get them. When I'm working, it's like there's new brand of adrenaline rushing in my veins", Amy was painting the picture for Lou.

"So, you wanna be single and… work harder?" Lou checked. Amy was waiting for Lou's conversion, but so far, she had been surprisingly non-judgmental about everything she had told her.

"Yeah. When you live in a place like Hudson, you think that's it, that that's all there is. You learn to love those things, because you don't know about anything else. But then when you travel, you see these other things and you realize just how naïve you've been. The things that used to matter, don't matter as much anymore. They turn… bleak. I felt like Ty was keeping me from what I want to achieve now. Because if I'm honest, I don't think my job back at Hudson, the clinic with him and all those things we planned will feel as good as this. I don't want to do something because I'm expected to do it, because I once thought it was what I wanted, it's not fair to Ty. Or to me. I don't wanna look back my life and think, I wish I would've done this or done that. I think you know what I mean; you went to New York because it was what you wanted", Amy spoke again. "I was mad at you about that back then, but I get it now."

"Are you sure…?" Lou was hesitant. "It's just you've always told me that–"

"Forget what I've said before, I'm not the same person. I'm more evolved, I'm on a next level. And I don't wanna come down", Amy was almost high on this feeling.

"That sounds… exciting", Lou offered an adjective. She felt bad about it, but she tried to remember Jack's words: no matter how she felt about Ty or Amy's decision, she still had to respect what they wanted. And seemed like Amy was sure about this. So who was she to take that away from her. "If you're sure about this, then I guess I have no say in it…"

"I am, Lou, trust me. And I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me. I'm well taken care of", Amy almost read her mind, because Lou did worry about her sister. It was hard to accept she was becoming an adult and wasn't afraid to face the world on her own.

"As long as you're doing things that feel right in your heart", Lou added. She was happy Amy was chasing her dreams, but was also worried about everything else on the side. Lou knew what the business life was like; it could be a cold place and there was no room for emotions in the decision making. Women especially had it hard. And Amy, she had always been one to listen to her heart. What Lou didn't want was for Amy to turn into a heartless monster, like the kinds she had seen in New York. Or worse - brokenhearted.

Amy didn't know what to say. She wanted to assure Lou that she was doing what was in her heart, but she then realized she had to really think where this decision was actually coming from. Was it from her heart? Or had her head taken over? The main reason why she had left Heartland was her need to make money. While it had been a business decision, the core of it had been Ty. But she could no longer see a future with Ty, so what was she working toward to?

Her future needed some re-evaluation.

She loved horses, that much she knew, but… was the excitement about the job and the benefits about loving them, or just appreciating them? It was refreshing to have no boundaries while trying things out and not have to rethink something just because she didn't have the time or the money. So was this really about her love for freedom more than the job after all? Was this her not wanting to limit herself?

"Amy, you still there?" Lou asked.

"Yeah, sorry, I spaced. I guess I'm just tired. It's 10 pm and it's been a long day so…" Amy explained, "I'll call you in few days, okay?"

"Yeah, okay. Just… take care of yourself, Amy. Promise?"

"I promise. Love you."

"Love you too."

 _Love_ , Amy thought, _when she hung up, was a very complex thing. And she really needed to rethink what it actually meant._


	19. Chapter 19

A big plastic bag, some rock music and really strong coffee; those were the three things Ty needed for cleaning up his trailer from all the junk that was only making him unfocused. It was ironic that it was a day after Valentine's Day, when Ty was shoving in pictures of him and Amy in the plastic bag, not even giving them one last look. The photographs from above the mirror had to go, same thing with the frame he had already tampered earlier.

"What else…?" he wondered to himself and put down the bag, going around and looking into things. Ty walked to the shelf next to the sofa and pulled out a dust covered wooden box. He knew what it was, but he had to look inside anyway.

The day was yet to come when he had promised himself to use it for the first time ever, but now, he wasn't so sure if he wanted to keep it anymore. Inside the box was a gift from Amy, a stethoscope she had given him when he had gone back to school. He had his own vet kit with another stethoscope, but this one had been on the shelf and serviced as a motivator to him when he was pulling out his hair and having sleepless nights over exams and courses. Ty was fast-tracking and hoped to keep things that way, which meant the day of graduation was getting closer and closer.

Ty took out the stethoscope from the mold and placed the box back to the shelf, then adjusting the ear tips to both of his ears and put his music to a pause so he could actually hear something. He grabbed the chestpiece between his fingers, placing it underneath his shirt and searched for his heartbeat. The material was cold against his skin and it made him shiver. Maybe it was a little bit corny, but he still wanted to hear that his heart was beating, even without Amy.

And it was. Even if she had broke it, stamped on the pieces and left him like she had, his heart was beating just fine.

"'ello!" Ty heard Caleb's voice through the tips. He looked at the door, pulled the tips out and placed the stethoscope aside. The cowboy frowned, noticing he was playing with the equipment. "Should I worry about your heart?"

"Nah. I was just… testing it", Ty explained.

"Okay, good", Caleb nodded, trying to calm down his own heart back to its usual beat. "So, I brought the trailer, like you asked. What do you plan on doing with it?"

"I'm going to get Harley", Ty said and walked to grab his jacket. "You kept Shorty here too once upon a time, right?"

"Well yeah, but… he likes it better with other horses at the rodeo grounds. Horses are herd animals, you know. Don't you think it'd be better to leave him at Heartland? Or is Jack kicking him out?" Caleb asked.

"No, I was just thinking I don't want to go see him there. When Amy gets back, or if she ever gets back…" he rolled his eyes, "I don't wanna bump into her. I wanna be in control of my things, you know."

"Yeah, I guess I get it, but", Caleb said and placed his hand on Ty's chest before he could walk pass him, "maybe you should bring him to the rodeo grounds? It could be better for him."

"Wow, when did you get so soft?" Ty smirked a little. He could remember a time when horses were just tools for Caleb - in fact he had considered talking to them as childish. These days he was more gentle with the animals - but then again, Caleb had changed a lot since those days. Maybe it was the horses that got to him, or Ashley.

"When Amy taught me a thing or two about them", Caleb said, knowing that it would create an awkward atmosphere in the trailer. And it did. Ty scoffed. Even when she wasn't around, Amy was around.

"Look, man. I know you're trying to get over her and all, that's cool, sounds like this isn't like any other fight for you guys anyway, but just because she hurt you, doesn't mean she's a bad person", Caleb tried to soften things for his friend.

"Whose side are you on?" Ty frowned. Seemed like he was slowly losing people to Amy, because apparently he was the bad guy here, he was the one moving on and leaving poor Amy behind. But if people had seen what happened in France, they might have thought things differently.

"Yours, of course, but Amy is my friend too. She's helped me to get up on my feet few times after some rough patches. So I hope that just because you guys are through, I'm not supposed to treat her like an air too", Caleb said.

"It's fine, do whatever you want, I don't really care. But just don't go play all Cupid on us, okay? Because like I already explained, it's not gonna happen anymore", Ty shrugged. "I already have Lou to avoid and I don't wanna start avoiding you too."

"Yeah… She seemed pretty upset last night…" Caleb noted, nodding to himself. "Maybe you should talk to her?"

"I don't know…" Ty sighed. "What if she starts that thing again?"

"You're not gonna turn into those women hating guys, are you? Just because one girl breaks your heart, doesn't mean all the women are like that. You'll see", Caleb worried, keeping up his endless optimism.

"No, it's not that. It's not about this anger toward women, it's this quality Lou and Amy both have; they don't give up, no matter what. Except… Amy did give up on us, so I guess it's not her quality anymore", Ty shrugged and took his cell to his pocket.

He didn't know who Amy was anymore. Her naivety had annoyed him at times, but it had also made them a strong couple when things had gotten rough; they had needed that foolish hope she had had for everything, and Ty's fighting skills had become handy too. He had always been the pessimistic one, but seemed like the roles had somehow gotten reversed along the way. "Anyway… I'm gonna go now. Can I borrow your keys? Maybe it's better to just use your truck since the trailer is already attached to it."

"Yeah, sure", Caleb asked and ditched him the keys. "Can I make myself at home?"

"Like you've ever cared to ask that before", Ty hummed and grabbed the keys.

"True", Caleb laughed and kicked off his boots.

"Thanks. I owe you one", Ty said, heading out the door.

"No worries, man."

Ty steered Caleb's truck to Heartland and let out of heavy sigh when he passed the gate. He had not been sure if he'd ever get back here, but ever since he had started to get his life in a new order, he had to deal with everything that involved Amy. And Harley was big part of it.

Slamming shut the door, Ty stepped out of the vehicle. He saw no one else, except for Georgie who was walking out from the barn with Phoenix. A big smile spread across her face when she saw Ty.

"Ty! You're back!" she hurried up to him, Phoenix following her lead. "How was the trip? How was Amy? What are you doing with Caleb's truck? And what's with the trailer?" the questions just kept coming and Ty had no idea where to start. The girl obviously had no clue about the state of his relationship with Amy, because she was still so eager to know about her aunt. Ty hated the fact that he had to be the one who'd have to tell Georgie about everything; people often denied the truth when they got these sort of news and Ty wasn't in the mood to explain all the details - again. It was like Amy was still mocking him at the back of his mind by not informing anyone about anything, but Ty figured that must've been the way she chose to live now.

Hell, he would have even been grateful of Lou spilling the beans for once - and that said a lot.

"Uhm, I'm getting Harley", Ty only said.

"Why? What are you gonna do with him?" Georgie's smile dropped. It was rare that Ty even had time with the horse these days, but when he did, he took him on a trail ride nearby. The horse never left the property.

"Well actually, I'm thinking about selling him", Ty wanted to be honest. She was going to find out sooner or later, and with all the secrets he was holding, Ty didn't want this to be another.

"What, why?" Georgie seemed shocked.

"Life's gotten busy lately and it's not fair of me to abandon him like this. He needs someone who has time for him", Ty told her like it was. It was why he was doing it in the first place, but also because the ghost of Amy was traveling with the horse like a shadow. Ty had bought Harley to her in the first place, when Amy's horse, Spartan, had been stolen by a local thug, Wes. But the black gelding had since turned up and Harley had become Ty's own horse.

"But… I can ride him", Georgie offered. She didn't like saying goodbye to horses. "Just don't take him away, please", the girl begged.

"Yeah, I guess you could, but aren't you a bit busy? You know, your trick-riding lessons, ballet and jumping with Phoenix? Not to mention your school", Ty listed and gestured toward the white horse who was getting restless already.

"I can always make time for another horse. Besides, when Amy gets back, the work load will get easier", Georgie was sure. "Talking about Amy…"

"Actually, I'm kind of in a hurry. And looks like Phoenix can't wait to get to the ring either, so why don't we talk later?" he suggested, hoping to steer the conversation elsewhere.

"Oh… okay. So… he's going now?" Georgie asked. "Harley, I mean."

"Yeah, that was the plan. That's why the trailer. But I need to find him a buyer first, so he'll be at the rodeo grounds for some time. You can come see him if you want", Ty said.

He was going to miss this; talking and doing things with Georgie. The girl had massive amount of energy and it could be very contagious. Their pasts might have not been identical, but both Ty and Georgie had a mutual understanding about what it was like when you didn't get to have a proper childhood. He had never had siblings of his own, but she had a big brother, and in a way they had both found something that what missing from each other: Ty was holding the place of a big brother for Jeff and in return Georgie got to play the part of a little sister.

"Okay, for sure", Georgie nodded and revealed her set of teeth while grinning.

"Okay, see you. Be careful out there, I bet it's slippery", Ty wanted to add. He worried about her too; Georgie was a known daredevil.

"Alright, alright, I will", the girl assured. "Tsk, tsk, come on, Phoenix!"

The girl left the ring with her horse.

Ty then faced the barn again, looking at the building and sighing. Shutting Amy out had been easier at the trailer, but here… it was almost impossible.


	20. Chapter 20

Amy walked into her room back at the mansion, while her personal assistant, Lucas, followed her steps with her suitcase. The bag wasn't heavy, but Lucas had insisted on carrying it for her after Amy had gathered everything she needed. "That's what assistants are for", had been Lucas' reply.

Now that she had picked up her clothes and things from the hotel and was fully settled into the mansion, Amy felt relieved to have her life in one place. The mansion, like the hotel, didn't feel like a home to her, because none of the places she was staying in had any personal touch in them - which had left Amy with nothing but a bag things that made it her home.

"Where do you want this?" Lucas asked, looking around with a suitcase in his hand. Amy's gaze traveled across the room as she pondered the reply.

"Just put it… anywhere, thanks", Amy said, gesturing toward the room. She put down her handbag and removed her jacket, studying Lucas' doings. When the man placed the suitcase next to the couch, Amy nodded with approval. "That's fine, thank you."

She then noticed something on the couch and went to examine it.

"What's this?" Amy wondered out loud, glancing at Lucas like he had better idea where this box had suddenly appeared from.

"I don't know", Lucas shrugged and came to see. "It has a card on it", he noticed and picked it up for her. "Here."

"Thanks", Amy said and took the card out from its envelope. It had a beautiful handwriting on it and just one line. "Wear this tonight. - Ahmed", she read it and frowned. "What's tonight…? Some kind of special occasion?"

"The prince's birthday", Lucas knew. "People have been making arrangements for few days now."

Amy looked at him, a fearful look in her eyes. "Was I supposed to be aware of that? I have no gift for him."

"The prince wishes no gifts", Lucas told her. "In fact, we haven't had a party for ages. Maybe this is your doing, Miracle Girl", he hinted and smiled a little. The servants were talking - things had changed ever since Ahmed had discovered Amy from somewhere. The tone of his voice didn't go unnoticed by Amy and she rubbed her neck nervously. "Do you need help with something else?"

"No, this is fine. Thanks for the help, Lucas", Amy wanted to say before the man left her room.

"You're welcome."

As she put down the card and opened the lid from the box, Amy tried to ignore what Lucas was trying to hint with his words. He was probably just saying what everyone else was saying: as soon as a man and a woman became friends, they had to have more to their relationship than just friendship. But Amy didn't want a romance with Ahmed, in fact thinking about it made her feel weird; she was here to work.

Amy went through few sheets of paper before finding a red dress underneath.

"Oh…" she sighed and took it out carefully, feeling the light fabric in her hands. Ahmed must've gotten one good look at her clothes back home and known she wasn't very familiar with shopping. The first time Ahmed has suggested she'd go buy a new set of clothes, Amy had been too scared to even try anything because the price tags had ridiculous numbers on them and creating some kind of stain on the clothes would've put her to a personal bankruptcy. But after a while Amy had realized she could no longer put on her own clothes or she'd embarrass everyone else - and herself. So, she had decided to look presentable and Ahmed had been a big help with it. The prince had a good, but expensive taste - not that it'd mattered to him, since he didn't have to worry about money like Amy did.

Walking in front of her mirror, Amy adjusted the dress against her own clothes and imagined how she'd look in it. She realized she needed to do something with her hair, put on some jewelry and pick nice shoes to go with it before she'd be the belle of the ball. This almost reminded her about playing with the dolls when she was a little, but this time she was the doll.

Later that night, Amy walked to the party and took in the view. Everyone had been so stressed about the tour, but they were now in good spirits, sipping champagne and having a laugh with one another. She wasn't sure where this idea of celebrating a birthday had finally come from, but it looked like it was a success and it immediately eased Amy's mind. She wasn't still completely comfortable with entertaining people or having a small talk, but it helped to get inside of these fancy clothes, because they made her get into the character known as the Head Trainer. She was a far cry from the Miracle Girl who would never wear these heels or even spend time with these people. That girl used to get her kicks from simple pleasures like a cup of tea in front of the hearth after a long day or not having to brush a horse because it had decided not to roll in its own maneuver.

"Amy, there you are", Ahmed immediately noticed her. "It was easy to spot you from the crowd when you are wearing that dress. It looks great on you", he complimented Amy, his grin revealing his dimples.

"Thank you, Ahmed. You look great too", Amy smiled, a blush dancing on her cheeks. "And happy birthday."

"Thank you", Ahmed accepted the congratulations and even bowed his head a little. "Champagne?" he stopped the waiter walking pass.

"No, thank you. Do you have anything else?" Amy requested. Ahmed translated it to French. The waiter nodded and Amy felt bad for not being comfortable enough with her own French skills to do that. "Non-alcoholic, please", she added. Ahmed said repeated in French too, even though it sounded almost the same.

"He will be right back", Ahmed told Amy. "So, you got your things from the hotel, yes?"

"Yes, thank you", Amy said. She noticed people's eyes were on them and it made her feel uncomfortable, again. "Listen, Ahmed, I was hoping we could talk, somewhere private."

"Sure. Let's just wait till you get your drink", Ahmed suggested and Amy nodded, while she was mentally preparing herself already. She wasn't completely sure what she'd say to Ahmed, but hoped that it would eventually flow out and make things better. Even though a lot of things had changed, one thing hadn't: Amy was still not good at talking.

They walked to a balcony and Amy looked at the city lights far away in the horizon. She shivered, but tried not to show it because she didn't want Ahmed to offer her his jacket - it would only make things more awkward.

"So… what it is you wanted to talk about?" Ahmed asked.

"I need to say something to you", Amy turned to him, hoping she wouldn't mess this up. "As you know, Ty and I broke up. But… I hope you haven't gotten a wrong impression because of it."

"Impression…?" Ahmed echoed, not sure what Amy was talking about.

"Just because I'm no longer with Ty, doesn't mean I'm… looking for anyone else", she decided to put it, hoping Ahmed would get the rest. It took a while until Ahmed's eyes lit up.

"Do you mean… you think I am interested in you…?" Ahmed asked.

"Yeah… People are talking. They think there's something going on", Amy added, so he'd realize it wasn't just her saying this.

"I am sorry if I have given you or them that impression. It was not my intention to make you feel like that", Ahmed couldn't even hold a gaze. "I apologize, sincerely."

"I guess it's because you're so polite all of a sudden and give me special treatment. It's nice, but I don't want you to think that… I would see you that way", Amy wished he wasn't about to break his heart.

"You western people confuse me", Ahmed hummed. "First you say I'm too unfeeling, rude and angry, but when I start being polite, it's too much, too familiar, too suggesting. That it has… strings attached. I am sorry, I do not know how to do it right and find the balance, I am still learning this."

"Oh… I'm sorry, I just had to make it clear. I'm here to do business, that's all", Amy repeated what she had once promised. "You're an attractive and kind man, Ahmed, I'm sure you'll find someone."

All of a sudden, Ahmed walked to the edge of the balcony to look at the view. Amy sensed he had not liked what she had said. Maybe he had said one thing, but felt another. Either way, Amy needed to stand her ground on this.

"Ahmed, I didn't mean to hurt you. You know that, right?" Amy walked beside him. "We are friends and partners, so I feel like we should be able to be honest with each other."

"I know… You are right", he nodded, still not forming an eye contact. "I have a confession to make", Ahmed admitted. Amy held her breath, feeling herself nervous again. "I admit, I was a little happy when you said Ty would no longer wait you at home. But not because of what you may think. When we met… and the longer I have come to know you, I have seen a passion in you. And by that I mean, you love horses. Where as I… I do not know too much about horses, but I want to. I have been able to have that connection with Zeus and I want to keep feeling it. It is all because of you, Amy. See, people have expectations of me and my future. They want me to be a great horseman, just like my father. They expect me to rule, to marry and to make children. But, I have known for a while that I do not feel that way to women as it is expected of me."

Amy frowned and went through Ahmed's last line again. What did he mean exactly?

"Do you mean…" Amy was afraid to say it, but maybe Ahmed was scared and she would only do him a favor by admitting it for him, "you… feel like that to men…?"

"What? No", Ahmed denied and turned to face Amy. "What I am saying is I do not feel that way to anyone at all. I do not experience love, not the way you do. And I know people might not always marry for love, especially in my culture, but I do not want to captivate anyone into a marriage, because they deserve more", he tried to explain. "So, I may be the last of my family, but I do not wish to go down as the forgotten prince; I want to be remembered of something. And that is where you come in. Amy, I have been hoping to learn your ways, the thing that makes you so special. And I know that feeling happiness for your break-up makes me a bad person, but I do not feel that way anymore, you have proven that you are here because you want to, not because you have to, but I am hoping that after these four months, you would stay here with me and help me to be the best horseman I can be. Help me to make my father proud", he had a noble look on his face as he said it. It reminded Amy that she was not dealing with any other client, but a prince. "So, what do you say?"

Amy was speechless. This wasn't at all what she had expected and she wasn't sure if she felt relieved or even worse. At least Ahmed didn't have romantic feeling for her, but he still had so much expectations when it came to her. The only thing Amy knew was that she needed to digest this.

"Can I think about it…?"

"Of course", Ahmed nodded. "I realize it is a big decision for you."

"Yeah, it is…" Amy nodded.

She turned her face against the wind and let the thoughts sink in. Did she wanted to go back home or stay here, where her talents were appreciated and she had everything she could ask for?


	21. Chapter 21

As Lou was working on her blog post about "communication being the key to everything", she realized it was something they had never really embraced in her family. Often times Georgie blurting things out took Lou by surprise and made the mother of two realize that the Fleming way to handle feelings was to let them bottle up and age like a fine wine. She had always thought they were a family that could talk about everything and in a way they were, but the longer Lou wrote her blog entry, the more she realized talking wasn't necessarily communicating.

She admitted it: sometimes the only reason she waited for the other one to finish was so that she could talk instead - but in the process, Lou realized, she wasn't paying attention to what the other one was saying. Maybe that was how Peter was going at this too. At least somewhere along the way they had lost the track of each other. Who was she really even married to? Was Peter just a sum of arguments she had won or lost, or was he a person too?

"Hey boy, how are you doing?"

Lou's hearing sharpened when she realized Ty was in the barn. She leaned back in her chair and peeked in through the open doorway, noticing Ty standing next to Harley's stall. Immediately Lou froze in fear. The last time they had seen each other, Ty had been furious about Amy and Lou had been in tears. It had once again been a great example just how they had gone wrong about this whole communication thing: before arrival, Lou had already set up the whole conversation in her head (including Ty's replies) and when it had not gone according to a plan, she had crashed and gotten hurt.

If she was going to make this right, she should be able to be open to everything and every response and not assume something that might not even be there, lurking between the lines. Maybe this was a place to start?

And if things would go well, she could take this to the next level - with Peter.

"Hey…" Lou walked to the doorway and caught Ty's attention. The young man glanced at her and his shoulders tensed in anticipation. He gave Lou a nod as a way of greeting. "What's going on?"

"I've come to get Harley. I'm taking him to the rodeo grounds", Ty filled Lou in. "I'm gonna tell Jack too, of course, but maybe it's good for you to know as well - since now you'll have a free stall for renting."

"Well, the business hasn't really boomed while Amy's been away, but… good to know", Lou thanked him. "Why the sudden change…?" she was curious and already secretly assuming, but tried to allow Ty tell her the truth himself.

"I'm trying to move on. And I feel like having something back here at Heartland might set me back", Ty said, gathering Harley's things into a trunk. He was hoping it would underline to Lou just how over he was with Amy.

"Ty… Can I ask you something?"

Ty nodded.

"I'm trying to understand all of this. I don't mean to pry, but… Amy's my sister. And you're like a brother to me. I know this isn't really my business, but things are gonna change, so I need to understand what I'm dealing with here", Lou explained.

"Like you said, Amy's your sister, why don't you ask her? She's filled you in before, hasn't she?" Ty was still not willing to do Amy any favors.

"Well… not really. The first time I heard about this was when Caleb told me. Amy wasn't returning my calls until yesterday afternoon. Even then, she was so focused on looking forward, that I couldn't get her to stop for a minute so we could look back and make sense of it all."

"What…? It was Caleb who told you about us?" Ty frowned and Lou nodded. "Unbelievable…"

"You're not mad at him, are you?" Lou didn't want to cause any more trouble.

"No… I just can't believe Amy didn't tell you herself."

"Yeah… I just figured I needed to know what was going on when I picked you up from the bar, so I asked Caleb–"

"Wait, you picked us up?" Ty stopped her there.

"Yeah. You don't remember, do you?" Lou guessed.

"No… I was pretty out of it, I guess…" Ty said, shamefully.

"Yeah you were", Lou recalled. "Anyway… even if Amy is my sister and I'd love to hear it from her and not bother you with this any more than I already have, I just can't really get through to her at all. I feel like… something has shifted with me and her too. She was telling me things, but at the same time I felt like she wasn't really letting me in on anything. It was like everything was… hollow. Where as you and I… Well, you're not afraid to yell at me if the situation demands. Kind of like it's always been with us, exactly how family does it. And no matter what happens with you and Amy, you're still family."

"That's what Jack said too, before you left the trailer", Ty told her, now easing up a bit. Seemed like Lou was ready to listen, and was merely an impartial outsider looking in, so in return he wasn't so afraid of her pestering him with questions. "Okay… I'll tell you what happened in France", he decided, hoping he wasn't making a mistake and just giving Lou something to build a case against him. But he still needed to trust people, even if that trust had suffered because of Amy. "But you have to promise that you won't do anything about it."

"Cross my heart", Lou let her finger make the X pattern across her chest.

"Okay. Well, do you have time now?"

"Yeah. I could make us some coffee too, if you like?" Lou suggested.

"Sure. I haven't had coffee from the barn coffee maker in a long time. I kind of miss it", he smirked a little. Lou came and wrapped her arm around him.

"I actually gave that pot a good wash just the other day, so the coffee might actually taste like coffee for once…" Lou told him, making them both chuckle.

"So, start from the beginning", Lou asked when Ty was seated in the chair and she was positioning herself to the edge of the office table. Ty sighed and tried to think. He had promised himself that he wouldn't linger in those moments anymore, but maybe it was good to let them out one last time before he would fully let them go.

"Well… I arrived to France just like I was meant to. Everything seemed fine, Amy was happy to see me and we were catching up. The first days were difficult, because we were living in different time zones and head spaces overall, so we were trying to fit those together. I just figured it was all natural after being apart for a while. Amy had to work, so I studied when she was away. Then I started to realize she was away even when she was there with me - her head was just somewhere else", Ty told her and wrapped his hands around the coffee mug, thinking back of it all. It was so obvious now, but back then he didn't want to look too much into it. "Do you know when you see a string in your shirt and you just kind of decide to yank it away? It seems harmless, but it bothers you and eventually you can't just leave it alone."

"Hmm, yeah, I think so", Lou nodded, adjusting her cup on her lips.

"You just think it's not a big deal, it's just a small string after all", Ty was making the speech more vivid by using his hands. "But then you actually yank it and it starts unraveling. And as you're thinking you've made a mistake, you also realize you don't know how to stop. That was how it was with Amy. I couldn't leave it alone, but as soon as I started to change things, they started to unravel in a way I never expected."

"What do you mean?" Lou asked.

"Well, I suggested we'd take a few days off to deal with things and have some time together, because it was obvious we weren't really in tune with each other anymore. But then Amy started to "unravel". I couldn't get a hold on her anymore, literally, and couldn't follow where her mind was going. And eventually, I guess we reached this point where there was no return to how things had been; she had come undone completely", Ty swallowed dryly. "We were about to have a romantic vacation together when she told me to pull the car over. I followed her out and she started going on about how she didn't feel good around me anymore, like I was suffocating her, that we didn't fit."

Lou's eyes turned more empathetic the longer Ty talked.

"But I didn't do anything out of the ordinary, I mean, I don't think I did. I've been going through that trip over and over again in my head, and I don't feel like I did anything wrong. And even if I did, she could have just told me, not… end this like she did", Ty was getting frustrated again.

"So… what happened then?" Lou asked, feeling for Ty. It reminded her of Peter somehow: whenever things got too much for him, whenever Lou was "clingy", Peter decided to go back to Vancouver. It was like he couldn't deal with emotions that Lou had.

"Things got ugly pretty quickly. She said she wasn't sure if she could ever live with me, things were said and… I realized she wasn't even interested on going away with me in the first place", his gaze fell on the floor. "She made me feel like an idiot. Like I was worthless… And then when I got back to the car, she followed me and let me know that it was over, like it was her decision to make", Ty's laugh was anything but amused.

"And what did you say…?"

"What could I say? She told me that she was already moving on mentally, so I had no choice but to take back the ring. And I know what you're thinking: why didn't I fight? I tried, the trip was me fighting for us when I noticed we were starting to loose the touch. But she didn't even try. She just… gave up…" Ty's voice trailed off.

"Oh, Ty…" Lou put down the mug and came to give him a hug. "I'm so sorry…"

Ty adjusted his arm around Lou, feeling something positive for the first time since his arrival to France. He had almost forgotten how it felt to feel accepted as he was, embraced like this. "I'm so sorry…"

"It's not your fault…" Ty sniffled.

"I know, but… I just feel like you have to know what you're feeling is okay. I don't care if she's my sister and I'm supposed to protect her with my life, I won't accept just about anything from her. She hurt you, badly. What she did was unacceptable and you shouldn't be okay with it - just like you aren't. You earn an apology - and don't you dare to take anything less."

From the moment things had started to fall apart, Ty had hardened himself against anything that could break him down again. But here was Lou, telling him it was okay to be hurt, that he had a right to be hurt for what Amy had done.

"Thanks, Lou… That… that means a lot", he was almost choking up.

Lou loosened her arms and gave Ty a sympathetic smile.

"I know you said that you're trying to move on, and I get that. But even if you feel like leaving Heartland behind now, don't ever hesitate to come back. We are all here for you", Lou assured. She was worrying about Ty. He didn't have that many people and it wasn't fair for him to lose a bunch of them just because he was no longer with Amy. In times like this, he needed family and friends more than ever.

"Thanks for that. We might not see each other for a while, but I just… wanted to thank you for everything you've done for me. You've taught me how family works. It's something I will always have with me, no matter what happens now", Ty spoke and looked at Lou.

"Well, I wouldn't say we are a prime example", Lou sighed modestly, thinking about her blog post about communication.

"Yeah, but even if you are pretty crazy and dysfunctional…" Ty started.

"Hey!" Lou played offended, making both of them laugh.

"…you're still a family. You love without a doubt. And that's really beautiful. So thanks for teaching me that", Ty said sincerely. Growing up with his mom, dad or Wade had never taught Ty anything equally valuable.

"Well… when you put it that way… it's not a bad legacy to have, I guess…" Lou smiled and shrugged playfully.

And there they sat for a while, sipping their coffees and enjoying their time together, not knowing when they'd have a moment like this again.


	22. Chapter 22

Walking back inside, Amy realized the people were still staring at her, even more than before. With the prince and her at the balcony, everyone's minds were probably running wild with theories about romance and whatnot. But Amy decided not to pay attention to their gossiping, because no matter what they thought, she knew the truth.

"So, Lucas told me you don't usually celebrate your birthday", Amy tried to focus on Ahmed and not paying attention to the curious eyes that were fixed on her. "What's changed?"

"You came along", Ahmed simply said, like it couldn't be any more obvious.

"Me? What did I do?" Amy almost chuckled out of confusion.

"Before you… my people did not look up to me, I only did the necessary with them, but never lingered around. We could not really talk outside business, because they did not see me as a person but as a boss", Ahmed admitted, still holding a glass of champagne. "They thought I made poor decisions and I was not as good or approachable as my father was. He had the touch, I did not. I do not understand how to bond, I cannot seem to find a way in. It was like we had no common language… But after I found you - or you found me -, you helped me to figure out horses. And by hiring you, they saw that I had a vision and that I could make decisions that could benefit the whole team. They respect me more now, they talk to me more openly. Now we are a team not ruled by fear but by comprehension. And horses are the language we all speak, they are what reveal the true nature of us. I know it might feel silly to you now, but you have taught me social skills - with people and with horses. I am still clumsy, I admit, but I am finding my way."

"It's not silly. I get it it", Amy assured and scoffed then as she recalled something. "Actually, that's pretty ironic thing of you to say. My sister, Lou, has always told me I don't get people, that I'm better with horses. Maybe I'm better with them, but at least I'm not as hopeless with people as she says - I mean this must prove it", she said gesturing toward the space between them. "People just make… things more complicated than they'd have to be. I like it when I'm in control and aware."

Ahmed nodded, witnessing how Amy was getting lost in her thoughts.

"Do you miss them? Your family", Ahmed asked then. Amy took a sip from her glass of bubbly, thinking about the question. She often thought of them at night when it got quiet, but didn't get far with her thoughts before sleep took over. It felt like they were living on different astral planes, not really aware of each other but still existing at the same time.

"I guess. I do miss some things more than others, but I haven't really been homesick in a while. I guess I'm too busy to feel it. I really miss my horse, Spartan, though. I can't just call him and ask how he's doing, like I can with the rest", Amy's mouth curled in a smile. "He must wonder where I am."

"You think horses can think like that? Be so aware of things?"

"Yeah, of course. Maybe not like us, but I think they're very aware of things, sometimes more than we are", Amy spoke, making Ahmed nod and wonder about it. "Speaking about my family… Ahmed, before I make any decision concerning my future here, I would like to go and visit Heartland."

"Oh…?" Ahmed seemed worried for a minute.

"Yeah. No matter the decision, I need to settle few things. I rushed out so quickly back in December, and it was fine because it was only for four months, but this could be… for years", Amy explained. "My life is still partly there."

"But I could provide you anything you need. Anything", Ahmed reminded, enthusiastic look in his eyes.

"It's not material I'm after, Ahmed", Amy was patient with him, "it's my family. I need to see them. I wouldn't feel right just continuing doing this without talking to them first. I had commitments back home, a life before this. So I can't just drop everything for good. Maybe things are not gonna fall apart without me, but I need to… wrap things up before I can move forward."

"I guess I understand", Ahmed claimed. "I saw how your family loved you… when you had that accident", he still carried guilt over it, even though Amy had said they were okay and he wasn't responsible for Adrian's reckless behavior.

"Yeah… They really do…" Amy nodded.

It was almost hard to believe not even six months had gone by since spooked Zeus had kicked Amy on the head and sent her close to a fatal condition. But after the accident, things had slowly picked up and finally Amy had to make a conscious decision to let the flow take her wherever it would take her. If she had tried to control everything, it might have burned her out. Life always had a way of working things out, she only needed to grab the opportunities by the horns. "They're pretty amazing. I'm lucky to have them", Amy smiled. She realized Ty had been the one looking after her the most, and even though things were now awkward between them, she would never stop appreciating everything he had done for her then - or ever. Now that dust was slowly settling, she felt like breathing again. Hopefully Ty would also land on his feet, he deserved it. "And that incident taught me that every moment is precious. That's why I'm here, following my calling."

"Well you did say you wanted to move forward and it is why I offered you this job in the first place. I hope that it is still what you need to reach the goals you have set for yourself", he reminded her. Amy smiled with appreciation and they clinked their glasses before taking sips.

The next day, Amy was back in the arena, working hard. The rider, however, was hardly working. She figured it was the alcohol he had consumed last night. Letting her frustration show through long sighs, Amy was following him on his horse, Emperor. They were jumping okay, but not well enough.

"Elbows…" Amy yelled at the rider some instructions. "That's better…"

"How is he doing?" Ahmed walked behind Amy and looked at the rider going over the jumps. Amy glanced at the prince, quickly returning her eyes to the horse so she wouldn't miss anything important.

"You can see for yourself… If I didn't know any better, I'd say the guy's a lousy jumper. The horse is great, but he makes Emperor question everything. And - he's constantly landing on his neck." Amy didn't like telling Ahmed bad news, but she knew she had to be honest with him about the way things were going or otherwise he'd be surprised to find out the truth in the competition. "Last night might have taken a toll on him."

"Free alcohol has a tendency to do that to people", Ahmed commented, making Amy laugh a little.

"You're right about that…" she shook her head, feeling happy that she wasn't struggling with a hangover today. She then raised her voice. "Okay, one more, then we're done." Amy figured it was better to put the horse out of his misery, because it seemed like the rider wasn't going to improve any more than this. She followed the lap closely, counting the hoof beats inside her mind, soon noticing that the rider's approach was off. "No, stop, stop!" she yelled.

But it was too late. It all happened in slow motion; the rider made the jump, the horse flew across the air, the poles dropped, and eventually Emperor landed, badly, making him neigh in pain.

"Oh my god", Ahmed breathed, feeling his heart race faster as he witnessed how Emperor lost his balance and threw the rider to the ground. Amy was already rushing toward the ring along with few stable hands, while Ahmed was frozen in fear.

"Are you okay?" the hands ran to the rider who was curled up on the dust, grunting out words between shallow breaths. Amy on the other hand was slowly approaching the horse. She studied to see if Emperor was hurt and as the gelding was trying to fly, Amy saw he wasn't putting weight on one of this legs.

"It's okay, boy… You're gonna be okay…" Amy assured him, trying to remain calm. She kept her eyes on the horse, reading every cue he was giving her and then slowly touching his neck so she could get the reins. "Easy… easy…"

As Amy checked the horse again, she realized this was almost identical with the accident Spartan had had. She could feel the knots in her stomach all over again, knowing that this might be it for Emperor.


	23. Chapter 23

"Amy… is he okay?" Ahmed approached Emperor and Amy after things had settled a bit. The horse yanked the reins, afraid to be around anyone but Amy, but her hold was thankfully so firm that she was able to keep the gelding under control.

"Easy, boy… Easy…" she spoke softly, taking time to calm down Emperor with long strokes. "Ahmed, get the vet", Amy ordered monotonically, not letting her eyes leave the horse. It was important to be aware of his movements right now.

"What happened? Did he got hurt?" Ahmed inquired.

"It's his leg. I think it might be… broken…" Amy said, feeling a cold grip take a hold of her heart as she said it out loud. It could be something less dramatic or worse, but the fact that "broken leg" seemed like a compromise at this time didn't make Amy feel at ease.

"That can't be good", Ahmed figured.

"No. It's not. So, get the vet, quick", she repeated, feeling that the longer they waited, the worse things could got.

After some minutes, Ahmed returned with the vet. Meanwhile, Amy had her hands full with Emperor when the horse thought about fleeting and was putting weight on his sore leg for that very same reason. When he realized it was going to hurt, it made him even more aware about the unsafe position he was in. Amy had to make him trust her.

"What happened?" the veterinarian asked, arriving with his kit. Emperor didn't like the way the man walked up to him, so he pulled his head up, making Amy almost lose her balance.

"Hey, hey!" Amy told the horse. Ahmed came to assist her. "Easy, boy."

"Are you alright?" Ahmed asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine", she assured, while the horse was growing more restless.

"So, what happened? Were you the one riding him?" the vet repeated.

"No. It was Marco", Amy nodded toward the guy who was holding his side and standing up with the help of his team mates. "They approached the jump wrong and Emperor landed badly. Looks like his leg might be broken", she told him briefly.

The vet quickly examined the horse, then nodding in agreement.

"So it seems…" he murmured, thinking.

"Is it serious?" Ahmed asked. "What I mean is, is it a death sentence?"

"I can't say yet. I have to take X-rays to know more", the vet spoke and took out a splint for the horse. "Can you help me get him to the stalls?"

"Of course", Amy nodded.

Amy was trying to keep Emperor's focus on her when the vet adjusted the splint in place. The horse was distracted, not sure what to pay attention to, and neighed nervously, but Amy was rubbing his neck gently throughout the whole thing.

"Okay, it's on", the vet said, closing his kit.

As they were about to leave to the stalls, Ahmed receded from the group and took long, determined strides toward Marco. Amy could tell his bad temper was back.

"Marco!" he yelled at the rider. "Do you have any idea what you've done?!"

"I'm sorry…" Marco tried. "I really am."

"Sorry will not cut it. Pack your bags and be out of here before sunset", Ahmed growled, then saying no more. He followed Amy and the vet inside, letting out puffs of anger.

"That was harsh… It's not like he did it on purpose…" Amy said, even though she too was disappointed with Marco. "These things happen."

"They should not just happen. Do you realize how much money and effort I've put into this horse? He is one of the best horses in the world, he had a real chance of winning. One wrong decision from Marco and he might have to be euthanized!" Ahmed went on, walking along to their slow pace.

"Keep your voice down", Amy said as the vet put Emperor into his stall. "Is that what it's all about to you: money, winning? What about the horse himself? Is he just a tool for you?" she pulled Ahmed to the side so they wouldn't have this argument around the jumpy horse. "Euthanizing him is the worse case scenario, he might still pull through."

"And what am I going to do with a horse that cannot jump? This is my business", Ahmed was getting even more upset.

"You could re-home him, sell him to someone who might give him the kind of life he needs", Amy suggested, making Ahmed scoff.

"After putting thousands of dollars into his rehabilitation. I would only lose more money."

"I can't believe how little compassion you have", Amy was hurt. "And if you really want to learn something from me, from what I do, then here's a lesson for you: owning and training horses might be your business, but you should never treat them like they are not living, breathing creatures with value that can't be counted in money. We don't know what's going on yet, so don't jump into any conclusions. And that's really hypocritical of you to talk about money when you've never had to struggle with it and you're spending it on fancy cars, side trips and designer clothes. If you are worried about money, then I can pitch in, even if I don't have much. But that's what you should always do - give your best, give your everything. I never give up on a horse, not until I know it's really over. And this is not over, not yet. Now, if you'll excuse me."

She left Ahmed standing there, hoping he would think what she had just said.

Amy felt so upset by Ahmed's behavior, that she had to have some time for herself. She could have expected this from the man he had met almost a year ago, the one with sexist and condescending attitude, but since then Ahmed had shown improvement in understanding horses and even people - her especially. Apparently there were still some things that were harder to shake: the prince thought everything through fame and fortune, but that was not the way Amy worked. Sure, the money helped and yes, the fame was nice, but that was not why Amy was in this. She wanted to keep the horses in the center, their well-being always as her first priority. The business side of it had never appealed to her, it was just "the necessary evil" so she could keep doing what she was doing. A lot of people were in this business for wrong reasons, so Amy wanted to be the change she wanted to see in the world. Business and horses could mix, but ideally it wouldn't have to be in the expense of the horses.

Walking outside to the fresh spring air, Amy let out a sigh. She closed her eyes and allowed the singing of the birds calm her down. It had been a while since her brain had just "went off". The excitement of the tour, the atmosphere and the people had made her almost an adrenaline junkie. To just be and relax was something she had always enjoyed, but now it felt wrong when there was so much to do. She figured that if she slowed down too much, everything would just crash on her and Amy was afraid of that happening because catching up with her choices was not something she wanted to do now. She just hoped that if she would keep up with the pace, things would work themselves out. But this accident had forced her to take a breather for a minute, revalue everything that was going on.

There were some occasions when she felt like foreign in this environment, like she was the odd one out. This was one of those. In Ahmed's protection, Amy had been able to do her thing without anyone interrupting her, but now, her protector was the one she was having problems with and she was left completely alone. During these moments Amy really missed Heartland, the way things were handled there. The little ranch had always been about compassion, humanity and living in harmony with the people, animals and nature. This world was something completely opposite and usually Amy just turned a blind eye on it, just trying to focus on the help she was giving.

It was then that Amy realized that she did miss Ty. Maybe they were not meant to be as a couple, but before they had been a couple, they had been friends. And they had continued to be friends even when they had been in and out of a relationship. Now, they were nothing but something that used to be.

Amy thought she might have been too rash in her decision to push Ty away. The way she had handled the break-up was like she was handling things here, but it was not how you handled relationships. Business maybe, but not relationships. It was almost strange to realize how fast her mind had switched into this way of thinking, as if she had not been aware of it until now and someone else had took over, leaving her to simply be a passenger on this crazy ride.

Maybe now she would have done it differently and not been so absolute about everything. They could have still remained friends even though the engagement was off. Amy missed the way they could talk about everything, she missed his advice. This was the kind of moment Ty would just get completely and Amy knew he would be there, by her side, fighting against the idea that horses were just game pieces in people's business ventures.

The feeling of emptiness only hit Amy there and then as she was forced to slow down: she had not lost only a partner, she had also lost her best friend.


	24. Chapter 24

Filling in the details on the pet information sheet, Ty was so lost in his work that he didn't event hear someone entering through the clinic doors. It was only when he saw a shadow from the corner of his eye that he realized he wasn't alone.

"Hey there", an old, familiar voice greeted him. Jack Bartlett stood in the doorway, taking off his outworn hat now that he was indoors and it was considered to be polite. Ty stood up, wondering what to do. Maybe a response would be a good place to start.

"Jack… hey", Ty felt nervous for some reason. He had not seen Jack since the man had been in his trailer few days ago with Lou, but Ty had left him a message through a voice mail just yesterday, explaining that he was taking Harley away from Heartland. Somehow he wasn't sure how to face Jack, because even though he was determined to cut Heartland from his life for the time being, he didn't know how to leave Jack behind. Ty didn't want to "arrange" one last meeting, because it would make things strange and color every action and every word, making it anything but natural interaction. The old man was like a father to him and he had always been there to make sure Ty was looked after, but now seeing his own emptiness reflecting through Jack's eyes was almost enough to make his plan crumble. Ty couldn't even count how many times Jack had helped him to believe in himself again, but this time he had to do it on his own. Jack had too many ties connecting him to Amy, which was exactly what Ty was trying to avoid. He wanted to be on his own, free from Amy, so he could find himself again.

"Uh… What brings you here?" Ty cleared his throat. Jack wasn't a usual guest at the clinic. It was also evident in the way he was looking around.

"Well, I was in the town and… I drove past this place. I saw your truck outside and… thought I'd drop by", Jack explained, fiddling his cowboy hat. "I got your message about Harley."

"Oh, good", Ty nodded. He wasn't sure how good Jack was with technology, but Ty didn't want to leave him a message inside the ranch house, because facing it all would have been too much for him right now. Sending it through Lou wouldn't have been good either, because even though Ty was trying to avoid Jack to some extent, he had wanted to deliver the message himself, one way or another.

Jack nodded too and for a minute they didn't say anything, but kept glancing at each other as they were trying to figure out what was the next move.

"You know you didn't have to do that", Jack said eventually. "Take Harley away. I know it must be hard now that you and Amy…" He let his words die. "But if it's causing you problems to find a place for him, or…"

"Actually, it's all good. He's at the rodeo fields with Shorty and Charger. And I'm thinking about selling him. Maybe Charger too. I'll see what Caleb has to say about that. Maybe I'll just sell him my half if he doesn't want to give the horse up", Ty explained, thinking out loud and making plans.

"Now, why would you do that? You love Harley", Jack asked.

"I know, but… I'm just getting busier and… he's getting more neglected, so…" Ty shrugged. "Seems only fair."

"You're sure this is not about Amy? Even a little?" Jack wondered. Ty sighed and strengthened his neck to meet the blow. Here she was again. Amy.

"Maybe a little", he admitted. "But mostly it's about me. And Harley. I need to move on."

"I get that", Jack nodded. "But you're not doing anything rash here, are you? They say you should never make life changing decisions when you're going through something big. You might end up regretting those things."

"It's not a rash decision. It's kind of like…" he was trying to come up with a good way to explain it, "I have to burn some bridges so I won't cross them again, if that makes sense."

"So, you're burning all the bridges that bring you back to Amy?" Jack guessed. Ty nodded silently. "I guess it means it's really over between you two then." Ty let his eyes drop.

"I need to do this, Jack, I hope you understand", Ty spoke.

"I'm trying to. I just hope you will take care of yourself too and not cut all the people out of your life, because while they might have entered into your life because of Amy, they stayed because of you. Because… well, if you're being very black and white about this, then all things here will lead back to Amy", Jack thought. "And maybe that's selfish of me to say, but I'm not ready to write you out of my life. I don't want to unknow you."

"I don't want to unknow you either, you really have been important part of my life here, and I owe you so much. I know I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you kicking my rear whenever I was being an ass", Ty said, creating a smile on the corner of Jack's mouth with his words. "So, I hope you understand that this isn't me being ungrateful to you, but choosing to do what's best for me right now. It might not be the easiest decision, but it's the right one. At least that's what I believe - or that's what I need to believe."

"Well, I'm proud of you, Ty, you must know that. It's not easy to make the tough decisions, especially when it comes to changing the life you know - trust me, I know. And maybe you've not realized it, but I didn't do this for you. You did it all for yourself and you continue to do it now too. I was simply right by you. And no one can take that power away from you. So give yourself some credit."

Ty nodded, holding back a choked up feeling. He had been so sure about everyone turning against him, but instead they hadn't. His body was slowly getting rid of the tension that he had been carrying with him for days now.

Ty walked to Jack and stretched his hand for him to shake. Jack eyed it quickly.

"Thank you for understanding, Jack. And this isn't me abandoning you, this is me trying to find my way", Ty wanted to explain one more time. "Kind of like when you left me on that crossroad few years ago. I need to see the other roads to know what they have to offer, but just know that… there's always that one road that leads me back home to you guys and it doesn't have any bridges to burn. I can always come back, right?"

"Of course. I told you it before and it'll never change. Family never does", Jack nodded. Ty smiled. "But I'm not gonna say goodbye. So this is only "until next time". And I'm not doing it with a handshake. C'mere."

Jack then wrapped his arm around Ty and pulled him closer into a hug. Ty laughed a little, patting the old man's back and thinking that it was only going to be a quick one, but after a while he realized he wanted to linger just a little while longer. Maybe this was going to be the only sappy moment he would allow for himself, because it was Jack and he had never lost his faith in him.

They heard a clearing of a throat, and both Ty and Jack loosened up their hands to see who was among them. Cassandra watched the men with a sarcastic smirk on her face.

"Sorry. Not to disturb your chick flick moment, but I'm here to let Ty go", Cassandra said and awkwardly entered the room. She put down her bag on the table and whipped her hair into a messy ponytail. Jack and Ty both shifted back from each other, then checking if things were now good with them and after that nodded in agreement.

"So… take care of yourself", Jack said one last time, not knowing how to end this. Ty wasn't sure of that either. The older man squeezed his shoulder, giving him encouragement.

"You too", Ty replied. Jack put the hat back on his head and turned around. When the door closed behind him, Cassandra was all over Ty with questions.

"What was that about? Is he okay?" she worried a little, but kept her tone familiarly snarky.

"Yeah, he is. We were just, uh… saying goodbye", Ty explained and returned to his seat to finish the info sheet. Cassandra frowned and checked the latest patient files.

"He going somewhere?" she asked absentmindedly, trying to catch up with what had happened since her last shift.

"No. I am."

"Again? Weren't you just in France?" Cassandra sighed in frustration, glaring at his colleague. "I swear to God, if I'm gonna have to do all your shifts again–"

"No. I'm not leaving country or anything like that", Ty zipped her. "I'm moving out from the trailer."

This was the first time he had said it out loud, not even Caleb knew yet. The thing Jack had said about everything here leading back to Amy was true, because he had known her since day one and therefore everything had Amy written all over it. So Ty needed to start fresh in a place that didn't remind him of her at all.

"Really? When? Where are you moving to?" Cassandra was surprised.

"I don't know yet. Just… out", Ty spoke briefly and then changed the subject. "I'm gonna finish this sheet and we'll then go through the files together. There are few new pets that you need to know about."


	25. Chapter 25

When Amy Fleming had stepped inside that helicopter last December with Prince Ahmed Al Saeed, one the things she had thought about was that as much as she was excited about the tour, she also couldn't wait to get back. Back to Canada, back to her people, back home. But when she stepped out of an Uber four months later, that feeling felt like a distant memory. Amy was excited to be back, but mostly she was terrified to face it all at once. Her country, her people, her house.

As she looked around, Amy noticed everything looked pretty much as she remembered, except this time there was no snow on the ground and no one at the yard. But a season had changed since then and it was now spring, which was ironic considering spring was thought to be a start of something new - which was exactly what Amy was facing now as well. She knew most of the details back from home, like how Georgie was training hard to get into the Extreme Team, how Lou and Peter were now attending to couple's counselling or how Lisa was suddenly spending a lot more time at Heartland, but it would be an entirely different thing to see them with your own eyes, let alone fit them as a part of your not-so-new-but-at-the-same-time-new daily routine. And even if she was only one foot in, something already felt off and Amy wasn't sure what it was. But no amount of staring would tell her the answer, because for her to know what had changed, she would've had to look into her heart.

"Amy…?" Lou walked out of the ranch house to the fresh spring air, looking astonished to see her sister back home. Part of her couldn't believe Amy was finally here, but the thing that mostly threw her off was the way Amy had changed physically; her clothes looked more sophisticated and her posture had become more noble. Amy turned around upon hearing a familiar voice and brought her eyes from the Rockies to Lou. "I thought you said you weren't going to be back until tomorrow?!" The older sister quickened her steps and rushed to hug Amy.

"I know, but I thought I'd surprise you all", Amy laughed and wrapped her arms around Lou who made a high squeal of excitement. "Aw, I've missed you", the younger sister sighed.

"It's so good to see you, Amy, you have no idea!" Lou cheered.

"You too. How are you?" Amy then asked and loosened her grip so she could took a better look at the woman in front of her. "You've cut your hair!"

"Ha, speak for yourself! You've been through a complete make-over", Lou eyed her from head to toe. All her life she had been begging for Amy to go shopping with her, but had had no luck. Seemed like those times were about to change now. "And I'm good, by the way, in the middle of preparing your homecoming party. So, you kinda blew the whole thing", she crinkled her nose in a playful manner, making Amy laugh.

"Oh god, no more parties, please. I think I've had enough of those for the rest of my life", Amy said.

One thing she had never really liked while being in France had been the celebrations. Even if she had changed during her trip, being an introvert was something that just couldn't be shaken off, no matter how many times she had tried - and she had tried, because being an extrovert would have made things much easier for her. You could train yourself to live among extroverts, but Amy had noticed that that part of her core would never change.

"Can you help me with the bags?"

"You sure you don't already have your driver to do that…?" Lou asked, because the man who had been driving the Uber was already on his way inside. Amy looked after him and sighed.

"I told him I didn't want any special treatment… But does he listen? Of course not…"

"Well, enjoy it while it lasts", Lou shrugged and pulled Amy beside her so they could get inside. "Because you're not getting any of it here."

"It's kind of strange", Amy said when she was removing her jacket a moment later, "you never really realize how your home smells like until you've been away for a while", she thought. "Like, horses smell the same everywhere but… nothing smells like this."

"Huh… I guess I've never thought about it", Lou hummed and looked around. She had done her fair share of traveling, but something else - than a smell of a house - had always taken her attention when she had came back. Lou figured Amy was more sentimental in things like this.

"So… where's everyone?" Amy wondered when the house looked empty and sounded almost silent. She didn't want to say it out loud, but she was secretly pleased they weren't there to pester her with questions right after her arrival. One person at a time was more appealing to her.

"Well, Granpa's somewhere with dad, I guess they're checking the fences or something, Georgie's at school and Peter's - where else than - Vancouver. So, it's just me for now", Lou smiled. "You hungry?"

"Uh, not really", Amy shook her head. "But, thanks."

Amy walked inside, leaving her bags to be for a while as she took it all in. "Wow, nothing's changed… It's like time's stood still here."

"I guess four month's not that long time after all", Lou said, following Amy around. She tried to see what Amy was seeing, trying to remember if anything had in fact changed but Amy had not just realized it. Memory could easily play tricks with the mind.

"I feel like I could be away for 10 years and everything would still look like this", the younger sister thought. She then yawned and covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh… I feel a bit tired… You don't mind if I take a nap, do you?"

"Amy", Lou laughed. "You're home now. You don't have to ask permission to go to sleep. Just… well, make yourself home. Literally."

Amy smiled absentmindedly.

"Yeah, I guess. Sorry, I just didn't want to seem rude since I just got here", Amy said, going back to her bags. "We can catch up later?"

"Sure. You just rest. I'll wake you up for dinner, okay?"

"Sounds good. Thanks", Amy took her bags and dragged them to her room. Even though she knew she was at home, she still felt careful about everything. Like everything here wasn't just as much hers all of a sudden.

Pushing the door open, Amy was greeted with a room that belonged to a little horse crazy girl and not a young business woman who had just returned from an Equine Tour from Europe. Some adjustments need to be made, Amy thought as she entered.

The decorations and patterns in curtains and sheets highlighted the fact that she had grown out from a lot things in four months and her life was in need of a serious update. Looking around, she also noticed trails of Ty. The horse painting on the wall, their pictures by the mirror and the hoodie she used to sleep with when she missed Ty. Amy had hoped that she would be able to come back to Heartland and not meet Ty, but of course he was everywhere without actually being there.

Amy put down her bags and closed the door behind her, then sighing. She felt trapped already, like her room was a cage she was closing herself in. She could no longer just come and go as she pleased, she would have to answer about everything to Jack. Amy hadn't been stupid enough to think she was going to settle down without a problem right away, but the overwhelming twist in her chest felt too much already. She had tried to act cool around Lou and apparently done a good job with it since nothing had raised red flags, but she still had to face everyone else and it was just too much to think right now. There were expectations and Amy didn't know if she was going to meet them.

Collapsing on her bed, Amy closed her eyes. She felt bipolar thinking that part of her just wanted to just relax and put on "ranch clothes", yet some other part was telling her to just cling on to her European clothes. Amy wasn't sure which identity felt more appropriate right now because she wasn't in a posh mansion in Europe anymore, but she wasn't the cowgirl she used to be either.

As she was going through parts of what she thought made her identity, trying to tell which thing belonged to which side, Amy slowly fell asleep. And she didn't wake up until there was a knock on the door hours later.

"Amy…?" Lou whispered through the crack in the door.

"Hmhn…?" Amy frowned and squinted her eyes, wondering where she even was. In the dim light she could tell familiar objects were surrounding her and Lou's figure was by the doorway. Home, she thought, I'm home.

"Dinner's ready", Lou said. "You wanna come and eat?"

Amy sighed, wondering if she was even feeling hungry.

"I'm really tired, Lou…" Her tiredness was bigger than her hunger.

"Are you sure? Everyone's excited to see you. Even dad's here."

"Maybe later… I just wanna sleep, okay?" Amy mumbled, turning on her side. Lou watched as her sister, still fully clothed in her designer clothes, rolled on the bed. It spoke volumes about the exhaustion in her mind and she then pulled back. "Okay. Sleep well", Lou said and shut the door behind her.

Amy could hear the footsteps distancing from the door and then, voices.

"She's not coming. She said she was tired."

"But she has to eat, right?"

"Yeah, but… she'll come when she'll come. She's been keeping busy for four months now, the tour's been hectic and the flight was pretty long… No wonder she needs some r'n'r."

"Lou's right. We should give her some rest. She's back for good and we're gonna see her every day from now on, so one more night won't make much difference. Now, let's eat."

Amy opened her eyes and stared at her room without actually seeing anything. She thought about Grandpa's words; he wasn't completely off about her being back, but Ahmed's offer still stood: she was welcome to come back to Europe if she really wanted. And if things didn't start to go well here, Amy wouldn't hesitate to take up on that offer.

At least she knew what she was dealing with over there. Here… not so much. Everything familiar suddenly felt foreign to her.


	26. Chapter 26

The next morning, Amy was awake long before anyone else. Even Jack wasn't up and sipping his coffee like he always was at the crack of the dawn, but Amy suspected having Lisa over might have kept him bound to his bed longer than usual.

After taking a quick shower, she changed into new set of clothes, choosing her team gear from her bags - that were still unpacked on her floor -, feeling better when she approached this all like it was her work. Except, today she wasn't actually going to work at all. Today was going to be all about getting back to the saddle - literally. She had never been away from saddle this long for such a long period of time. During these last four months, Amy had mostly spent time on the side of the ring, longing to be on the saddle herself, but with the busy schedule, riding a horse had been the lowest of her priorities.

When Amy opened the barn door, four set of heads poked out from the stalls to greet her. Without even realizing it, her mouth curved into a smile. Maybe it wasn't so bad here, maybe things were going to settle back just fine. She had her horses after all. Horses always helped.

"Hey, Paint… Phoenix… Copper…" she greeted them all before going to her own horse, Spartan. The black gelding was eyeing her suspiciously, recognizing something familiar, but still unsure if it really was Amy. "Hey, boy… Look at you. You've gained weight", she noticed immediately. Amy had had strict rules about Georgie riding Spartan; first and foremost because he was Amy's horse and they shared a special bond he didn't have with anyone else, which was why he could test the person if the one handling him wasn't familiar with his quirks and tricks. The second reason was his injured leg. After Spartan's accident, Amy had only done lighter exercises with him and he needed more rest than any other horse.

But this was too much rest.

Spartan pulled his head back to the stall and Amy let her shoulders drop. "What? You're not even gonna say hello?" Turning his dock toward her was the horse's reply. "You're mad at me for being away for so long, aren't you?" Spartan acted as if she wasn't even there. "Alright… Be that way. But I'm getting your brushes now and I'll force you to socialize with me - whether you like it or not. Maybe you've not missed me, but I've missed you."

Feeling rejected, Amy walked to the chest where they kept all the brushes and dug out Spartan's box, noticing that something was missing. There was a big empty space right next to Spartan's brushes, meaning some other horse's brushes were not at their usual place. Maybe Georgie had forgotten to put Phoenix's stuff back or something, Amy thought, but when she went through all of the boxes quickly, she realized whose box was really missing.

Harley's.

Her thoughts hovering on Harley, his brushes and whereabouts, Amy returned to Spartan and opened the stall door. But butting into his personal space made the horse flat his ears and raise his leg as a sign of warning.

"Hey, what's going on with you?" Amy growled and set the brushes aside, feeling frustrated with Spartan's mood swing. Maybe too little activity had made him cranky. "Okay, you and me, round pen, now." Amy opened the barn's back door and took Spartan's lead before opening his stall and standing in the middle of the aisle so she could guide him to the chute that would lead him to the pen. Spartan jolted out and trotted to the pen and Amy followed quickly after.

After closing the gate, Amy walked to the middle of the pen and watched the horse move. Spartan was keeping an eye on her, watching her as she spun along with him. His leg seemed a bit stiff, but not too bad and Amy tried to take that off of her list of things that needed checking. When Spartan had made few laps, Amy decided to cut his run by extending her arm with the hand that was holding the lead, forcing him to run to the opposite direction and showing him who really was the boss here.

Minutes passed, but Spartan didn't show any sign of surrender. Amy could feel her forehead getting sweaty and her cheeks red as she kept running, cutting and giving him signals. She noticed she was also very out of shape.

"You know there's only one way to end this and it's gonna be my way", Amy told the horse and his ears moved toward her. He was listening, but Spartan wasn't going to give up easily and he made it known. Amy felt the frustration building up inside of her.

"You're up early", Amy could hear Georgie's voice as the girl climbed up the pen's rails. Amy only shot a quick glance toward her niece before bringing her eyes back to the horse. The tension between her and her horse was intense and Amy felt like any distraction might blew up the connection at this point.

"Same goes for you", Amy said.

"I'm on my way to the trick-riding rehearsals", Georgie said. "Seems like you're settling okay, already back at the barn and all."

"Well, don't know about that", Amy scoffed when she was obviously doing a lousy job at it. "How have things been here? How's Spartan been? Anything to report?"

Georgie pondered about the answer for a minute and then shook her head.

"Not that I can think of. He's been his usual self. Why?" Georgie asked and followed Spartan's canter. She had been excited about getting more responsibility and time with the horses and was hoping to get a little praise from Amy because of it.

"He seems more stubborn than usual", Amy commented, changing Spartan's direction again. She kept close eye on his mouth, because that was where the first sign always came from. But so far there was nothing that would indicate her that he was ready to join up anytime soon.

"Maybe it's just the pain of re-entry", Georgie wondered and climbed back down. Amy frowned at Georgie's choice of words. Since when she had become so mature? "You know, you haven't seen each other for a while and he's just getting used to you again", she suggested.

"Maybe…" Amy said.

"Anyway. I gotta run. We'll talk more later?" Georgie hoped.

"Yeah, okay. Have fun", Amy said before Georgie rushed toward her bike.

Few minutes later, Spartan was moving his ears and licking his lips, giving Amy some hope about joining up. Amy walked to the middle of the pen and stood still. Her back was facing the horse, that way allowing Spartan to slow his pace. She waited and after a little while heard lazy hoof beats drumming the sand. A relief washed over her; she had did it.

"There we go", Amy spoke more softly and turned around, only to see Spartan jump to the side like he was playing tag with her. The horse then returned back to the side trail, going back to trotting like nothing had happened. "What the heck was that?!" Amy stood and watched as the horse kept playing hard to get.

Was Spartan being difficult or was she losing her touch?


	27. Chapter 27

After having an unsuccessful hour with Spartan, Amy came back inside, huffing like there wasn't any other way to shake her annoyance away. She kicked off her boots and opened her jacket to let out some heat that was building up inside of her, and with the sounds she was making, Amy caught Lisa's attention. The older woman was in the kitchen, making orange slices for breakfast, as her (newly wed) husband was preparing them some coffee.

"Oh, look who it is!" Lisa noted, her voice making a high squeak of excitement. She checked to see Jack's reaction, knowing already how excited the man was going to be about this. Jack turned around, almost feeling his heart skip a beat when he realized he was finally able to hold Amy again after being apart from her for months.

Amy walked into the kitchen, trying to act polite even though it was hard when she didn't really feel like talking to anyone right now. "And look at you! You really fit the part of the world famous horse trainer", Lisa couldn't help but admire Amy's clothes that had changed since her departure. Amy was still amazed how everyone thought she looked so different now, since she had already gotten used to her new style.

Jack walked to his granddaughter and wrapped his arms around her, giving her temple a soft kiss. Amy made an attempt to smile, but the expression died as quickly as it had appeared. "Amy", Jack almost laughed when he was so happy holding her. "Didn't know you were up already. And we were trying to be so quiet so we wouldn't wake you up."

"She must still be in France time", Lisa knew it from the experience and shot Amy a warm, welcoming smile.

"How are you? Did you sleep well?" Jack worried and guided Amy further into the room. She sighed, not sure what to tell them. This was one of the things she had feared: everyone expected her to be all chipper, but she wasn't going to lie to them about how she really felt - everything was confusing enough as it was.

"I slept okay", she announced first. "Something's wrong with Spartan. I was trying to work with him in the pen and he was just– argh, so annoying!"

"Oh?" Jack looked at her with a worried face and caressed Amy's arm.

"Well, maybe he's feeding of your energy. Have you eaten anything yet? If your blood sugar is low, you might get annoyed easier", Lisa suggested. Amy scoffed and gave Lisa a stink eye, leaving the kitchen because of the woman's indiscreet comment.

"Nice", she commented before going. Lisa watched after her with a surprised expression and then turned to Jack. He was equally perplexed.

"Wh–" was all Jack could say and he was about to follow her when Lisa put down her knife and pressed her hand gently on Jack's chest to stop him from going. "Let me handle this. I made the comment, I deal with the mess. Okay?"

Jack hesitated, but nodded. Amy and Lisa were both adults, so it wasn't like he had to babysit them while they would have their conversation, even though it was hard to just sit back and hope they'd both want the same harmonious living as he did. But Jack decided to trust his wife.

"Okay. Just… be understanding. She's going through a lot", Jack reminded.

"I know, I will", Lisa assured and then followed Amy to her room.

"Knock knock", Lisa said before entering Amy's room. The younger woman was in full storm speed, taking down things from her wall and putting them on a box. She didn't even bat an eye when Lisa walked into the room. "Sorry about that. I didn't mean it to sound so patronizing. I'm just worried. You should eat."

But when there was no response, Lisa decided not to push it anymore, so she just took a seat next to Amy's desk and crossed her legs, waiting until Amy was ready to accept her apology. Lisa didn't like to leave things half-done.

"Are you just gonna sit there and wait till I start talking?" Amy scoffed.

"It's working, isn't it?" Lisa cocked her brows and nodded toward Amy. The granddaughter shook her head and took down the pictures of her and Ty by the mirror. Lisa noticed that Amy was stripping the room of things that could be related to Ty. Maybe that was what this was about. "I heard about Ty. I'm really sorry."

Amy didn't respond.

"Is that what this is about?" Lisa guessed carefully. "Is everything okay?"

"I just…" Amy decided to speak, if only to shut Lisa up, "what am I doing here? What's my purpose in here?" she was hoping a crisis would turn Lisa away and she would get the peace and quiet she longed for. But Lisa wasn't scared.

"You mean in life in general or…?"

"No. Here, at Heartland", Amy let her arms drop onto her sides. "Everyone seems okay without me here. It's like… like I didn't even matter, like everyone just moved on."

Lisa thought about it for a minute.

"We had to, Amy. When someone leaves a hole behind, it's only natural to fill it with something so you can move on. People aren't made to just exist, we need to live. It doesn't mean you wouldn't matter. We are thrilled to have you back", Lisa spoke.

"Well, don't get too used to it, I might not stay too long", Amy murmured. Lisa glanced at the bags that were on the floor, still unpacked. Instead of unpacking, Amy had started to rearrange her room. It was pretty telling.

"You planning on going back…?" Lisa asked.

"I don't know. Maybe. I don't know", Amy repeated. Nothing was making sense, she was just following impulse after another. Lisa wondered about it.

"So you're feeling confused", she figured that much. "Well, let me tell you, it's perfectly normal. I think what you're going through is reverse culture shock."

"What does that even mean?" Amy asked and took down the horse painting Ty had given her. It was hard to fit into a box, but she tried. It wasn't like it was the first time…

"Well, it's kind of like when you go into a new culture and you experience this shock because everything's so different. Reversed culture shock is when you come back and you find things don't feel the same anymore", Lisa explained. "You're adjusting back to your primary culture and there are parts that you have forgotten, not necessarily voluntarily. Sometimes it's because you've grown while you've been away and you need to reinvent yourself. You think that's what's going on here?" she inquired carefully, trying not to send Amy into another fit.

"I don't know. I just… I feel weird being here. Like everything's changed, but not really", Amy finally sat on her bed, sighing and feeling a lump in her throat.

"Did you like it in Europe?" Lisa asked, feeling sympathetic about Amy's situation. She looked so sad with her pouty lip.

"Maybe… I don't know", Amy shrugged and lowered her gaze to her manicured nails. She felt helpless and that was something she had hidden underneath all her anger. Now it was finally coming out, because she was so weak and exhausted.

"I remember my first time away from home", Lisa was hoping her personal experience could help Amy too. "It was…" she tried to think a fitting word, "it was an intense ride. At first everything was fun, because, you know, there was new culture, new people, new places. That was so-called "honeymoon phase". But after a while, after few months, something shifted. I started getting frustrated with everything because… it wasn't like it had been back home. I couldn't rely on people like I could back in Canada, people misunderstood me all the time because of the language barrier and even the food started to taste bleak", she went on, finally engaging Amy. "But then I realized it was just about adjusting to the culture and it wasn't as hostile as I first thought it to be. So eventually I got a hang of things and mastered living abroad. I felt so grown up", she recalled, smiling about just how naîve she had actually been back then. "But then I came home and I felt like… I was lost again. I had to adjust back to my old ways, again, but I didn't really know if I wanted to. It was like I had left parts of my heart all over the world, so I didn't feel whole anywhere. It took some time before I learned to switch between these personalities that I had whenever I was someplace else. For example, here, with your grandfather, I'm more relaxed than anywhere else, but in France, it's all about business. You might not even recognize me there", she laughed a little, making Amy smile while she was lost in thought. Maybe Lisa had a point. "It doesn't mean I would be fake or I wouldn't know who I am. There are just parts of me that only come out in certain places or around specific people. It's all about accepting that. So, all I'm saying, give yourself time. Explore the feelings that you have, because they are telling you about something. You might not know yet what they are, but you'll find out eventually, I'm sure."

Lisa stood up, thinking she would now leave Amy to be as she had said what she had wanted to say and thought Amy had a lot to digest right now.

"And when you're ready, we'd love it if you could join us for breakfast and tell us all about your trip. We've missed you, we really have. It hasn't been the same without you", Lisa said and walked toward to the door.

"Thanks, Lisa", Amy said, sincerely.

"No problem. If you wanna talk, I'm here", Lisa assured. "Just be more gentle with yourself. And I didn't mean the comment about Spartan in a bad way, but you know how sensitive horses can be. If something's weighting you down, they will let you know. But isn't that the beauty of them?"

Amy nodded, agreeing. "Yeah, it is."

"Anyway. Get settled, and when you're ready, we are gonna be just down the hall", Lisa said and closed the door behind her.

Amy sat on the bed and fixed her eyes on the box that had Ty's things in it. Maybe it wasn't just a culture shock she was going through, but a heartbreak as well. Just because she had left Ty, it didn't mean that she was okay with it all. There were still some things that hadn't caught up with her - like how she was going to go on without Ty when he had been such a big part of her life all these years.

Would she just have to cover up the hole just like everyone here had done? How did they even do that? How did one get over someone? Or did you? Did you just fake it until it didn't bother you so much anymore?


	28. Chapter 28

"So…?" Jack didn't even wait till Lisa was back at the chopping board to hear what had happened in Amy's room. The woman gave her husband a quick glance, then getting back to slicing, wondering what she could say. They shared a lot of things with Jack, but for some reason Lisa wanted to keep the conversation with Amy somewhat confidential, if only to prove that she was trustworthy, even if the granddaughter wouldn't even know the difference. But she would, and that was why Lisa chose her words carefully.

"Well, she's definitely going through something. It's not like I didn't know that already based on what you and Lou have told me, but she's… somehow distant, hard to figure out", Lisa was trying to describe the feeling she had had while being with Amy in her room. "So I just talked about some things that might make her think about everything. I know she's a good girl, I have faith in her, so even if it seems like she's abandoned some things right now, people don't just change like that completely. And knowing she's a lot like you, she's bound to come back eventually. I don't know what the root of the problem is, but something tells me she doesn't either. But that's for her to figure out. She's definitely trying to move on from Ty. Whatever happened with them?" Lisa frowned and piled the oranges to a plate before waving her hand right by her head. "You know what, don't tell me. I feel like all this keeping secrets and going behind backs is getting too much for me as it is. If people want me to know something, they'll tell themselves."

"What are you saying…?" Jack asked and came to the table with the toast.

"Well, I know we agreed we'd tell everyone about our wedding when Amy gets back", Lisa's voice was now lower, almost like a whisper, "but with everything's that's going on… maybe the timing isn't right for that."

"You realize this is you talking? And not me, being stubborn about things?" Jack had to say it, because he was always hearing about how he was against things by default or he was too stubborn to face a difference, but now it was all coming from Lisa and that way it made things more even with them.

Jack also couldn't help but feel relief that Lisa shared the feeling he already had; ever since Amy's departure, Jack had been careful not to reveal that he had married Lisa without telling anyone (not even Tim, but that bugger had found out anyway by snooping around). At first it had been about not wanting to steal Amy's thunder and then it was because the whole family wasn't around to hear the announcement, and for Jack, that was really important. But the longer time went on, the harder it was to find the right time. Now that Ty and Amy had broken off their engagement, Jack thought announcing their marriage would come of somewhat gloating. For these past months, and especially now that Amy was back, he had been threading Lisa to bring up the topic and him having to be the difficult one - again.

But now, the tables had turned.

"I do", Lisa said, recognizing the tone is Jack's voice, "but I guess I just want to be sensitive and reasonable about this. The timing has to be right. Maybe it's selfish of me, but I want people to be happy for us. But now, the atmosphere is just… not that happy. Besides, Amy needs us now."

"Hmm, I agree", Jack nodded. "But… it doesn't matter whether we make the announcement or not, because you're still my lovely wife even if nobody knows about it", he gave her a kiss. Lisa smiled, immediately feeling better.

"And you're my lovely husband", Lisa's eyes were almost in the shape of hearts.

Meanwhile, Amy sneaked out of her room and turned to knock on Lou's door. It was around the usual time her big sister woke up, so Amy figured getting her up few minutes earlier wasn't going to do that much damage.

"Lou… Can I come in…?" Amy said through the door.

"Yeah…" Lou's sleepy voice answered. Amy then entered and gently closed the door behind her. The older sister was lying on her back, her eyes closed and chest slowly heaving up and down. It seemed like she had fallen back asleep within seconds after answering.

"You asleep?"

"No… I'm just resting my eyes…" Lou assured. Amy pulled up the cover next to her and adjusted her body onto the Peter's side of the bed. "What is it…?"

"I feel… heavy. Like there's too much gravity in my body", Amy spoke, trying to put into words what she was feeling.

"What do you mean…?" Lou asked, frowning, her eyes still closed even if she was listening. Amy swallowed down the lump in her throat.

"Like ever since I came back… things just felt much more real than they did in Europe. I think I'm only now realizing that I actually broke up with Ty", Amy spoke, wondering if this was crazy since it had already been two months since she had handed her ring back to him. But in Europe, she had had blinders on: only what happened there and then mattered. "That the life I had planned for years is not something I can come back to because it's not gonna happen without Ty."

Lou opened her eyes and turned on her side, watching her sister with a concerned expression. She could see tears in the corner of Amy's eyes and her nose was making sniffling sounds. It was obvious she was upset.

"Back then I just figured it would be for the best for us to go separate ways… He was there, but he hated everything that Europe presented. If that was going to be my future, how could I have him by my side if he wasn't ready to support me while I was living my life that way? We promised we were going to do things together, he promised to support me no matter what", Amy went on.

"But he did. He came to Europe to support you", Lou explained.

"He was supporting the old me, the person who left Hudson", Amy said. "But not who I had become. And I'm not mad at him. I'm not. Just… I didn't want to live like that. He wanted the dream we had back here, I wanted to see this through."

"So that's why you called it off?" Lou guessed. Amy nodded.

"I remembered what he once said to me; that he'd stand by me no matter what. And that promise he made was really important to me - you know how I've had hard time trusting anything ever since mom. But I trusted him. His promise made me feel safe, it made me feel good knowing that I could take that leap of faith and he'd be there with me, and that I could grow, knowing that he'd still have my back. But we grew apart somewhere along the way. I don't think neither of us expected that", Amy figured. "I'm not even sure when it happened."

"But did you try to work it out…? I'm just asking because for the longest time I felt like Peter and I weren't on the same page, like we had forgotten who we were and why we loved each other, but this couple's counselling, it's been helping a little bit. I feel like we were always so stubborn to make our own voices heard that we never really thought about what the other one was feeling. Like we were making noise just to stop ourselves from hearing what the other one was saying. It's really bizarre now that I think about it. So even if we felt like the other one was making some sense, we were too afraid to admit it. I remember thinking "if I give up now, he'll think I'll always just agree to everything". We were so proud. So eventually it wasn't a relationship anymore, it was this… war we were having. Which is ridiculous, because we were supposed to be married and in love, but instead we were just staying together because we were too afraid to change anything. But now we had to sit down and face each other, without interruptions and there was no escape", Lou confessed.

"We always try and try, but… I didn't see any reason for it anymore. Back in Europe, I didn't think I could come back to this", Amy said. "I seriously thought my life would go on like it did in France, but now I'm not too sure."

"What do you mean? You were thinking on staying, for good?" Lou tried to shake away the traces of sleep off of herself, because this was something she didn't want to miss. She had assumed Amy would just come back and everything would go back to normal, but now it seemed like things weren't as simple as she thought them to be.

"I was", Amy nodded. "Ahmed made me an offer, but it was before this thing happened…"

"What thing?" Lou immediately worried.

"With his horse", Amy began to speak, feeling her chest getting heavier again. "We were on top of the world, everything was going great, I thought I was really getting hang of things, but it all came crashing down. One of his horses was injured during rehearsals and he thought it might be better to have him euthanized. But I insisted, no, I fought for Ahmed to give the horse another chance, so he did. The surgery was risky, he pulled through, but… the horse was not the same. Ahmed spent thousands of euros on him, only to find out he wasn't performing right anymore and the quality of his life was… bad." The tears started to stream down Amy's face. "So eventually they had to put him down. He spent weeks looking after the horse and gave me more responsibility in return, only to have it all go to waste. I didn't feel very confident, especially when his staff started to turn against me, saying it was my fault we weren't doing better. So after four months, we didn't place well in the competitions and everything was just… chaotic. Everyone hated each other."

"Oh Amy", Lou said and stroked her tears away, "that wasn't your fault. Of course you tried whatever you thought was best. These things… are hard to predict, no matter how hard you work on them. But you're home now and the contract's off, right?"

"He's still waiting for my response", Amy said, sniffling. "I don't know why, but I feel like I owe him that… Like I need to make things right."

"But you're not going back, right? It was horrible, you can't put yourself in that position again, it's not healthy", Lou felt very protective of her baby sister.

"I don't know. I feel like I deserve it. Like it was what I committed to and I blew it… I let everyone down; myself, Ty, Ahmed, his staff, the horses, you guys… I ruined everything… Everything."

The crying was now coming out in full sobs. Lou hurried to hug her sister, promising to hold her until she'd feel better again.


	29. Chapter 29

Lou got dressed and helped Amy to the kitchen where she could prepare her some breakfast. At first the younger sister was about to refuse, but when she smelled the freshly toasted bread Lou was buttering for herself, Amy's stomach made a sound, letting her know that it had been too long since her last meal.

"So, why didn't you just tell us about everything that was going on in France?" Lou asked when Amy was finally nibbling her bread. She eyed the woman across the table, knowing that it was easier said than done - and Lou knew it too.

"Why didn't you tell us that you felt lonely in Dubai? Or that the book tour was a catastrophe?" Amy threw the question back at her.

"Okay, fair enough", the older sister admitted and poured Amy some tea.

"I didn't want you to think me as a failure", Amy explained further, thinking it was what Lou had gone through too. "When I decided to leave to Europe, you were all so supportive. You've always told me that I should step out of my comfort zone and when I finally did, in a big way, it ended up in a disaster. I felt like after all that hype, I was supposed to do better than I did. I realized something was off from the start, but I just kept telling myself that it was just me struggling to fit in", she went on, feeling her eyes still burning from the crying.

"But we could have helped", Lou shook her head, feeling bad for her sister. It was hard to imagine everything Amy had endured only because she didn't want to let them down. No shame was worth more than her sister.

"Maybe I needed to see it through, I don't really know", Amy was still figuring things out and trying to find some kind of purpose for all of this. "It's all kind of a mess in my head. It's like I was going through the motions that were expected of me. But maybe I was the one who built all the expectations for myself…"

Lou had been understanding about everything so far and Amy was slowly realizing it was probably going to be exactly the same with everyone else, if she just opened up to them.

"Well, one thing's for sure", Lou stated, "you're not going back. I won't let you go back. I know you told me that your place is somewhere out there, doing what you were doing, but it's not with Ahmed, not if it's like you described."

Amy nodded. Lou did have a point. Not everything had to be linked together; sometimes sum of its parts were actually greater than the whole.

"I think you might be right", she said, but felt knots turning inside of her. "I just… I feel like I owe him something. I feel so guilty…"

"Amy, you don't owe him anything", Lou wanted to be clear about that. "He invited you to do a job and you did it. That's it."

"I didn't do it very well…" Amy murmured, disappointed in herself.

"Well, let me ask you something", Lou said, finally sitting down when the food was on the table and the tea was in their mugs, "would there be any chance in the world that you would have allowed Ahmed to just euthanize the horse without even trying to save him?"

"Well… no", Amy admitted, shaking her head. "I had to try. I couldn't have lived with myself if I hadn't even tried."

"Exactly. So you tried, and unfortunately he didn't have the kind of ending you hoped him to have, but… you tried to save him. You gave him a chance. That's more than a lot of people would do", Lou explained and bit an apple. "And I'm sure with Ahmed's money he made sure that the horse was always treated with the best care, so that chance carried as far as it was meant to go for him. These things happen, you can't beat yourself up for it."

"But… he lost a lot of money. I ruined his business. I feel like I should give back my paycheck or something", Amy was still not willing to let it go.

"It's not like you forced him to it, right? He did it on his own", Lou reasoned. "He lives with his choices, just like you live with yours."

"Well yeah…" Amy nodded, agreeing. She knew she had a lot of tough choices to live with….

"So he can't blame you for that. If he does, then he's a major jerk", Lou spoke. "And the staff - I would have liked to see them in your boots. I bet it was not that easy to stand where you stood: going through all these changes, having this new role to carry, worrying about the horse… I feel sorry for them, actually. I would think the atmosphere in those kind of circles is not the best for friendships. Too many things interfere with money and business, you can't build a relationship on top of those things. Don't take it so personally, it was just business. People make money, people lose money, that's how it works. There are always risks and if Ahmed really is a business man, he knows it. A new year will come and they can try again", she shrugged. "You've never been about money, so don't start now. It'll ruin your life. It takes more than it gives."

"So… what do I do?" Amy asked. "I just… give up?"

"No, you're not giving up. You were there for four months, exactly as long as he asked you to. You finished the job, you did your part. You never gave up", Lou corrected her. "You said it yourself; you saw it through, but it didn't work for you, so it's time to move on to other things."

"I feel like such a coward, running away like this", Amy mumbled.

"You're not running away. You tell him that you want to stop working for him. That's it", Lou said, chewing her apple.

"But how do I tell him that? What if he's going to be mad?" Amy worried.

"Mad for what? This is business, Amy. Sometimes you negotiate, but nothing's a done deal until you have a handshake or a signature on paper. Don't take it too personally", Lou repeated, realizing why Amy had never been good with the business side of things. She was worrying too much about every little detail. Lou knew from experience that if you went down that road, you would burn yourself out in no time.

"So I just call him…? Tell him I'm not coming back…?"

Amy felt anxious even just saying the words to her sister, so how was she to do that when it came to Ahmed?

"Exactly. Don't make it more complicated than it is", Lou said. Amy nodded and then took out her cellphone from her pocket. She browsed the numbers, feeling a cold sweat pushing through. This was it. No going back.

The moment when her phone was dialing felt like an eternity. She paced back and forth, hoping it would help her to relax. Amy was going through what she was going to say, but as soon as Ahmed picked up, her mind went blank and her tongue got twisted.

"Amy, hello. You are home, I assume?"

"Yeah, hello, Ahmed. Yes, I'm back at home", Amy verified, trying to keep her voice calm, even though her hands were shaking and her mouth was dry. "Uhm, now that I'm here, I need to talk about our… deal." She set her eyes on Lou who was nodding in approval.

"Okay… I will be coming to Alberta in few days, we will arrange a meeting", Ahmed said. Amy froze. She had expected this situation to be over after this phone call, because facing Ahmed would make things even more difficult. But somehow her mouth was saying a different thing, probably out of fear.

"Uh… o-okay", Amy stuttered, cursing herself. She was supposed to end this - the sooner, the better. Her stress level was already off the roof as it was.

"Very well. I will get in touch with you then", Ahmed said and before Amy could say anything else, she heard a click from the other end. Ahmed had hung up.

"So…? How did it go?" Lou wondered, because she had not heard Amy say too much. Amy sat back down, feeling her knees getting weak. She was going to stress about this for those few days until Ahmed would finally get from France to here.

"He said we'll meet in few days", Amy explained.

"Okay… Will that work for you?"

"I guess it has to", Amy sighed and raked her fingers through her hair. "I just don't know how to face him…"

"Well, we have few days to prep for that", Lou tried to keep her sister calm. "Meanwhile, you just get settled and make sure you feel like this is exactly where you want to be. That'll make it easier for you to convince him too."


	30. Chapter 30

Instead of unpacking her bags like almost any other person would have done, Amy decided the best way to settle back in didn't happen through the house but through the barn. The roots of her problems laid inside those four walls and she needed some peace of mind before she could even think about moving on - to whatever direction.

Jack was feeding the horses after saying goodbye to Lisa who had went back to Fairfield to check if her business was in order after spending few days here at Heartland. The old man was humming a familiar song until he noticed Amy in the doorway.

"Amy. Feeling any better?" Jack said and threw the last sheet of hay to Paint.

"A little", Amy said. "Sorry about earlier."

Jack nodded, accepting her apology.

"So, how are you feeling now?" Jack wanted to know and took the broom so he could clean up the alley from hay and sand.

"I don't know. Like I have so many things going on, but I just don't know what to do with them", Amy shrugged. Jack had a thought and he quickly glanced at the broom in his hands.

"You know what always helps me in those kind of situations?" Jack asked. "Doing something concrete. I can see there's a lot of things going on in that head of yours, as it should, but it can be hard to get a hold of them when they are just thoughts. So, whenever I can't get a grasp of something, I turn it into something that I can. Like this dirt on the floor. I imagine they are the thing I'm trying to deal with. And this broom is the solution. Now, I know it might seem crazy, but after I focus on this thing and see that I can do it, the troubles in my mind seem easier to deal with, too. How about you give it a try?" Jack handed the broom to Amy. She looked at it, feeling a bit confused. How was she gonna think the dirt on the floor was her deal with Ahmed, her mixed feelings about Ty or her lack of connection with Spartan?

"I don't know if it's gonna help me, but I can clean up anyway", Amy said, grabbing the broom.

"So, what's bothering you then?" Jack asked and took of his gloves.

Amy didn't even know where to start, until he looked at Copper inside Harley's stall. He had noticed earlier all of Harley's things were gone: his groom kit, his saddle and bridle too.

"Where's Harley…?" Amy said and looked at Jack. His face immediately got more serious and the smile Lisa had created on his face earlier, stepped aside.

"Uh… Ty came and took him away", Jack replied. Amy nodded, feeling weird about it. She figured it made sense, but somehow it also made things more, as Jack would have said, concrete.

"Because of me…?" Amy guessed.

"I would say more like because of himself", Jack said, feeling a little nervous now that they were touching the topic that had been somewhat taboo with Amy after Ty's arrival back home. In fact, she had not even told about their break-up herself, they had had to hear it from Caleb who Ty had talked to. But Lou had let Amy know that they knew, so she had been off the hook. "Amy… I have to ask you something. Were you gonna tell us about Ty…?"

Amy looked down, wondering what to say.

"I realize it was your choice not to tell, I respect that. But it was awkward not to be aware of it. Ty's family. You're family. We didn't want to know because we'd like to pry. But breaking up, it's a big deal, one that's going to change your life. We wanted to be there for you, but we didn't even know we had to, because no one told us", Jack explained. "We had to hear it from Caleb."

"I guess I just… didn't really realize what I had done until I came here", Amy spoke. "Of course I could see it all happening, I said the words, but… when I was in France, Ty was just part of my life through texts and phone calls. He wasn't part of France. And when he came there… I realized just how much I had changed and how much he didn't belong there. So I did what I thought would be the best thing for us. Kind of like you and Lisa", Amy was hoping it would make Jack understand better. "You hated France, but you tried to please Lisa, because you knew it was important to her. But eventually you realized you wanted different things and it was better if you just went separate ways. It was a hard but fair thing to do."

Jack nodded. He had not heard Amy's side of things yet, just Ty's, so he appreciated her letting him in, even if he didn't expect for her to tell everything, only so much that he could support both Ty and Amy in whatever would happen next. One only understood someone if they knew their past.

"And when he left France, nothing felt that much different. Except… there were no longer texts or phone calls, but I guess I didn't have time to miss them because I was so busy with everything else. So in the back of my mind, nothing had really changed. He was in Heartland, I was in France. There was no reason to be sad, because… it was like this… illusion. I knew the facts, but what I saw wasn't that much different. There were nights when I told myself to cry, because it's what broken up people do. That crying would've meant that what I had with Ty had mattered to me - because it did. But there were no tears. It was like I was numb or my brain just couldn't make it… concrete", there was that word again, Amy noticed. "So telling you guys… I don't know. There was going to be expectations, I knew that much. You all would've expected me to be sad over it, but I just… didn't feel anything. It would have been like a story I would have told, but not had been invested in. And the further time went on, the weirder I felt about it. Like… why tell now when it happened days ago, you know. It's like these days every reaction has to happen immediately or you're not doing it right. I kept waiting for some kind of breakthrough, I kept waiting for the tears to come, so I could make that sad phone call and tell you that it was over between us. But it never came. Until I came home. And then there was no need for that phone call, because I was already here. And it felt stupid to be sad months later, because… why did it only happen now and not then. It just didn't make sense and I was scared because of it. Like maybe there was something wrong with me. At least now I know I can feel, but something was on hold."

"Sometimes things take time. People expect you to feel different things, but you can't just live by their expectations. Everyone reacts to things differently, because we are all different", Jack knew from experience. Everyone had expected him to be sad about Lisa leaving back to France after their break-up, but he too had felt nothing had really changed: Lisa was always in France and he was in Heartland. It wasn't until he had seen Lisa at the mailboxes that everything had hit him, hard. Seemed like the same thing was happening to Amy now too. Heartland was bound to bring back memories and feelings that France just didn't have.

Amy kept nodding, trying to face her feelings in a place where she felt most comfortable in but she had receded away from over these last few months. She looked around, feeling a tight hold around her neck from taking it all in; the smells that reminded her of everything, the noises that had always kept her safe and the horses that were just the same as they had been.

"I do miss him now, Grandpa", Amy confessed. "I miss our friendship, things he made me feel. I don't know what's going to happen to me, I'm really lost after all of this, but he knows exactly what he wants. And I think he deserves to have that, with or without me. I don't want to weight him down or keep him waiting. I need to sort my things out, it wouldn't have been fair to him to watch me this messed up. I'm not his responsibility." She could recall the times Ty had told about Lily and how he had almost been her guardian. How he still felt like he was the one who was supposed to make things right because he was her son. That was until he had realized that his mother was an adult and responsible for what she did for herself. He could help every now and then, but she couldn't expect him to be there to deal with all the consequences for her actions - Lily had to do it on her own. Amy didn't want to repeat that circle.

Jack had a sympathetic expression on his face. He felt Amy was somehow the same, yet somehow different. Like part of her was missing and something new had been added. As if her boots were bigger and life took its time to wait her to fill them up again. But that was how people grew. There were no miracles to make that happen, only time.

"You're gonna be fine", Jack was sure and caressed Amy's cheek. He could see she was a fighter, just like her mother. "Who knows; maybe you're gonna find your way back to him like I found my way back to Lisa. Or maybe you won't, but it's okay, too. It doesn't mean he wouldn't have mattered to you or wouldn't keep mattering to you, whether you have a relationship with him or not. You just sort your things out and eventually you will know exactly the place you're supposed to be at."

"Thanks, Grandpa", Amy said, through welled-up eyes. Even if she did not believe in herself right now, it was good to know someone did. Maybe it would give her courage to move forward and face the things only she could face on her own. Jack smiled warmly and left the barn to do other chores, feeling better knowing his granddaughter wasn't going to give up.

There were so many things Amy had to think about and deal with, but for now, she figured she could start by cleaning up the alley. She had to give it a try after the speech Jack had given her.

Maybe it would actually help. Or maybe it wouldn't. But you never knew until you tried.


	31. Chapter 31

"Hey, Amy!" Georgie greeted Amy while she was still sweeping the floor of the barn. The cement was as clean as it could be, but Amy still couldn't let go of it, hoping that some kind of illumination would come to her if she just kept on going.

The newest member of the Bartlett clan was back from her riding lesson, and even though it had taken a toll on her, trying out those new tricks and keeping up with everyone else, seeing and talking to her aunt gave her a new boost of energy. "How did it go with Spartan?" she asked and disappeared to the barn office to ditch her back bag so it wouldn't be on the way of the horses.

"Uhm…" Amy frowned and finally put the broom aside. She looked at the black gelding who was munching hay in his stall. "Not so well. I fear I might be a bit rusty."

"Even though you worked with tons of horses on the tour?" Georgie asked and checked what chores had already been done. If Amy had not been with horses throughout the tour, then what exactly had she been doing?

"Well, things there don't really work the way they work here", Amy explained.

"How does it work then?" Georgie asked and dug out Phoenix's brushes. She wasn't really aware what people did at the Equestrian Games, and no one here was as good - or as interested - with the horse stuff as Amy was.

"Well, for example, I rarely made close contact with the horses", Amy explained, thinking back to France, "I had an assistant to help me with everything - everything from brushing to saddling and feeding."

"An assistant?" Georgie echoed. That made little sense to her; one of the best parts with this all was doing that stuff by yourself. That way you bonded with the horses and shared special moments with them that no one else did.

"Yeah. He pretty much did all the dirty work for me, if you can say that", Amy explained. "I just watched from the side of the arena, gave feedback and instructed. That's what head trainers do when they work for Prince."

"That sounds boring", Georgie thought and went to greet Phoenix. The horse was busy eating, but it didn't stop Georgie from grooming him a little. "So, you didn't ride at all?"

"Not that much, no. Every now and then for leisure, but even then, my assistant tacked the horse for me", Amy said, knowing how odd it probably sounded to Georgie.

"But isn't that like part of the fun? Or do you just get bored with it when you've been with horses as long as you have?" Georgie wondered.

Amy laughed a little. Her niece was one of the first people to make her smile in months. Something about the way she was so innocently blunt was welcoming. There was no pretending or holding back. Amy could appreciate that.

"Well, not I, at least. I do miss it. I did miss Spartan. – Thanks for the pictures and reports by the way. – I didn't have what we have with any other horse. Don't know if I ever will", Amy confirmed and then changed the subject when she was starting to wonder how long it would take for her to return to that state with Spartan. "So, how was your lesson with Sandra?"

"It was… okay. Pretty crazy though, but I don't really wanna talk about it…" Georgie said, still feeling disappointed in herself. The tricks were getting more challenging, but she didn't have enough time to practice - especially because Sandra's horse, Chaplin, was so occupied with other students. If only she had her own trick-riding horse… As much as she would have loved to do tricks with Phoenix, he wasn't the right horse for it. Phoenix was a jumper and jumping would be what he would do for as long as he could. "I really want to know everything about the tour!" Georgie insisted, eager smile on her face. "It sounds so glamorous!"

"I don't know what to tell you", Amy shrugged. The topic was already getting somewhat old for her, even if she had just gotten back home. "And at the same time there's so much to tell."

"Well, like, did you do any good? Did you win?" Georgie's smile revealed her set of teeth. She figured she would have heard by it now if they had, but maybe she had just been out of the loop. "I tried to keep up with the tour with the new laptop Lou and Peter gave me, but… life got busy. Everyone was talking about you at school when you first left. Hudson's own Miracle Girl taking over the world. Then the talks just kind of… died. I guess people get bored easily."

Or we just didn't give them anything to talk about, Amy thought to herself.

"It's not like that. The actual games only start in September", Amy told her.

"So… what did you even do there then?" Georgie wasn't keeping up.

"Well… we had to prove that we are the nation's best in jumping, that we deserve to be there in the actual games. There's a huge selection process that has to be done before they send teams that have distinguished themselves through competitions", Amy explained patiently. "So we did smaller competitions for few months."

"Huh… Okay", Georgie shrugged. "So… did you do any good then?" she repeated her question. "In those competitions that you did?"

"Unfortunately, no. We didn't get in. They can only sent in 5 riders and 10 horses from each country, so it's pretty brutal", Amy commented and felt heavier again. "We started off good, but… then we lost seconds competition after competition."

"Too bad", Georgie thought. She took it so lightly that it almost made Amy wish she could take it too. But Ahmed's visit was still hovering over her head like a dark cloud. Bet he didn't take it so lightly…

"Yeah…" Amy agreed. She didn't want to bore Georgie with details about the change in the atmosphere in the last few months, if only to excuse the poor placing, because the less Amy brought light to it, the less she was hopefully going to think about that.

"So… do you think I did any good while you were gone?" Georgie asked, trying to hold back her enthusiasm. She was proud of the work load she had pulled with Jack and Caleb. "All of the horses are still alive, so I think I did pretty okay, right?"

Amy laughed again.

"Yeah, you did alright", Amy said and looked around. Even though Heartland felt "small potatoes" compared to France, they had their own little challenges here, as Amy knew. "I missed you, Georgie." Talking to her had made Amy feel better than she had felt in a while.

"I missed you too", Georgie said as she stepped out of the stall and came to hug her. "I heard about Ty… I'm sorry you broke up." Amy's arms loosened from around her.

It always took her off guard to hear someone acknowledging the break-up - it's like she had a feeling everyone knew, but it wasn't until they said it out loud that it finally became a reality to her, slowly but surely. Amy hoped that it was also one of the things that would maybe leave her alone the less she talked about it. But she also knew that this was just a start of it all: she would have only kid herself if she was trying to tell herself that what was out of sight, was out of minds too. She and Ty had been an item for so long that if the people weren't talking about her "success" in France anymore, then they did not need to worry: another topic to gossip about was just around the corner.

"Yeah… Sucks to be me", Amy shrugged, trying to make it seem like she wasn't having as hard time with it all as she was. She wanted some of that Georgie's way of handling things to herself. Ty was definitely difficult to just brush it off here at Heartland.

"Are you, like, still friends?" Georgie wondered.

"I don't know. I'm just making this up as I go. We haven't talked since he left France", Amy filled her in. "I don't really know if he wants to talk to me ever again."

"He came to pick up Harley few months ago. He sold him", Georgie said, still feeling bummed about it. She wasn't aware how big deal it was going to be for Amy, that's why she broke it to her so casually.

"Sold him…?" Amy repeated. She would have understood Ty taking Harley away from Heartland, but selling him felt pretty radical - especially after everything they had been through.

"Yeah. Said he was busy. I went to see him few times when Ty was keeping him at the rodeo grounds, but then someone bought him and… we haven't really seen with Ty since then. It's like he vanished along with Harley", Georgie shrugged. "Things have been really different here, with you gone and now him too."

Amy watched Georgie and saw again how she had matured a lot in just few months. In order to process what she had just heard from Georgie, Amy decided to give it a rest for now and instead focused on her niece instead.

"How you've been…?"

"Okay, I guess. Lou and Peter are going to this marriage therapy thing–"

"Couple's counselling", Amy offered.

"Yeah, that. And they're like talking all these things about re-entry pains and compromising", Georgie rolled her eyes. That's why the re-entry comment, Amy put two and two together. Seemed like Georgie had been caught in the middle of it. "They sound all kinds of looney and act all weird. They start everything with phrases like "Honey, I feel like…" or "Honey, we should…"" the girl imitated dramatically. "I've been trying to avoid them by being in the barn…"

"Well, they are tying to make it work", Amy explained. "Marriage's hard sometimes. Even if you love one another. Things just get in the way…" she might have not been married with Ty, but she knew the feeling.

"I guess… I don't know - I've just missed having the horse stuff with you", Georgie smirked a little, getting up on her feet again.

"Well, I'm back for good. And we can talk about horses until we are blue in the face", Amy said and squeezed Georgie's shoulder gently.

That was one thing she wasn't going to have a problem with. Everything else, however, was going to be a battlefield.


	32. Chapter 32

Later that day the whole family was gathered around the living room table to have a dinner together for the first time after Amy's return. Among those people was also Amy and Lou's father, Tim Fleming. As soon as the man walked in and took off his coat and cowboy hat, he hurried to embrace his youngest daughter who was just about to get the final bowl of salad to the table from the kitchen.

"Well it's about time I see you", Tim said and planted a wet kiss on Amy's temple. She looked slightly uncomfortable, as any child in their parents' embrace would, but at the same time she smiled, realizing it felt good to know that people had missed her this much. "Not that I would mind having two dinners in a row here at Heartland, but I was a bit disappointed that you were a no-show last night, honey."

"Sorry, I just needed to rest", Amy explained.

"You might not mind having two dinners in a row here, but the rest of us do…" Jack continued their ever-going banter and because of that earned a gentle slap on his arm from Lisa.

"Oh don't worry, Lis, I'm used to him being so charming, especially now that he's been so tense with all the ranch work Amy left behind", Tim assured and then gave his daughter a proper look. "You seem great, considering…"

"Considering…?" Amy tried to push him to continue the sentence, while still fearing what was to come. The father searched for his chair at the end of the table as everyone else were already behind their places.

"Well, the fact that you didn't make it to the games", Tim explained, receiving soar glares from everyone in the room - and a disappointed one from Amy. "What? We've all heard the gossip, but I'm the only actually saying something in front of her face. So don't go judging me."

Lisa took it to herself to try to gentle the blow Tim had just caused, knowing from experience that Amy was in no mood for insensitively structured sentences.

"Well, no matter if she made it to the team or not, we are still proud of her. It's not about the destination, it's about the journey", Lisa assured with a warm smile. Jack looked pleased with the way her newly wed wife handled the situation.

"Yeah", Lou gave her sister a loving stroke on the back before they all took their seats. Amy tried to brush the awkwardness off with a thankful nod.

"So, Amy, what's next for you?" Tim asked when the plates and bowls started to rotate from one person to another. "You back to Hillhurst or did the prince had some other competitions in mind?"

"I'm actually staying home for now", Amy explained and handed the peas to Georgie who was mostly listening to the conversation and not contributing much.

"I'm glad to hear that", Jack said, not hiding the fact that he had missed Amy while she had been on the road. Amy smiled to him, slowly getting a feeling like things were probably going to be okay even if they weren't going to be the same.

"I feel bad for leaving you guys in a lurch", Amy made a nod to Tim's earlier comment. "I thought things had been good, especially based on the way Georgie assured me through messages", she glanced at her niece.

"Oh they were, your father is just being his dramatic self", Jack assured, not wanting Amy to feel bad about leaving to pursue her dreams. Going to Europe had been once in a lifetime opportunity and anyone shouldn't have stood in Amy's way, especially with such a weak excuse as "piling ranch work". They had stable hands for that. Or whiny fathers who never stopped going on and on about their shoulder…

Of course there had been few hiccups along the way, but nothing they couldn't have handled. Georgie had really stepped up to the plate during these last four months.

"And as you can see, your grandfather is being his usual lovely self with the way he feels the need to comment everything I say", Tim muttered as he adjusted the napkin onto his lap. The bickering caused a few chuckles among the rest of the family and managed to relief some tension - for a while.

"When are you going back to Hillhurst then? I mean, you gotta strike while the iron is hot", Tim asked, not really seeing anything barbaric in the way he chewed the chicken and talked at the same time.

"I told you, I'm working at home. I'm not going back to Hillhurst", Amy replied.

"What, why?" Tim was dumbfounded. "Honey, I don't mean to interrupt your business plans", he started. But you will anyway, Amy thought to herself. "-but I gotta say, not working for Ahmed would be a stupid one."

"Things just weren't working out", Amy was hoping Tim would just leave it be. "Like you said, the tour wasn't a success." There was bitterness in Amy's voice as she felt the tension rise again. She had been okay dealing with the talk with only one person in the room, but now that Tim was going on and on about it, there were four other people watching her carefully, studying her like some soon-to-be classic case of someone having a meltdown, all while trying to stay politely quiet as she was having a discussion with her father.

"Yeah, but that happens. That's why they are called competitions", Tim reminded. "One day you win, one day you lose. But you never give up. Do you think I would be here if I hadn't gotten back on the saddle after falling several times? I'll answer for you; no."

"I know, Dad", Amy shot him a glance, "but I realized working as a headtrainer just might not be for me - at least not with Ahmed's team."

"Did something happen…?" Tim picked a clue from Amy's tone.

"Dad, just drop it, please", Lou requested. She could see just how frustrated Amy was becoming and she knew that her sister still had that meeting with Ahmed coming up in just few days. Amy was nervous as it was, and she didn't have to explain her own choices concerning the prince to anyone but herself.

"What? Why is everyone being so negative today? Aren't I allow to ask how my daughter is doing?" Tim asked and spread his hands, gesturing the astonishment this family was causing him. "And where is Ty, anyway? Not that I'd miss him personally, but you would think that since his fiancée is back in Canada, he would see a reason to attend to a family dinner along with the rest of us."

And that was the last straw. The thing that broke the camel's back.

Amy stood up from the table without finishing her plate and stormed off to her room, leaving everyone behind with an uncomfortable feeling. Tim looked after her, picking up that he had missed something everyone else was aware of.

"Would someone please explain to me what just happened?" Tim asked.

"Ty and Amy broke up", Georgie enlightened him. Tim's face dropped.

"Wh-what? When? When did this happen?" Tim asked.

"Months ago", Lou said, throwing her napkin on the table.

"Months ago?! And no one thought to fill me in on this?" Tim felt hurt.

Lou got up from the table and followed her sister to her bedroom. Jack, Lisa and Georgie kept on poking awkwardly their food on their plates, while Tim was trying to speculate what had happened with Ty and Amy for them to break off their engagement.

This had once again been one of the infamous Heartland family dinners.


	33. Chapter 33

Just as Amy predicted, there was a knock on the door. In fact it wasn't even that hard to predict, because just as she could hear Tim's confused questions right up to her room, she could hear Lou's steps as she strode with determination after her.

"Amy, can I come in?" she asked politely and Amy had to calm herself down so she could even make a sound. She was sitting on her bed, looking up and forcing her tears to roll back into her eyes. There were so many emotions pouring out that it was hard to know what was trying to overpower what. Something about Tim's words had broken the ice.

"Yeah…" she finally said and a few seconds later Lou was already in her room and looking concerned.

"Sorry about that… You know dad; as much as I love him, he can be a real jerk sometimes… Well, a lot of times."

"No, actually…" Amy said and turned toward Lou. The older sister saw just how upset she was and the crinkles between her brows grew deeper; Amy's behavior and words didn't match. "The more I think about it, the more I feel like he might be the only person with any guts."

"What do you mean?" Lou asked and sat on the other side of the bed.

"I keep going back and forth with wanting to say things that I think, but I fear rejection, I fear being left alone. And then when I actually say the things I want to say or do the things I want to do, because it's the only way to be the person that I want to be, people shoot me down for it. They want to keep me the certain way, because it makes their life easier. – With dad it's like… what you see is what you get. And that's pretty great because he will rather be hated for what he is than be something that he's not", Amy explained it. "At least I did what I wanted in Europe, at least I was being true to myself. Yet, they hated me for it. They hated me for my failures. But at least I dared and didn't go talking behind their backs like they did mine. I was being myself and I got hated for it. – It's hard not to please everyone and be who I am because I've been taught to just obey and be polite so I wouldn't upset people. But what about my feelings? Who am I living for if not for myself? Doesn't make me any more selfish than those people who I think I should just make other people's lives easier by being quiet."

"Yeah… Not many people are that brave, I guess", Lou admitted. "But this is good. Be angry, they were horrible to you. Keep that feeling in mind when you go to talk to Ahmed and you'll do just fine. He won't walk all over you", Lou encouraged her. Amy nodded a little.

"I just… I feel like going away and coming back made me realize who I've been - and who we all are. We live under the same roof, but we don't talk about things. What's out of sight, is out of mind, right? We are supposed to be family, we are supposed to love each other no matter what. But we are afraid to be who we are because we can't face conflict. I don't mean we just have to nod and accept everything, we can be critical too. But we shouldn't be so afraid to argue. We should let the steam out, deal with it and then carry on. I mean look at you and Peter - you haven't been honest with one another and you've drifted apart", Amy spoke.

Lou wanted to defend her behavior, but knew that admitting something was the first step to recovery. She and Peter were not fine and the more she tried to tell they were, the father away she was from the truth.

"I feel like I've bottled all these things inside me and now I just want to explode because I can't keep them in me anymore. I'm changing, but not being able to speak my mind is keeping me from growing. I need people to love me for who I am and not for who they think I am", Amy went on. Lou had to think about it. There was some truth in Amy's word - a lot actually. She had faced it in couple's counselling with Peter but had been afraid to admit it to Peter, fearing that he would use it against her in an argument they would have at some point. Every person who had not grown up in this family was always calling them out on their behavior, but most of the time they were too stubborn to listen. "I need to stop being so afraid. I need to stop thinking about what I will lose and focus on what I could gain."

"So… are you mad at me?" Lou had to ask.

"No", Amy shook her head. "But that's the point exactly: we all have our quirks and ways we've learned along the way. But it doesn't mean we should just stop loving each other whenever we make mistakes. I don't mean that we should understand or accept everything others do, but we should at least feel like we have a safe place to be flawed and screw up. And I screwed up, in so many ways. I just… didn't feel like I could talk about it to anyone because…" she sighed, "well, this is going to sound strange, but I knew everyone was going to be really gentle with me. And that's great, but maybe that's the problem. Everyone treats me like I'm some porcelain doll, so maybe I've never learned things as well as I could have. I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but sometimes it's good that we get thrown to the deep end; that way we learn about things the best, especially about ourselves. Like this thing with Ahmed - it was me, just me, out there and no one to back me up. It taught me a lot of things about myself. Maybe it was rough, but at least I learned the lesson. I saw that I could do it, on my own. And yes, Europe was amazing and those experiences will stay with me for the rest of my life, but that courage I found within… that's more valuable than anything else I've gained. And it's like it only clicked me now after what dad said because he put it all in words. It's like I needed him to be so blunt to finally understand what it was that was making me feel so disoriented here. I love you guys like crazy and I couldn't appreciate more of the things you've done for me, but I need to stand on my own feet now."

"Well, I'm kind of glad you said that", Lou spoke and tried to think of a way to make a subtle shift in the topic, "because even though I know you have a lot of battles to fight before you can actually say you are standing on your own feet, I think there's one that you should fight sooner rather than later. And that's with Ty."

Amy listened. She had been very brief about everything that had happened between her and Ty, partly because she felt like her relationship with him had become everyone else's property and that way it had taken all the power out of her. It was no longer hers, but everyone else's business how she behaved in her own relationship. Everyone wanted to hear all about it, but they were always waiting for their turn to talk. No one just wanted to listen and understand.

"I spoke with him when he visited here few days after the trip and… he was… really hurt about the way things went down in France", Lou explained. If Amy wanted frank, it would be what she would get. "How you just let him go and didn't even give him a reason."

"But I did", Amy assured. "I told him that I felt like we had drifted apart. I only realized it in France but I feel like it had started long before that. We were just making our own decisions, not really putting any thought to what the other one was thinking. We told each other and ourselves that we were doing it for us, but I don't know if it was the truth. It was like we were too scared to tell each other things because we knew how the other one would react. Him buying Charger, me taking up Ahmed's offer… We could have made compromises, together, but we didn't. – I've listened to you going on and on about the problems you face with Peter, and not to sound rude, but I don't want to end up like that. Not communicating, not knowing who I am anymore because I haven't been honest with the person I'm with - and with myself."

"So… do you still love him?" Lou wondered.

"I do. Of course. I will always love him. He'll always be part of my life and my heart. That will never change, even if I change."

"But you gave back the ring…?" the older sister was confused. "You just didn't want to marry him anymore?"

"It's complicated", Amy sighed.

"How?"

"Do you remember when we threw Ty that little party when he was going to vet school few years back?" Amy asked. Lou nodded. "When I went to the pond and we had that talk about how Ty had grown up and how I didn't know what I was waiting for. Well, I think I do now. I think I knew even back then, somewhere underneath, but I was afraid to admit it because I was afraid I'd lose a hold of Ty. By giving him hope, I was keeping him close until I would sort myself out. I knew I still had some growing up to do to match the growth that he had had. And this is me growing. I'm not afraid to be alone anymore, because I know I can deal with it. And Ty doesn't deserve to be kept on some kind of leash just because I haven't matched his level yet. He deserves that ranch, that marriage and that career, whether he has me by his side or not."


	34. Chapter 34

Amy walked out of her room after she had made more sense of her feelings with Lou. The older sister had been helpful by listening and challenging her to explain herself even further. Fortunately, Amy could see that she wasn't the only one going through a change: the results of Lou's counselling were already showing, she wasn't so definite about things anymore and she rethought words that would have slipped by her lips before. It wasn't easy for either of them to change so thoroughly and they both realized it would take time to overcome the biggest transition, but the great thing about this was that even though their paths were separate, they weren't going through the journey alone. Talking helped; it made things more concrete and easier to handle, just like Jack had advised Amy earlier.

The younger Fleming sister now realized she was taking a new role in her life, kind of like Lisa had told her she had taken over new roles in different places and phases of her own life. The one Amy was introducing to herself was a role of an independent woman who was trying her best to be more aware of her actions and more sensitive of her surroundings, a person who opened herself for opportunities instead of shutting her soul in the same old cocoon she had confined it into before. To be brave you had to be scared first. From there on out, it would get easier. Having no one to talk to in France had kept Amy locked inside circles of which she didn't know how to break free from.

Lou traced her sister's steps back to the living room, but while she felt nervous about Amy coming back to face her family again, there wasn't anything that would have given an impression Amy was feeling agitated. And indeed she wasn't. It was like she was in control of her own emotions for the first time in months.

"Dad…?" Amy spoke. The man sharpened his hearing.

"Yes, honey?" Tim replied and everyone stared at the two of them, like they would be watching a play unfolding in front of their very eyes. Amy tried not to let the attention bother her, but instead fully focused on her father like he was the only person in the room.

"I'm sorry for storming out like that", Amy said, not even bothering with any excuses, but simply apologizing for exiting like she had.

"I just hope you're okay", Tim worried.

"I am now", Amy assured.

"Good", he slapped his hands together and rubbed them impatiently. "Now can we get back to dining? I'm starving!" Tim laughed a little, already moving on. It helped Amy too; she saw that the situation could be quickly solved if only she did not let it drag it on forever. It was good to take a breather, think before you spoke, but Amy figured it was better to try and untangle the problem as soon as it was possible, because the longer time went on, the harder it was to get back to it. Time only created more monsters to fight.

After dinner, Amy decided to accompany her father for his ride back home. As she still had not gotten through to Spartan - it was in her long list of things she needed to work on - she decided to take Copper for a ride instead. The horse made her think Mallory and their meeting back in France. Amy made a mental note to call the girl one of these days and apologize for her behavior.

"So honey, I don't mean to intrude, but what happened with you and Ty? I trusted that boy to marry you, but seems like that might not be happening after all", Tim asked when they were on top of a small hill that overlooked Big River. "The last I heard was that he came to visit you."

"He did. That was when we broke up. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I was just going through some stuff", Amy told him. Tim nodded, wondering if everything was okay with his daughter.

"It was me who broke off the engagement", she then added before Tim could made any snide comments.

Ty and Tim had never really seen things eye to eye. Even though him and Amy were no longer together, she wasn't going to have anyone badmouth Ty while she was around. Like she had told Lou (and Ty) earlier, she still loved him despite feeling like it would be better for them to not be romantically involved.

"You? I thought you wanted to marry him?" Tim said and steered Champ toward the ranch that stood in the distance. Amy nodded a little.

"I thought so too", Amy said and then gave her father a cliff notes version of her trip to France and how it changed her perception of everything, especially of herself and her relationship with Ty.

"Yeah… I remember that feeling, that change", Tim said when they were getting closer to Big River. "First time away from home, touring and wanting to win so badly. And then feeling absolutely crushed when you didn't place. I may be getting ancient, but I remember that… It never really leaves you, not when it mattered so much."

"I know competitions are not for me", Amy wanted to say when she was getting a feeling Tim was trying to push the Ahmed issue again. "But I still feel something is waiting for me out there. I don't know what that is yet, but I'm going to find out."

"You're not in any hurry, honey, so take your time. My life has been hell at times, but I don't regret any of it because it's gotten to where I'm at. And I'm happy. Happy to have you girls and Shane in my life, happy to be a grandfather", a smile lingered on his lips before he continued. "I learned from those hardships a lot; sometimes it's better to take time for yourself so you can be better for others", Tim thought. "Others may think it's selfish, but we need to be a little selfish to survive. Who we are inside and what we do to survive is a very different thing."

"I think you might just be knocking the door of that famous grandfather wisdom", Amy couldn't help but crack a joke, even though there was definitely something to think about in Tim's words.

"Hah! And someone's getting their humor back", Tim noticed and stopped his horse at the gates of Big River. "I'm glad about that. Humor will take you long way. Trust me."

"Thanks, dad", Amy smiled. It was surprising just how supportive his father was of her exactly when she needed it. It had not always been the case.

Ever since reuniting with him after her mother's passing, Amy had had hard time trusting him completely, all due to his absence during her childhood. That had left a mark on her and weighted on the trust she put on people that were supposed to be there for her. But it had also taught her that even if it would take years for someone to pick themselves up, it could be worth it - if the both parties would be open for a new beginning. Amy didn't regret reconciling with her father even if it had been hard at times and he had a habit of causing her unnecessary trouble, because it had shaken her core so much that she was willing to believe in second chances.

And that had become the theme of her life.

"You take care of yourself, kiddo. I'll see you around", Tim said and rode closer to give her daughter a kiss on the cheek. Amy leaned closer and smiled.

"Yeah. See ya", she said and turned Copper around.

If her grandfather, who was the most stubborn person in the history of mankind, had granted Tim a second chance, then maybe she was bound to have one herself from everyone she had done wrong. It was what Amy was thinking when she headed back to Heartland, taking a little side trail to a familiar trailer located on top of a small hill.

It was time to see if Ty was in a forgiving mood.


	35. Chapter 35

Amy dismounted on top of the hill and loosely tied Copper to a broken fence that stood in front of the workshop where Ty kept his motorcycle. While Amy had been in France, the winter in Canada had been ruthless, and Amy noticed no one had cleaned up the yard from all the damages the heavy snow coat and the brutal ice had done. With a little bit of effort, the place could have been easily turned into a charming site from this run-down location. Spring cleaning was something Amy had always helped with ever since Ty had moved here few years ago. Now, Ty either had not had time or he couldn't have been bothered with it.

Things were getting more concrete the more Amy faced the past.

As she was walking toward the trailer, the warmth light seeping through the flowery curtains brought back memories Amy had shared with Ty. On a cold spring evening like this, she could have easily imagined them having hot cocoa together, while sitting on that old armchair Caleb had once dragged in from some yard sale. But while she had always been welcome here before, Amy figured this time she was not a wanted guest. But this couldn't wait - she needed to connect with Ty again.

Feeling her heart getting fainter with every step she took, Amy was focused on trying to arrange her sentences right, so focused that she didn't register anything around her. Not even the familiar truck that was parked right next to the living unit. It wasn't until she was about to leave that she realized that she should have seen the following coming had she looked around a bit more.

After her glove-covered hand had knocked on the door, she waited, wondering how it was going to be like to see Ty for the first time since he had gotten into that car in France. He had looked hurt and bitter, and that was the way Amy still imagined him to be. When the door finally opened, she wouldn't have been surprised if it had slammed shut on her face only seconds later.

"Amy…?" Cassandra, Ty's friend from work, stood in the doorway. Amy had to blink her eyes few times before she realized she wasn't looking at Ty, but this beautiful woman she had once thought to have been threat to their relationship.

"Cassandra…? What–what are you doing here?" Amy had not prepared herself for this and wasn't sure what she was expected to say.

"I'm visiting. What are you doing here? I didn't know you were back already", the other woman said and something about it made Amy feel like Cassandra had not planned to be here, as if she had not wanted to be caught red-handed. The way Cassandra chose to speak to her also made Amy irritated - why would Cassandra have any more reason to visit Ty than she did? She and Ty had been engaged while Cassandra and him were only colleagues… right?

"I came to see Ty. Is he around?" Amy tried not to give room for jealousy. Amy had not even thought about the possibility of Ty moving on from her so fast. She had figured this relationship was hard to get over and no rebound would ever take away the hurt that was still within them, two months later.

"Uh… Amy, I don't really know how to say this, but–" Cassandra said, acting awkwardly and glancing over at someone inside. That someone soon walked to the door.

"What's going on?"

It was Caleb. He was standing behind the brunette and was just as surprised to see Amy as she was to see him. Even if Amy wasn't sure what was going on, Caleb's presence made Amy feel a little bit better. Maybe there wasn't something going on - at least not right now. Who would even invite their best friend over if you were going to make out with some girl…

"Amy. You're back", Caleb noted.

"Yeah…" Amy was getting impatient. She had expected for her and Ty to have a private conversation together, but he had Caleb and Cassandra over and it was going to be anything but private. Maybe she should have called first and not drop like this, unannounced. "Is… Ty around?" she was trying to get to the point when she could feel her feet getting colder - literally.

"Cass, why don't you, uh…" Caleb gestured toward something and the girl took the hint. She then left the door and Caleb grabbed his coat before stepping out to have a talk with Amy. Her eyes wandered inside the trailer before the cowboy closed the door behind him.

"He's no longer living here", Caleb explained and got his coat on. "I am."

"What…?" Amy had not expected this either. But then what was Cassandra even doing here? "Where is he then?"

"Look, I know we are friends and all, Amy, but Ty is my best friend, he's like my brother. And brothers look after one another", Caleb's voice was stern. It was a big change to his usual happy-go-lucky style.

"Okay…? What does that have to–"

"You hurt him, really bad", Caleb continued. "And he's trying to move on. He moved out because he wanted to start fresh. And he couldn't have done that with you haunting him all over the place."

That explained why Ty had sold Harley.

"But I just–" Amy spoke.

"Listen", Caleb said without giving Amy any chance to explain herself. "I've been through this exact same thing, I know what it's like. You women go off and see the world and suddenly there are Ahmeds and Marcos and us guys back home don't seem that great compared to the possibilities that are waiting for you out there. And then you dump our asses and leave us with broken hearts, without any consideration. And just when we've gotten somewhat over you, you come back, you mess up with our heads and you screw us up - again. Ty's just getting back on his feet and I won't let you pull him back down. I'm sorry, but I just won't."

Amy stood there, feeling a lump in her throat. Coming from Caleb this was unexpected and therefore surprising turn of events.

Last year Ashley had returned to Heartland around the time of Amy's accident that had left her blind and it wasn't until later that Amy had heard that Caleb's former wife had apparently cheated some new guy with Caleb - without Caleb even knowing about it. Amy knew this hurt Caleb was feeling was coming from those fresh wounds, but she also knew whatever she and Ty had was not the same and therefore couldn't have been put into the same category.

"I'm not here to mess with his head. I'm not gonna ask him to get back together, if that's what you're worried about. I'm here to explain myself and apologize for acting like I did", Amy replied then.

Caleb looked at the blonde in front of him and weighted the options. He really wanted to keep Ty safe and his whereabouts unknown, but he also knew that he would have wanted Ashley to apologize for what she had done to him year earlier - but she never had. Maybe this was Ty's chance to have his apology.

"Okay, here's what we'll do", Caleb decided. "I'll call Ty, tell him you stopped by and ask him if he wants to meet with you. And then I'll call you. But this is going to be on his terms, not yours. You owe him that."

"Okay, fine, whatever. I just want to talk to him", Amy said. She didn't care how it happened, she just wanted it to happen. "I doubt he takes my calls after what you just told me."

"Alright", Caleb nodded. "I'll call you when I call you", he said and took steps back to the door. Amy nodded, feeling disappointed for not meeting Ty, but she still had hopes that they would find the right window for a reunion soon. "Oh, almost forgot. I got something for you. Hang on."

Amy waited outside while Caleb went back to the trailer and eventually came back with a plastic bag. She didn't know what it was supposed to hold inside, but when Caleb handed it to her, he glanced at Copper behind her.

"Don't know if you're able to carry that while you ride, but… Ty left these behind. I have no use for them. So do what you will with them, they are yours now", Caleb explicated.

Amy took the bag and peeked inside. It had pictures, random objects and some papers that she eventually realized were all connected to her.

Ty had done some spring cleaning after all.

"Have a good night now", Caleb was then back to his usual self and manners, but Amy was too stunned to reply anything.

The cowboy returned to Cassandra and left Amy wondering how weird it was that one relationship was small enough to fit into a plastic bag. She found pictures of them together, gifts she had given him on birthdays, Christmases and anniversaries. Something she had used time on, thinking how she wanted him to have something he could hold onto forever.

And then, a stack of papers about "the dream ranch".

Amy put rest of the stuff on the ground but held onto the real estate papers. After skimming through them, she noticed they were printed around the time of the Futurity Race and had some markings on them. But why had Ty held onto something like this, especially around that time? They had given up on that place months before the competition.

Maybe she wasn't the only one who had some explaining to do.


	36. Chapter 36

Ty concentrated. The final black stood on the baize-covered table, waiting to be potted by him. He gently adjusted the cue between his knuckles and leaned a little bit forward, laying his weight on the surface, eyes still fixed on the ball.

This was it, this was the perfect angle. And now… just the right amount of push and that 70 dollars would be his…

Just when he was about to strike, Ty's phone vibrated inside his back pocket, giving him a distraction that eventually caused him to miss the black ball.

"Ooh, Borden! That was so close!" one of his classmates, Matt, chaffed.

"Damn it…" Ty sighed and stood back up, trying not to mind Matt's mockery. He lowered the other end of his cue against the floor and leaned on it, then digging the cellphone from his pocket to see who had destroyed his chances of winning this round.

Caleb.

"Hey, man, you just lost me 70 dollars", Ty answered and gestured Matt that he would be right back. He set the cue on the side and walked from the group to a place where the music wouldn't drown his or Caleb's voice.

"What are you doing…?" Caleb's voice sounded distrustful.

"Playing snooker", Ty explained, then changing the subject. "What's up?"

"Nothing much, just wondering how you doing. Haven't seen you in a while", Caleb said and his tone was so fake that Ty had no trouble seeing through it. But out of politeness, he answered anyway.

"I'm fine. Hope everything's okay with you too?"

"Yeah, everything's great. Just that…" Caleb replied, "Amy…" there was heaviness in his voice when he said her name, "dropped by the trailer."

Ty suddenly felt huge knot turning in his stomach. He knew it was April and he was aware that was originally when Amy had promised to come back, but lately Ty had began to doubt whether she would be back at all, since the world apparently had so much to offer for her and Hudson did not. He looked around as if he was afraid his ex-fiancée would suddenly show up behind him now that she really was back.

"Oh…?" Ty said, wondering if he even wanted to know what she had wanted. But Caleb provided him with an answer.

"She wanted to talk to you. But don't worry, man, I didn't tell her where you were, but I offered to call you instead, so you'd have a chance to accept or decline", Caleb explained.

"Thanks, man. Appreciate that."

"No problem", Caleb said at the other end. "So… what am I gonna say to her?"

"Uh…" Ty was still caught off guard. He looked around, as if hoping that there would be some kind of sign that would tell him what to do. Cutting Amy out of his life had been a successful mission so far, but he would've lied if he had said he wasn't curious to know what Amy had to say, after everything that had happened in France. It was like she had had no more to say to him the last they had seen each other. Ty's head told him to run, to spare himself from more hurt, but his heart wanted something else than a band-aid to fix this bullet hole in his chest.

"I'll let you know. Is that okay?"

"Absolutely. Sleep on it. I know it's a big deal", Caleb supported his decision.

"Yeah it is…" Ty said and rubbed his forehead when the thought of it was already giving him a headache.

One thing he knew for sure: they were not gonna get back together.

Later, Ty was sitting in a bar counter and sipping his water. He was staring at the bottles against the mirror wall, then focusing on his own reflection between the bottlenecks. This time on his own had changed him almost as much as the previous years. The reflection he was looking at now and the one he had seen two months ago were different, even if he still pretty much looked the same. But it was something inside that had changed and it was now showing outside as well.

"Hey, Ty", a young redhead sat next to him. He glanced at her and smiled when he realized it was another one of his classmates.

"Hey, Lucy."

"Whatcha doin' here, sitting along and moping? Shouldn't you be kicking Matt's butt by the pool table? Everyone knows you're much better at snooker than he is, yet he's the one doing the smack talk and robbing everyone's money", Lucy commented and glanced over her shoulder toward the man who was kissing the money that was handed to him.

"I let him have one night", Ty smiled. "I'm back kicking his butt next week."

It made Lucy laugh.

"I'll drink to that", she said and toasted before she chugged down what was left of her drink. "Okay. Next one's on me. What are you having?"

"I already got mine", Ty said and raised his glass.

"Is that… water?" Lucy squinted her eyes.

"Yup. The only drink I'll be having", Ty nodded.

"Why? What's going on?" Lucy asked. "Are you part of some religious cult?"

"No. It's just a choice I made some time ago. Won't be drinking any alcohol from now on", Ty explained.

"You make rest of us look bad", Lucy joked and ordered herself another drink. "Or maybe I am just doing that myself…"

"Well, both of my parents have "the alcoholic gene" and I'm afraid that if I keep thinking drinking is the solution to my problems, I will be in a rehab in no time", Ty said, smirking even if the topic had not always been spoken about so lightly.

"So, you have a problem then?" Lucy guessed. Ty nodded. "Does the water help?"

"Not really, but I'm still sticking to it. At least I have a clear head", Ty assured before Lucy could offer him a drink instead. Lucy laughed a little and paid her own.

"Okay, let me hear it. Doctor is in", Lucy tapped the table.

"Are you making a Peanuts reference…?" Ty frowned, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"I'm allowed to. My name is Lucy", she replied.

"You know we are going to be vets and not psychologist, right?" Ty was amused and circled a finger on the edge of his glass.

"Potato, potato, doctor, doctor", Lucy shrugged. "Come on. Tell me."

"Okay", Ty chuckled and then sighed heavily, not sure what to tell exactly. "Where do I even begin…?"

"Start from the beginning?" Lucy suggested.

"You got eight years?" Ty asked.

"Okay, give me a summary then", Lucy changed her answer.

"Well… there's this girl", Ty started.

"There's always a girl", Lucy rolled her eyes. Ty wasn't sure if he should continue, but then Lucy helped with the situation by telling him to proceed. "Go on."

"And we were sort of– No, we were engaged", Ty said and kept his eyes on his glass, feeling vulnerable all of a sudden. Lucy on the other hand had her eyes on him.

"What? Borden, you've been keeping me in the dark. I didn't know you've been engaged!" Lucy was genuinely surprised. Ty mumbled something that sounded like "well, yeah", before Lucy continued. "What happened?"

"Well, I thought we were in love, I mean I was in love with her", Ty said. "And I really think she was too, but then… things changed. She traveled to France and I promised to come after her when I was able, but when I got there two months later, things had changed. She had changed too. She wasn't the same girl I used to know. I was trying to continue where we left of, I tried being myself, doing what we used to do, because… what else could I do? I wasn't really following who she was anymore. We were supposed to be us and not some new version of us, you know."

"World can change a girl", Lucy nodded. "Did you keep in contact when she was gone?"

Now Ty nodded instead. "Well, sorta."

"What does sorta mean?" Lucy didn't like the vagueness of that. A lot could lie in that word.

"We talked about superficial stuff, like how the weather was and what we had for lunch", Ty explained, "things like that."

"And you were engaged with this person?" Lucy checked. Ty nodded. "No wonder you broke up."

"There's more to it than that", Ty wanted to clarify. "It wasn't just that we lost the touch. It was like… I was afraid she was going to change her mind about us. That she would break off our engagement, decide I wasn't the one anymore if I kept bugging her. That I was holding her down…" his voice became sadder.

"Lemme guess: you did that for her?" Lucy offered. "You were so afraid of rejection that you broke it off yourself so you would get to choose when was the time for broken hearts?"

"No. Actually she did exactly what I feared; she broke off our engagement and ended our relationship. I have not heard from her since then, but now she wants to talk to me. Back in France, she just told me we were too different and that she didn't see why we should continue like that anymore. It was like she figured we had hit some sort of glass ceiling. It was one of those situations where you either give up, redefine the relationship or fake it. She gave up, I would have been willing to redefine it. And it's like… how long has she known about that? How long has she faked it? How long was she one foot out of the door? I hate that I have to go back to happy memories with us and replay them to look for clues. Like did she play me or did she not even know what she wanted in the first place, was she just with me until she'd figure it out? Or was this all just an impulse, in which case I don't know how she is willing to let eight years go just like that?" Ty sighed heavily. "And it's so frustrating, because I really thought I was happy with her, but now it's all colored by this break-up misery and suddenly I can't remember when was the last time I was truly happy. I mean is it happiness if you start to second guessing if the moment really was genuine after all?"

"Hmm, well… I'm glad I don't have a big reputation to live up to, since Lucy van Pelt only spouts useless advice", she thought after Ty's long monologue. "But I would think being happy is kind of personal thing. It really has nothing to do with anyone else. If you choose to be happy, you are happy." Lucy shrugged.

"If that's your worst advice, I don't even know what you consider to be your best", Ty scoffed and smiled.

"Must be this magic potion speaking", she grinned and nudged Ty gently against his shoulder.

Maybe it was hard to just decide to be happy, but Lucy had a point: he shouldn't give Amy so much power over him. His happiness was his happiness, and Amy could not take that away from him.


	37. Chapter 37

Spartan showed no signs of co-operation. The gelding's hooves drew a circle around the pen as he trotted on, and Amy wasn't sure if it was the way she followed him or her thoughts that made her head spin.

She had gotten up early that morning - not that she had slept for more than few hours on the previous night anyway -, got in her clothes, tied her blonde hair to a ponytail and then put on some mascara, all while trying to ignore the plastic bag Caleb had given her night before. The real estate papers Amy had discovered were on her writing table, as if she expected them to somehow tell her the full story behind the prints that Ty had kept at his trailer. The only thing she needed to think about right now wasn't the size of the farm or the potential the real estate agent saw in it, but why Ty had had those papers and why he had never brought them up in a conversation during these last four months.

Perhaps Ty had not been too sure about their future either and had expected the papers to tell him which way to go too.

But no matter how hard she tried to ignore the papers while she was working with Spartan, she couldn't. The horse picked up her mood and tried to signal it to Amy by not playing by the rules.

"C'mon, boy. Not again. Please, I need this", Amy tried to plead the horse to work with her, but the black beast kept throwing his head up and down like he was mocking her owner. It didn't do any good with Amy's current struggle with the low self-esteem.

"How's it going?" Jack wandered around from the barn and peeked in between the bars that surrounded the pen. Amy sighed and stopped circling, letting Spartan do whatever he wanted. Whatever Amy was trying to do wasn't going to happen, not today.

"I don't know what I'm going to do, Grandpa", she sighed, almost choking back tears. The old man looked at her sympathetically.

"Don't worry, Amy, it'll take time for you to settle back. You got all the time in the world with Spartan, he's not going anywhere", the old man pointed toward the horse. He knew the connection Spartan and Amy had always shared, and also that being apart for months from your horse was like being apart from your partner; these two needed to re-connect.

"But that's exactly the problem", Amy said and walked out of the pen, closing the gate behind her. "Ahmed is coming back to Canada tomorrow. I'm meaning to quit my job as a headtrainer and keep doing what I used to do, but seems like I've lost the touch; I can't even work with Spartan - and he knows me better than anyone, so if I can't even connect with him, how am I supposed to connect with any other horse? He should be able to trust me, help me out."

"Maybe that's exactly it; he knows you better than anyone. He can sense something's bothering you. Even I can tell that. And I'm guessing it has nothing to do with that prince or your plans", Jack said and took off his gloves. Amy looked down and fiddled her fingers, wondering if she should tell about the papers to Grandpa since he was already onto her. Eventually she figured that it was better to speak about it than let it bottle up, especially if it was what kept her from working with horses. She could ride them, but it had never been about riding horses with her - it was about the unity she felt with these beautiful creatures.

"I visited the trailer yesterday."

"Ty's trailer…?" Jack checked.

Amy nodded.

"And…?"

"Ty wasn't there. Caleb was. And he gave me this bag of things that Ty had left behind, things that he figured I might want. There were these real estate papers about that farm he found with you early last year. Our dream ranch", Amy's voice faltered.

"Oh?"

"I have a feeling he might have wanted to buy that ranch with the money we won with Charger. We sort of talked about not buying it before things got more complicated and we would fall apart…" Amy said.

"Then why did you go to France if not for that ranch?" Jack asked.

"Because of our future, because I wanted to contribute something for it too", Amy explained, but deep down knew she wasn't telling the whole truth. It wasn't just about the money, it had been about the opportunity too. "We could've used the money Ty got from the Futurity Race but it would have been his and not ours. Our dream together, the business, the clinic, it was what I was heading toward. As much I loved that ranch, I didn't think it was realistic to assume that it would still be available by the time I would get back. But we would have had money, so we could have found another one or build a new place. Now… it doesn't matter anymore", she shook her head.

"So, why do you seem so upset about it then, if you had already given up on that ranch?" Jack wondered, since it wasn't hard to see Amy's bottom lip was pouty and her eyes were full of frustration.

"Because he never said anything about it to me. He had those papers when I left France, I saw the dates on the corner of those prints, yet he never said anything!" Amy sighed.

"And why do you think that is?" Jack wanted to let Amy do her own thinking.

"I don't know, that's what bothers me. But I can't even ask him, because I have to wait for him to get back to me. I guess this is some sort of twisted karma…" Amy couldn't help but feel like her not talking to Ty back in France almost equaled to this secret Ty had kept from her.

"Why don't you just go back to the trailer then?" her grandfather asked.

"Because when I said he wasn't there I meant he had moved out", Amy explained further. "And Caleb won't tell me where he is living now."

"Well, he wanted to make a clean cut", Jack recalled, nodding to himself, "that would explain it."

"I know, but things between us aren't finished yet, we still need to talk about everything that has happened or neither of us is able to move on", she sighed and started to fear maybe that wouldn't happen and she would end up being a bitter basket case. But didn't Ty want to talk too? Amy figured he must've had a lot of things to say, things that he had been thinking about over these months, even before she had left to Europe.

"You have to be patient. Not just with Ty but Spartan too", Jack told her granddaughter and squeezed her shoulder gently. "Even if things won't start rolling right away after you end your work relationship with Ahmed - well, no one's gonna die. Maybe you got used to that hectic lifestyle at France, but things around here go with their own pace. If you really wanna get back to this, then you have to get back to state of mind too. It's like we've always said; horses are on their own schedule and if you work against it, it's not gonna end up well. You have to remind yourself that. Not just with horses, but with yourself too. If you force something, it won't happen. Let it come to you."

Amy nodded, feeling disappointed that her grandfather didn't have the answer she so eagerly yearned for, but at the same time a voice inside her kept telling her Jack was right: she needed to stop making some things happen when she couldn't control them fully anyway. She couldn't force Ty to talk to her and she couldn't just lure her gift back by making Spartan run around the pen.

"Time to get Spartan back inside, I guess", Amy turned to the horse who was now in the middle of the pen, digging the sand with his hoof out of boredom. "Maybe I'll take the rest of the day for myself. I'm no use for anyone like this…"

"Don't beat yourself up too harshly, it's only been few days since you came back", Jack said. "And you know, sometimes it's okay to take time for yourself too. If you can't be good for yourself, you can't be good for others either."

"I try to remember that. Thanks, Grandpa", she walked to give him a quick hug before she got back to the pen. "Okay, boy. You win. Let's go back inside."


	38. Chapter 38

Ty was packing his backpack after a long shift at the clinic and wondered if he could dislocate his jaw just by yawning. He had not slept much on the previous night because the thought of Amy still wouldn't leave him alone.

Since Caleb's phone call, Ty had been going back and forth, pondering why he should see his ex-fiancée again after getting his life in order without her. He knew he had only learned to hold his head up in order to keep himself from drowning in these deep, dark waters, which made him lean toward not seeing Amy. Recovery was always such a fragile thing. He didn't want to be pulled back under the water again, especially since there was no guarantees what would happen when he'd see Amy's face after two months of no contact with her. By consciously getting rid of everything that reminded him of her, Ty had distanced himself enough to move on - slowly but firmly -, yet he still didn't trust himself enough to behave as he wished around her. When he pictured coming face to face with Amy, Ty imagined himself restrained, but what if the truth was that he would just lose the balance and run right back to her?

It was like an addiction; you knew it wasn't good for you, but when you got a taste of it, all those good feelings flooded back, eventually leading you lower and lower, right to the rock bottom, where you ended up hating yourself for being so weak. So Ty had figured that the best thing seemed to be completely removing himself from these temptations, even if the mental cuts Amy had caused were still a bleeding reminder of why he wasn't supposed to go back to her. His head knew what needed to be done, but ever since the break up, Ty's heart was unable to feel a thing. It was like caring was just an invitation for more pain.

"Hello, you", Cassandra walked into the room to take over the next shift. She swung her bag on the table while Ty gave her a nod as a greeting. "You look rough. Long day?" she asked, braiding her hair back so it wouldn't get on the way.

"Something like that", Ty shrugged and zipped his backpack shut. "You want me to go through the latest info?"

"Yeah, sure", Cassandra said.

When they walked over to the small cages where the animals were kept while they stayed at the vet clinic, Scott arrived and stole their attention.

"Oh, good. You're both here", he said.

"Yeah, Cassandra just arrived. We are checking the charts so she knows what has happened since she was last here. – What's up?" Ty spoke and could tell from the grim look on the man's face that something was wrong.

"There's something I wanted to talk to you guys about", he said, holding some papers and a cell phone. "It's about the future of this clinic."

"What is it?" Cassandra said and turned to face the man.

"Well, I've been going over some numbers and unfortunately it doesn't look too good for us", Scott said, the crinkle between his eyebrows getting deeper. "So, I've looked into merging the clinic with this another clinic and I finally received an offer from them. Now, we're only in the early stages of this whole thing, but we might have to make some cuts around here", he explained, and Ty exchanged concerned looks with Cassandra.

"What does that mean exactly…?" Ty had to ask.

Scott was having difficult time getting the words out, but he also knew that there was no way around things that just had to be said sooner or later.

"It means that I might have to let one of you go", Scott then admitted. "I know it's not ideal and I hate to do this, but… when the new people arrive, we have to think about what's best for the clinic and how we are able to help the animals that need treatment. But I want both of you to know that I will try to my best to keep you employed, but I can't make any promises."

Unsettling feeling started to grow in all of their bellies, and before they could talk more about it, Scott's phone rang and he checked the caller ID.

"I have to take this, but we'll talk more about this later. Meanwhile, try not to worry too much. I only wanted to keep you two in the loop", Scott said and took the phone call elsewhere.

Cassandra sighed melodramatically.

"Well, goodbye for me then…"

"What are you talking about? You don't know that", Ty frowned.

"Come on, Ty, I'm not an idiot. You know he's gonna pick you", she replied. "You've known each other longer and you don't have that whole Jeremy thing following you like a shadow - can't say the same for myself. I guess I have to start looking into other places to work…"

"Don't jump into conclusions just yet. You heard Scott, he said he might be able to keep us both", Ty replied.

"Please. How likely is that", Cassandra answered with a pessimism. "We don't live in a fantasy world. But… better get this shift started if I want him to write me good recommendations", she tried to move on, even when both of their minds were full of uncertainty.

The truth was, Ty loved working with Scott and he had already talked about partnering up with the man after graduation. Ty felt bad for Cassandra, because based on that, the odds weren't exactly in her favor. She had owned up to her mistakes, but could Scott ever really trust Cassandra completely? There had been times when Scott's faith in him had faltered too, but they had always overcome those doubts and Scott had admitted that he had been wrong for not trusting him, giving Ty a chance to live up to his positive expectations.

In his heart Ty knew Scott couldn't say the same for Cassandra. When the trust was broken as badly as it had been with Scott and Cassandra, there was always that underlying fear of when it would be broken again. Yet, Scott wasn't afraid to trust his heart which was telling him to give the girl a chance.

And that was when Ty finally realized life wasn't about being certain about uncertainty, but having faith that no matter the situation, you could always overcome it. He couldn't live his life running from something that he wasn't sure was even worth fearing. The only way to be fearless - which was what he needed right now in the wake of this new chapter of his life - wasn't erasing the thing that made him fear, but facing it.

Which was why he was going to call Amy and set up a meeting so he could finally reach the shore and not fear being drowned again.


	39. Chapter 39

Ahmed's "few days" had been too vague for Amy to know when exactly that was, but as an expensive car arrived at Heartland that morning, Amy knew that the prince was back in Canada and he wanted to meet her. She walked outside to greet him, but instead only found a driver who said the car was there to pick her up and not bring the prince to Heartland. Amy then excused herself for 10 minutes so she could go back inside to freshen up before she'd go to meet Ahmed. Even if they were friends, Amy thought it was polite to look like she was there to talk about business and not just casually meet him like he was only an acquaintance to her.

As she arrived at Hillhurst, Amy saw Ahmed standing next to a pen where one of his staff members and Amy's former personal assistant, Lucas, was training a horse she couldn't recall being Ahmed's. What she noticed however, was how gracefully the horse moved.

Amy stepped out of the car and felt the knot in her stomach getting tighter. She had figured Ahmed would meet her at Heartland, so she'd somehow feel comfortable telling him that she would pursue other things from now on and wanted to end their contract. After Ahmed would leave, Amy would've been home where she would have had the space she needed for herself to feel the relief that would hopefully follow the decision.

But being here, surrounded by everything that screamed of France, the wealth and glory, she felt more vulnerable.

"Hello", Ahmed turned around with a big smile on his face. Amy had not expected him to look so delighted to see her, which made her even more insecure. How did he feel about her now and how would he feel about her after she'd come clean?

"Hey", Amy greeted him and they then gave each other kisses on both cheeks. She never did this here in Canada with any of her friends and wasn't about to start now, but somehow the atmosphere of "the sophisticated circles" back in France pushed through and Amy felt maybe it was appropriate to go with what she had come to know. "You know I could have just driven here on my own."

"I know, but I felt like it was more suitable to have someone to pick you up", Ahmed explained and took Amy with him to look at the horse Lucas was lunging. "What do you think of this one?"

"He's beautiful", Amy said sincerely as she studied the way the horse was built. "The way he moves is amazing."

"That is what I thought too", Ahmed said, "but I wanted to have your opinion."

Amy already felt like she was being backed to the same corner she had been in France. She didn't want Ahmed to listen to her opinion too much, because she wasn't ready to take that kind of responsibility for him, even if he made the final decision.

"Well, he's going to be yours, so you should do what feels best for you", Amy replied, trying to pass more responsibility back to Ahmed.

"That's the thing", Ahmed said, "that's what I wanted to talk to you about. The changes I have made since the tour."

"Oh…? What kind of changes?"

"I fired everyone back in France and I am looking into hiring a new team", Ahmed told her.

"What…? Why?" Amy was confused. She knew things had not worked out, but firing the whole team seemed a bit too radical for her taste.

"Because they were my father's team, they had no respect for me. They despised me, and I only realized it through you", Ahmed explained.

"I don't understand", Amy confessed and Ahmed asked her to join him for a little walk. Amy followed along with him.

"I am sure you saw it too, the way they talked behind my back. Especially what happened with Emperor", Ahmed spoke and Amy nodded, even though it felt horrible to admit that in front of the prince. But if he knew it too, then there were no secrets between them, and besides, Ahmed had always valued her honesty, so why would she start changing that now. "It was just a terrible accident, but they blamed it all on us. I believe it caused too much tension inside the team and I cannot have that when I am competing. So, I wanna build a team of my own, one I have chosen carefully for myself. Not just some remains of what used to be. They held too tight onto how my father did things and eventually turned on me, but I do not want to do the same. You have given me the inspiration to look at everything from a different angle, to cowboy up, and that is why I want to offer you a new position."

"Ahmed, I–" Amy wanted this to stop before it got any further. It was already too awkward. But Ahmed was too distracted to notice Amy's interruption.

"How would you feel about being the team captain? There would be a palpable raise to what you earn now, of course", Ahmed couldn't almost hold himself still because he was so excited.

"Ahmed", Amy replied to his enthusiasm by keeping a straight face, "I can't accept that position."

His smile dropped and he looked confused. "Why…?" Ahmed had not even laid out the terms and Amy was already shooting him down. "What is it that you want?" he figured there was something he wasn't offering and it was the problem.

"I want out", Amy confessed, feeling the cold sweat. "It's nothing personal, but I no longer want to work for you or with you."

"I do not understand", Ahmed was having hard time grasping the thought.

"I'm not a head-trainer material, certainly not cut out to be a team captain. By hiring me you would be making a big mistake. I can't give you what you desire", Amy replied. She didn't want Ahmed to fail because of his blind faith in her. She knew there was no way she could meet his standards and it would be foolish to think she ever could. "I'm honored that you thought of me and I am forever thankful for the opportunities you've given me, but I'm going to step out now."

"Is it something I did…?" Ahmed started to sound like a lost child.

"No, absolutely not. You've been great - anyone would be lucky to work with you. But this career path… It's not for me. Show jumping is not my calling", Amy explained.

"But that's what makes you so great. You are not like anyone else, you have a vision unlike any other", Ahmed still tried to reel her back, but Amy's mind was already made up.

"Like I said, I'm honored, but… this is where we say goodbye. I wish you nothing but the best", she suddenly gained new kind of confidence in herself. Maybe it was saying it out loud that made her so sure. Even if she wasn't entirely sure what would happen next, at least she knew what wouldn't happen.

"So I guess there is nothing I could do to change your mind", Ahmed thought.

"No", Amy assured. "I just hope that this won't come between our friendship. Because even if we won't be working together, I still hope we can part ways on friendly terms. You've been a good friend to me, Ahmed."

"And I can say the same for you", Ahmed said and extended his hand for Amy to shake. He felt disappointed but at the same time wanted to honor Amy's wish above his own. "Thank you." She accepted it and gave the hand a squeeze.

Amy smiled when she noticed there were tears welling up in his eyes. She couldn't believe this was the same man she had once called sexist and condescending. The prince had come a long way from what he used to be and would surely go far with his new way of doing things. Amy was honored that she had been able to be part of that journey, if only for a while. When they shook hands, Amy felt something she had not felt for a while.

This was the right thing to do.


	40. Chapter 40

"And then I gave him few numbers so he could get in touch with some of my contacts, in case they were interested about the team captain position", Amy narrated everything that had happened with Ahmed to Lou as they were sat in the kitchen together, along with Lou's daughter, Katie.

The older sister raised her eyebrows in amazement, but then smiled. Lou had to admit that she had not expected Ahmed to be so reasonable, but maybe she had gotten him wrong all along. After all, she had never known a prince before - maybe they were different than the blood sucking business men she had had to deal with at Manhattan years ago.

"That's great!" Lou gushed. "It's a win-win situation for everyone involved. – I know what I've said about you and business, but maybe you're slowly learning how things work", Lou said, pride in her voice, and handed Katie a slice of apple. The toddler took it in her hands and started to nibble it from the middle.

"Well, the trip to Europe taught me a thing or two, and it wasn't all in vain, even if…" Amy's voice faltered and a veil of awkwardness hovered over them like a lonely cloud. Lou's curious eyes went from Katie to her sister.

"Even if…?" Lou encouraged her to keep going.

"Things went south with Ty", Amy said, hoping that the more she talked about it, the stronger she would get. She had known there were things she could lose by stepping into that helicopter four months ago, but she had never thought her relationship with Ty would be one of them. Amy had always figured that no matter what would happen, they'd always stick together, one way or another. Ty was family after all. She did realize it wasn't Ty's fault that they had not been in contact since the break-up, but hers.

Rarely someone who got dumped longed after the one who broke their heart.

"You miss him…?" Lou asked, sensing something in Amy's voice.

"I do. I mean, back there, I don't know… like, in some ways I did, but I was just so busy I guess I didn't really have time to think about it. I had to focus on myself. Of course he was on my mind a lot, how could he not, but… there was no room for missing him. We had our separate lives and different schedules, there was not much we could have done. I just focused on seeing him in the middle of the trip and it got me through the hard days", Amy spoke and admitted to herself that on the good days she had wished he was there to share them with her. "But here… somehow things feel the same", she shrugged. "I still feel like he's studying at the trailer and I'm just here, at home, doing what I do. As if he would be coming for dinner, until I remember he won't", Amy explained. "What I mean is that maybe it hasn't hit me that perhaps this is what it's going to be like… Kinda same, yet everything has changed."

""Perhaps?"" Lou echoed. "You think you can still fix everything?"

"Well, not everything, obviously. I think things got messier the longer I waited and I don't think we can ever really go back to what was before, but… I guess I still hope there's a chance for us, even as friends", Amy was fiddling the finger where her ring used to be. "Because we were friends before we became a couple and I can't remember a time when we weren't friends. He's become such a big part of my life."

"Yeah, I think I know what you mean", Lou replied and poured Katie some milk. "When you were in France, things with me and Peter exploded, as you know. There was a time when I thought about d-i-v-o-r-c-e", she spelled it out so Katie wouldn't pick up the word.

"Really?" Amy was surprised. It wasn't that she was oblivious to the problems Lou and Peter had had for a while now, no one in this house with paper walls was, but she had always thought they would just figure things out, just like they were doing now.

"Yeah. But then I thought about my life without him and I recalled something Grandpa said to me when I was close to getting cold feet just before our wedding", Lou spoke. "He said "if I love him, I wouldn't lose anything, I would only gain something". And I do love him, so much, so I don't want to lose what I've gained. I think that gave me some perspective and will to fight for this marriage."

"And how are things now?" Amy asked and took a sip from the mug she was harboring between her hands.

"Better, much better. We realize there are things we want but can't have - at least not right now, but that doesn't mean they couldn't happen. We just have to work toward them. I guess we are just both very frustrated when things don't move along, because that's what we're used to in the business world. And even if this is our personal lives, it takes a certain kind of personality to practice business and so, in a way, that kind of thinking is already rooted in us", Lou explained. "In business world things move quickly and you gotta see some results to know everything is working out. But even if that's something that usually takes over our minds, we've also learned other things from business - and life: how to make a compromise and how to make time for something. And that's what we are doing with our marriage - compromising and scheduling", she continued. "It's almost ridiculous how come we've been able to do that at work, but not at home."

"Not to be Debbie Downer, but is that really what marriage is supposed to be like?" Amy asked. "I mean, yeah, I get that compromises and making time is important - crucial even - but where's the limit? Can't you be a little bit selfish?"

"Amy, I have two kids and a husband, I don't have the luxury to be selfish", Lou laughed a little. "Marriage and kids change you. You'll understand one day."

Amy drifted off and thought it through. Maybe that was the reason why she had felt so suffocated: she wasn't ready to be selfless just yet. There were things that she wanted to accomplish but couldn't since she had already made other plans years ago with Ty. He, on the other hand, had already locked his dreams down. Amy wasn't ready for that - which was what her trip to Europe had shown her.

She wanted to break free from this feeling that she owed someone something.

Amy was then startled by a text message as her cell vibrated in her pocket. She dug out the phone and Lou gave her a glance when she handed her daughter the glass and returned the milk back to the fridge.

"Let me guess; Ahmed begging you to come back?" she still wasn't ready to let go of the image she had had for months.

"No, it's…" Amy almost couldn't believe her eyes, "it's from Ty…"

"What…? Really?" Lou was just as surprised. She could remember the talk she had had with Ty in the barn office and had been convinced he would not contact Amy anymore.

But maybe it was good that he did - Ty and Amy had things to talk about and he deserved to know the answers to everything that had tortured his mind ever since his trip to France.

"Yeah…" Amy's mouth felt dry and she was trying to process this. No matter how many times she read the words and could hear his words in her head, it still didn't feel real.

"What does it say?" Lou was intrigued.

"Hey, got your message from Caleb. Let's meet at the spot tomorrow at 5 pm", Amy read and could feel her hands shaking. She was actually going to meet Ty again. Things were moving along.

"What's "the spot"?" Lou frowned.

"It's…" Amy was having hard time communicating because she was trying to think hard, but she knew exactly what their spot was, "on the ridge. Near Mustang Meadows. When Ty had his motorcycle accident, I was waiting for him there to show my support."

"Ooh, okay", Lou nodded. "So… are you going?"

"Yeah, of course. This could be my only chance and I don't wanna lose it", Amy said and quickly replied to him. "I'll be there".

There was something haunting in the thought that he was probably holding his phone right now somewhere, possibly rereading his own message and thinking about her. For months Amy had wondered if she ever crossed his mind. She herself had noticed she had formed a habit of taking her phone out every now and then, just to wonder if she should text something to him or if there were any messages from him.

But there had been none, not until now.


	41. Chapter 41

It wasn't the first time Ty was scared to get on his motorcycle and ride to the ridge, but the reason for his fear was different than the last time. Previously he had expected to see Amy on the top of the hill, waiting for him, and he had used that as a motivator to face his fear of riding his motorcycle after his accident - where as now he expected her to be there, again, but this time she was the reason why he was so hesitant of going in the first place.

Amy too was caught in this weird sensation of déjà-vu. Mounted on Mallory's horse, Copper, she was staring at the long road with anticipation bubbling up in her belly, hoping that she wouldn't get stood up like she had thought the last time.

But when Ty's Norton sent its loud purr along the road, Amy knew that he would be there, just like he had back then. And just like then, it put smile on Amy's face. She knew there was some bad blood between her and Ty, but it felt almost as if none of it mattered as much as it did two months ago. She now knew Ty was okay, he had made it through - not that Amy had had doubts about that, since Ty was a fighter, but it was different to know it for sure.

His bike was fast and it quickly reached the branch on the road and Amy used that as a cue to steer Copper closer to the country road that brought them to a little more sheltered area. It offered the needed privacy to talk about anything and everything they wanted.

It wasn't just the swiftness of the dismount, as her feet hit the ground with the full weight of her body, that made her weak in the knees, but Ty's appearance too. He looked the same in his leather jacket and worn-out jeans, and when he stopped the bike, all his movements were so familiar to her that it was as if they would have been her own.

A coy "hey" escaped from Amy's lips when Ty took off his helmet and looked at her for the first time in months, though squinting when the sun hit him from behind Amy. His green eyes studied her and he felt like the sound of her voice was some kind of echo from within.

"Hey", Ty nodded a little, got up from his bike and adjusted the helmet on the seat. He removed his gloves slowly and wondered what to say next. There were so many things he wanted to talk about, but he wasn't sure where to begin.

"It's good to see you", Amy broke the ice.

"Glad you could make it", Ty returned the gesture. Amy nodded and the silence started to create a gap between them again. His eyes searched for anything that could help him to come up with something to talk about, but eventually he said; "I don't really know what to say." It felt wrong to just jump into middle of a conversation with no warm up, but small talk would be so pretentious.

"Me neither", Amy confessed.

Both of them knew there was a reason why they were here and the promise of that lingered around like an elephant in the room, waiting for the opening words. "How you've been?" she was following the safe path, but wasn't prepared to face that it might not be that safe route after all.

"I've been good", Ty shrugged.

Good?

Amy had not expected Ty to be miserable or depressed, simple "okay" would have done, but "good"? Good indicated things were fine and there was nothing he was sad about. Were they so easy to get over?

"So you moved out from the trailer", Amy tried not to get too wound up about her thoughts, because maybe she was just over-analyzing this since it was still a sensitive topic for her. Perhaps he was putting on a brave face.

"Yeah. Figured it was time to get a better place", Ty shrugged and put his hands to his pockets to keep them from nervously fiddling everything they could get a hold on.

"Caleb gave me some of your stuff", Amy saw a chance for this talk and she took it, "there were some real estate papers."

Ty looked at Amy, already knowing where she was going with this. Still, he didn't stop her. The whole idea was to get everything out there so they could move on.

"Did you plan to make an offer after all? I thought we had not decided on that yet?" Amy asked. She tried to keep her voice calm, but a confused, answer-demanding tone pushed through.

"Not that it matters anymore–"

"It does", Amy stopped him.

"Not to me", Ty looked her in the eye and felt no fear. This was good. There was no longing on his part. When he looked at her, he didn't want to run back to her and forget every logical thought he had come with over these past few months.

"We said we were gonna be honest with each other", Amy reminded him.

"I was gonna ask you about it", Ty claimed.

"When? After the trip?" Amy asked. "Why wait so long?"

"No", he shook his head. "When we were going away to that… romantic get-away, I was planning to bring it up. Talk about where we stood, how things were going with you and then possibly decide if we'd make that offer. I could have bought that ranch and had it waiting for you when you came back. I thought it was better to talk about it in person, but like I said, it doesn't matter anymore. You proved me right."

"Proved you right - how?" Amy didn't understand. Ty sighed. How to put something so complicated in a nutshell?

"For years I've been fearing that what we planned wasn't even what you wanted, that we weren't what you wanted", Ty spoke. "I tried to have faith, but turns out, I was right."

"I thought it was what I wanted. It wasn't until I traveled to France that I realized maybe I had not even considered other options", Amy told him. "It wasn't something I just decided, I didn't decide to feel the way I did. It just happened. But I felt like I couldn't just ignore those feelings."

"You could have kept me in the loop", Ty suggested. "Not have me blind-sided like that. I felt like an idiot. And I had to come home, humiliated, and explain to your family what had happened. Do you have any idea what you put me through?"

Amy bit the inside of her mouth, holding back tears. Just some minutes ago she had been convinced they could talk about this like adults, but clearly that wasn't the case. There was too much hurt, even if the dust had just began to settle. But right now, Ty's words felt like a big desert storm, ready to stir all the dust up again.

"I'm sorry, okay, I am", Amy cried. "That's what I wanted to tell you, that's why I needed to see you. I am, sincerely so sorry about everything. I know I messed things up and I know I hurt you. I know I didn't handle everything as well as I could have, but I can't change that now. All I can say is that I'm sorry, but it's still not gonna be enough, I know that. You don't have to forgive me, I don't expect that, but you have to know that I didn't mean to hurt you. I thought I was keeping you safe by letting you go. I was so scared of everything. I thought it was the people, new places and unfamiliar challenges that I was afraid of, but it wasn't. I was afraid of myself. Afraid to come face to face with myself, because I knew there was a chance that I wasn't going to like what I saw, and there would be no coming back", she continued. "For years I had just stuck to what I knew, not even giving a second thought about my place in life. It was supposed to be at home, with the people I love. But in France I knew that it was going to get dirty and people would get hurt, so I needed you out of the way, because I never meant to hurt you but unfortunately it was exactly what I did."

"You should have let me in, I would've been there for you", Ty said. "When I said that I was going to stand by your side, I meant it. What did you think the ring was for?" he wasn't sure what part of engaged-to-be-married Amy didn't understand. Maybe marriage was an alien concept to her.

"I just needed time, Ty, I still do. I feel like there is so much that you've done with your life and I haven't really even began living mine. You know where you are in your life, I don't. I thought I did, but I don't. I have no idea what I'm supposed to do, but I know I can't go back. I didn't want to drag you down, keep you waiting", Amy explained. "I shouldn't have accepted that proposal, but I only realize it now when the damage has already been done. And for that I'm so sorry."

Usually things ended with an apology, but Ty knew this was far from over.


	42. Chapter 42

"Ty…?" Amy tried when there was no response from his side. Ty was staring somewhere and trying to think what to say. He wasn't about to forgive Amy, not now, because it felt like it would only make it harder for her to see the consequences of her actions.

"About eight years ago I met this girl who was unlike anyone I've ever met", Ty started talking and Amy wasn't sure if he had even heard what she had said, because it didn't follow the pattern she had left in the air. "I was a boy who couldn't take anything for granted and I had somewhat already accepted that role. Until your mother took a chance on me", he said, his eyes somewhere on the horizon, coming up with a response that he hoped would make it clear for Amy what he was thinking and how he was feeling. Maybe she had never understood the depth of the journey he had lived, no matter how close they had been.

"And I thought, this woman doesn't know me, but she knows my record. What in the world could she ever want from me? Is this some sort of… experiment? Would I only get used to make someone else feel better about themselves? But I had nothing to lose, so I took that chance, and I'm glad I did. – I never met your mother, unfortunately, but from what I've learned she was an incredible woman. Instead, I met you and your family, and I learned what family actually meant. It wasn't a family like mine, where people came home drunk and disoriented, or family where people hit you if you ever dared to stand up for yourself or for others. Your family was broken, dysfunctional even, but you still loved each other, no matter what. I've only been here for eight years, but I've witnessed the changes everyone went through and you all did it together. So in that way I've also learned what it's like to have a family, what it means when you call someone a family. It isn't necessarily through blood or marriage, it's about how you treat that person. That's what makes you family", Ty spoke and Amy nodded little. She thought this felt too good to be true, and it was. It wasn't a speech she wanted to hear, but something Ty thought she should hear anyway.

"And I really became part of your family and it hasn't always been all about the perks. I thought, well, this is family, I can forgive them for hurting me occasionally, because how am I ever gonna get something like this again - this is where I belong. So, I accepted things, because no one's perfect, I know I'm not", Ty laid a hand on his chest. "But looking back, I realize there were times when I shouldn't have accepted hurtful actions, no matter how good I thought I had it. And pretty soon after I met you, I fell in love with you, I thought maybe you'd show me how to love as much as you guys love each other. Things were rough for us, but I always thought, well, whether she's my girlfriend or not, she's my family. I'll always have her, even if it would kill me to see her with someone else. So I learned family did things for each other, because family is a supportive unit. And that's why I did things for you - in fact, I built my life around you, because somehow I thought that was what love was: devotion and sacrifices. And maybe that says more about me and my foolishness than it says about you, but for eight years, I calculated everything so I could have a life with you - whether we'd be together as a couple or as… family. As time went on it began to seem like we would be together as a husband and wife. But when I was with you on the side of that road in France and you told me about your feelings, I was… shocked. I didn't know what I was feeling, I just knew I felt betrayed. I get that you're on some kind of mission to find yourself, and that's great, I'm not against it, in fact I support that, but… I may be stupid and may come from a messed up family, but there's still something I know in my heart: family doesn't do what you did to me. You said, you didn't feel like fighting because it wouldn't make any difference. Maybe not as a couple, but what about as family? You gave me back the ring and saw me on my way, but that was it. I didn't hear from you for months, it's like… you no longer cared. I couldn't believe that this was the same person who helped neglected horses and at the same time threw my heart away without any remorse. So… what was I to you, really? Because I don't feel like I was family. I listened you go on and on about your happiness, and even now, you're telling me that you're looking out for me because you're going through something. It sounds noble, but… I don't feel any different. I'm trying to understand, but… is that all I'm left here with? The thing I've always been doing for you, even though that's exactly why you threw me away? I'm not saying that you haven't supported me along the way - because you have - but lately… there has been no support."

"I thought you wanted to be alone, think this through, it's what you always do when things pile up", was all Amy could come up with after Ty's long monologue. She felt like standing up for herself, but she didn't know where to begin.

"But did you ask me?" Ty checked.

Amy knew she couldn't say she did, but she still wanted to believe she had kept him safe from her and Ty somehow refused to see it, so she tried: "But even when I came to your trailer, Caleb had to be the one telling you that I wanted to see you."

"You could've called?" Ty suggested.

"But would you have picked up?" Amy doubted.

"Maybe not, but you could have tried. Instead, it was all about you and your feelings. And yes, we have to be selfish to some degree, look after ourselves, but that doesn't mean we can do whatever we want to other people and excuse it with that", Ty lectured. "Did you ever think this from my point of view?"

"But I was trying, I told you, I was trying to protec–"

"I don't need protecting, Amy!" Ty interrupted her. "I'm a big boy, I've survived worse than a heartbreak even if it hurts like hell. I don't need your protection. You always tell me you want me to be honest with you, but are you honest with yourself? You pushed me away without me having any say in it. Maybe you felt uncomfortable, that's what I got from you, but the minute you broke up with me I was not just no longer your fiancé, but it seems I stopped being family as well. It's not the fact that you dumped me after I had gone all out for you, it was that you treated me like I was a stranger. And that's why I'm angry at you and I don't accept your apology, no matter how sincere it is. Because I feel like it's not to make me feel better, it's to make you feel better. And I now know that I definitely no longer want to have that ranch with a person like you and I no longer want to have anything to do with you."

"What are you saying…?" Amy's voice was getting weaker as her eyes welled up.

"That this is it, this is me walking away from you, because you've chosen to treat me like I'm a stranger and therefore I no longer consider you my family or my friend", Ty made it clear. Amy took in a sharp breath, trying to keep herself standing when her head started spinning.

"But… we could work this out…" Amy tried.

"Why? What do you need me for? I don't want to be some footnote in your happiness, Amy. I wanted to be your husband, your other half. But this relationship has run dry, it has nothing to offer to me anymore. So I'm cutting you off."

"Ty…" Amy shook her head desperately, trying to come closer, but Ty physically removed her from himself.

"Amy… no", he said, determination in his voice. Amy's lost eyes were looking for shelter, but Ty refused to give that to her. "If you really love me you have to let me let you go."

Amy couldn't even say anything anymore because of the lump in her throat, so she had to nod, even though it broke her heart. But how could she refuse what Ty wanted if she really did love him?

Ty took steps back, closer to his motorcycle and put on his gloves and helmet. Amy leaned on Copper, gripping his saddle like it was the only life boat to keep her floating.

"Goodbye, Amy", Ty said before he started the engine and drove away.


	43. Chapter 43

Georgie entered the ranch house and could hear Jack and Lisa talking in the kitchen while they were getting dinner ready. She was surprised to see the old man tickling Lisa's sides as the woman was holding a bag of bread over her own head. The scene seemed confusing to an outsider's eye, but Jack and Lisa had just simply found a way to playfully flirt between the domestic tasks, making them more interesting to do.

"I'm telling you - I'm not ticklish and you know it", Lisa insisted, but Jack didn't seem to believe her, seeing as his fingers kept traveling up and down on her body. "But you, on the other hand, are…" she attacked back and had the man back away.

"Hey, now!" he scolded in a friendly manner.

"Ha, gotcha!" Lisa cheered.

Georgie cleared her throat as she felt like she was interrupting something intimate, even if nothing was harmful to a young eye.

Jack and Lisa stopped what they were doing and both looked at their great-granddaughter who was still lingering at the doorway, waiting to say what she had to say.

"I was just wondering if you guys have seen Amy", Georgie asked. Jack tried to recall the last time he had seen her, but wasn't sure how many hours ago it had been since whenever Lisa came to the ranch, he lost the track of time.

"I guess we're so used to thinking she's not around that I don't really look after her that much these days", Jack replied.

Ever since Amy had left for Europe, Jack had had to come in to terms with the fact that Amy was no longer a child and she didn't need a babysitter, no matter how much Jack wanted to protect her from the world. It had turned out she was good at handling things on her own - or at least that was how it seemed since she had returned home in one piece. It had been hard for Jack to cut those ties, but lucky for him, he still had Georgie and Katie to spoil with love and care.

"Copper's not in his stall and I was hoping I could go on a ride with Stephen", Georgie explained. It was almost like Georgie mentioning a boy was a cue for Lou to enter into the conversation. The older Fleming sister had been in the living room with Katie and had been eavesdropping since Georgie had entered the house. Jack and Lisa's flirting had not spiked her interest since they had been acting like newlyweds for months now, but Georgie getting closer with to this Stephen boy was something Lou as a mom had to be on top of.

"Stephen?" Lou echoed.

"Yeah, it's no big deal. I would use Checkers, but Stephen sorta fell in love with Copper so I promised he could ride him", Georgie explained.

"Oh, well… Amy went to see Ty", Lou knew now that everyone's eyes were now fixed on her.

"Ty…? But I thought…" Lisa didn't even have to finish the sentence because everyone in the room knew what the situation with Amy and Ty was.

"Yeah, well, she was hoping to patch some things up with him", Lou explained and Georgie's eyes grew wider out of excitement.

"Really?" the young girl asked. She had missed Ty since they had not seen each other for months now, but this new information had her hoping she'd be reunited with him again.

"Yeah", Lou nodded. "Wait - so Amy's not back yet?" Lou asked and checked her watch. "It's been hours."

"Maybe that's a good sign?" Jack said. "Maybe they've really gotten to the root of the problem and don't want to stop while they're at it?"

"Hope so", Lou said, but couldn't shake this feeling she had. Maybe it was curiosity too, but something felt odd to her and she couldn't put a finger on it. It was more like a hunch and not based on any evidence. "Grampa, can you look after Katie for me?"

"Sure. What is it?" he was wondering what was starting to brew in Lou's head.

"Georgie, let's saddle up", she announced and wrapped her arm around her daughter's shoulders.

"What, why?" Georgie asked as she walked to the mud room.

"I just wanna make sure everything is alright", Lou said.

"Sure you're not just snooping…?" Jack had to asked before Lou could pull on her boots and put on her jacket. Lou looked over her shoulder and frowned.

"What? No?" Lou was almost offended at her grandfather suggesting that. Lisa figured it was better to keep her lips sealed since she had been known to stir Lou's anger through the roof with her comments before. "I'm not gonna go between them, I promise. It's just… it's been hours. We are about to eat dinner soon. She should be here."

"And if Ty's there, we could ask him over for dinner too", Georgie suggested. "That way they don't have to end things too quickly."

"Great thinking", Lou smiled and had Georgie grinning too.

"Just… be careful and don't interfere, that's all I'm asking", Jack decided it was useless to try and stop Lou, but he just couldn't let Lou go without giving her some advice before she left.

"Okay. And don't forget Katie", Lou reminded them when she was already half way out of the door. Lisa put the bread down on the counter and raised her hands in the air.

"I'm on it", she declared to Jack. "You look after the stew."

Lou and Georgie mounted Phoenix and Checkers and headed to the ridge. It was almost as if fate would have it that Lou had been there to ask Amy about the reunion and their meeting spot, because now she knew exactly where to look for them. There was a good view up to the hill from the path they rode, so Lou could see clearly that neither Ty nor Amy was on the ridge as they arrived to the general area with Georgie.

"Maybe we missed them?" Georgie suggested when Lou looked disappointed about not seeing them where she had thought them to be. Lou shook her head, knowing her sister was a creature of habit.

"No. Amy always uses this route", Lou insisted. "Come on, let's go and take a look around." With a click of tongues, they were both on the move again.

As they reached the ridge, Lou and Georgie saw Copper standing on the side of the country road and someone sitting right beside him. Lou immediately recognized it to be Amy.

"That's her!" Lou whooped.

"She's alone", Georgie squinted her eyes and felt disappointed when she couldn't see Ty.

"Maybe she got stood up?" Lou said and gave Checkers a cue to move. Georgie followed behind with Phoenix.

The closer they came, the better Lou could tell Amy was hunched over and crying. Her body was trembling and her head was hanging between her shoulders. She was ripping the grass in frustration, tossing it away after she was done with it, and could only hear Lou and Georgie when they were just few feet away. Amy immediately tried to quiet her sobs.

"Amy…? Are you okay?" Lou asked as she dismounted her horse. Amy quickly wiped her tears away and tried to pick herself up, but did lousy job of it, because Georgie soon called her on it.

"What happened?"

It took a while for Amy to get her throat cleared.

"I don't know what I'm doing… with anything…" Amy said and burst into another crying fit. Lou rushed to her sister and embraced her, watching over her shoulder at Georgie who looked confused. Lou had no idea what exactly was going on, but she was glad that she had sought Amy out. Who knows how long she would have been sitting here if they had not arrived when they did.


	44. Chapter 44

_People complaining I'm too slow updating this; life gets in the way sometimes._ _ **I write fanfictions for fun, it's not my profession.**_ _The story's not ending just yet/I'm not bored with it, it just takes time to come up with the chapter(s) because that's the way creative writing works - you can't force it. And the fact that I'm not English provides another level of difficulty for me. These new chapters might be "a bit slow" to your liking, but they will make sense in the end and serve a purpose to the bigger picture. There's a reason for this sort of pacing; I don't want to rush into the ending without setting things up first._

 _That being said - hope you enjoy this chapter! More to come in the upcoming weeks._

* * *

Georgie was brushing Phoenix in his stall even though the horse's white coat was as clean as it would get. Something was troubling Georgie and she didn't know what else to do other than spend time with the only friend that wouldn't pester her with questions she didn't have answers to. She had texted Stephen and told him that the ride wasn't going to happen tonight. All she knew was that she had this tightness in her chest that wouldn't leave her alone. It had been there for months and Georgie had no idea how to shake it off. The only time she felt free from it was when she was on a horse and had to focus on something else than her personal problems.

The house had gone into "a shut down mode" after Georgie and Lou had brought Amy home from the ridge. They had helped her to bed and then eaten an awkward dinner in silence with Jack and Lisa, all the while wondering if they should even try to speculate as to what had happened. They were all hoping Amy would come out and tell them what exactly had taken place in that field.

"Georgie...?" Lou's voice echoed in the barn when the mother of two walked to see where her other daughter was hiding. They had hardly spoken since finding Amy and it bothered Lou. Usually Georgie was so vocal about everything, but now she had been lost in thought for hours. Lou was worried about Amy, of course, but not only was she a sister, but a mother as well, and her main focus was on her children, especially since Peter was back at work at Vancouver and she was left to handle things back at home on her own.

"In here", Georgie replied and started to go through the knots in Phoenix's mane. Lou reached the stall and stared at Georgie even if she wouldn't even give her a glance to connect with.

"Everything okay?" Lou asked. Georgie let her wait for her response.

"I don't know. Everything's just so weird", she finally said.

"What do you mean?"

"Well..." Georgie sighed and stopped what she was doing, "Lisa's always around, which I like because she's cool, but it just seems like she and Jack are the only ones who are happy these days."

"What do you mean?" Lou leaned on the stall door and let her daughter do the talking. She wanted to give her an opportunity to be heard because it was important to remember that she was going through all sorts of changes too along with rest of the family.

"Ty and Amy are no longer together, Amy has been miserable ever since she has come back from Europe and you and Peter... you guys are probably about to split up too."

There was hurt in Georgie's voice that stunned Lou.

"What? Oh, honey, no, we are not about to split up - if anything, the opposite. We are working things out, in fact things are getting better for us, for all of us", Lou said as she opened the stall door and stepped inside the space where Georgie and Phoenix were. "Actually... it's something I wanted to talk to you about."

"What?" Georgie turned to face her.

"Peter and I have been looking for a house to stay, a home of our own. We've been trying to pinpoint why we keep fighting and one of the biggest problems we have is that we don't have a place for ourselves", Lou explained, trying not to roll anything too heavy on Georgie.

"We're moving...?" Georgie asked, looking a bit horrified.

"Yes, that's the plan", Lou nodded, not prepared to Georgie's reaction.

"No! I just told you I hate that everything is changing! I've learned to like it here, I now have friends, I have my horses, my hobbies, I won't move!" Georgie argued.

"Honey, let me finish before you go any further", Lou said, trying to calm the girl down. "We are moving, but we're staying close. We've actually been talking about building a house near the Dude Ranch. We planned to do that before, before you arrived to our lives, but it didn't work out, so we changed the plan a little bit and hopefully we are now able to stay close to Heartland, but also have some space for ourselves. So you can still keep your friends, hobbies and horses, and I can run the business while Peter's working at Vancouver. And hopefully, that will solve most of our problems. I know things are never gonna be perfect and hopefully Peter will get a position closer to Calgary, but we are working on things as we go. You and Katie are always our main concerns. We want you to have a good childhood and a stable home, and we hope this will provide you just that", she caressed Georgie's brown hair. Lou's words got Georgie thinking.

"So we're moving out...?" Georgie checked and Lou nodded. "But... what about Jack and Amy?"

"Well, I suppose they stay here, just like they always have", Lou said. "This is their home and that's not gonna change. And I think Phoenix and Checkers can stay here, so you can come visit anytime you want. I don't think Jack and Amy are gonna be opposed to that."

Georgie nodded and felt glad that she wasn't going to lose Heartland completely, even if it meant that she would no longer live there.

"Do I get a room of my own...?"

"Of course. And the best part is you get to choose what kind of room that is. The wallpaper, the furniture, everything", Lou gave her an encouraging smile. It made Georgie excited, but there was still something she had to understand.

"What will happen with Amy? She's so sad, I've never seen her like that", she said worringly. Lou's smile quickly faded out because she had to think about it since there were no easy answers to explain heartbreaks to a teenager who had never been through one herself. "Why can't they just get back together, they were so happy."

"Well, love and relationships are complicated", Lou replied. "Sometimes it doesn't happen when we want it to happen and even if you would love each other, other things just get in the way."

"But can't they go to therapy like you guys have, find solutions for their problem?" Georgie said as she tried to reason it out in her mind.

"Well, that's up to them. No one can force them to do anything, and I for one have had to learn that. We can hope for the best, but we too have to learn to let go when it's clearly not our place to be the glue that holds things together", Lou explained calmly. "They are supposed to be together because they want to be and feel like it's the only way to go, not because of the pressures that come from outside their relationships."

"Just sucks..." Georgie said and turned to face Phoenix again. "Ty's always been around and it's weird that he isn't. And Amy doesn't work with horses anymore because she's so upset all the time."

"Yeah, I know..." Lou agreed and glanced at Phoenix. "But it's important that we are there for Amy and help her through this difficult time. It might take a little while, but I'm sure she'll get through it. You think you can do that for her?"

"Yeah, of course", Georgie nodded.

"Good. Then she has one less thing to worry about", Lou said, hoping that it was enough to carry Amy through this storm.


	45. Chapter 45

Jack decided he couldn't go to bed without checking on Amy first. The younger Fleming sister had stayed in her room ever since she had arrived with Lou and Georgie, and the room had stayed silent the whole time. It was unusual for Amy, as was always on the move, usually going back and forth between her room and the barn.

The old man knocked gently on the door, his ear almost pressed against the wood as he waited for a response. When there was none after few minutes, Jack figured Amy must have dozed off already, but just to make sure he would get some sleep tonight instead of worrying the whole time, Jack carefully cracked the door open and peered in. The night light was on and Amy was on her side, her back facing the door. If it had not been for the quiet sobs, Jack would have thought she was asleep.

Jack took the liberty to enter the room, hoping that it wouldn't upset Amy as he wanted to offer her some comfort in exchange for invading her privacy.

"Amy…? I was just checking up on you", Jack let her know he was in the room, even though he had a feeling she was aware of it already.

"I'm okay", she replied, but her stuffed nose and shaky voice indicated there was contradiction in what she said and how she sounded.

"You don't have to act all brave for me, I know you're going through a hard time. I only wanted to let you know that whatever it is… I hope you know you can talk to me."

"I just don't know what I'm doing. I get up and then I am back down again. It feels like no matter how hard I try to convince myself I am doing the right thing, it all turns out to be a dead-end", Amy poured her heart out. "No one wants me, no one needs me. I feel like I'm just waste of space."

"That's not true", Jack said as he walked closer to the bed sitting down on the side of it. Amy turned on her back and the grandfather could now see her bloodshot eyes, runny nose and swollen face, as she had been crying for hours. "We all want you here."

"It doesn't feel like it. You were all fine without me, even Spartan thinks I shouldn't have come back, he's acting all strange and…" Amy bit her upper lip, feeling like she was choking on the words, "I'm just a terrible person."

"What makes you say that?" Jack asked.

"Ty said… I was not considerate with his feelings or any of your feelings, and the more I think about it, the more I feel like he's right. He says I don't know what family means, and it hurts me because I've always thought I've valued family above everything else… but maybe I've just taken it all for granted. I just can't believe I didn't see it myself. I feel so stupid and phony right now, I have no idea what I'm going to do", Amy said as another wave of tears started to stream down her cheeks.

"You'll fix it, just like you always do. With horses, with people, with yourself. You have it in you", Jack said, gently caressing Amy's blonde her. "That's what you do."

"But maybe I've been so broken all my life I don't even know what whole means", came Amy's choked up reply. "With dad leaving, then mom dying… my ups and downs with Ty… I don't think I've ever been whole. It's like I've only fixed things with temporary solutions."

"Well, that's not a good foundation to build anything on", Jack agreed. "But you don't have to stay broken. You can try to fix yourself - the only person stopping you is you."

"But I don't know what I'm doing…" Amy pulled herself into a sitting position and then took some tissues from the nightstand, trying to dry her tears. Her head was beginning to hurt from the dehydration cause by all the crying.

"Sometimes you just have to learn to trust the journey. You might not know the whole plan now, but you start somewhere, and in the end, you will look back and realize all the mistakes and pitfalls taught you something", Jack spoke. "Maybe this… heartbreak is just another pitfall."

"But where do I begin…?" Amy said, turning her eyes on Jack.

"You start from not repeating the same patterns and you have to be brutally honest with yourself. I know it won't be pretty, but it's necessary if you really want to feel good about yourself. You work through your problems with others and then you'll see you have healed yourself in the process. Think of it like this: if you could choose to be anyone in the world, would you be yourself? If not, then you have to become the person you would like to be. Talk to everyone, it's not too late, you've not lost us", Jack advised.

"Maybe not you guys, but I've lost Ty, forever", Amy fell into her grandfather's outstretched arms and into the safety of his embrace. "I can't blame him for leaving, I wouldn't like myself either if I met me."

"Maybe it's best if you guys work on things on your own for now. It feels like there's still too much hurt between you two for anything to work right now", Jack suggested and felt Amy nodding against his chest. "You're gonna be okay, I'm sure of it."


	46. Chapter 46

For Ty, the road back to his apartment seemed to have lots of detours as he could needed the time with the wind blowing on his face to think. He drove around for hours on his motorcycle just to clear his head and let all of the nervous energy he had stored up leave his body. Ty knew he had done what he had come to do, yet he still had not expected it to take this sort of toll on him. Things had been building up inside him and now all that was able to be released as he now knew the situation with Amy would no longer cause him anxiety or depression.

Eventually, he steered his bike back toward Calgary, but as he was about to pass Caleb's trailer, Ty decided to pay him a visit, since Caleb had been such a good middleman in setting up the meeting with Amy.

Knocking on the door, Ty waited until Caleb was ready to come and meet him. Unlike the cowboy, Ty had never had the habit of just walking in, not really giving a damn about who was inside and what they were doing, even if the trailer was basically his second home and Caleb wouldn't have probably minded either way. Ty cherished his own privacy and wished to give that opportunity to others too, but what he didn't know was that without meaning to Ty was about to discover one of Caleb's secrets.

"Hey, man!" Caleb said cheerfully after finding his best friend behind the trailer door. "Come on in. Haven't seen you in a while. What's up?"

"I was just around and I decided to pop in for a minute", Ty spoke as he walked inside and made himself comfortable on Caleb's easy chair. "Uh, so I saw Amy today", he told his friend and felt something soft press against his bottom. He shifted his weight on the right, leaning against the arm of the chair and tried to fish out the thing that made his sitting position uncomfortable. "Thanks for setting that up."

"No problem. So... how did that go?" Caleb asked while walking to the fridge and taking out two bottles of beer. Ty declined the drink by shaking his head and Caleb then put the other beer back.

"It went-", Ty started to explain, but then dug out a purple nightgown under himself, confusingly fiddling it at first and then frowning as he lifted his eyes at Caleb. When the other guy noticed what Ty was holding, his face turned red and he quickly took it to place it elsewhere. "You have a new... squeeze...?"

"Uh..." Caleb laughed, scratching his neck nervously with his free hand.

"Well...?" Ty asked.

"Promise me you're not gonna get mad", Caleb said and opened his beer bottle nervously. Ty nodded, wondering why would he get mad about Caleb having a new girlfriend. "You have to know I didn't plan it, but when she contacted me after finding my wallet - the one I misplaced when we were at the bar after you came back and which you probably have no recollection whatsoever -, I decided to take her out for a coffee, to say thanks, and we hit it off. One thing lead to another... and..." he gave Ty a meaningful look.

"Okay okay, I get the picture but... I'm still confused as to why I should get mad about that?" Ty tried his best to understand. Maybe he no longer hooked up with random girls himself, but if that was what Caleb wanted to do, Ty had no problem with it.

"Well, you know her", Caleb admitted. Ty's eyes went to where Caleb had ditched the nightgown and he started going through all the women he knew who would wear clothing like that.

"Just tell me who it is before I start getting paranoid", Ty asked, when all he could come up with were Lou and Amy. Amy might have not wore those kind of things before, but Ty could remember she had changed her style while staying in France and he had even made a comment about it to her while visiting.

"It's Cass", Caleb finally admitted and Ty's eyebrows jumped up.

"Cass...? As in my colleague, Cassandra Lee?" he checked. Caleb confirmed it by nodding. Ty had to admit he had not seen that one coming. As weird as it was, he was relieved to know it was neither Amy nor Lou, seeing he had only just broke up with Amy and Lou was married. "So, uh... how long has this been going on...?" Ty could not recall Cassandra mentioning anything about it - even though she must have known he and Caleb were close friends.

"Since few days after you moved out", Caleb told him. Ty started nodding, trying to process it. He finally figured he wouldn't say anything about it, even if it felt weird that such unlike pair had found each other. Then again, Ty had never thought Ashley to be Caleb's type either, but they had eventually married anyway. "So, are you mad...?"

"What? No? It's cool. I mean, if you're happy, I'm happy", Ty assured. Caleb seemed relieved and his signature smile returned back to his face.

"So, anyway - about Amy...?" Caleb reminded.

"Oh yeah, uh", Ty tried to remember what he had even said. Not much, yet he wasn't sure that there was anything different he could have said. "I think we're done for good this time. I just don't see a way back to where we were. She's still as stubborn as I thought her to be and she sees me so much different than I see her. At least she apologized, but we just want different things and it wouldn't work. I don't think there's any room for a compromise. To think that I would go back to that relationship, just to wait until she'd come around, just feels exhausting..."

"So, maybe she shouldn't have gone to Europe at all. I mean, it changed everything, right?" Caleb asked, trying to hold back his "I told you so". "She changed."

"You know, the more I think about it, the more I feel like maybe she already had this in her, but something kept her back - maybe it was me or a fear to face unknown, I don't know. Because otherwise this doesn't make any sense. It's like she needed a catalyst, and seeing the world was that for her. You know she's always been here, thinking she's happy to be where she's at, but she has options now. And I mean, I get it - she has huge potential and this might not look like much to her anymore, but I just wish things would have ended differently", Ty shrugged.

"So... what do you want then?" Caleb asked.

"Same things I've always wanted. Nothing's changed, only the person who I want it with has - though I don't know who that is yet", Ty spoke. "I still want to have a career, help animals, get married, have kids, maybe own a dog."

"What's stopping you from doing something else?" Caleb asked. "Nothing's holding you back anymore - you could go out there and do something crazy. She is."

"Yeah, but I don't need that. I've done my share of crazy already and I'm over that phase. I just wanna feel secure and know that my love is felt and returned. To me, wanting to get married isn't settling for something less than what's out there. I come from a place where I never thought I could be worth loving or I could love someone the way they deserve to be loved, but I know now that I am able to love and that I deserve better than I thought I did. Whatever Amy's doing right now might be what she calls freedom, but to me I've found that freedom in loving. I don't need to search myself anymore, I know exactly who I am and what I want", Ty explained.

"Wow... Wish I could say the same", Caleb admitted after thinking about it for a while. After Ashley had divorced him, he had lost his way and was simply drifting along with the current, hoping that someday he would find the right direction again.

"You might. Sometimes you can find that from another person, sometimes you already have it in you, but you just need that catalyst to realize it. Amy and I are on different paths right now", Ty summed it up. "And it's okay. I think it's better this way."

"Well, like you said, as long as you're happy, I'm happy", Caleb said and took a sip from his bottle, wondering about his thing with Cassandra. "I feel so bad..."

"What for?" Ty asked.

"For rubbing the whole Cassandra thing to your face, seeing you've just broken up with Amy."

"No, man, don't worry about it, it's cool", Ty said. "What you have going on has nothing to do with me, even if you're my best friend and she's someone I work with. It's all good."

"Good. Wouldn't want that to come between us", Caleb admitted. "Because I've learned with me women come and go, but friends are forever."

"Yeah", Ty smiled. He helped himself up and walked over to Caleb to give him a friendly hug, complete with pats on the back and some awkward laughing. "Anyway. I better be going, it's getting pretty late. I just wanted to come and see you. Catch you later?"

"You bet", Caleb nodded. "You're welcome to visit anytime."

"I'll keep that in mind", Ty said thankfully as he walked out of the door.


	47. Chapter 47

Lou's voice penetrated Amy's thoughts as the white noise that had blocked out everything shifted. The younger sister had no idea how long she had tuned Lou out, but felt like she had not missed much as she began to process the words she was speaking.

"I mean, moving out just feels like a natural next step, you know. I've been saying it for years now, but we've never really followed through for whatever reason", Lou said as she took clothes from the laundry basket and put them in the washing machine located in the mudroom. "It's like the start of something new. Of course, there's still a long way to go before we could actually be living in a new house, but Peter's coming home this weekend and we'll hopefully get everything started. There's so much to do."

Amy kept poking her breakfast as she didn't feel like eating it. For days now she had been like a zombie walking around in a daze and unaware of anything going on around her. She had no idea what to do next and wasn't even that motivated to look for answers as nothing really mattered. The sun came up, she simply existed the whole day and then the sun went down and then she would lay awake on her bed, feeling heavy and numb until her body finally gave out and she fell into a restless dream.

Then it was time for another, similar day.

"Seriously..." Lou sighed, looking around to see if the coast was clear, lowering her voice to make sure her grandfather or Lisa couldn't hear her. "You know I love Lisa, but don't you think it's odd she's around, like, a lot? I mean look at this", she said and showed Amy a pair of Lisa's pants. "She even does laundry here!"

Amy didn't even make a comment to Lou's rant, and it was okay as Lou was fine just talking to herself but liked having an listener.

"Well, I guess it's good for Grampa's heart to have him happy. So I might as well wash these pants since they are here in the basket and Lisa probably needs a change of clothes if she stays for the night", Lou went on and started going through the pockets before putting the pants inside the laundry machine.

Something caught her attention and she then pulled out a pair of rings.

"What's this...?" she placed the pants on the table for the time being and examined her findings. At first she thought they might have been from Lisa's marriage to Dan, but as soon as Lou saw the engraving with Jack's name accompanied with a date, she put two and two together. A shocked "oh my god" escaped from her lips as she rushed to Amy. "Look, look! I think Lisa and Grampa have married! I mean what else could this mean?!"

It made Amy bat an eye, but she didn't say anything as she didn't know what she could have said to that. "Good for them"? To Lou it might have been scandalous, but to Amy it didn't matter whether they were engagement or married or neither.

"Tim asked me to go look for new horses with him, so I guess that's what I'll be doing today", Lou and Amy heard Jack saying from the bedroom to Lisa even before they had walked out of the room. Continuing his conversation with Lisa, they walked to the kitchen, still completely oblivious of what Lou had just found.

"Are you guys married?" Lou pressed immediately and both Jack and Lisa stopped to exchange worried looks. When they returned their gazes to Lou, she was holding Lisa's engagement ring and wedding band in front of herself so they couldn't escape from the questions she was about to shoot at them.

"Well, we, uh..." Jack stammered.

"Lou, you have to understand-" Lisa tried to explain when her husband seemed to be incapable of doing so. Lou's eyes were wide and they went from Jack to Lisa, in hopes of finding more answers.

"Oh, I'm trying to understand! This says December 2013″, Lou said, taking a firm hold on the rings said. "It's been months and you haven't said a word?"

"We wanted to, but seeing as things were kind of messy at the time - and still are - we just didn't know how to bring it up in a conversation", Lisa tried and glanced at Jack, but much to her disappointment the old man was useless in this situation.

Amy got up from her chair, took her plate to the sink and quietly walked to the mudroom. Lou's eyes now followed her and Lisa used this opportunity to give Jack a slap on his side for not being supportive at this moment.

"Where are you going?" Lou asked Amy. She had hoped to have Amy as a back-up, hoping to intimidate more answers from the elderly couple.

"To the barn", Amy said and walked out after putting on her boots.

"See?" Lisa pointed out when the screen door slammed shut. "This is exactly what we were trying to avoid", she went on and Lou turned back to face her, looking puzzled. "We were trying to be considerate of Amy."

"Yeah", Jack finally stepped in.

"What do you mean?" Lou asked.

"Well, we got married the night Amy had that Futurity Race and when she left for France, it was big deal for her and we didn't want to steal her thunder", Lisa explained further.

"And then we were hoping to tell everyone when she'd come back. But things fell apart between Ty and Amy and it just didn't seem the right time to tell everyone we are married", Jack continued where Lisa had left off.

"But why didn't you guys just tell us about this before the Futurity Race?" was what Lou wanted to know.

"Because we didn't really plan it - it just happened. Jack proposed to me out of the blue and we really wanted to keep it simple. We figured the more we would wait, the bigger things would get. And we wanted absolutely no fuss", Lisa spoke.

"Besides, why does it even matter to you? Nothing's changed", Jack said.

"But... everything's changed - you guys are married!" Lou insisted.

"Not for us it hasn't. We're still the same", Jack replied.

"He doesn't even wear a ring and I won't change my last name. So... it's mostly just something between us", Lisa shrugged. "No big deal."

"I just feel so... blind-sided", Lou said and sat down. "I would have wanted to be there, I would have wanted to celebrate it with you."

"We appreciate that, Lou, but... this is how we wanted it", Jack replied and walked over to his granddaughter. "And besides, there's so much going on right now that we want to focus on the future and not the past."

His hands adjusted on Lou's shoulders but his eyes looked out of the window. Jack could see Amy walking toward the barn with tired steps and he couldn't help but feel bad for his own happiness, even if there was no reason to feel that way. But as a grandparent, you always wanted to put your grandchild's needs and happiness before your own. Seemed like at the time it was hard for Amy to find anything to be happy about.


	48. Chapter 48

Amy stood in the doorway of the barn, next to the saddle racks, and watched Spartan standing in his stall. The gelding had his head out and he was staring Amy, as if taunting her, and she could tell from the look in his eye that the horse wasn't in a co-operating mood today either. The more time that past, the more Amy feared she would never connect with Spartan again. The insecurity she felt was overtaking her more and more each day, and it was becoming harder to overcome as she had let it take root. The irony of the situation was that Spartan had always been her "mane to cry on", but now he was the reason she needed comfort and support.

It also reminded her of her situation with Ty. After coming home from France, Amy had been like a survivor from a ship wreck floating on the sea, waiting for an island to come along so she could swim to the shore and consider herself saved. In the past when she faced situations like this, it had been helpful to have Ty there as her safe haven, but since they weren't even friends anymore, Amy had lost her first two options. With her losing her connection with Spartan and ties cut with Ty, her options were becoming slim. Somewhere deep inside Amy knew she had to talk to someone, but explaining it all to someone new just felt like too much of a task. With Spartan, he had been all she needed when all she needed was an ear to listen and someone who would be there for her. With Ty, he already knew her well enough to know her history, characteristics and reasoning, so all she would have had to do was catch him up with what was going on in her life. That had always been followed by a point of view or an encouragement to include a hug that seemed to absorb all the fears and tensions and make them go away.

Sure Lou knew her too, but Amy felt like she had no insight about the horse side of things, even if she had once ridden a lot and still did occasionally. Lou could never understand what Amy shared with horses, not like their mom had.

As for Jack... well, he was apparently bathing in the wedded bliss and Amy didn't want to ruin that for him - seemed like Lou was already doing enough damage there as it was...

Sighing, Amy was headed toward the barn office when she noticed her beautifully adorned saddle with its golden plate inscribed with "Miracle Girl" on it. It had been a generous gift from the prince and had helped restore Amy's faith in herself twice; first time was when she had hit a professional dry spell and second time was after her accident that had left her blind for days and struggling with post-traumatic stress disorder. The way her family and friends had had faith in her, had helped Amy recover from those tough times quicker.

Now it all seemed silly; Amy had hit another dead end but and couldn't see a way out of it, and the saddle, that had once been as source of inspiration, was now only a painful reminder of her (used-to-be) title. If she wasn't even able to work with her own horse, how was she to help any other horse? Was it time to give up the business and move on?

Amy returned her thoughts to the problem at hand and left the saddle to gather more dust as she continued quest as she walked to the office. She went straight to the bookshelf and let her fingers dance on the edges of the books, eventually pulling out a journal that had belonged to her mother. Amy had started a journal of her own, but she felt like her entries were only naive versions from of Marion's words of wisdom. It was times like these that really made her miss her mother - not that she didn't miss her every day. It would have been so easy to just ask from her if there was something she was doing wrong. It seemed like whatever Spartan was going through - or more like _she and Spartan_ were going through - was an emotional disconnection, and if join up wouldn't help, she had to try something else, but what?

Sometime later, Georgie walked into the barn and noticed Amy reading as she sat on top the hay bales that she had left there with Jack, leaning against the wall that had the black board with a daily schedule on it her head was just inches away from smudging the chalk with her hair. Amy seemed to be lost in thought, so Georgie snapped her out of it by greeting her.

"Hey, Amy!"

"Oh, hey, Georgie", Amy said as she glanced at the girl. She was always full of energy and it was evident from the way she nearly pranced over her horse, Phoenix. "What's up?" she decided to ask her niece.

"Nothing much. I just came from Stephen's. He wanted me to try this cool new saddle he had bought for Rex. – Rex is his horse, in case you didn't know", Georgie spoke as she turned to face Phoenix. The white horse was looking for treats from her pocket, but instead got few scratches behind his ear. "Good boy…" Georgie spoke gently and then went to fetch Phoenix's grooming kit. She glanced at Amy, whose eyes were back on the journal, and twisted her head sideways in order to see the cover of the book Amy was reading. Unable to see the front cover she gave up and asked, "What's that?"

"It's my mom's journal", Amy explained and showed her the cover, as she did she felt something slip from between the pages into her lap. She gathered them into her hand so that none of them would be lost. "I'm trying to get Spartan used to me again by sitting here. Maybe that's what he needs right now. And since I have nothing but time, I might as well use it here." She glanced at the black horse who was still eyeing her. She let out a sigh as she felt her body shutter from the weight of it all. "I don't know what to do. It's almost like I'm too close to the problems to be able to see it all objectively. I really hope mom has written something here I can use - she was so good with these types of things. I could use her guidance right about now."

"You are good with horses too", Georgie complimented. It made Amy smile a little bit, but the smile soon faded away as her insecurity would not let her dwell on such nice things.

"She taught me things, but I have a way to go before I get to where she was at. I don't even know if the key to it all is in learning from the reading, or more from listening and observation. Opening up my senses, or something like that", Amy said, as she shared her thoughts.

"Well, I hope you find something", Georgie said. She had become more and more aware that Amy couldn't handle her own horse right now, and it was becoming a problem for her. Something about Amy obviously irritated Spartan, but since Georgie had no idea what it was, she decided to change the subject. "Did Lou tell you that we are planning to move out?"

"Yeah, she mentioned it", Amy recalled from her talk with Lou.

"I'm gonna miss you and Heartland, but it's a good thing we won't be living far away, so I can come visit any time I want." Georgie spoke as she continued to comb out Phoenix's coat. "And my horses will stay here, according to what Lou has told me.

There was a silence before Amy finally spoke her mind. "Seems like everyone's moving on - except me", Amy stated, almost sadly. "You, Lou, Peter, Grampa, Lisa… even Ty…" She was losing them all with no idea what to do next and with no ambitions or goals to look forward too.

"So... it's definite then? You and Ty are not gonna get back together?" Georgie had to ask because it had been bothering her for a while now.

Amy shook her head, a blank expression on her face. It was slowly hitting her that what she was saying wasn't just a sentence she kept repeating, but a truth and something that would always be part of her future - the absence of her best friend.

"No. I don't think we ever were after we broke up, but I still hoped we could be friends. But he doesn't want anything to do with me, so..." she shrugged and deciding not to burden Georgie with it any more than she had.

The young girl nodded, saddened by what seemed to be a final decision. It was another person, missing from her life.

As Amy set her eyes back to the journal, she put the clippings from her hand between the pages, where they belonged, she and couldn't help but notice a picture of Marion and her old friend, Victor Whitetail, there among them. Amy recalled seeing the picture years ago and was willing to bet she could probably recite the words written on the back of it in her sleep, still she flipped it over and read it again anyway.

 _"To my courageous warrior woman. Love, Victor."_

Maybe a saddle wasn't enough to restore her faith in herself, but perhaps someone from the past was, seeing as he had done it once before and not only for her, but for her mother as well.

"I gotta make a phone call", Amy said, closing the pictures and clippings between the pages of the journal before jumping up and making her way back to the barn office.


	49. Chapter 49

_Sorry, I've been a little sick, but here's a new chapter!_

 _* * * *_

Next morning, Amy watched as Georgie loaded Spartan into the trailer. The horse was behaving well and didn't even hesitate going in, and it made Amy feel bad, that she would have welcomed any sign of reluctance about now just to prove that it wasn't something that she did that caused the problems with Spartan. On some level she feared Victor would not believe her and Spartan would be on his best behavior at his place and as soon as they returned to Heartland, Spartan would be back to playing hard to get. Victor was her last hope and Amy hoped that this trip would not be in vain.

Jack was standing next to his old truck the he had so willingly loaned to his granddaughter for taking the trip to Victor Whitetail's. "You sure about this?" he asked as he checked Amy reaction.

"Yeah, absolutely. I have to try, because something has to change", Amy explained. Jack nodded and it seemed like there was something he wanted to say, but wasn't sure how to put it into words. He opened his mouth but then pressed his lips back together, repeating the same thing few times.

"This has nothing to do with yesterday, does it…?" he finally asked.

"What do you mean?" Amy asked.

"Well… Lou finding out about me and Lisa. I don't want you to think that we wouldn't want to keep you in the loop or…" he was trying to find words.

"No", Amy shook her head before Jack could go any further. "This has nothing to do with you guys, it's all about me and Spartan. I'm really happy for you both, I am, I'm sorry I didn't say anything yesterday when we found out", she assured Jack. "I know it might not seem like it, since I haven't really been in the of best spirits lately, but I'm really glad you guys finally tied the knot. It was about time." A smile played on Amy's lips and it made Jack feel a little more at ease. At least she still knew how to smile.

"Thank you", Jack said giving Amy a loving hug. It felt good to have Amy's blessing to something that was so important to him.

Lisa helped Georgie with the ramp of the horse trailer and watched as her husband and Amy hugged. It seemed like they were in a good place, so maybe Amy had not been so shocked , to receive the news about their marriage after all. It had been hard to tell since she had left for barn immediately after the unplanned announcement. But perhaps she had needed time to think about it before coming into any conclusion of how she felt about it.

Lou leaned against the gate that welcomed the guests to the ranch house, with Katie in her arms, and watched her sister embrace their grandfather. She was still bitter on some level about Jack and Lisa's "wedding announcement" and had barely talked to them since. It wasn't the fact that they had gotten married, but that they had not thought to include their family into such an important celebration, and she couldn't understand why neither Lisa nor Jack could see why she was so upset about it. All they seemed to focus on was Amy and how she was taking the news.

When Jack released Amy from his embrace, he took a step back and let Lou have her turn at talking with her sister. Lou eyed Jack as she walked pass him and then went to Amy.

"Do you have everything you need?" she asked like aworried mother.

"Yes. Clothes, GPS and snacks. I'm good", Amy assured her sister.

"And Victor knows you're coming?" Lou asked.

"Yeah. I called him yesterday and he said that he would be happy to have me as a guest", Amy explained. Georgie walked up to give Amy a hug.

"I can't believe you are leaving again. You just got here", she murmured against Amy's red jacket. Georgie loved having family closer to her age and someone to share the horsey stuff with.

"Well, this time it won't be for months", Amy said and caressed Georgie's back.

"So how long will you be? You need me to look after the horses?" Georgie asked.

"I don't know yet, but I trust you and Grampa will make the horses comfortable and know they will be taken care of while I'm away", Amy replied. "You did such a good job with them when I was in Europe that I don't think I need to worry about them."

"Thanks, Amy", Georgie said, smiling, and taking a step back from the hug.

"You will text us when you get there, right?" asked a worried Lou and it was her turn to hug Amy. Amy nodded and gently hugged her sister because not only was she hugging Lou, but Katie was caught between their hug too.

"Good, and we will", Lou said. "I'm gonna miss you…"

"I'm gonna miss you guys too", Amy said as they released each other from their embrace. She pinched Katie's cheek gently and it made the little girl laugh. "I'll see you soon."

"I hope you find out what's going on", Georgie said as they started to retreat from Amy. The younger Fleming sister nodded and sighed. "Me too."

She waved at Lisa, who was standing next to Jack at the gate, and then took one last look at the ranch. It never got easier leaving the place even if it was just for few days. But by now she knew that every time she left, she never came back the same. World was always teaching her something new but while it was exciting most of the time, the ties to the ranch didn't remain the same after that. Ever since Europe, Heartland had no longer felt like home, but more like a house that she had had her childhood memories in. Even her room was still a mess because it needed some serious rearranging now that she was no longer the same young horse crazy girl she had been.

Amy hopped behind the wheel and waved everyone goodbye from the side window before she started the truck and left to face her next new adventure. The difference between the last time and this was that Amy wanted to come back different. She wanted to come back wiser and stronger, and she was hoping that Victor Whitetail would somehow able to help her with it.

* * * *

When Amy arrived at Victor's house few hours later, she half expected to see the man golfing like he had been the last time Amy had been here. But the field was empty and there were no golf clubs in sight.

Amy started to panic. What if Victor wasn't around and she was supposed to get Spartan out of the trailer all by herself? What if something bad happened because the horse seemed to resent her these days? But even if she wasn't too keen on getting the gelding out on her own, Amy knew, she couldn't let Spartan just stand inside the trailer for hours either.

Fortunately, Victor walked of his house just as Amy was getting the truck parked. A sigh of relief escaped from her as she took out the keys and stepped out.

"Amy. So nice to see you!" Victor greeted her and Amy smiled at him, already feeling like this had been the right choice. I mean, who else had the kind of insight on horses and life as this man? No one she knew, that was for sure.

"So nice to see you too. It's been a while", Amy said as she walked up to meet him. The man reached out his arm and shook hands with her. "And thank you for making time for me, I know it was very short notice, but I just desperately need your help."

"Well, I will see what I can do. And don't worry, I always make time for old friends", he spoke and assured her with a kind smile. "So, what seems to be the problem?"

"You remember my horse, Spartan?" Amy asked as she dug out her cellphone so that she could text Lou that she had made it. She wanted to get that out of the way now while she still remembered to do it. "Sorry, I just had to text my sister and let her know I arrived."

"Yeah, I remember Spartan", Victor said when they both reached the rear of the trailer. He eyed Amy's phone for a while and just as she was about to put it back to her pocket, he reached his hand out. "Before we go any further, let's just make a deal first. No cellphones here."

"Oh… Right. Sorry", Amy said, taking the phone out and handed it to Victor after shutting it off. Victor seemed pleased as he placed it into his pocket for the time being.

Amy recalled him doing this the last time too; he had taken away her watch and cellphone and his reasoning for that had been that horses didn't know the time like humans didso they shouldn't be so concerned about it either. Things took as long as they needed.

"So… Spartan?" Victor went back to their original conversation. "How has he been doing?"

"Good mostly, but… lately we've sort of had some problems", Amy explained. "I was at Europe for four months and when I got back, he wasn't the same. We haven't been able to connect since then."

"You tried the join-up?" Victor guessed.

"I did", Amy nodded. "But it was like he was refusing to come to me for some reason."

"And how is he otherwise?" Victor asked. "When you're grooming him, for example."

"That's the thing, I haven't been able to really get close to him. He backs away, like he doesn't want to be around me anymore", Amy explained further.

"Hmm… Okay. Let's see how you two will do in the pen. Take him out", Victor said and stepped back.

Amy seemed lost and was almost panicking. "Me…?" she asked.

"Yes, you. Who else?" Victor replied. "Let's view this as step one."

"O-okay", Amy stuttered, feeling her confidence disappear completely. She opened the ramp as she tried to control her nerves as best as she could. But when she saw Spartan, she wasn't sure this was going to end well. "Maybe… you could help?"

"Amy, you can't let fear control you or you are going to run rest of your life. Nip it in the bud while you still can. You've done it before and you don't need me to do it for you", Victor was being strict. Amy nodded and sighed. He was right; she couldn't just let other people do the work for her, she had to be able to do it by herself.

After opening the side door, Amy took her time standing outside before she went into the trailer for unloading. Spartan stared at her and Amy could already feel how the horse was testing her. But she tried to cut it short and walked into the trailer, acting confident.

"Hey, boy. You wanna go outside? It's a lovely day", she spoke to him. Spartan stood calmly and Amy felt her spirits rise a little bit. Maybe she could do it after all.

But as Spartan was backing out, his steps became hurried and he dragged Amy out with him. Victor stood and watched the scene from the side, knowing that Amy wasn't in any immediate danger, she just needed to get the situation under control.

"Hey, woah woah!" Amy tried her best to calm Spartan down. "Easy, easy!"

Spartan then calmed a little, but he was still evidently nervous at the end of his lead. When Amy was able to get a breath, he looked at Victor. "You see what I mean?"

"I do, I really do", Victor said and Amy could tell he was already making up his theories. "Walk him up to the pen and we'll see how the join-up goes.


	50. Chapter 50

After another failed join-up, Amy was fighting to hold back the tears as she stood in the middle of the pen. On the one hand, she was relieved that at least Victor was now able to see there really were problems, but it didn't make her feel any better about herself as she was wallowing in the humiliation of her failure.

Miracle Girl was not so miraculous anymore.

"So… what's your verdict?" Amy asked shamefully as Spartan to run around in the pen and it didn't look like there was much hope for him to deciding to come to her.

Victor jumped down from the fence where he had been seated keeping an eye on Amy and Spartan. As he walked to the middle of the pen, his steps were heavy and his mind deep in thought. At first the man just stood there, watching as Spartan ran around the ring. Amy watched as he rose up to the tip of his shoe and returned down to his heels, all while still standing in the same spot, as if trying to match the rhythm of the horse. It was like he was riding the horse mentally.

"Let me try something", Victor said and then he started to run along with the horse. As Amy watched, she turned slowly on the heel of her boot causing it to sink into the dirt as she followed them circling the pen. She made small smooth movements so that Spartan wouldn't get distracted by her. Amy wanted to see what Victor would do and how it would be different from what she had done.

The man asked the gelding to change directions few times with a simple movement of his hand and Spartan obeyed without any resistance.

Finally the pace of Spartan's hooves got lazier and he started to hang his head lower. Amy knew that this was the sign Victor had been waiting for. The man walked to the middle of the pen, out of breath, and stood right next to her and waited patiently.

Within few seconds Spartan was touching Victor's shoulder with his muzzle, thus completing the join-up.

"What did I do wrong?" Amy immediately asked.

"I'd say it's more about what you didn't do; you weren't present. The problem isn't the horse", Victor replied knowingly. "It's not like he didn't tire, he wanted to join up but felt like he couldn't with you." Amy had suspected that much, but it was still hard to swallow. "So the question is - what's going on with you?" Victor asked as he started to rub Spartan's neck as a reward for his co-operation. "Are you out of balance?"

Amy laughed joylessly. "You have no idea…"

"Why don't we take a walk and you can tell me all about it", Victor suggested.

"Yeah, okay", Amy nodded as she looked longingly at Spartan. She really wanted to go to her horse, but was afraid she would scare him away. It was best to let him be for a while and come back when she was in a better place mentally.

Amy and Victor walked by the river as she explained everything about the prince, her plans with Ty and how they had eventually broken up. She didn't leave out a thing about her thinking that her future was out there or how she had felt miserable after coming back to Heartland. Victor never interrupted her, but simply nodded as they walked along, listening carefully to each word and the way it was said. At first it felt strange opening up and trying to explain her life at the moment to someone who was just an acquaintance. But Amy had decided it was time for her to be honest with herself, just like Ty had suggested and opening up to Victor seemed like the best way to do that at the moment. If she really wanted to make things better, she had to realize what was so wrong in the first place.

"I see", Victor finally said when Amy took a long breath after her monologue. "Well, I kind of figured something big was going on with you, it all makes sense now."

"How…?" Amy asked curiously. She had thought herself to be a big mystery, because she had not been able to figure herself out. So what had Victor seen in her that she hadn't?

"The way someone acts around a horse is very telling", Victor explained. "But I think you of all people already know that. Maybe if you were looking at yourself through my eyes, you could see that you were practically telling me everything about your problems as if you were an open book. Take for example the way you unloaded Spartan from the trailer", he went on. "First, you were trying to make me do the work for you, because I think you were afraid to make a mistake. So that if something would have gone wrong, it would have been Spartan's doing and not yours. You weren't working as a team like you were supposed to - I bet he trusted you to make sure things would go okay, but you weren't really concerned for him, only for yourself and how it'd make you look in my eyes. You were trying to please me, but for what? You're not here to make me feel better. This is about you."

Amy's gaze dropped to the ground as she listened to Victor's words. They were harsh, but true. She couldn't deny Victor's input and realized maybe it wasn't just Spartan he was talking about, maybe it was the way she had treated Ty too.

"For whatever reason you wanted to distance yourself from Spartan so that he would be the one to blame and not you if things went wrong. And, well, horses can't speak for themselves, so it's easy to place the blame on them, but I'm not buying what you're trying to sell", Victor said before noticing Amy's face was getting paler. "You want me to go on…?"

"Yeah, it's okay. I can take it", Amy assured him, nodding like a champ. Sometimes truth hurt and she just had to accept that.

"Okay, so…" Victor said trying to remember where he had left off. "The next thing I saw was you standing as far as you could from him, while he was in the lead. It was like you two were connected but not really." He shook his head. "There was too much distance and no proof of you doing whatever it would take to work as a team. And that's all up to you, Amy. Horses can choose if they want to go along with you or if they don't. And the way I saw it Spartan wanted to join up, but he just didn't get any response from you that said you were willing as well. You kept telling yourself that you were there together, but your connection was all out of whack", Victor spoke and Amy listened carefully. She could remember Jack saying basically the same thing when she had been driving Spartan in the pen back at Heartland.

"In the pen", Victor continued after taking a breath, "you tried to force the connection and it made Spartan want to keep running. Who's to say what would have happened if you had gotten your way. Maybe it would have determined the way you two would have worked from there on out. It was Spartan's survival instinct that kept him running and I'm glad it did. You are never supposed to be the boss of a horse, only a gentle leader, but ideally a partner too."

Again, the parallels with Ty. She had kidded herself into thinking they were still friends, but Ty had not seen it that way, and for whatever reason it had only started to make sense to her now that Victor was telling it from his point of view. Granted, it was about her and Spartan, but it might have as well been about her and Ty.

Why was it so hard to see the truth in the statement made by someone you love when you are having an argument or they are telling you something you don't want to hear? Is it that you have that feeling you are right and they don't understand or have you twisted the truth so much that it no longer looks like the truth? Do you feel that if you give in once, it will determinate the future of your whole relationship? If you show your weak spots, they will surely strike there the next time there is a fight. It was hard to admit you were only a human when the arguments you had always had were accusing one another about something and not focusing how to fix the situation. There was no real communication there.

One always had to take the blame and ideally, it always had to be the other one.

"Amy? You okay?" Victor asked seeing Amy's face was turned toward the river and hearing she was sniffling. Turning her gaze back Victor, Amy felt embarrassed about the way her emotions were coming out, but it was better to let them out than to bottle them up.

"Yeah. What you're saying makes sense", Amy admitted to him, wiping away her tears. "I've been selfish and I've been trying to force things to happen and I haven't been the kind of partner he deserves. I guess it's my pride that has kept me so blind."

At this point, she could have been speaking about Spartan or Ty, it made no difference as it applied to both.

"Well, now you see", Victor said, feeling relief about not hurting Amy's feelings. It was just the bad stuff coming out. The way she handled the criticism reminded him of her mother. "I can't help but think about your mother and the last time she came here. She was lost too, just like you are now. I don't think you need my help with Spartan, but you need help with yourself."

"What did my mom do? How did she find herself? She seemed to have it all figured out… I remember the letter you gave me the last time I was here", Amy spoke. "She wrote that she had found her way back to her heart, her gift and her kids. She was somehow able to face her fears and move on to the next chapter of her life. How…?"

"She did something my people call a Vision Quest", Victor revealed. He remembered it as if it had happened just yesterday. "I did one too when I was moving from teenage years into adulthood. I feel like you might be going through the exact same thing right now."

"What's a Vision Quest?" Amy had to ask because it didn't make sense to her.

"A Vision Quest helps us find spiritual guidance and purpose as we communicate deeply with the fundamental forces and spiritual energies of creation and self-identity. It helped me to get profound insight of myself and the world, and I think it really worked for your mother too, as the letter says. The last time you were here, you only needed a little bit of guidance, but this time… it seems to be something more profound. I feel like you need help with seeing what the next chapter of your life might hold. So… what do you say?"

"When can we do it?" Amy asked fearlessly without even knowing what it really meant for her to do one. But it didn't matter, at this point she was ready to try almost anything.


	51. Chapter 51

Ty's day shift at the vet clinic was drawing to an end and he was making sure every animal had enough water to drink in their bowls and bottles. Trying his best not to stress the recovering pets, he wanted to be as swift as possible with his check-ups, keeping in mind to use a gentle yet firm touch trying to be a comfort to and not excite the little critters.

There were some tasks that needed to be done daily and Ty considered it polite to do them before the person with the night shift took over. Today he felt it was also a way for him to apologize to Cassandra for having the earlier shift. The young woman hated having the night shift since it, according to her, "made it harder for her to maintain a social life".

Before, Ty had not given too much thought to what Cassandra did outside the clinic, but now he knew a little bit better with whom she spent her time off with.

Ever since visiting Caleb's trailer, Ty couldn't think Cassandra in the same way. It seemed weird to him that people he knew from very different circles, had somehow been able to find each other without his assistance and had kept this secret relationship from him. He didn't have problem with it, but it was still going to take time for Ty to actually visualize Caleb and Cassandra as a couple since he had yet to see it with his own eyes.

Ty had no idea if Caleb had told his new girlfriend about him finding out about their relationship, but when Cassandra walked into the vet clinic, like there was a dark cloud hanging over her head, it seemed as if she was more annoyed than awkward, and it made Ty assume that maybe she was still oblivious to him knowing about the relationship.

"Hey", Ty greeted her.

"Hey…" Cassandra huffed, giving him the kind of response he had been expecting. Yup, something was up.

"What's the matter?" Ty asked as he closed the last cage door. "Uhm, everything?" Cassandra said, rolling her eyes.

"So, nothing new then." It wasn't unusual for Cassandra to be this wholeheartedly pessimistic, so Ty couldn't help but make a joke at her expense.

"Ha-ha", Cassandra laughed sarcastically. "Easy for you to say, Mr. Sunshine… You have everything you need: money, an apartment and a job."

"If you are stressing about the merger, let me remind you that nothing's been decided yet", Ty said. Scott had still not revealed which one of them would have to go when the merger with the another vet clinic happened, but Ty and Cassandra both expected him to make the decision any day now. "I could lose my job just as easily as you."

"If it seems like I don't appreciate your solidarity, it's because, well, I don't. I'm already mentally preparing myself to live on the streets, and you giving me false hope is just making me feel worse", Cassandra said as she went to wash her hands. "I am so poor already that I can't afford hope."

Ty watched as Cassandra hunched over the sink, and he tried his best to hold his tongue, but eventually couldn't - the opportunity was just too hard to pass up.

"Why don't you just move in with Caleb?"

Ty still kept an eye on Cassandra to see her reaction. The fellow vet assistant took out one of the paper towels from the holder and it seemed like she was wondering if she really had heard Ty right.

Had he just mentioned Caleb and her in the same breath?

Cassandra's movements were now slower and unsure, almost like her brain couldn't handle too many tasks at once.

"What…?" her voice was lighter and it revealed her hesitation.

"He has the trailer, so you could move there and split the cost of your rent. Problem solved", Ty shrugged as he turned and did the last few annotations on the pet charts to let everyone know that all the water had been checked. He was acting like the topic wasn't as much of a secret as Cassandra thought it to be. He could feel his friend's eyes boring a hole in the back of his head and could almost hear her questioning thoughts in the silence of the clinic.

"Wait… so you… know?" Cassandra asked eventually.

Ty nodded. "Yeah. Caleb told me."

"And… you're okay with it?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Ty asked and turned his eyes toward her.

Cassandra bit the side of her lip and avoided eye contact. "Just… I don't know", she shrugged. "Cause he's your friend and we work together?"

"Well, it's your business what you do outside work, so…" Ty said as he started to pack his back pack. "When push comes to shove, at least you're not alone. There's other kind of poorness too and it has nothing to do with money or possession. At least you have someone who cares about you. It might not seem like much, but trust me, it makes a big difference."

"Yeah", Cassandra agreed, feeling a little bit better about it. "Thanks, Ty."

"Don't mention it", he smiled a little and swung his bag strap over his shoulder. "Have a good night", Ty said before heading out.

"You too", Cassandra replied.

Ty did not get to go too far; as he walked out of the clinic he noticed a cardboard box with holes in it on the front steps. He looked around first, trying to see who had dropped it off, but there was no one in sight. Ty adjusted his back pack better on his shoulder and then exterminated the box, noticing a piece of paper taped on it.

 _"His mother was dead and I tried to keep him alive, but I can't do it anymore. I'm sorry. Take care of him, please."_

So there was something inside, Ty was able to see that much from the holes, but the letter didn't say what it was.

When he knelt down, Ty heard low noises that resembled the cries of a dog. Abandoned puppies weren't an unusual thing, so Ty figured maybe it was the case this time too.

Since the holes on the side were too small to allow him to peer inside, he had to open the lid to really know what the box hid within.

And when he did, Ty couldn't believe his eyes.

"Oh my god…"

Just minutes after leaving, Ty walked back inside the clinic, holding a cardboard box in his hands. Cassandra gave him a long look.

"Did you forget how to get out of here?" she inquired, wondering why he had come back into the clinic.

"Was this outside when you came in?" Ty asked as he carefully placed the box on the table.

Cassandra eyed it and shook her head. "No. I would have noticed. What is it?"

"It had this letter on it", Ty explained as he handed the paper to Cassandra. She read it quickly and raised her brows.

"Did you look inside…?"

She had also realized something living was inside and the young woman wasn't too comfortable with this feeling of not knowing what it was.

Ty went to get himself a pair of examination gloves before answering. He then opened the lid and Cassandra peeked carefully inside, feeling her heart starting to beat faster because of the anticipation.

Gently, Ty pulled out a wolf pup that couldn't have not been older than few weeks. The fluffy pup looked around curiously and made little noises. Cassandra's heart melted.

"Oh my god, he's so cute!" she sighed. "Yeah, but… he's not the kind of animal we treat", Ty said. "Or look after."

"Well, at least whoever dumped him here didn't abandon him in the woods", Cassandra pointed out. "It could have been worse."

"True. – He looks okay", Ty examined the pup quickly by looking at him from different angles. The wolf seemed eager to explore the clinic, but the young vet student wouldn't let him. "His eyes are bright, his fur is in good condition and he moves okay." Ty carefully put the wolf back into the box and removed his gloves, throwing them to the bin.

"Lucky guy", Cassandra said and peered inside the box.

"Isn't there a wildlife reserve nearby?" Ty had recalled hearing about it once before.

"Yeah, I think so", Cassandra said putting the lid back on so the pup wouldn't crawl out of the box.

Meanwhile Ty turned around and walked over to the vet clinic's bulletin board to see if they had an address or a name of the place. He quickly scanned through the pictures, flyers and information and finally located what he was looking for.

When he turned around with the paper in his hand Cassandra already guessed he what he was gong to do. "You're going to call them, aren't you?"

"Yeah. We can't look after him. I mean, he doesn't have an owner and we are not allowed to keep wild animals. What are we gonna do with him after an examination?" Ty said. Cassandra agreed nodding. "They will know what to do with him", he spoke and pulled a cellphone out of this pocket.

Whatever plans he had for tonight would have to be cancelled. Ty already knew that things like this popping up could not be good for maintaining a social life - as if he had one...


	52. Chapter 52

**A/N:** _Yay, two chapters in a row - I'm on fire! That being said, the next chapter is gonna be a big one and I need to do some background research to get it right, so it might take a while, but I try to get it done sometime next week. Meanwhile, I hope you enjoy this!_

Ty had driven on the remote road for almost 20 minutes now and it seemed like he was going to be on it for a little while longer. The horizon didn't seem to come any closer no matter how much he tried to reach it and the identical, thick trees by the route made it feel like he was stuck in some kind of loop.

But since turning onto this road from the intersection, there had been no other options to choose from - no smaller roads, no signs pointing to anywhere, nothing - so Ty decided to keep on driving for as long as he could. There had to be a reason this road been been built here to begin with.

Ty wasn't worried about himself as much as he was wondering how long the wolf pup was going to last in his small cardboard shelter. The brown box was buckled up on the front seat, but the animal was trying to push the lid off so that he too could take a look at the scenery.

So far the wolf had not succeeded.

"Hang in there, little buddy. I hope it won't be too long now", Ty spoke to the pup, hoping that he was right. The sounds of the wolf were getting more desperate and Ty had hard time listening to them. A small box was no place for this animal, no matter how young or little he was. The pup was meant to live freely in the wilderness with his mother. But with no pack to look after him, the pup would have been helpless and most likely dead in no time. Ty wanted to help him in any way that he could and right now it seemed like the best place for the wolf was this shelter that specialized in wild animals.

Fortunately, five minutes later Ty saw a gate and a sign welcoming him to the reserve area. He slowed down when he saw fences on both sides of the road and realized there were llamas behind them. The funny looking animals pulled their long, hairy heads up and glared at the truck they had never seen before. There was something humorous about them and Ty found himself grinning as he drove deeper into the area.

Ty loved cats, dogs and whatever pets people brought in to the vet clinic, but these animals seemed exotic compared to them and it almost made him feel like a little kid in the zoo. Llamas, foxes and buffaloes - just few animals he had witnessed living at the reserve so far - each one brought in different kind of atmosphere to this place and Ty could only imagine that in a place like this every day was different from the day before.

When he finally parked his truck, Ty took a better look at the place. There were pens and cages everywhere, standing in perfect harmony with the surrounding nature. The grass was overgrown but there were small pathways to every cage, and to Ty it looked like everything was in a state of controlled chaos. From looking at the reserve, he could tell that whoever was running this place didn't sweat over the small things but had decided to focus on the bigger picture - which was taking care of the animals. Some of those saved critters looked a little shabby with their half-shed coats and feathers, but all of them were still well taken care of from whatever injuries and problems they had had.

"Wow, I think you're gonna like it here. I know I would", Ty said to the pup and then stepped out out of the truck. He walked on the other side of the vehicle and opened the door, reaching out to get the box. While he was unbuckling it, he could hear numerous sounds of animals from all over. It was like he had stepped inside of Noah's ark.

"Hey, you must be the guy from the vet clinic", Ty heard a voice behind him. He turned around and saw a young man with a bushy beard and a gray beanie pulled over his long brown hair. His clothes were baggy and earth-toned which made them seem almost like camouflage. Something about his appearance was as wild as the animals he looked after.

"Yeah, I am. Ty Borden", he introduced himself and they shook hands. "And you must be Bob Granger", Ty assumed, recalling the name from the phone conversation they had had earlier.

"That's me", Bob said and nodded behind Ty. "And this must be the pup you were talking about?"

Ty turned his body halfway toward the truck and nodded. The pup was now quiet and listening to the strange sounds he had never heard before, one of them being this Bob guy, his new caretaker.

"Yeah. He was brought to the Hudson Veterinary Clinic, but since dogs and cats are more of our thing, I thought you'd be better at taking care of him", Ty said.

"Okay. Bring him in and we'll take a look", Bob replied.

Ty took the box out and shut the truck door by nudging it with his back.

Ty complimented Bob as he showed him the way to his clinic.

"Pretty great place you've got here."

"Isn't it?" Bob looked around while walking, as if he had just become aware of it too. There was pride in his voice as he talked, but he still kept it considerably modest. "Been dreaming about a place like this since I was a little kid and it's been a labor of love for me from the start. Too bad it isn't really profitable. But I think you can agree that us vets really have to put other things before the income, like the well-being of the animals. I mean, that's why we are in this business, right?"

"Yeah, know what you mean. It's hard work, but it also rewards you when you see an animal getting better", Ty said, following Bob while carrying the box. "So, are you running this place on your own?"

"Yup. I've tried to find someone to help me but…" he shook his head, "most vets want poodles and cats to look after. It's much cleaner job, you know", Bob said, giving Ty a meaningful and friendly look. Ty laughed a little and did not take an offense.

"Yeah, I suppose it is", Ty admitted. "So, that must mean pretty crazy hours for you then, huh?"

"Oh, totally. I live and breathe this place. I gotta be aware of everything 24/7, there's no time off. But when your heart is set on something, you can't really let go. Even if I was lying on a beach somewhere, my mind would still be here. So, what's the use of even leaving", Bob shrugged as he smiled at Ty.

They then stepped inside a small hut that, from the outside looked worn out by the weather, but inside it was modern and had everything a vet clinic could ask for. Bob gestured Ty to place the box on the operating table while he turned on the lights and brought a pair of examination gloves from a shelf.

"Did you examine him yet?" Bob asked when Ty opened the lid.

"Well not really, but he looked alright from what I can tell", Ty said. Bob handed him the gloves and Ty stared at him with confusion. His eyes went from Bob to the gloves and back. "What…?"

"You ever examined a wolf before?" Bob asked.

"Well, no", Ty answered.

"You wanna try?"

"Seriously…?" Ty's eyes lit up.

"Well, consider it like a job interview", Bob shrugged a little.

"A job interview? But I'm only here to bring the pup to you ", Ty frowned a little.

"You say that now, but… when you do this once, there's no going back to poodles", Bob said smiling. "Just try it?"

Ty glanced at the pup and thought about it for a moment. What was there to lose? How many times would he even get a chance to do something like this? It was like doing a check up on a dog, right? And he had done a lot of those.

"Alright", Ty finally accepted the gloves.

"That's my man", Bob said seemingly pleased that Ty had agreed to give the wolf the exam. He crossed his arms across his chest and waited for Ty to start.

The vet student seemed a little nervous since he knew he was under a scrutinizing eye, but tried his best to keep his cool - the wolf pup couldn't sense his nervousness or it would cause problems.

"Did you say someone had looked after him before he was brought to you?" Bob asked while Ty was doing the check-up. "'Cause he looks pretty good."

"Yeah", Ty said and pulled the wolf out from the box.

"Makes him easier to handle too. Just hope they haven't pampered him too much. He can't get used to people like that if we want to return him back to the nature", Bob replied.

Ty gave a nod as a sign of agreement.

"Have you had a lot of wolves here?" Ty asked when he started to examine skin and coat. The coat was shiny, there was no brittleness, and the skin was clean with no signs of greasiness or flakiness.

"Few. Ranchers get trigger-happy with wolves around here and many pups become orphans. – It's funny, they are ready to kill the mom, but when it comes to the pups, they are much more forgiving. Lucky for them, I guess."

"Yeah", Ty said and turned the wolf's ears inside out so he could see inside. The pup was a bit resistant, but Ty was still able to see that his ears were in good condition before he released the wolf from the tighter grip. "You have a stethoscope I can use?"

"Sure do", Bob said and handed him one from the side table. For him, the examination seemed to be going well and he liked how gentle yet firm Ty was with the animal.

After doing a quick examination of his abdomen, mouth, eyes and paws, Ty was finished. He handed the stethoscope to Bob and put the wolf back inside the box.

"Well, he seems healthy. Coat and skin were in good condition, ears and eyes were fine as far as I could tell, nothing in lungs or heart, his mouth was clean as well and there was nothing out of the ordinary in his abdomen. Paws looked good too. I'd say he really lucked out", Ty gave Bob his evaluation while removing the gloves.

"So… how was it?" Bob asked. Ty looked confused. Didn't he just explain to him? "Examining a wild animal, I mean", he explained.

"Oh", Ty smiled. "Well, pretty awesome."

"Told you", Bob said as he put the lid back on. "I'll find this guy a place to live. Thanks for the help."

"My pleasure", Ty said and they shook hands again.

"If you ever get bored, you know where to find this place", Bob added before Ty could leave.

There was something Ty was wondering so he had to ask about it.

"What makes you think I would like it here? I don't mean any disrespect, it's just that… I have a job already", Ty explained, but knew there was a chance he could lose it soon.

"I don't know. There's just something about you I like. Sometimes you get a good feeling from someone from the minute you meet them, you know", Bob said, hoping it wouldn't come off as creepy. "I like that you don't seem to be afraid of hard work and you are willing to do something that will make you a better vet - like examining the wolf. You are only a vet tech, yet you showed that you have learned a lot from what I saw of you as you examined the pup."

"Well, I'm not afraid of hard work, you're right about that", Ty agreed, smiling. "I'll keep it in mind. Thanks for the offer."

"Hey, no problem. It was good to meet you, Ty", Bob said.

"You too", he replied.

On his way home, Ty couldn't help but think about Bob's offer. He knew that either him or Cassandra would have to go soon because of the merger and she was losing sleep over it. Ty realized he could let Cassandra know Bob Granger was looking for more staff, but Ty suspected she wasn't the kind of person Bob was looking for. Him, on the other hand, he already had and offer.

Could he save Scott the trouble of choosing and make Cassandra happier by letting her keep her job? Would he actually do everyone a favor by accepting Bob's job offer? It felt almost as if fate had that wolf pup appear on the steps of the vet clinic and Ty had been able to meet Bob, who then had offered him a job when he was in a risk of losing his.

Life was funny sometimes.


	53. Chapter 53

**A/N & warnings:** _Even though I did a lot of background research about this, I'm sure I don't do justice to what Vision Quests are really like, so go with me on this one - after all "Promise Kept" a fictional story, so some liberties are taken to make the story move forward._ _ **There are also some mentions about fasting, so if that's triggering for you, you might not want to read this chapter.**_

* * *

Sitting in a field was nothing new for Amy. She had sat and waited for horses to come to her before in fields just like this, but this time it wasn't about horses, it was about her.

 _She recalled after she had agreed to the Vision Quest that Victor had told her there was something he needed to give her. He took her into the study where he had given her her mom's letter few years ago and where she had lit the incense and fanned it with the feather before her vision that had helped her the first time she was there. Victor walked over to the shelf and pulled down the articles he had given her before - only this time he told her about them._

 _"Do you remember this?" Victor had asked when he had shown her a familiar looking feather. Amy had nodded, thinking she could never forget how Victor had helped her with herself after her mother's passing. "You used this Eagle's feather the last time you were here and it's the exact same one your mom used when she did her own Vision Quest. Usually it becomes part of you and you keep it with you at all times but your mom said she felt like I would find a good use for it later in my life. And I think this is the moment she meant."_

 _It was strange to receive something from her mother after all these years, but it made Amy's connection to her mother even stronger now, as if Marion was still watching over her and making sure Amy would find her way in this world._

As she sat in the field, Amy opened a pouch Victor had given her just hours before and poured out a little of the herbs, then lit them on fire. After that she began to fan the smoke over her head and thus began her Vision Quest as she remembered Victor's words to her:

 _"You have to understand; this is not fun and games", Victor's words echoed in her head as she stared ahead. "Going into the spiritual world is very serious and if your intent isn't pure, the spirits won't give you the vision. Just be pure in your heart and you will find out what you need to accomplish in life and in return you realize how you can help the world."_

After making sure she really was up for the Vision Quest, Victor had taken her to a remote area and placed her in the field. There was no physical shelter for Amy, all she had was this big area filled with tall grass. Victor had promised to be close by with food and medicine in case of an emergency, but reminded her that if she really wanted to do this, she couldn't think about him being there. It was all about solitude and silence. That's when the vision would come to her.

 _"Remember, it's up to you: do you choose the pain of staying where in your life now or do you endure the Vision Quest and the pain of growth for you life it will bring", Victor had said._

He had pressed four little flags - pointing toward North, East, South and West - into the grassy soil and made a square with them around her. They were there to help her with the balance of the universe. This square was where she was supposed to be for as long as it would take. Victor had then told her "to just Vision Quest", and Amy had felt stupid for asking how was she able to do that exactly. He had not given her any specific tips, but she was supposed to just keep her heart open and mind clear, really contemplate and be aware.

For her mind to be clear, Amy had been offered a chance to fast. According to Victor, it would help her be more alert and get rid of the distractions. She had a bottle of water just in case the quest would last longer than the few days she was able to go without.

The first day was strange and felt longer than 24 hours. Amy was so used to doing something or going somewhere, that being this still made her feel restless. Her mind wandered no matter how much she tried not to let herself think about anything but the quest.

As time passed she became more aware of the nature about her; she watched the grass dancing in the wind and the birds flying in the sky. When her legs were starting to go to sleep, she stood up, shook them and eventually sat back down.

As the twilight of the first day began to give way to the darkness, Amy didn't feel that she had accomplished anything that day. Fueled by this thought, she was determined to stay awake as she didn't want to waste any more time.

It wasn't hard to stay awake and alert when her senses were creating scary scenarios in the darkness from the noises of nature all around her, but it didn't help her to focus on the quest at hand - quite the contrary.

That night, Amy watched the stars and felt safer focusing on them. She thought about her family, sleeping under the same sky and felt more peaceful because of it. It had been a while since she had tried to find constellations, but since there was nothing else to do, she spent hours locating the big and small dippers. There had been a time when she had watched the stars and the moon with Ty and sometimes if they were lucky, they had seen the Northern lights too. The more she thought about everyone else, the lonelier she felt.

When the morning came, Amy was exhausted. Her body was feeling numb and her eyes were hurting from the lack of sleep. She stood up and shook her cramps away, returning back to her sitting position. The morning started out warm and she could soon feel the perspiration causing her clothes to stick to her skin like glue. She used her cowboy hat as a fan and decided it was good time to take a first sip from the water bottle.

Later in the afternoon, it started to rain heavily. Amy felt like an idiot for sitting in a square in the middle of the field with the heavy raindrops were pouring down on her. At first she tried to cover herself, but eventually decided it was no use; she was going to get wet anyway. So she embraced it by removing her hat and looking up toward the sky, letting the rain wash her clean. She closed her eyes and focused on the drumming of the drops.

In a strange way it felt like someone was touching her, like she was being held comfortably and it made her feel less out of place.

But as the day was turning into night, Amy found herself fighting a strong urge to leave the area. What if she went insane before she reached enlightenment? Was she really made for something like this?

 _"Remember, it's up to you: do you choose the pain of staying where in your life now or do you endure the Vision Quest and the pain of growth for you life it will bring",_ Victor's words came to her again.

After a while Amy was able to overcome the feeling by reminding herself of the victory she could have over what was haunting her if she stayed. And that was when her mind stopped wandering.

There was some kind of solace in thinking that it was not going to be forever and that sitting for few days was not going to kill her, no matter how uncomfortable it made her at times. She was going toward something better.

Later, Amy left the square to "use the bathroom" and when she came back, the square formed by the flags was starting to feel like home to her even if she did hate how uncomfortable it made her, not only physically but mentally as well.

But maybe that was the point of it all. Maybe she was supposed to be uncomfortable because she was carrying baggage with her and she needed to get rid of it. Maybe pain had become a home to her over the years and she was only starting to see it now.

During a second night, Amy didn't feel so afraid anymore. She knew there were animals out there and she was in potential danger, but somehow her body was getting more used to the idea. Some kind of feeling of safety entered her, as if she was invincible and something out there was protecting her. She was beginning to feel as if she were part of the field, she belonged there just like the ladybug or the rabbit.

Amy tried to stay awake so she could watch the stars again, but her body was too exhausted and switched itself off, causing her to fall asleep. And when she dreamed, the dreams were more vivid than anything she had ever seen.

She had a dream about Spartan, standing in front of her in the field. He was lit by the moonlight, and he moved his head, as if he was asking her to come to him. Amy stood up and left the square, walking slowly to her horse. Spartan didn't shy away but stood there, letting her mount him bareback.

But when she got on, Spartan started to run and she was barely able to hold on.

 _"Stop, stop!"_ was all Amy could scream before she lost her grip on his mane and fell from Spartan's back. When her body hit the ground, the jolt awakened her and she was covered in sweat despite the chilly night.

After that she wasn't able to fall asleep again.

The ache in her body forced Amy to massage her tense muscles carefully. Somewhere along the way her mind had started to feel separate from her body. It was as if her spirit hovered above her and she was looking down at herself. Amy no longer considered it strange, it was just how things were.

The third day was dawning and Amy watched the sun rise through her bloodshot eyes. She removed some of her clothes, that were still damp from the rain, shivering at first, but as the sun climbed higher in the sky, it began to make her warm. Amy hummed to herself, closed her eyes and tried to enjoy the comfort it gave her.

As the hours of the third day passed, the lingering hunger began to make her body twitch and Amy hunched over, trying to focus her energy elsewhere. She was sure she couldn't last another day, the whole experience was starting to become too unbearable.

Stubbornly Amy decided not to leave and search for Victor, if only because she wanted to appear at least as strong as her mother had been.

When the day was drawing to an end, Amy collapsed and fell asleep.

While dreaming, Amy felt the earth moving. The drumming of hoof beats woke her up to a dawning of a new day. She looked around from the shelter of her jacket, shivering like a leaf. The night had been colder than the ones before and it really felt like her limbs were unable to move anymore. They were stiff as a board and her body ached all over at this point. Amy had no strength to move and when she finally realized she wasn't actually sleeping anymore, she noticed there was fog everywhere. It covered her like a light blanket and made her feel like she was drifting. The smells around her had become even more intense, the dirt, the grass, the moist air, she took it all in. She felt one with everything.

And then, out of the fog walked a white horse. At first Amy thought it was some kind of mirage, but the closer it got, the more real it became. The horse watched her with gentle, dark eyes while keeping her distance, for some reason Amy was hypnotized by the old mare.

She didn't say anything , but forced herself up, letting the jacket fall on the ground. Amy did not feel the cold anymore, the hunger was gone and an overwhelming calmness swept over her. After a while she reached out her hand and hoped the mare would come to her.

And she did.

From the look of her, the horse seemed wild. Her mane was tangled and her hooves looked trimmed yet ragged at the same time from the environment in which she lived. She was curious, yet wary, and Amy was careful trying not to move but her hand that was shaking uncontrollably. The horse seemed to sense that Amy was feeling weak, and decided the young woman was not going to hurt her.

 _"Who am I?"_

 _"What do I have to give?"_

 _"How can I heal my wounds?"_

The whispers echoed inside Amy's head.

And when she looked into the mare's eyes, everything started to illuminate. Normally, Amy would have considered it crazy how the answers slowly poured into her, but now it made sense after all she had been through. It was hard to explain, but this horse knew her somehow and she knew the horse.

When the first rays of sunlight began to pierce the fog, the horse turned around and began to walk away. Amy watched as the mare slowly disappeared into the fog, leaving her feeling a peace and serenity from her encounter.

It was time to go back.


	54. Chapter 54

It was a typical day at Heartland - except that Peter was around. He had taken Lou or Jack's place as the safety observer as he leaned on the fence of the riding area, watching Georgie showing off what she had learned from Sandra since the last time he had been home. The father hardly knew anything about horses, or trick riding for that matter, but Georgie was enthusiastic to show off her skills and he was happy to spend some quality time with his adoptive daughter.

Peter had often wondered if he was living the kind of life he wanted, but looking at Georgie's face and listening to how she explained the names of the different tricks, Peter knew that if his kids were this happy, he was happy too. He might not have always made the best choices, but at least he was here now and things were okay with him, Lou and the girls. So maybe there had been no bad roads if every road had lead him to this kind of happiness - or if there was, maybe they had been there to taught him he couldn't know good if he didn't know the bad too.

In the ranch house, Lou was looking through the kitchen window while she was on the phone with Joan, Victor's lady friend, who helped him run his ranch whenever Victor was away somewhere and his horses needed looking after.

Lou saw Georgie trying a new trick in the distance, but could hardly focus on it as her mind was elsewhere, worrying about Amy.

"So you don't know when they will be back?" Lou asked Joan.

Jack watched his oldest granddaughter, trying to fill the blanks between her sentences as the phone call went on. Amy had now been at Victor's for days, but after her message of arrival the family had not heard from her. Lou had of course started to worry about her little sister and Jack too couldn't deny he was wondering why there was this kind of radio silence, especially after Amy had promised to keep in contact. But he was sure that if something serious had happened, they would have heard about it already.

"Okay, well when they do come back, have Amy call me right away, please? There's something important I need to tell her. Thanks. Okay, yeah, you too. Okay, bye", Lou said before she hung up.

"So...?" Jack asked over his cup of coffee, flipping the pages of the newspaper before him. Lou turned around after putting down the house phone and sighed so heavily her shoulders and head slumped over.

"Well, I found out that they are on some kind of..." Lou tried to come up with the name and frowned, "Vision Quest I think it was called."

It might have not meant much to Lou, but Jack recalled something of that kind from years ago. His face lit up, but he was still cautious as he knew Victor wouldn't have had Amy do Vision Quest if he had thought it was not something she needed to do.

"Vision Quest, you say?" Jack checked that he had heard right.

"Yeah. What, why? Does that mean something to you?" Lou asked and pulled a chair away from the table so she could join her grandfather and have a cup of tea.

"Well... back in the day, when you and Amy were little, Marion did something similar", Jack recalled. "That was after Tim had left and Marion was feeling lost. When she came back from Victor's, she was like a different woman. She had picked up the pieces of her life and started to run her family and business with more confidence."

Lou drifted into thought, wondering what it would mean for Amy.

"You think Amy is in need of something like that?"

"Well, I don't know about that stuff, but she needs help, that's for sure", Jack said voicing his opinion. He had been careful in telling Amy what to do, but had always kept a close eye on her, just to make sure she was alright.

"Tell me about it. I've been so worried about her, but it's like she has built this wall around her and all we can do is wait for her to knock it down. I'm the big sister, so it's my duty to look after her, but... I can't do that forever. I know she's a grown woman now, but I can't stop worrying", Lou said, sighing.

"How do you think it has been for me all these years, looking after you two", Jack spoke, smiling a little at Lou's discovery of responsibility. "I've tried to teach you girls morals and ways of handling things, but you've still been free to make your own mistakes. Seeing you in pain or struggling hasn't been easy, but I think going through something on your own always teaches you the best. You forget words of wisdom, but not how something made you feel."

"But what if it doesn't help Amy? What if she keeps on suffering and doesn't see a way out? She's made a big mess for herself. It can be hard for one person to deal with", Lou voiced her concern. "I know you've told me to butt out, but... for how long?"

"We'll see how she is when she gets back", Jack decided. "Who knows, maybe Victor has helped her like he helped your mother."

Lou finally poured herself a cup of tea from the pot, but couldn't stop her mind from wandering. She knew from her own experience that a trip abroad was something that changed a person and coming back home wasn't always painless, especially if there was someone else involved as well - like there had been with Ty and Amy.

It had been weeks since Lou had seen or heard of Ty, but recent developments had made her want to contact him and invite him over to celebrate the same event she so eagerly wanted to tell her sister about. Lou just wasn't sure how well that would sit with Amy.

"What do you think of all this?" Lou had to ask. "Ty and Amy, I mean. When she left for Europe, did you think something like this would happen?"

"Well, whenever a couple parts ways, one way or another, there's always a chance something will change and I think that's what makes the leaving so hard", Jack said, knowing he was lucky to have Lisa and the trust and faith they shared together. "But sometimes something can change even if you are side by side all day and all night."

"I guess so", Lou agreed, thinking how she had always assumed that the biggest problem she and Peter had was living separately. But lately, especially with what she had learned through couple's counselling, she had realized a relationship wasn't just about being under the same roof, but more about being there for each other mentally. Everything else was just extra.

Based on Ty and Amy's versions of events, the young couple had lost that connection while being apart.

"Do you think Amy regrets falling in love with Ty? I know there have been times when I've been thinking if falling in love with Peter was a bad idea. Things are better now, as you know, but when you're at your lowest, all sorts of things cross your mind", Lou said.

"I don't think falling in love is a matter of choice", Jack pointed out. "And I don't think Amy regrets it either. I've found we mostly end up regretting the things that we didn't do, rather than the things that we did do. Take me, for example; I remember thinking that exact same thing with Lyndy, but from her point of view. I always wondered if she regretted falling in love with me. I was so stubborn about living here at Heartland, while she loved touring and making music. Sometimes I felt like I was caging a bird by marrying her, but things changed when Marion was born. She loved being a wife and a mother and Heartland became her home. So the way I see it, things could have fallen apart quite easily if we would have let them, but we never did. And eventually everything fell into a place. And we couldn't have been happier."

A nostalgic smile tugged the sides of Jack's lips and Lou found herself smiling too. She looked outside and saw Peter and Georgie, having a moment together, and she couldn't deny that sometimes things really did have their way of working themselves out, even if it also required a lot of work.

Lou just hoped the same thing would happen with Ty and Amy, whether they would be together or not.

* * *

 **A/N:** _I have some good news and bad news - I've planned to write 60 chapters for this story, so you still have 6 more chapters to read in the near future. However, as the story is coming to an end and I'm tying loose ends, I will probably write all of those six chapters at once to make sure the flow is good and everything is covered, which means_ _ **there might not be an update for a while**_ _(can't say anything for sure because I don't know how my inspiration will work). But after I've written them, you can expect me to publish one chapter per day for six days straight, so that should be a nice thing for you readers._ _ **Bottom line is: I'm working on the story constantly and it will get finished, I promise you that.**_ _Thanks for reading and supporting Promise Kept!_


	55. Chapter 55

"Remember to take it easy", Victor said to Amy when Joan brought the water to the table, thus completing the dining setting for him and their guest. Amy thanked the woman by giving her a weary nod and a worn out smile.

The morning was already turning into a day and Amy could feel the exhaustion gnawing her bones and muscles, but more than anything, she wanted to have something to eat.

"You haven't eaten for days, so your metabolism might be a little shocked that you're eating now", the man continued.

"I'll try to be careful, even though I feel I could just stuff everything in my sight into my mouth", Amy laughed a little.

Victor noticed she was in good spirits - but then again she had just completed her Vision Quest and usually that meant the veil between past, present and future had become thinner and everything looked so much clearer than it did before. The agony she had struggling with was now gone.

"Oh, before I forget, Amy", Joan said, already half way out of the door, "your sister called. She was worried about you and asked you to call back when you're ready."

"Thanks, Joan, I will", Amy said, realizing that the time she had spent on her quest in the field had been very different for everyone else. For her it had felt like a never-ending void in time, but for Lou it had meant three busy days keeping up with the family around Heartland and overseeing operations at the diner and three different days entertaining the guests at the Dude Ranch.

"So… you wanna talk about your Quest?" said Victor offering Amy a chance to speak after Joan left them alone. He knew Vision Quests were a personal journeys, but he wanted Amy to know that if she wanted to bare her soul, he was willing to listen.

"There's so many things going through my head, I don't even know where to begin", Amy said and took herself some bread.

"Well, start where you feel most comfortable starting from?" Victor suggested, pouring himself a glass of water.

Amy nodded and returned mentally to the field, revisiting the thoughts she had wrestled with, and by doing so, she regained the feeling she had had when she had looked into the eyes of that old mare.

"There was this… white horse", she shared. "And I realize this might sound crazy, but… I think we knew each other somehow, but I also know I have never seen that horse in my life. When I looked at her, she could see inside me and something just… clicked", Amy explained further and Victor watched her as she went on. "I could see inside myself through her eyes and I realized there was this big… wound inside me and I think I've always been somewhat aware of it, especially when Dad left and Mom died, but I had just accepted it as part of me. I've always thought that that wound is my battle scar from all the hurt I've faced and I thought I had closed it and moved on, but I realized I haven't. It's still gaping", Amy spoke and blushed. "This sounds so crazy…"

"Crazy people don't know they are crazy. – So, go on", Victor encouraged.

Amy weighed her words carefully as the thoughts ran through her head.

"Well, things have been building up and the wound has gotten bigger and I've just adapted to living with it. Like, it's in the center and I've built my life around it. But I now see that's not what I should have done. I've carried these tragedies and challenges with me, fearing to step out from that weird, sad state that I thought was my comfort zone, because I've thought leaving would hurt even more. But now I think it's exactly the opposite: I should have moved on from those painful episodes in my life and not of held onto them."

The tears started welling up in her eyes.

"Whenever I've been hurt or afraid, I've given all this power to my wound, to my hurt, and therefore I've blocked this… transformation that should have happened instead. The wound has ruled everything I've ever done and it has made me act the way I have. I felt like I'm just a survivor in my own life and not the fighter who has the power. It's not my path to just accept my fate and not do anything about it - I should do something about it, because I can. I always thought that through hurt I would become more compassionate and - I don't know - wise, but instead it has made me… shallow. What I mean is that I got lost trying to help others, when I should have helped myself first. And by not learning how to help myself, I've allowed myself to hurt instead of helping others. And that's not the person I want to be. So, I need help with loving myself and accepting that I can't just have right reasons, I need to do the right thing right away."

"Well, darn it… That's a big lesson you've just learned there, young lady", Victor said, feeling almost breathless after Amy's long monologue. "And I think you will see, that if you stick to what you have learned, you will go far. I'm really proud of you, Amy, and I think your mother would be too."

Amy smiled a little through her tears, feeling as if a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She wondered if it was strange to think that somehow she had felt like her mother had been there with her on her Vision Quest. Amy wasn't sure if it had been the feather or maybe even the white horse that had given her power to see so much wisdom in herself, but she knew that Marion's spirit still lived on everywhere and she would help her guide her way on.

"Victor… Can I ask you something?" Amy then asked.

"Of course", he replied.

"You said everything on this Vision Quest represents something", Amy said and Victor nodded. "Well, I had this dream about Spartan. And I don't know if it's just my nerves telling me I'm afraid to face him again or what, but in my dream, I mounted him, but soon after that he started running really fast and I fell. – What do you think that meant?"

"I assume you saw this dream before you saw that white horse?" Victor asked and Amy confirmed it by nodding. "There seems to be a lot of important symbolism going on there. Horses are messengers, helpers, something between the grounded power of the earth and the whispers of the spirit world. I noticed you mentioned the horse that was gentler and gave you answers was a white one, and Spartan is black. A black horse in a dream usually represents a part of your shadow self, some fragment of your personality you usually prefer to keep hidden. You just told me Spartan started running and you fell, and I feel like you might fear that these dark sides of you are going to take over and there's no way to control them. I know that sounds bad at first, but you should also know that riding a horse in your dream might indicate that you will see an event coming to a successful conclusion. And I think it did - well, at least for now. – You know what you have to do, now you just gotta do it."

Easier said than done, Amy thought, but she wasn't about to give up.

"And the white horse? Did it mean something?" Amy was eager to know.

"You were awake when you saw her?"

"Yes, I was", Amy replied. "It was this morning, just after I woke up. She walked toward me from out of the mist."

"Sounds pretty simple to me", Victor said, but Amy could not see how it could be, as it was still a puzzle in her mind, "you woke up, started a new day and it was the dawn of something new - and I think it meant that you just discovered yourself. This is special because white horse is seen as a messenger of birth."

"Okay, when you put it like that, it does make sense", Amy said after thinking about it for a minute. She wasn't sure about the symbolisms she had seen and what they may have meant, but Victor had studied them for years and they were part of his life, so Amy had no trouble trusting his insight.

"So… do you know what you're going to do next?" Victor asked curiously while they were having their brunch.

"I have a pretty good idea, but… it's not something I can do alone", she answered, looking back at the older man on the other side of table. "And that's why I want to see Spartan. – Do you think I'm ready?"

"Do _you_ think you are ready?" Victor threw the question back at her.

"Yes", Amy said after a small moment of hesitation.

"Then, let's go", Victor said getting up from the table.

Few minutes later, Amy walked into the barn where the horses were waiting to be turned out. The atmosphere was relaxed, even a little sleepy, but there was a small storm inside of Amy. She could feel her heart racing faster as she got nearer to Spartan. The black gelding recognized her smell and lifted his head, looking at her curiously. That's when Amy's yearning to be closer to him grew stronger, even though he was just inches away.

"Hey, boy…" she said softly. "Would you like to go outside? It's a beautiful morning", Amy continued speaking and slowly took the lead from the wall before stepping in front of Spartan's stall.

Victor stood back watching and waiting, letting Amy do her thing. It was all up to her now.

Spartan seemed wary at first, but he too recognized there was something different about Amy since the last time he had seen her. The horse waited, studying her body language as Amy stepped inside the stall after opening the door.

"Will you let me put the halter on you…?" she asked waiting for Spartan to relax on his own. It was important for Amy that the horse wanted to co-operate with her as she remembered what she had always known; she could not force him to do something he wasn't comfortable doing. There had to be respect - and now there was.

Amy put the halter on Spartan and attached a lead to it like there had been no problems between them to begin with. A relieved smile spread across Amy's face as she watched Spartan with teary eyes. They were starting to be a team again.

"Good boy…" Amy said, rewarding Spartan with few scratches.

Feeling different inside after the quest was one thing, but seeing something as concrete as this renewing of her connection with Spartan was on another level. It made her feel as if everything truly was about to change she had been reborn and was starting a new chapter in her life.

"Let's go outside and have a little fun. How does that sound, huh? Does it sound good?" Amy talked to the horse, wanting to make the bond between them even stronger. She could hear a low snicker and took it as a sign of agreement.

When they walked in the pen, Amy could feel herself getting self-conscious being under the watchful and knowing eyes of Victor Whitetail, but after a while she forgot he was even there. Spartan demanded her full attention, she was seeing, in what seemed like forever, Spartan giving her signs as she chased him around in the ring. The horse was playful and Amy could tell he was having fun, but not at her expense this time - this time they were playing together.

The more Amy changed directions, the wilder Spartan got. He jerked his head up and down, never breaking the eye contact with the woman in the pen, always listening to her low cues and reading her posture to know what was going on. Amy giggled when Spartan started to get bouncy, sort of like he did when they were letting loose during liberty training sessions.

"Okay, come on, boy, let's wrap this up", she said to him warmly, turning to face the center of the ring. Much to her surprise she didn't even question if it would happen, she knew she would. As her steps took her closer to the middle of the pen, Spartan slowed his space and followed her. As Amy felt the horse touching her shoulder, Victor started to applaud.

"Well done", he said, glancing at them between the rails. "It felt like I was watching a completely different team from the one I saw when you came here few days ago."

"Yeah?" Amy asked, full of energy. "Well, it felt good. I felt so… free", she continued, brushing Spartan's cheek gently and watching the horse next to her. She couldn't help smiling because she knew she had her equine soulmate back again. "I haven't felt this connected to anything or anyone in a while - I mean, before the Vision Quest, of course."

"I'm glad to hear that. You two sure looked like a good team there. – So… do I dare to ask what happens now?" Victor asked, wondering what Amy considered the next step. He felt like his part in this chapter was over and it was time for Amy and Spartan to move on.

"I think I'm gonna call Lou. Let her know we are coming home", Amy said and smiled even more, feeling like for the first time in months she actually couldn't wait to get back to Heartland.


	56. Chapter 56

When the sign on top of the Heartland gate welcomed Amy home, she felt like this was her coming back from Europe properly. She was herself and not the person who she had felt made a wreck out of everything ending with her taking on the responsibility for Emperor's accident. Though she wished she could have changed how things happened she now knew that she could not change the past so now her focus would be on the future and making it the best it could be.

Amy's mind was now more focused, her intentions were more clear and she was excited to get back to work - but aside from all of that, she was curious to know what the news Lou had talked about was. The older Fleming sister had been very vague on the phone, and after hearing Amy was coming home later that afternoon, Lou had figured it was best for her to tell about it face to face.

While wondering what the last few days had been like back at the ranch, Amy parked Jack's truck in front of the barn and soon saw Lou coming out of the house, waving her hellos from the porch. Amy waved right back, hoping that she could crawl into bed sometime soon. The Vision Quest had left her exhausted and while she was thankful for the results, she was glad to get back to her own room.

But before she would be able to enjoy her own bed again, she had to unload Spartan from the trailer and put him in his stall.

"Hey", Lou said and arrived as Amy was opening the rear tail gate of the trailer. "Promise me this is the last time I will have to wait for your phone calls. It drove me crazy when you were in Europe and it isn't any different now - especially since I didn't know what you were even doing there."

"I'm really sorry about that. I had no idea you would miss me so much", Amy said walking into the trailer. Lou stayed behind, waiting for Amy to bring her horse out. "I needed some time for myself. And Victor has this policy that while we're working, we will not use cellphones", her voice echoed out from the trailer.

"Okay, I'll let it slide, but only this time", Lou promised.

When Spartan backed out of the trailer and Amy didn't look even slightly nervous, Lou couldn't help but give them some feedback.

"Wow… Something must have gone right. You two seem like you're on good terms again."

"Yeah", Amy admitted as she looked at Spartan proudly, giving his coat a good rub. "I had to work some things out before I could work with him again. Like always, he knew me better than I knew myself", she gave the credit where credit was due.

"Well, horses are good at telling that sort of thing", Lou admitted, nodding. She knew Spartan and Amy shared a bond like no other. "So… you're in a much better place then…? I mean, not just you and Spartan, but _you_?"

"Much better", Amy insisted leading Spartan into the barn. "What I thought would be a temporary road block with Ty was actually me burning bridges with him, and it forced me to turn back and face my demons, where as before I would have been so ready to keep on running from them. I think it made me look at things from a whole new perspective; not just with him, but with myself and everyone else."

"So, what happened?" Lou asked curiously.

"I did this thing called Vision Quest", Amy said, putting Spartan in his stall, then leaving him to get settled in while she had a talk with Lou. "Turns out, mom did something like that as well."

Amy dug out the feather from her chest pocket and handed it to Lou.

"This belonged to mom, she used it on her Vision Quest and Victor gave it to me. It was really amazing, it almost felt like she was there in spirit. I wish you could have been there too…"

Lou took the feather, not really knowing what she was dealing with - again.

"When I called Joan, she told me you were doing something like that and Grampa said that this Vision Quest was something that helped mom way back in the day, after dad left. So… what is it exactly?" Lou squinted her eyes, not feeling too comfortable with showing her uneducated side about the native tribal rituals. She had lived in Hudson most of her life and had always been aware of the ways the Natives worked - heck, she had even dated a Native - but there were still some things she had not touched upon.

"It's like this… journey into yourself. I was sitting in this field for days, with no food and no shelter, and I just… did a lot of thinking", Amy explained, realizing from Lou's facial expressions that her sister still didn't quite get it. "It's kind of hard to explain, you would have to experience it first hand, but I guess the point is that you just concentrate on thinking, like meditation, you open your mind to everything. We have all these distractions in our daily lives - you know, work, relationships, commitments - but out there, it's just you and nature. And it allowed me think about everything in my life and what I wish to accomplish."

"So… you had some kind of… enlightenment, or something?" said Lou scoffing a little, yet not wanting to sound mean, and partly because she was not really sure what she was supposed to ask in the first place.

"Kind of", Amy said. "And I realized things about you too. How you've always been such a big help to me. You've kept this place running for years and with little or no thanks. I feel like we have taken you for granted, and when you move out, it's not gonna be the same. When mom died and we were falling apart, you made Heartland home again. If it wasn't for you, I don't know where we would be. So, thank you, Lou."

"Wow… uh, I don't-I don't really know what to say to that", Lou stuttered with welled up eyes. She was completely taken back by her sister's compliment and appreciation.

"Well, you don't have to say anything. I just want you to know you are appreciated and loved", Amy said and went in for a hug.

A huge wave of relief overcame Lou when she was holding her sister. It was like Amy had found her way back into her sister's life and there was no longer a need to worry about their relationship.

"I love you too", Lou said back, pressing her face against her sister's blonde hair. "Hell, I've poured thousands of dollars into therapy - maybe Peter and I ought to just travel to Victor's and spend some time on a field and get over whatever problems we have", she joked and made Amy laugh. But then it was time to get back to being serious. "Are you sure you're okay now?" Lou asked then, stepping back and taking her sister gently by her shoulders as she looked into her eyes. "Because I've been so worried about you and I would die if anything happened to you."

"You don't have to worry anymore, Lou", Amy assured. "I'm on the right path now, and this time I can really feel it."

"Good. I'm so happy for you", Lou said, smiling. Her feel of concern for Amy had finally been relieved.

"So, what's been happening here? You were very mysterious on the phone", Amy said, turning the attention on Lou now. "I want to believe it's good news, but… I can't help but fear something's wrong."

"Oh, it's good news, no - it's great news", Lou said, her eyes lighting up like there was a fire behind them. "As you know, Peter's back and we've been planning our house. It's still a work in progress, but in the middle of all the planning, Peter got down on one knee and proposed to me - again."

"Wait… but you're married already? Right?" Amy frowned in confusion.

"Yeah, we are, but he thought that we should renew our vows, and I think that's a great idea. These last few months have been like a new beginning for us. We've learned to talk about things and are actually making plans together, you know, doing this marriage thing like we should be. When we got married the first time, it was in a rush and so many things in our relationship needed better foundations, but… we're making them now. So, why not start "from a clean slate"", Lou explained.

"Lou, that's amazing, I'm so happy for you guys!" Amy rejoiced and hugged her sister again. "I'm so glad you have been able to work things out", she continued, hoping there was some hope for that for her and Ty as well. Maybe their roads were forever separated, but she still wished to build that bridge back up again.

"Me too. And the reason why I was so desperate to reach you was because I want you to be my maid of honor and help me with the planning", Lou said.

"Yeah, of course, I accept", Amy replied with no hesitation. She wanted to be there for her sister on her special day.

"Well, you should also know that the reception is next weekend", the older sister told her, feeling like the deadline might possibly drive Amy away.

"So soon?"

"Yeah, I know, but… it's gonna be a small ceremony anyway. No big hassle, just the family and few friends", Lou was surprised Lou didn't take her time to make the (second) wedding perfect like she usually did with everything she put her mind bride-to-be noticed Amy's puzzled face right away. "I know what you're thinking - "no hullabaloo"? But let's just say that I've come to understand what's really important in life and how we should focus our energy on that and not what's just plastered on the surface."

"Yeah, I know what you mean", Amy nodded, her eyes looking at Spartan. She had ideas about her future, but before actually going for them, things required little planning.

Amy walked up to Spartan's stall door and the horse came to see if she had any treats for him.

"After my accident, I promised to get better for Spartan and I kept that promise. He did the same for me. And I don't want to waste this opportunity, not when I got a second chance. I'm back to where I'm supposed to be. I've been blessed with this life I've lived, even if it has been painful at times. But now I'm ready to learn from those times and I don't want to have any regrets as I'm moving on with my life. You can't know good if you don't know the bad too. And I know I have it good. This is gonna be start of something new."

"What do you have in mind?" Lou asked, looking at her sister and the gelding.

"Maybe I'll tell you tomorrow. Right now I just want to go to bed", Amy replied, sighing a relieved smile on her face. She came to wrap her arm behind Lou's back before they started walking to the house.


	57. Chapter 57

The side of the road right next to "The Dream Ranch" was the last location Ty would have expected to find himself parked - yet there he was and he wasn't sure why. He had been driving around aimlessly, not sure what to do with his restless thoughts and had then eventually parked his truck next to the familiar location. Looking at the rusty gate and the worn-down ranch behind it really made him realize that it was no longer a dream he had for himself.

Living on a ranch had been more of Amy's dream, but since it had set well with his dream too, Ty had gone along with it. But now, as a single man, he had no reason to buy himself a place this big - not that he even would. The whole ranch reminded him of Amy and it would have been ridiculous to buy it when Ty had gone to great lengths to cut her out of his life with every way that he could.

Eventually Ty figured he was not here because of Amy, but because of the money. The prize money from the Futurity Race and his partnership with Caleb, that he had hoped to use on this ranch, was still stored in his bank account, waiting to be used wisely, and now that he felt like he was being torn in two different directions, he needed to think about the consequences his choice would have.

Ty knew he was now setting himself up for a new future after a failed one with Amy and it scared him as it was unlike any thing he had done since his ex-fiancée had broken up with him - and that was saying a lot, seeing how he had cut ties with many of his old friends, moved into a new apartment and sold his beloved horse during his process to move on.

One option he had was a safe one, but the another one could take him on a whole new adventure and direction in his life. That was, if the other person involved would accept his offer and the conditions that went with it.

Ty dug out his cellphone and went through his contacts. Before pressing the green phone icon under the man's name, he stared ahead, wondering if he was crazy for even thinking about doing something like this. But looking back at everything he had been through, he knew that he had a debt he owned to life. And while money could help him pay for the things he needed to make things in his life happen, it was the value of that life that couldn't be measured in money that mattered the most.

With that thought in mind, Ty pressed the icon on his phone and waited until he heard the familiar voice on the other end of the call say hello.

"Hey. It's me - Ty. Listen… I've been thinking about things and I have a proposal for you", Ty started his speech, feeling the urge to follow his heart in a way he had never followed it before.

Few hours later, Ty arrived at the vet clinic, ready to take over the night shift. When he walked in, he found both Scott and Cassandra there, made some small talk and found out what he had to do for the night from Cass before she headed out for the night.

His fellow vet assistant had told him that Scott had one more operation to do before he left and it was with Mr. Whiskers. Ty was happy to hear that Scott was still going to be there after she had left as he had something he needed to talk to him about.

"Hey, Scott, before you get Mr. Whiskers ready for the surgery, there's something I wanted to talk to you about", Ty said when Scott was about to pull out a cat from one of the cages.

"Okay", Scott said, shutting the cage door for the time being turning around to face Ty. "What is it?"

"It's about the merger", Ty spoke. "And the changes the clinic will go through in the near future. I hope you don't mind me being this upfront, but I feel like I have to say this and be honest with you. I know you're probably still debating who will stay if push comes to shove, me or Cassandra–"

"Ty, I know you're both eager to find out what's gonna happen and I still can't say anything for sure–" Scott said apologetically.

"Please, can I finish?" Ty asked politely before Scott said anything else. He needed to say this before Scott could say anything that might change his mind. The vet nodded, giving Ty the opportunity to finish his thoughts. "I've been thinking about this a lot and even loosing sleep over it, but I think I'm making the right choice here. First of all, I just want to say that I'm so thankful for you taking a chance with me. You've been a great role model, teacher and a friend and I hope that it won't ever change. But that's why I think Cassandra needs this more. She's fallen behind on her studies and is having hard time with her life right now, about the only thing that keeps her afloat is this job. And I know what that is like. Sometimes when I feel like I can't help myself, I know at least I can help these animals here. But… now I know how to help myself and in the past few months I have finally learned how to stand my ground and know I can make it out there in the world, so I feel like maybe it is time for me to spread my wings and fly so to speak. I'm not the same kid I was when you first agreed to take me in, and I feel like maybe it's time for me to move on out from under your protective wing. And it has nothing to do with you, but has everything to do with me. So after saying all that, I hope you understand and will accept my resignation."

"Ty, I really don't know what to say. I hope you didn't think you have to do this this just because of the merger…" Scott said, feeling guilty for putting Ty in that position if that was the case.

"Well, it woke me up, and I really had to think about my life, so in a way it did affect my decision making, but not as much as you'd probably think. I know you have a difficult decision to make and I'm making this decision on my own, though it is partly for you as well. It's not because I don't think you can do it and make the tough calls, I know you can, you've taught me to make them too, but because I feel like this is the right thing to do for me", Ty explained. "And I feel like Cassandra might appreciate it too."

Scott nodded, taking in Ty's words.

"I would have been ready to make you a partner one day - guess I just tipped my hand there, didn't I, but… whoever gets you will be lucky. You've been a great vet assistant, and you'll make a great vet one day, Ty", Scott knew that for sure. "And I don't feel like I am losing with Cassandra either, that's why I've tried to fight for both of you, even it seems like there's a very slim chance you could both stay. Cass is a great girl, she already shows great potential to be a very innovative vet."

"I'm sure of that too", Ty said, smiling. "Thanks for understanding, Scott."

"Well, it's your choice, nothing I can do about it - except respect it. I guess even if it makes me a little sad that we are parting ways, it also makes me really proud. You've become the man I always thought you could be", Scott spoke nostalgically. "So… can I ask what's your next move? Or do you have that figured out yet?"

"Well, I got a job offer and I'm close to accepting it", Ty confessed. "I didn't think I would at first because I didn't want you to think I wasn't being loyal to the clinic, but then I realized someone would loose their place here either way and it might as well be me. So I took this offer of working as a vet assistant further and made a proposal and set some conditions in place. I promised to invest in Bob Granger's Wildlife Reserve and work with him if he accepted my suggestion on how we could take the business to a new level. We still need to talk about the details, make some calls and bring in people, but… I think it has a good chance of working out. I sort of know from experience that it can."

"Good for you, Ty", Scott said, smiling. "When I was your age, I wouldn't have had the guts to make a jump like that, but I admire you for doing it. The biggest risk I ever took was taking you in and giving Cassandra another chance, and I haven't regretted those decisions for a day."

"Not even _a day_ …?" Ty challenged Scott to answer truthfully while there was a playful smile tugging on the sides of his lips.

"Well, maybe they've been _few days_ …" Scott admitted, half-jokingly and both of them started laughing.

Ty was relieved to see the talk had gone better than he had expected. While it was bittersweet to leave the clinic behind, he was happy to move onto new chapter in his life.

And it was one that had been written by himself - _and only himself._


	58. Chapter 58

Amy couldn't remember the last time she had slept this sound. The exhaustion kept her asleep for 17 straight hours before her head couldn't take it anymore and woke her up by aching - her brain was now fully rested and it was time to get busy.

She opened her eyes and looked around, feeling her throat hurt as a side effect of being in the cold with no shelter. Coughing, Amy reached out to get a glass of water to drink from her night table. As she got rid of her thirst, she looked around and saw the mess she had left lying around ever since coming back from Europe. It was like the room represented the chaos that had been in her head - a cross between the old and new - and now that she had moved into this new phase in her life, she felt like making her room look like it too.

Amy ate a quick breakfast with Lou, Peter, Lisa and Katie, then went to the barn to do the morning chores with Jack and Georgie and finally heading back inside the house to clean up her room. Even though her room wasn't big, it took her hours to do the hoovering, dusting, folding and arranging, as she felt like changing her curtains and sheets as well, and while cleaning, she was starting to think about Ty. She was back at Heartland again, both mentally and physically, but something still felt out of place because Ty wasn't there anymore.

When the room was finally clean, Amy put her hands on her hips, looking around to see if she had missed a spot, but everything was in its place. She wasn't just feeling the difference inside her head, something was now representing it too.

But even though she felt content with everything else, the problem with Ty still lingered. She thought about calling him, but figured Ty probably wouldn't pick up considering how angry he had been the last time they had met. But she needed to get these words out of her somehow.

So as a solution, Amy took out some paper and a pen, then sat down to write what she wished she could say to him if only he would listen.

 _"Dear Ty,_

 _I needed to write these words out because I don't think either of us can live with the way things are with us now. I feel the need to apologize to you - and I know I already tried that once, but this time I feel like I have a better understanding that it's I am apologizing to you for._

 _I figured written apology would be better, because it's up to you to read this letter if and when you want. It's also more concrete for us both, and writing the words out will help remind me of my actions and the things I need to learn._

 _I think I've always thought I needed to be strong, that it was expected of me because world is a cruel place (something I learned at very young age). But what I didn't realize was that it doesn't necessarily mean that I have to be hard. Hard on myself, hard on others. I feel like I thought it meant that I had to be right and I had to guard myself from everyone to get through it. But that is not the way to live, that is a way to isolate myself from others and hurt them in the process._

 _Now I want to be more open to the idea that I could be wrong and realize I have also been wrong, hard and hurtful. Life is about accepting that there are flaws in me, but it's okay._

 _When you came into my life, my life couldn't have been more of a mess - and I feel like yours was too. With you by my side, I learned that life could go on despite all the hurt we were both feeling. We influenced each other and you became my best friend. Eventually we became more than friends, and as lucky as I was to have you, maybe you weren't always as lucky to have me. I really did love you - I still do whether you believe it not - because… how could I not?_

 _But I think loving you was also the way to break your heart. I don't regret that I love you, but I regret some things I assumed were actions of love, honestly thinking I was doing the right thing for you and for us, because like the saying goes; "everything in love is fair"._

 _But it's not._

 _Maybe I believed that if love doesn't hurt, then it must not be love after all. But love or loving is not supposed to hurt. I can't justify hurt by using love as an excuse._

 _I unintentionally started to build walls where you wanted to build bridges. I now realize that you fell in love with one version of me and slowly I became something else without even realizing it. Looking back, I had hard time admitting it to myself because… I guess I was embarrassed, even scared, to face this new me. There was just so much to lose. I still wanted everything to be the same, but when you came to France, I realized it was not possible and you found that out the worst way._

 _I've now realized that, just like seasons, people change, and instead of growing together, we grew apart. And maybe we needed each other when we met to start this journey into whatever will be our story in the end, but I feel like right now, we are on our own - and it's okay._

 _When I finally realized the difference in me, it was too late. I wish I could go back, even further than to that day on the side of the road somewhere in France, because this is bigger than that. Looking back at everything, I realize there was no dialogue between us when there should have been, and it eventually lead to this; I lost you as my friend, my partner and my trustee. I humiliated you because I was scared, but what I've come to understand is that my fears aren't more important than your dignity. I feel horrible about the way I handled things, but I don't think I can ever truly understand how bad you must have felt and still feel._

 _I know you've written me off from your life, and I respect that - it's your choice after all and I really did not give you any other option - but I still want to send you off with a heartfelt, well thought out and humble apology, because you deserve better and you deserve the things you've been dreaming of. I thought of that when we got to know each other and I still think that to this day. You have been, and will continue to be, one of the most caring and sincere people I've ever come across. I should have apologized to you long ago and I thought the apology at the ridge would be enough, but it wasn't. I didn't, at the time, understand what I was apologizing for. I needed to understand the extent of my actions and the hurt that I've caused you._

 _So here it is: I'm so sorry._

 _It's up to you if you accept this apology and I expect nothing from you, even though I hope for your forgiveness - not for my sake, but yours. I don't want this to be a wound that will follow you for the rest of your life._

 _I guess I've learned a lot of things over these past months, but I think the most important thing was actually something I learned from you years ago: that we should never accept harmful behavior - not from others and not from ourselves - and it's what we should all strive for._

 _I know change will not happen overnight, but I'm actively working on things now and hope that will allow me and everyone else to have a better life. Maybe one day I will come into your world again and get it right this time._

 _However our stories end, I want you to know, that you have rewritten mine simply by being alive._

 _Sincerely, Amy."_

Just as Amy was shaking her hand out to remove the numbness her handwritten letter had left her with, Lou knocked on the door. Amy took out an envelope from the drawer and folded the papers and placed them inside it. She wrote _"Things I should have said"_ on top of it, as she told Lou to come on in.

"Hey, Maid of Honor, I was wondering if you could help me with the invitations. They need to be mailed today so we have to hurry", Lou said, leaning on the door frame.

"Yeah, sure, I will be right there", Amy replied, placing the letter against her pen holder.

"Oh, and before we do, there's one thing I have to ask, because I want to make sure you won't mind", Lou spoke carefully and Amy wondered what was going on. "I would like to invite Ty to the wedding too - _but only_ if it's okay with you."

Amy was a little surprised, but then again everyone had always thought of Ty as family, so maybe her relationship with him wasn't the only glue that had held them together after all.

"If he will come…" Amy said pessimistically. "He hates me, so… if he can stand to be around me, then he's welcome."

"I'm sure he doesn't _hate_ you, even if things fell apart the way they did", Lou shared her opinion about the matter. She tried not to sound accusing, because whatever happened between Ty and Amy was between them and not her business. "He just needs time."

"An apology", Amy added and looked at the envelope. "Actually, I wrote him a letter."

She took it and showed it to Lou. The older sister read the title, knowing it wasn't meant for her eyes - even if she was curious.

"That's for him?" Lou said and Amy confirmed by nodding. "Are you gonna mail it?"

"Well, I don't know his new address. Do you?"  
"Can't say that I do", Lou replied and figured maybe she couldn't send the invitation to him after all. "So, how are you gonna get that to him then?"  
"I might ask Caleb to give it to him", Amy said, shrugging. "They are still on good terms and Caleb can at least stand to be around me, so…"

"Did you close the envelope already?" Lou asked, getting an idea.  
"Not yet, I was thinking of waiting to see if I have anything else to add. – Why?"  
"Why don't we add the invitation to the envelope? That way we'll find out if he's okay being around you, because if he is, he will open that letter and hopefully accept the invitation. If not, then…" Lou didn't even have to finish because Amy got the idea.

"Yeah, okay. – I'm sorry I'm making this so difficult for you", Amy apologized.  
"It's okay. I would love to have him there, but I also want you guys to be okay about it too", Lou reminded. "Come on, let's get started. And while we're at it, you can tell me all about your plans for the future", she added, smiling.


	59. Chapter 59

The day of the wedding couldn't have been more beautiful; the sun was shining and nature was almost in full bloom which was something many of the guests admired when they started to arrive at the Dude Ranch where the wedding was set to take place. The place was special for Lou and Peter, so naturally they wanted to renew their vows there.

What made everything even better was that Lou finally got the June wedding she had wanted in the first place. Everything was coming full circle and this spring day felt like a new beginning for not only Lou and Peter but for many of the guests as well.

Outside, on the dock that would serve as an altar, Tim and Jack were helping the guests get seated while Amy was inside one of the cabins, getting Lou ready for her big day. Lou didn't have her wedding dress on, but she was however wearing a simple white gown that was almost as beautiful as her first dress. They were joined by Georgie and Katie who were to be Lou's bridesmaid and flower girl.

"Katie, stay still or I'm going to curl your ears instead of your hair!" Georgie ordered her little sister to obey while she was helping with some finishing touches. Amy laughed a little when the sisters argued, recalling a time when that had been her and Lou. So many things had changed since then, but the one thing that had not was that Lou and Amy were always there for each other.

"So, you ready to walk out there?" Amy asked when she helped Lou to adjust a purple flower behind her left ear. Lou seemed nervous and clenched her teeth together when she grinned.

"Yeah, I am. I'm so excited", Lou said. "What about you?"

"What about me?" Amy asked, frowning. _Why would Lou even ask that?_

"Well, have you taken a look to see if he's out there?" Lou wanted to know.

"Oh... _Ty?_ " Amy guessed. "No, I haven't."

She couldn't deny that she had been tossing and turning every night since she had delivered the letter to Caleb who had promised to get it to Ty. "No promises he will read it, though", the cowboy had said.

"You don't care or you're too nervous?" Lou laid down presumed options.

"Lou, I'm here to help you. This is your day. I'm not gonna bring any attention to myself", Amy said and adjusted Lou's wavy hair better over her right shoulder. "If he comes, he comes. But if he doesn't, there's nothing I can do about it. It's his choice. Who says he's even read the letter..."

"Well, you're wrong about one thing. This isn't just my day, this is all of our day", Lou said. "This is about family."

Amy looked at Lou and smiled as she decided the thought pleased her.

"I like that", Amy admitted.

Someone knocked on the door and Amy went to get it while Lou put on some hairspray to help her hairstyle stay in place. The person behind the door was Lisa and she was looking over her shoulder, multitasking by counting the guests and letting the people inside the cabin know everyone was ready.

"You girls coming out soon?" Lisa asked, turning her head around to face Amy again. Amy glanced at Lou, who gave them a nod.

"Girls, you done with that?" Lou asked Georgie who was still struggling with her younger sister's hair.

"It's useless. She's gonna mess it up anyway", Georgie sighed and unplugged the curler. Katie jumped up from the chair and started prancing around.

"Look how bouncy my hair is, Mommy!" Katie joyed.

"Yeah, it looks great, honey!" Lou said, smiling. It was the cue Lisa needed.

"We'll be waiting", Lisa let them know before she left to have a seat.

"Okay. Georgie, Katie - come with me", Amy said as she handed them their bouquets of wildflowers they had collected earlier. Before opening the door, Amy turned to Lou once last time with a smile on her face. "Good luck."

"I already lucked out", Lou said smiling, meaning she was on top of the world because she had an amazing family and everything else she could ever wish for.

Katie went out first, spreading flower petals on the pathway that ended on the dock. Low "awws" escaped from people's lips when they watch the little girl who was so focused on her important task. Georgie followed her sister and smiled as pretty as she could, even though she hated wearing a dress and couldn't wait to get out of it.

Amy was the last to walk down "the aisle" and smiled more shyly, not being sure if she was supposed to stare ahead or look at the crowd as she passed them by. But as she went on, Amy couldn't help but notice the familiar faces who greeted her. The guests included Peter's parents, Tim, Jack and Lisa (who was now back to her seat), Caleb, Cassandra, Mallory and Jake, Mrs Bell, Marnie and her husband with their kids, few servers from Maggie's - and yes, Ty.

Amy felt her heart skip a beat when he noticed Ty and her nerves were beginning to show as she stood next to Georgie on the dock. Peter was already waiting there and flashed the girls his proudest smile.

Ty didn't make an eye contact with Amy, just like she had expected, but his presence let Amy know two things: one, he could still stand being in the same room with her (even though this wasn't technically a room they were in) and two, he had read her letter since he had received the invitation.

Eventually Lou walked out from the cabin and then down the aisle as everyone admired the older sister's beauty. Amy turned her eyes to look at her too, even though he wanted to study Ty's reactions to everything.

But this wasn't about her and Ty, this was about Lou and Peter, so Amy tried to brush her feelings aside as best as she could. When Lou stopped next to Peter, they shared loving looks before the minister began explaining why they were here and what was about to happen.

Then it was time for Lou and Peter to say their vows, which were almost similar to their original vows, and after that they had chosen to end the ceremony by reciting a poem by Pablo Neruda.

The couple turned to face one another and took each other's hands. Their eyes locked and mouths curled into smiles as they spoke:

 _"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close"_ , Lou and Peter recited together, and there were a few tears in the eyes of the audience as they declared their love through the poem. Amy hoped that one day she was able to stand where they stood and say something similar to someone she was about to share her life with.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife - again", the minister said. "You may kiss each other."

The crowd stood up and started cheering when Lou and Peter finally kissed each other to "seal the deal". Amy automatically looked at Ty, who seemed genuinely happy for the couple. It felt good to see him happy and even though Amy feared she was never going to be part of his happiness again, she still felt better knowing she had not completely ruined Ty.

When Lou and Peter parted lips and looked at the crowd happily, the bride decided it was time to say something.

"Thank you for coming here on such short notice. I know some of you flew here all the way from France", Lou spoke and glanced at Mallory and Jake, and the young couple smiled wider because of the little nod to them, "so it means a lot that you would take time to come here just to share this day with us. - I told Amy earlier in the cabins that even though this is me and Peter renewing our vows, this day is really all about family. Few months ago, my grandfather, Jack and the beautiful woman in his life, Lisa, got married right here on this same spot and there was only one witness there back then", she continued and it made Tim smile smugly.

"It was _me_ , _I_ was here. _I_ was the witness", he explained quietly to the person next to him who couldn't have cared less who it had been.

"So if I may, I would like to ask you all to celebrate not only the love Peter and I share, but the love Jack and Lisa share with one another as well. And I want you to look at the person next to you and know that, without a doubt, they love someone and are being loved, because that's why we are all here. Love is what's keeping us together, so let's celebrate it today. You should never take love for granted, because it's the only thing that matters in the end."

When Lou finished, everyone applauded and some even shared kisses with their lovers. Amy was surprised to find this all had removed her into tears but she smiled through them knowing it was all because of the happiness that overwhelmed her. When she searched for Ty's face in the crowd, she found him looking back at her. He wasn't smiling so widely anymore, but his face was still more gentle than the last time she had seen him.

"And I'm really sorry for the way I behaved back there. You invited me into your home and I wasn't a very good guest", Amy said talking to Mallory after the ceremony.

The people were scattered around on the lawn in little circles, and they were sipping their drinks while catching up with their old friends and relatives. It had been awkward for Amy to approach Mallory, but she knew that she needed to do it because the visit to Mallory's apartment still had loose ends that needed to be tied up. Soon she'd be back to France and Amy really didn't want to do this over the phone.

"Well, I can't say that I was on my best behavior either, but someone had to call you out on yours!" Mallory said, grinning, and Amy found herself more at ease about it because of that. "I wouldn't be Mallory Wells if I hadn't."

"You're right. Thanks for that. In the end it really did help me, even though I didn't appreciate it at the time", Amy explained.

"As long as you're back to normal, we're cool. Don't think you can scare me off that easily; I've watched how this dysfunctional family works since I was born. I've become an expert in how to handle the Bartlett-Flemings, there is no one more qualified for that job than me", Mallory said, making Amy laugh. She was relieved to see she could laugh at herself now after taking everything so seriously.

"Well, if we ever need help, we know who to call", Amy promised.

"Looks like there's someone else who might want to talk to you too", Mallory noted and nodded behind Amy. The older woman turned her upper body around and saw Ty talking with Caleb and Cassandra, but he wasn't that involved in the conversation as he might have thought since his eyes wandered constantly back to Amy. "Have you guys worked things out since France?"

"Not really, I tried but... I feel like there's not much I can do anymore", Amy admitted, turning back to the woman in front of her she was having a conversation with. Mallory nodded, following Ty's actions from the distance.

"Well, get ready for him to do something about it, because here he comes", Mallory told Amy quickly after Ty excused himself from the small circle of his friends and started walking toward them. Amy was surprised and took a sip from her glass, distracting herself from her nervousness.

"Mallory. Amy", Ty walked up to them and gave them both a small nod as a greeting. Amy looked back at him, wondering what he was thinking.

"Ty", Mallory said formally to mock Ty's way of talking. "It's good to see you."

"Good to see you too", Ty said, smiling and he didn't seem phased by it. "How's France treating you?"

"Let's just say I'd be glad if I'd never hear Mickey Mouse's voice again", Mallory answered and Ty frowned. "I'll tell you all about it later. Right now I need to go see Jack and congratulate him. I can't believe he got married and didn't invite me!" she left Ty and Amy alone, partly because she still couldn't help her matchmaking skills, but also because she really had a bone to pick with Jack.

"Hey", Amy decided it was better to greet Ty again, since he had barely acknowledged her when Mallory had been there. Ty looked back at her, feeling a little nervous.

"Hey. I got your letter", he said, putting his hands into his pockets.

"I figured since you are here", Amy replied. They were like couple of strangers having a chit-chat.

"Yeah... Right, of course", Ty hummed, wondering if he was going to make an ass of himself. "Would you... like to take a walk on the pier? I think we should talk."

"Yeah, sure", Amy agreed. She wasn't sure what exactly he had in mind and if she should prepare herself with life jacket in case Ty felt like pushing her off the pier, but despite not knowing, she followed him anyway and felt relieved that he was the one who had made the move this time - it was on his terms now.


	60. Chapter 60

**A/N:** So, this is it, this is the final chapter of this story! It's been quite the journey and I've been really surprised by the attention this story has gotten. I want to thank you for reading and supporting me all these months; you have kept me going because of your feedback and I don't think I would have been able to write all 60 chapters if it wasn't for you people. So, thank you again :)

Ty and Amy's careful steps echoed against the pier and when they finally reached the end of it, both of them turned to face each other to have the talk.

"I have to say I'm surprised to see you read the letter", Amy cut to the chase. Random small talk about anything but would not do any good or take things anywhere. Both of them were here for results and not for friendly chit-chats.

Ty looked at her with a thoughtful expression on his face.

"I wouldn't have blamed you for ripping it up or tossing it into a fire", she said, admitting it couldn't have been easy for him to open it and take a chance to open old wound again.

"Me too", Ty admitted. "I didn't think I would read it at first. To be honest, I didn't know if there was anything that could have changed things. Back in France I swore I could never forgive you for what you did to me and I figured one letter could not change my mind. Not knowing if the letter was worth opening just to hear the same old things you said to me at the ridge was the hardest part, because I didn't think I got through to you and it drove me crazy, but so did wondering if anything had changed since then."

"But _you did_ read it. Does that mean something changed…?" Amy asked, feeling relieved for Ty giving her another chance by opening the letter.

"Well, it depends. First of all, I appreciate that you took time to write me a letter and gave me the option to choose if I would want to hear what you had to say. It would have been easy to call me or just send a text, but… written apology is something different. Secondly, after reading what you wrote and thinking about my own feelings, I realized that what I wanted from you were actions, something to prove me wrong - that you are worth forgiving. Forgiveness is not something a letter can achieve, but I do, however, accept your apology. As for forgiveness… that's something you will have to earn", Ty said.

Amy was having hard time, as she realized she had just been given a chance to prove herself. Even if she had hoped for this, she had never thought she would get this opportunity.

"I realize it now, you have changed, and I have too. I think looking back, maybe it was best for us both not to tie each other down, as you once put it. We would have done it for the wrong reasons. As ugly as the break-up was, maybe it has been best for us to be apart right now and not be together as intensely as we were."

"Right now…?" Amy echoed Ty's words, wondering if she was pushing her limits.

Ty looked her straight in the eye, trying to understand what Amy was after. She had stated in the letter that she too had moved on, so she wasn't looking for a relationship with him and neither was he with her, so it must have meant something else.

Maybe the friendship she had talked about at the ridge.

"I'm not saying this is the last time you'll see me", Ty didn't want Amy to put words into his mouth. "I've learned not to say "never", because things I thought would never happen, have happened. I'm just saying it might be good that we are on our own now. Clearly you have your own thing going on and I have mine."

"So what have you been doing then…?" Amy asked. She wasn't sure if his words meant that Ty was ready to be friends again, but if she had to earn his forgiveness then it must have meant that they were going to spend at least some amount of time together as Amy had to prove to him show by her actions that she was worth forgiving.

Ty watched Amy as he considered if he should tell her about what was going on in his life, but then again, he was on his own feet now and nothing would drag him down anymore so he decided to share with her his plans.

"I quit working with Scott", Ty told her.

"Really...?" Amy was surprised. She had not expected something so radical from Ty, but just like she had probably felt like a different person to Ty in France, he felt like a different person to her now. They had not been in close contact for months now, outside that one time at the ridge, so many things could have changed - _and many had._

"Yeah. I'm starting to work at this wild life reserve. I invested my money in it too", Ty went on, feeling a little proud for what he had already done and what he hoped he would achieve in the future. "It's kind of a big place, the guy who runs it needs help. So I figured we could join forces and come up with a way to get some help while helping others too. I contacted Clint and asked his opinion about bringing in some struggling kids to help with the up-keep, you know, so they could learn something about responsibility. I know from experience shoveling manure and fixing fences can seem very dull at first, but it also teaches you something about life and gives you the sense of what it feels like when people trust you."

"Whoa Ty, that's… that's amazing", Amy admitted. "I'm sure you'll do great job. I bet those kids will appreciate you knowing that you know something about struggling as well."

It was hard for Amy to see Ty moving on, but at the same time she felt encouraged and proud that the job he had done at Heartland had changed the course of his life, and now he was ready to help others to change the direction of their lives.

"Thank you", Ty said, appreciating Amy's words. "And what about you…?" he asked, curious to know what had changed since France, or the ridge for that matter, because in her letter, Amy had said she had come to accept things from her life that she had never been able to admit had affected her life before. "What have you been up to?"

"I've done some soul searching", Amy told him, "I gave a lot of thought about what it is that I want to do with my life."

"I thought you were happy in France", Ty recalled, trying not to get bitter about it again since the events that had happened there had lead to their break up. Even though things were going better he couldn't say he was completely happy with how things had turned out. Besides, he was here to get over all that and show that it no longer controlled his life.

"I thought I was", Amy said, feeling shameful about her naivety, "I was in over my head back there. No one had ever given me that much responsibility or "sky is the limit" possibilities, and I thought the world was my oyster. But eventually I guess it's like it was with The Ring of Fire and The Dark Horse… I knew I was looking for a new challenge, a way to prove myself. It was exciting to get out there, see the world and meet people - that's why I thought being a head trainer was what I wanted. It wasn't until things started to fall apart that I realized that I had no idea what I was doing and it wasn't exactly what I wanted, just part of it."

"Oh?" Ty said, crossing his arms over his stomach. "What do you mean by _just part of it_?"

"Well, I sort of have this idea", Amy confessed. "No one else but me and Lou know about it yet, but… I really want to make my own tour. Like "a Miracle Girl" tour. But it would be on my terms and the run the way I want it, not liberty training, not colt breaking, not show jumping… just me being me, helping horses around Canada. And maybe if it goes well, I could try touring in America as well."

"That sounds huge", Ty said, wondering if Amy was really up for that. She had never been big about organizing things, and this was definitely something that couldn't be just thrown together if she wanted to make it successful.

"I know what you are thinking, and you are right, but Lou is helping me with everything I need to take make the business side of it work, and I'm not saying this happens next week, but… I feel like staying at Heartland... limits me. I want to be there for horses who can't make it to Alberta but who still might benefit from my help."

"It makes sense", Ty said, facing the last stage of his acceptance that there really was no way back to the way things had been before the tour. Amy wanted "out" from Hudson, at least on some level, and she had set her heart on helping the horses - and with a gift like hers, it was exactly what she should do. If he had still been together with Amy, how could he have ever denied her that dream. He couldn't have - and that was why he had let her go months ago in the first place. Now that they weren't together anymore, he had no reason to even think of holding her back, so what she really needed to hear were the same words he would have said even if they had been together. "Good for you, Amy. I hope you can make it work."

"Me too", Amy said, smiling gently and seeing some sort of relief in Ty's eyes. They both felt calm, as if they were standing at the same crossroad and looking in different directions ready to say goodbye to the road they had traveled together to get there. They were excited to see what the new road they walked alone would bring. As they walked these unexplored roads alone, both of them knew the same road they had used to travel to this point in their lives would always lead back home and that was something they could and would not erase, ever. All those highs and lows had brought them here and had made them who they were.

"So does this mean we are gonna keep in touch again…?" Amy then asked after standing there looking at each other and speaking without ever saying a word.

"If you want to", Ty said, hoping that Amy would not let him down. He found himself unable to expect that she wouldn't because she had done it before, but he had to give her a chance. Something told him that Amy had gotten his message about treating him badly after the fight at the ridge; if she did repeat her mistake, he had no problem cutting her out of his life. And if the situation was reversed, Ty would have expected Amy to do the same for him.

Like it had read in her letter, love wasn't about pain, and even though they were no longer together, Ty believed they both still had some love left for each other.

As for Amy, she really wanted to prove to Ty that she would get it right this time. Even though they weren't in a relationship anymore, it didn't mean Amy wanted Ty to be out of her life completely, and there were some things Ty missed about Amy too, no matter how angry he had gotten over these last few months.

There was more to them than just being romantic partners and neither of them had lost their appeal just because they weren't dating or engaged anymore. After all, they had not become friends because they had hoped to get married to each other one day, but because there was something about the other that just fit well with the another. The thoughts about marriage had just come out along the way, but it didn't mean it was necessarily how things should have gone. Amy and Ty had learned that friendship was forever, as long as you took care of it - and that was what they were willing to try.

They were not one mind in two bodies as they had been for so long, and they didn't have to be as long as there was communication.

"I do wanna keep in touch with you, Ty", Amy finally replied.

"Great. I wanna keep in touch with you too", Ty said, smiling. Amy smiled right back at him.

They then heard Jack strumming on his guitar and singing simultaneously at the dock as the people joined with their partners to dance. As a subtle change of pace, Ty felt like asking Amy to dance.

"Can I have this dance?" he offered his hand.

"Really?" Amy asked, her lifting her brows in surprise.

"Yeah", Ty nodded. Amy felt like this was start of something new - even though all of the old elements were there. But with closer inspection, one could see differences: there was less pressure, expectations, fear and insecurity now. They were finally both free to be themselves.

"If you promise not to step on my toes", Amy joked, knowing Ty's dancing skills left much to desired. He laughed as Amy accepted his hand.

"I promise", Ty said as they started walking back to the other people to join then on nature's own dance floor.

And Ty's promise wasn't the first nor last promise they ever swore to keep.


End file.
